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Ghosting Someone: Everything You Need To Know

Ghosting Someone: Everything You Need To Know

Updated on Dec 01, 2023

Reviewed by Julianne Cantarella, MSW, LSW , Certified Relationship Coach

Ghosting Someone - Definition, History, Signs, Reasons, Effects and More

Are you curious to know about ghosting someone? Or are you on the receiving end of it? Perhaps you haven’t heard from your partner in a while? 

I feel heartbroken to know you experienced this. I’m also glad that you reached out… because this think-piece will provide you with everything you need.

So, let’s learn to heal and protect ourselves better from next time.

However, if you’re the one ghosting someone… and you’ve your reasons to back it, it’s alright. I also considered such possibilities. Mate, whatever you’re going through… you’ll soon find your answers here. 

So, without further ado, let’s first learn…

Ghosting Someone Infographics

Ghosting Someone - Meaning, Early Signs & Why Do People Ghost Someone
Ghosting Someone – Meaning, Early Signs & Why Do People Ghost Someone
Effects of Ghosting Someone - On the Ghosted & Ghoster
Effects of Ghosting Someone – On the Ghosted & Ghoster
How to Ghost Someone & How to Deal with Being Ghosted
How to Ghost Someone & How to Deal with Being Ghosted

Ghosting someone: What it means?

When a person dates another and has a great time together but suddenly leaves them without any explanation, it’s called ghosting someone.

You meet a person through online dating apps and deeply fall in love. You didn’t imagine or mistake friendliness as love… because the other person reciprocates as much as you.

You might even have sex, talk about the future, plan how many children you want, or even discuss family matters. You find all the signs of being in a serious commitment.

Everything was going great… and then suddenly they cut off all communication with you. Without any explanation they disappear on you, leaving you feeling confused about everything.

There was no hint of taking space and you possibly didn’t expect it. In this situation, you’ve been ghosted and that person is the ghoster.

You feel hurt, paranoid, and shocked due to the sudden happening. Since the ghoster didn’t give away proper reasons, they have a chance to return to your life when it’s convenient.

Wondering what the term literally means? Let’s find out from here…

What is ghosting?

Literally, ghosting is slang used to describe a person’s sudden disappearance. It’s possible in friendships and familial relationships too.

“Ghosting” is a recently rising internet slang in the dating app world. It is when someone cuts off all communication suddenly and without explanation.

You don’t get any signs of their sudden delay at all. If you try to connect to them, you don’t receive closure at all.

According to Los Angeles clinical psychologist, Ramani Durvasula, the term ghosting literally means someone vanishing into thin air like a ghost.

Usually popular in romantic relationships, but you might get ghosted by a friend or family member too.

It is the easiest way for a ghoster to cut all contact without any confrontation.

Is Ghosting Someone OK?

Ghosting might be okay in abusive or toxic relationships. But it’s a big NO when you consider long-term healthy relationships.

If a person uses ghosting to bail out of a healthy and long-term relationship… that’s definitely not okay.

However, if your romantic interest is in another serious relationship, commits illegal actions, behaves unpleasantly, or has toxic or abusive traits… it’s OK to ghost them.

You’ll do it for your own safety and you owe them nothing. It’s a form of self-protection from potential harm… if your instincts are loud, don’t bury their voice with guilt.

You don’t need to justify your actions when you feel threatened.

Curious when all of it began? Come on, follow this trail…

History of ghosting

The term gained popularity around 2013 and recognition in 2017. However, it was common in the hip-hop genre ghostwriting. It was also used when people never returned after going out. Or, when people bailed out from parties silently.

Around 2013, the word ghosting gained popularity with the rise of online dating. In 2017, the term gained recognition in the Merriam-Webster dictionary.

However, the term dates back to the 1990s. Back then, scholars and writers defined the term ghost-writing in the hip-hop genre. 

People used this term way before online dating came in. It was when someone went out to buy milk and never returned. They don’t even leave a way to contact them.

And even earlier, people used it to define “without explanation withdrawing from a gathering”.

Wondering how the term reached its final definition? After all, there were so many different definitions. Let’s check it here…

Since the moment online dating became a thing… People find it easier to meet new people and leave them in the same way.

With the surge in online dating, more ghosting incidents occurred… more people discussed their experience, and then the term gained popularity.

Anxious if you are or will be ghosted? Let’s check some…

Early signs of ghosting someone

Being ghosted is a painful feeling. So, it’s best if you can catch your ghoster early and save yourself from the pain.

However, who will ever understand a ghoster’s mind? They’re so unpredictable… well now you can with these signs…

1. You feel you’re bothering them

Why do you feel you’re bothering them? Is it their attitude towards you? Perhaps, they ignore your calls nowadays… or hug you back half-heartedly… or is it because they don’t smile like before?

A sudden change in attitude is quite common in ghosters. However, if they said it themselves, they aren’t worth your time.

2. They’re emotionally withdrawn around you

During dates, do they pay attention to you? Do they show enough enthusiasm to share their life deets?

If they’re always checking their phone or watch… they’re either checking out other matches or waiting for another date afterward.

Lack of attention is a sure-fire sign of disrespect and you mustn’t tolerate it.

3. Or, they never initiate dates

Did they suddenly lose interest in date nights? Perhaps they tell you they’re too busy? And you don’t wanna bother them in their hectic schedule.

Honestly, if they are interested, they’ll at least have an at-home date or meet you weekly. Or, they’ll send apology texts for not meeting you. They’re clearly preparing for the move.

4. They’re nowhere in your dating app

If you feel something is wrong, keep track of their dating app account and other social media (if you’re connected). Regularly check if they unmatched or blocked you.

Usually, ghosters break off all contact on social media platforms. This might happen slowly like one app at a time, or overnight.

5. Their texts aren’t bubbly anymore

If their texts mostly include “mmm, ok” and the likes… they don’t want to put in any more effort. They found you, had their share of fun and had lots of time back then.

However, they’re ultra-busy out of the blue and can’t even call or text? They might be busy, life might go wrong… but if they are really dedicated, they’ll definitely share the issues with you.

If they can’t reply to a small “I’m busy, catch you later”, you’re not a priority anymore.

People can communicate if things don’t work out… so what’s the point? Let’s know more from…

Why do people ghost someone?

Different people find different perks about ghosting. Some don’t bother communicating, some fear it. Some people know that nobody can catch them and take advantage of dating apps.

It can be a mental health issue or some unknown fear. Let’s get right to business…

1. It’s just too convenient

Breakup conversations are hard and sensitive… and not many know how to handle such situations. People don’t understand how to give closure about where things went wrong.

Many people out there believe cutting all ties will help them escape from these difficult conversations. Since it’s a dating app or social media… They always use convenient options like Unfollow, Unfriend, and Block.

2. The options seem overwhelming

Some just can’t believe there are so many people out there looking for a date. They scroll through humans like objects and test out all the possibilities.

They don’t feel satisfied even in a healthy relationship. So, they burden themselves with multiple choices. Such people usually juggle multiple dates at once to keep their options open.

And they never care about the emotional cruelty you suffer… because they’re too busy finding the perfect one.

3. They fear confrontations

Some people can’t handle confrontation. In real life, if they have fights, they’ll give other silent treatment.

In online dating, they have the option of completely withdrawing without much effort. If you had a fight or if they were about to break up… there will be a fight.

They always choose the more comfortable option.

4. They fear hurting you

Though vague, some people will ghost simply because “I don’t wanna hurt you”. They fall out of love but can’t express their situation.

It’s more like… if you’re hurt for them, it hