Wondering what passionate love is? Did you fall in love recently? Can’t help but think of your partner all day long? Anxious if something’s wrong with you?
Absolutely not… this is rather a natural stage of your newfound love. It might last only for a while…but I’m so happy you’re experiencing this beautiful phase!
However, your worries about the changes are justified. And this think-piece will help you get rid of your heart’s deepest worries.
Even if passion is missing in your relationship… this think-piece will help you rekindle the lost spark.
Can’t wait anymore? Let’s dive right into it…
…and I hope you have a healthy relationship!
What is passionate love?
Passionate love is the exciting and overwhelming desire for your partner. You feel happy, confident, and idealize your partner endlessly in this love. It usually happens in the initial stages of relationships.
As per social psychologist Elaine Hatfield, passionate love is “a state of intense longing for union” with the object of your affections.
Passionate love is overwhelming and makes you feel happy, excited, lively, and euphoric. In this love, you feel many emotions at once. It’s usually common in the early stages of relationships.
In passion, your partner is always on your mind. You desire them all the time and feel distressed when you’re apart.
Passionate love usually fades away with desire. Later warm and comfortable feelings replace these feelings. This leads to healthy long-term relationships because passion alone is a fatal addiction.
Sometimes people stay back in unhealthy relationships because of the intense emotions of passion.
However, that’s not all. Many people misunderstand passionate love, so let’s know…
What passionate love isn’t?
Passionate love is a mishmash of a wide range of feelings… many of you might get the wrong idea from this. In passionate love, there are very less negative feelings. Though it doesn’t warrant the absence of negativity in your relationship, you never…
1. Feel jaded or apathetic
2. Ignore one another
3. Forget about communicating
4. Ignore one another’s texts or calls
5. Lie or keep secrets
6. Try to downplay one another or prove one another inferior
7. Hold back your emotions or thoughts
8. Refuse to acknowledge one another
9. Refuse to see one another’s true self
10. Refuse to listen and jump to conclusions.
People in passionate love experience certain feelings. Wanna know what? Let’s get to know them here…
Characteristics of Passionate Love
Passionate love leads to two different situations. In mutual passionate love, it’s called requited love. In one-sided passionate love, it’s unrequited love.
Whichever it is… in passionate love you’ll experience some behavioral, cognitive, and emotional characteristics like these…
1. You think they’re THE best
In passionate love, you feel your partner is flawless. You forget that they might make mistakes too. You feel that they’re your fated pair… or that they’re an angel God sent to you. You romanticize them without a break.
2. They stick in your head 24/7
You either think of them all day long… or their thoughts intrude on your mind effortlessly. You experience it almost randomly.
It might be when you’re busy with work or when you’re idle. You can’t shrug them off your mind.
3. You feel their pain
When in passionate love, you become two bodies and one soul. If your partner has a bad day, you feel broken.
If something good happens in their life, you feel overjoyed. Your mood strongly depends on their emotions.
4. You want to understand them and be understood
You have a strong urge to know everything about your lover. Also, you want them to return the favor. Usually, you want it to build a stronger relationship.
5. You want to be physically close
You always want to be close and around with them. You feel the best when you spend time with them in person. You may also try monopolizing their free time.
But passionate love doesn’t last, it may become a compassionate one. Wondering how they differ? Let’s know more here…
Passionate Love vs Compassionate Love?
Passionate love depends on intense longing for the person you imagine your partner to be. It dies away with life circumstances. Compassionate love depends on intimacy, understanding, and stands the test of time.
Passionate love is all about intensity… but compassionate love depends on your intimacy. Compassionate aka companionate love involves affection, intimacy, commitment, and trust.
In long-term relationships, passionate love turns into compassionate love within a few years.
However, passion never disappears from the relationship. Rather the overwhelming nature fizzles down.
In compassionate love, there’s a true understanding between the partners. You won’t idealize your partner and accept them for their real self. You care for them even after knowing they’re flawed.
You’ll feel a connection, affection, and devotion towards one another… even when you have fights.
However, passionate love is still stronger in some aspects. Curious? Find your answers here…
Why is passionate love the strongest love of all?
Passion is popular for its intensity… and if you really love one another, you might be the best couple out there. However, due to the same… it might even hurt you more intensely than any other form of love.
So, only if you carve your way carefully, you might experience the best of everything. Let’s know what you might experience in a passionate relationship…
1. You live your life to the fullest
In passionate love, you want to stick physically close to them all the time. However, that’s not possible… so, you live every moment together magnificently.
Whenever you’re together, you feel immense joy. You never hold back from celebrating the moments because you want them close to you.
2. You lose your rationality
Falling in love shuts down the frontal lobe of your brain – this part manages decision-making skills and logical thinking.
So, in passionate love, you can’t think straight and even make bad decisions. For instance, they may ask you to marry after months… and you may say yes, even if neither of you has stable jobs.
3. You really change
Since you’re intensely happy in this type of love, you become more optimistic and daring. You feel everything will turn out for the better if you’re together.
However, it may be either good or bad depending on your decisions. For the best part, you may become a confident and brighter person… all because your partner has faith in you.
4. You show your vulnerabilities
In passionate love, you’re head over heels for your partner. You rush to bond with your partner deeply and commit a grave mistake. You let your guard down too fast and show your weak spots.
If the person is nice, this won’t harm you. However, if your partner has ulterior motives, this is their perfect chance.
5. You make crazy gambles
In passionate love, you may not risk your all in the casino. However, you may dump the idea of safe sex practices.
You may get STIs, STDs, get pregnant, rear a family… and down the lane know there’s no future in the relationship. You may end up with life-long regrets.
6. Your pace may ruin something good
In passion, you don’t take enough time to know one another. You jump to conclusions and believe you complete one another.
You may even skip the basic phases of a relationship and not know them at all. When you don’t know your partner and think they’re perfect… you develop unrealistic expectations.
Overwhelming expectations may even destroy a possible good relationship. You smother the relationship in an early phase with high hopes and demands.
7. You may stay back in temporary or unhealthy relationships
Usually, passionate love isn’t real love… rather it’s a form of infatuation but the other person also responds.
You fight and reunite in passion… and feel it’s because you’re inseparable. However, it’s mostly because of an obsessive or addictive feeling towards one another.
8. Your outlook on love may change
Passionate love is full of high and good feelings. You feel you’re the happiest in passionate love. However, when the passion fades, you might deny the existence of other types of love.
You hope for love full of passion… and when you don’t receive it in that form, you may disregard love.
9. You highlight the best in yourself
In passion, you become your happiest version. You believe in yourself and the love sets ablaze your confidence. If you’re usually a gloomy person, you become a brighter one.
Pessimistic people change their perspectives and have a better foothold in life.
Usually, when you shine with confidence, your loved ones and co-worker easily catch up that something is new in your life.
10. With your perfect pair, you may have the best relationship
If you and your partner are compatible with one another, it may turn into a long-term relationship. Passion becomes the foundation of healthy relationships.
Even if the passion fades with time, compatible pairs still stick to one another. So, your love turns from a fiercely blazing flame to a calm one.
You both still feel attracted to one another but with lots of rationality, support, and understanding.
Curious if you’re in a passionate relationship? To know better about yourselves, tally with these…
Signs of passionate love (signs of a passionate relationship)
If you’re in mutual passionate love, you’ll always feel positive about every aspect of your life. You feel an intense connection with one another. The signs of passionate love have some similarities with infatuation.
However, if there’s genuine love in the mix, it brings out the best in you. Come on, let’s know if there’s passion in your relationship…
1. You’re thirsty to know more
In passionate love, you talk day in and out… but you never cease to know. Even if the relationship is short-lived, you mostly touch your phone to contact them.
You text them the most and talk the longest hours with them. Though you talk so much, you find something new and interesting every day.
You don’t judge them if it’s something good or bad. If knowledge about them was an ocean, you’ll drink it all in. Possibly, you know quite a lot about them in a short time.
2. You find everything lovable in them
You romanticize them without a break. Even if your partner doesn’t pick their share of responsibilities… you feel “they’re cute” or “he/she must be tired… no problem, I’ll fill in for them.”
Everything about them is good and sometimes you may ignore major red flags. The idealizing happens to the point of ignoring your pet peeves. You both become all-embracing and accept them.
However, you accept your imagined version of them… not the real one. Of course, it’s not that easy to understand this initially.
3. You plan to stick together in the future
You both share a mutual goal – your happily ever after. You have both short and long-term plans with one another.
For instance, you have common opinions about when and where you’ll settle down… how many kids you’ll have, and when… when you’ll introduce one another to your parents.
Sometimes, you spend your time talking about how you’ll furnish your home. It proves that you’re serious about one another and you put in deep thoughts.
If this sounds like your story, there’s passion in your relationship.
4. You’re ready to sacrifice your all
Do you both give up your precious for one another? Perhaps, you feel you’re ready to spend your fortune or sacrifice your life for one another.
If you’re so in love that one another’s happiness means more than yours, then that’s another good sign of passionate love. Love thrives when you compromise and sacrifice for one another.
As many say, in love, you give away everything right from your heart down to everything you own to see your lover smile.
5. Your affection is boundless
In passionate love, you can’t have enough of touching them. It’s not just sexual attraction… sometimes, it might be pure physical affectionate contacts.
You hold their hand, hug them tight, snuggle up, but it just doesn’t seem enough. Even when you walk publicly, you want to hold one another’s hand to feel closer and safer.
For instance, if you don’t like PDA usually… you forget that, indulge in it, and spoil them. Yet you feel it’s not enough to express your feelings.
6. You confidently speak your mind
Do you feel hesitant expressing yourself? If not, that’s another good sign of passionate love.
Perhaps, you hold different opinions about something. But you don’t change your thoughts to make them happy. You stick to your ideas and be happy even with the differences.
You have faith that your partner won’t judge you for being different. Even if at some point you felt under confident about yourself… your partner helped get rid of those uncertain feelings.
You both know clarity and transparency will help you in your journey.
7. Everything is fun when you’re together
When you stay together, do you feel just excited in general? In passion, you feel every moment is worth it… whether you stay back at home or even go on date nights.
You’re always happy and optimistic when you’re together. It’s like you hold the key to one another’s joy.
Everything you do together is memorable… whether you laze on your couch or do your chores together… you’re always laughing, smiling, making fun of everything in a good way.
8. You soak in emotional intimacy together
Both in passionate and compassionate love, emotional intimacy is an important ingredient. So, this stands for a common sign. In passion, you’re willing to show your vulnerabilities.
You share your darkest fears and deepest secrets in passionate love.
Possibly, you never dared to share these secrets with anyone else. However, you want to believe your partner and entrust them with your soul.
Knowingly you bare your heart to them… hope they’ll care for your wounds and deepen the relationship.
9. They’re your inspiration
In passionate love, your partner sees the best in you through the toughest times. They have never-ending faith in you. Whenever you give up, your partner pushes you to try again.
If you feel they have a great contribution in the present you… then, my dear, your relationship is full of passion. They don’t justify your negatives and motivate you to work harder.
For instance, when you face difficulties in coping, they inspire you. They show you that once you cross a hurdle, you’ll find more opportunities in life.
They always pull you towards the brighter side of life.
10. You want to work it out
You may be a millionaire or a beggar, but life is full of obstacles for everyone. The tough times demotivate you and you think… “Why am I doing this?”
Without zeal for anything, you may give up even on a healthy relationship.
However, when you have passion in a relationship, you realize the reasons behind your efforts. You remember that it’s because you love them.
You stick to your point stubbornly because you’re sure about the future. You know that there’s nothing more beautiful than your current relationship.
11. You feel free yet secure
The greatest sign of healthy passionate love is happiness with freedom. Your partner doesn’t bind you with smothering conditions. Rather, they help you grow like a free bird in the sky.
They believe in nurturing you in the open. They don’t hide you away in a golden cage. They want you to understand life independently… and whenever you need them, they wait for you with open arms.
You feel peaceful, comfortable, light, yet secure… as if a long thread of fate binds you. No matter how far you go, you stay in love without the pressure.
12. You have faith in them
In a genuine passionate relationship, you both will trust one another deeply. Trust is one of the pillars of any kind of relationship.
If you’re passionate about one another, rumors or scandals won’t impact your relationship. When you set one another free, you know that they’ll not hurt you.
You have faith that even if they’re out of your sight… they won’t do anything hurtful.
Whether they have friends of the opposite gender, have late-night parties, go out of town on business… you know they cherish your relationship.
13. You respect one another
One of the biggest signs of a passionate love is respect. With respect, you both and your relationship grow immensely. In a passionate relationship, you both respect one another even during hard times.
For instance, your partner disappointed you in some way. You’re furious and can’t keep calm. But you still don’t disrespect them like – blaming, shaming, name-calling, or speaking absolutes.
You resolve conflicts maturely and focus on getting out of the muddy waters… instead of comparing who’s dirtier.
14. You are one another’s first
Think I’m talking about the kiss, sex, or the likes? NO! You always prioritize one another because you’re precious to one another.
You also never take one another for granted… as you feel that you’ll never have something like this anywhere else.
In some relationships, the excitement dies down with time. Couples don’t cherish or prioritize one another as much as before. They become super busy when they’re done with courtship.
However, in a passionate relationship, you treat them like a King/Queen every day… from the beginning to the end.
15. You know when to give space
Relationships become overwhelming at times because of conflicts, life struggles, different perspectives, responsibilities, and so much more.
You commit to your partner, children, parents, work, your household… The list never ends. This is when you need some alone time.
With space and time, you calm yourself down and feel ready to resume your life.
If you’re in a passionate relationship, you’ll understand the importance of space. Though you want to monopolize your partner, you’ll allow them me-time. And they return the favor to you.
16. You take pride in one another
Another sign of being passionate is announcing your love for them.
Some people brag about things their partner never achieved. That’s not passion, they’re ashamed of their partners and try to cover up their “shortcomings”.
In passionate love, you’ll boast about the smallest things they actually did.
Suppose you both fear spiders, but your partner took care of it all by themselves. You feel happy that your partner ensured your safety and fought their fear for you.
It’s always about the little things in a relationship.
17. You try to groove it up
Passionate lovers always aim to make the relationship more exciting… in and outside the bed. You always seek new activities to do together.
You know that candlelight dinners are romantic, but not enough for your burning love. You always look for varieties… like something cute, sweet, adventurous, scary, new, old-school, and everything memorable.
You both actively nourish the relationship with new ideas. Neither of you is ready to go in a rut and that’s your driving force.
18. They are your go-to person
When in passionate love, you’ll share every minute deet of your day. You may see a huge bug, seal a business deal, get a promotion, burn your food, feel dejected… you tell them everything.
You feel satisfied telling them about the best and worst highlights of your life. Some may say it’s an obsession and will soon wear off. Well, only time can tell… but for now, they’re your journal.
However, passionate lovers only want to share their feelings. They want to multiply the joy, diminish the sorrows… and feel fulfilled with their life.
19. They understand you the best
Since you share every part of your life with them… you become as good as best friends. They understand you like the back of their hand.
They accept your true self so you don’t hide any feelings either. When something is off, they easily suspect it. However, it’s not magic… it’s because they know your real personality.
You feel loved because of this deep bond, where you get both passionate and romantic love and friendship.
20. You’re happy together and for one another
If you find happiness when you’re by their side and when they’re happy… that’s another good sign of a candid passionate love.
If you feel jealous if they’re happy and successful on their own, you don’t truly love them.
And if you’re not happy even when you’re together… there are unresolved conflicts or toxic dynamics in your relationship.
So long their presence makes you happy, you’re in a fulfilling passionate relationship.
However, if passion brings so much joy, why does it fade away? Let’s know it here…
Influencing factors of passionate love
Though passionate love is normal in new relationships, some people don’t experience it. It’s either because they’re not ready to devote so much, or they can’t sustain the passion. These people feel more comfortable with compassionate love.
As per Hatfield, some factors behind its fading are…
1. Your life circumstances
If your life is messy, a relationship is the last thing you’ll want. You can’t nourish a relationship if you don’t feel satisfied with your life. Since your life will need more attention, you won’t want a distraction like love.
If your life is stable, you’ll have more time to focus on your relationship. You may fall in passionate love when you don’t have many stressful obligations.
2. Childhood attachment styles
If you’re securely attached, you may sustain your relationships with intense and passionate love. But soon, it’ll become compassionate love.
If you’re anxiously or avoidantly attached, you may also experience passionate love. However, instead of developing compassionate feelings… you fall out of love with time.
The passion alone can’t sustain your relationship.
Love begins with attraction… so your partner must fulfill some of your desires. For instance, everyone wants a friendly, loving, attractive partner who has similar tastes.
If you don’t have common interests, thoughts, views, or opinions… you’ll frequently fight. There are couples madly in love even with differences. However, most of the time you need something in common to bond over.
Curious whether your relationship has passion? Let’s find out here…
How to know you’re in a passionate relationship?
In 1986, Hatfield and Sprecher introduced their Passionate Love Scale. They framed some questions about their emotional, behavioral, and cognitive components.
They asked the questions to people of a wide age bracket throughout the world to find if they’re in passionate relationships.
If you wanna try the same, then answer these questions…
1. After you started dating your partner, do you think you felt lots of emotional highs and lows?
2. Do you feel that you’ll only ever be with this person in this lifetime? And that if they left you, you’ll feel desperate?
3. Are you unable to stop thinking about your partner? Whether they’re around or not, does your mind always follow them?
4. Do you find their physical movements and reflexes interesting… so much that you study when they respond a certain way?
5. When there are relationship conflicts or your partner is sad, do you feel heartbroken?
If you answered YES to at least three questions, you’re in a passionate relationship.
If you mostly answered NO and feel resentful towards your partner, communicate to save your relationship.
If you answered NO to at least three questions, but believe in your love for one another, you might be in a compassionate relationship.
Are you the last type? Want to return passion in your relationship? Let’s find out more here…
Ways to build passionate love in a relationship (How to show passionate love)
When passion goes missing from your relationship, you may not notice it instantly. When you notice it, it usually becomes too late to rekindle the fire.
However, if you’re still committed to the relationship, you might successfully reverse this change. Come on, let’s know how to show passionate love with small steps here…
1. Speak your heart out
If you think you’re in a passionless relationship… talk to your partner. Let them know what’s on your mind. You may let it be, but that’ll not help the situation. Rather, misunderstandings will increase.
So, the first step of your journey is communicating. Spill your thoughts to your partner respectfully. Don’t play the victim, accuse or look down on them.
You’re both in it together, to save the relationship, cherish your souls first.
2. Make time for one another
Life circumstances are a usual reason behind the lost passion. You are one person but have so many roles in your life. Each of you has different responsibilities too.
You are a child, parent, sibling, subordinate, mentor, friend… depending on your life, you’re many things at once. In between so many commitments, you forget about one another.
So, fix a screen-free and distraction-free time for one another. Spend 30 minutes talking every night.
3. Focus on your common interests
If you’re in a long-term relationship, you’ll know your common interests. Do something that soothes both of you. Candlelight dinners and clubbing are alright, but try something adventurous yet soothing.
Find something that you both like and won’t have any issues with. You may visit a meditation retreat, travel, soak yourself in hot springs, or simply choose something indoors.
Spend more time with positive feelings to bring back the passion.
4. Always be attentive to one another
You’ll always have responsibilities in your life. Someone or the other will always need you or call for you. However, how many sides will you handle… right?
Human beings often take their closest ones for granted and prioritize them the least. This increases the distance between lovers, so prioritize your partner.
5. Make their heart skip a beat
Your partner loves and hates many things. Perhaps, they hate it when you forget your chores. Or, they love it when you hug them from behind.
They might like it when you tend to the children at night. You’ll know the best about your partner’s likes and dislikes. So, do more things that make them feel special.
6. Talk about your past disappointments
Sometimes, tell them stories of your past hurt… since your childhood, teenage, or adulthood. Share stories about how your loved ones disappointed you. Also ask your partner about their past fears.
During this activity, you both will understand one another a little more. You’ll also instill passion and empathy for one another.
7. Lead a romantic lifestyle
Romance is a small gesture of showering love. Some people believe, for romance, they need money and influence.
But it’s the little things like plucking a flower to give your partner… kissing them goodnight, good morning, and goodbye.
Make romance a daily dose of your life. Show one another regular romantic gestures.
8. Put yourself in their shoes
Sometimes, your partner’s thoughts and opinions will clash with yours. That’s normal in every relationship… so don’t disregard their feelings.
Think about their perspective and ask questions to understand them better. Don’t feel frustrated because they think differently. Rather, be grateful that you can enjoy a second side to almost everything.
9. Break the monotony streak
A hectic life makes you tired and unwilling to do anything new. When you don’t spice up your life, you’ll hate it. Leave aside passion, it might impact the relationship negatively.
So, mishmash your life and seek new pleasures.
For instance, if you always watch romance movies, choose a new genre. If you always feel tired after putting the kids to bed… drop them at their grandparent’s place.
Invite passion with a shower of spontaneity.
10. Find something new in the bedroom
Again, if you have the same kind of sex regularly, you’ll lose the touch. So, discuss trying something new, like a position, toy, or fantasies.
Find out your common turn-ons and work on them. If you have mismatching tastes, try negotiating. Sex may help you refill passion in your relationship.
11. Indulge in physical intimacy
In your daily life, outside your bedroom, how much do you touch one another? Usually, long-term couples forget about this fact.
Initially, you were all over one another’s bodies. But now you only restrict that in the bedroom… probably because of kids and elders. Well, then indulge in more regular physical intimacy.
For instance, hug one another when you leave for or return from work.
12. Find out what your heart desires
Know what you truly want in your relationship. Unless you’re sure about your desires, you might confuse your partner.
So, figure out yourself first… are you happy with this relationship? Did you ever consider a breakup? If you’re satisfied in this relationship, then work extra hard to bring back passion.
13. Adjust and meet in the middle
When you two don’t have similar expectations, compromise. If you love one another, then you’ll both willingly compromise.
Otherwise, if someone feels they sacrificed more, they’ll always feel disadvantaged. Unequal or disproportionate compromises always create misunderstandings in relationships.
Passion will soon return if you somewhat align your goals.
14. Relive the mesmerizing moments
If you have a precious memory you miss, recreate it. Perhaps, your first date has a special place in your heart. Or, your partner still talks about the day you proposed.
Whether it’s your favorite day or theirs, bring back that time. Visit that venue, redo that proposal, or even take your vows once more. Passion will soon follow with the past memories.
15. Develop emotional connections
How do you build emotional intimacy? Do you have conversations or silently spend quality time? Do you do it while spending distraction-free moments or enjoying activities like gardening?
Leave behind your judgmental sides and focus on one another’s thoughts. With emotional intimacy, you’ll soon regain passion in your relationship.
16. Be more nosy about them
When was the last time you asked about their life? Do you know how they’re holding up at work? Did you ever ask about what they want in their future?
Show more interest in their present, future, and even the past. With time, human beings and their circumstances change. So, your beau’s thoughts might change too.
It won’t hurt to just generally ask about their life. You’ll eventually know a few tricks to instill passion again.
17. Appreciate them verbally
When you ask about their life struggles, you’ll know their victories and defeats. You’ll know about their sacrifices and efforts. Hug them tight and express your appreciation.
Tell them how their efforts gave you a better life. Even if they didn’t win every time, thank them. Never make fun of their pain because you experienced worse.
18. Surprise them with your thoughtfulness
Did your partner ever express excitement about anything? It might be a pair of shoes, a utility machine, a dress, a tie, or even a gadget. If they ever do, note it down.
Next time, surprise them with that gift. Even if it’s a bit expensive, take your time saving for it. If you love them, spoil them to show they’re special.
19. Immerse in your past flirtations
Remember the times when you first started dating? How did you flirt back then? Possibly, it’s not the same anymore… right? So, why don’t you work on bringing that back?
Your passionate days might return if you flirt like youngsters once again. Stop worrying about your age. Flirting isn’t restricted to teenagers or young adults.
Tease your partner, make them realize you love them like the older times.
20. Chant “I love you”
Seriously though… How many times do you say and mean that? In long-term relationships, couples either forget to use these words… or use them mindlessly.
When was the last time you looked into your partner’s eyes and said it? Can’t remember, right? Because you always mumble or yell it to them and never spare them a glance.
From now on, grab your partner’s waist, hug them or look them in the eye, say “I love you”, and seal it with a kiss. Passion can’t resist returning to your relationship.
21. Snuggle up more
Whether you have sex or not, how much do you snuggle together? When was the last time you did it? Probably, you’re too tired after a long day and fall asleep first.
Imagine how lonely your partner feels. They return to bed only to find you in a deep slumber. Wait for your partner before sleeping. If they have too many responsibilities, give them a hand.
Cuddle together to bring passion back on track.
22. Send love notes to one another
When you’re apart from one another – for work or family issues – how frequently do you text one another? Scratch that, how many I love you texts do you exchange?
Not much? Perhaps your busy life is in the way. How about you leave sticky notes for one another? Write one lovely appreciation note every day on a sticky note… and stick it somewhere they’ll notice.
23. Understand each other’s love languages
Identify your love languages from affirmative words, service, gifts, spending time, and physical contact. You and your partner might have different love languages.
So, you might express your love with gifts… but your partner wants affirmative words. Once you know one another’s a love language, focus on showing love their way.
They’ll understand your efforts and feel passionate about you.
24. Be one another’s personal masseuse/masseur
You might not have enough time every day to do this. So, save the weekends for a massage. Help one another out to help get rid of fatigue and exhaustion.
You’ll also indulge in physical intimacy and feel good together. Make new cherishing memories together to rekindle the passion in your love story.
25. Indulge in paperbacks and caffeine
When you both feel lazy on Sunday evenings… grab a nice book and a cup of instant coffee. Read out loud some romantic or funny dialogues from the book while you sip on the refreshing beverage.
You don’t always need fancy dates or expensive gifts to feel special. Sometimes, turn the simplest moments into magical ones. Love will follow your relationship right back.
26. Makeup every night before bed
Relationships and conflicts go hand in hand. Even Disney couples fought over petty things… so it’s natural in relationships. However, there’s a secret to restoring passion despite fights.
Resolve your fight every night… nope, it’s not about angry sex! Before you retire for the night, sit together and discuss your issues.
Find out the problems, understand one another’s views, and solve them. Don’t let the conflicts grow stale and snowball into big issues.
27. Build the anticipation
When you have sex, don’t just hop in and do it. Take more time and tease your partner. Focus on foreplay, build sexual tension, and make them feel frustrated.
If you heighten their sensitivity, they’ll climax harder than usual. This is another good way to build passion with sexual activities.
28. Mark your calendar for sex
Another way is planning sex dates to keep them longing for more. Text them naughty things throughout the day so they itch for the real action.
Some people believe in the spontaneity of sex to make it exciting. However, if you know when you’ll have sex, you can take extra measures to make everything special.
You and your partner both have the scope to surprise one another.
29. Love yourself
If you don’t love yourself, you can’t love anyone either.
Suppose, a mother bird doesn’t eat anything and brings back all the worms for her children. Do you think she’ll survive long enough to nourish the children?
Similarly, you also need love and affection, so take some time to nurture yourself. On the other hand, if you don’t love or prioritize yourself… your partner won’t understand what you desire.
30. Consult a couples’ therapist
If you fail to bring back passion even after trying everything… it’s time to take expert opinion. An expert will help you communicate effectively and carve out suitable steps to make your relationship work.
Wondering what’s the fuss about passion love? Let’s check out more about them from…
Experts comments about passionate love
Literature and media always focussed on passionate love. If you check out the romance genre for books, movies, or animation, it’s mostly about passion.
If you still didn’t notice the passion buzz in literature, let’s check the passionate love examples of novelists…
1. Anais Nin (A Journal of Love)
“We efface an hour by passionate love, without twists, without aftertaste. When it is finished, it is not finished, we lie still in each other’s arms lulled by our love, by tenderness, sensuality in which the whole being can participate.”
2. Edgar Allan Poe (Annabel Lee)
“We loved with a love that was more than love.”
3. Ernest Hemingway (A Moveable Feast)
“We would be together and have our books and at night be warm in bed together with the windows open and the stars bright.”
4. George Moore (Letter to Lady Cunard)
“The hours I spend with you I look upon as sort of a perfumed garden, a dim twilight, and a fountain singing to it. You and you alone make me feel that I am alive. Other men it is said have seen angels, but I have seen thee and thou art enough.”
5. Herman Hesse
“If I know what love is, it is because of you.”
6. Honore de Balzac (Passionate Prose: Balzac’s Love Letter)
“I can no longer think of anything but you. In spite of myself, my imagination carries me to you. I grasp you, I kiss you, I caress you, a thousand of the most amorous caresses take possession of me.”
7. Rainer Maria Rilke
“Love consists in this, that two solitudes protect and touch and greet each other.”
8. J. R. R. Tolkien (The Fellowship of the Ring)
“I would rather share one lifetime with you than face all the ages of this world alone.”
9. Sarah Bernhardt
“Your words are my food, your breath my wine. You are everything to me.”
10. Theodor Seuss Geisel
“You know you’re in love when you don’t want to fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”
However, you might still have some questions about passionate love. For more information, check this…
FAQs about passionate love
Though not new, nobody knew so many forms of love. Passionate, compassionate, romantic, platonic… There are so many different types of love.
However, so less knowledge is available to the masses. You might feel more curious about this… like why it fades or when it’s wrong. Let’s clear all the confusion here…
You’ll usually experience passionate love in the early stages of relationships. It’s when you’re both infatuated and romanticize one another. With the growth of infatuation, passionate love also grows.
With time passionate love turns into compassionate love. The obsession diminishes but sudden spurts of passion linger in the relationship.
Further, the new form of love depends on companionship, intimacy, empathy, and an unbreakable connection. This kind of love provides marital satisfaction, personal satisfaction, and confidence.
The best relationships have both passionate and compassionate love.
Passionate love is strong but not enough to sustain relationships. It results in intense attraction, obsession, addiction, and maddening feelings… However, it always fades.
To build a long-term relationship, you’ll need more than just passionate love, like intimacy.
Passionate love fades mainly because people push it away. Their actions usually depend on insecurities, obsession, jealousy, indifference, and lack of enthusiasm. The main factors are…
1. Childhood learned behaviors
If your parents neglected you, you possibly learned to fend for yourself while you clung to them. If they were intrusive, you avoided them since childhood. If they were too strict, you possibly made a fuss until they gave in.
Children always find out ways to cope with their parents. However, it becomes a habit and impacts their adult relationships.
They pair with people similar to their parents. In the long run, they get hurt and the passion fades.
2. Attachment issues
People with anxious or avoidant attachment styles face trouble finding a partner. They might choose someone who reassures them continuously or is emotionally unavailable, respectively.
In the long run, they find out that their partners only complement their attachment style but there’s no compatibility.
Some people fall in love with others’ superficial qualities like appearances. Such relationships have no emotions, feelings, or intimacy. So, they also fall out of love soon.
Sometimes, couples fall in love with the idea of “being in love”. They obsess over relationships rather than one another. When they get bored of the idea, the passion fades.
If someone makes bad life decisions after falling in love, that’s when passionate love is too much.
Perhaps, they prioritize their partner so much that their work performance suffers. Or, they spend extravagantly for love to the point of bankruptcy.
When someone behaves crazily – literally and not figuratively – that’s the cue.
They might show symptoms of addiction to substance and non-substance.
If passionate love becomes an obsession or triggers any painful feelings, it’s time to seek a specialist.
A word from ThePleasantRelationship
Passionate love feels great, boosts confidence, and brings out your best side. However, its downsides are equally dangerous. The type of love itself isn’t bad… it’s more about how an individual reacts to it.
If someone can’t think logically after falling in love, it’s really concerning. So, seeking a mental health expert is the best solution. But that doesn’t mean passion may make you mentally ill.
So long you’re aware of your actions and their consequences, it mustn’t impact you negatively.
At some point, passion will fade away, so enjoy this feeling now. However, if you can’t feel love without passion, consider seeking therapy.
Surabhi wakes up every day with a drive to craft words that can create a soulful impact. Creatively adventurous, she is always seeking to learn new skills and acquire new experiences. With a hidden soft corner for languages (especially Urdu), she writes poetry occasionally, binges on romantic shows, and LOVES to talk. A hustler, admirer, chaser, Surabhi is just another-someone who refused to give up on her dreams. She says, she is just somebody who’s trying to make herself a writer and for now, she’s just writing...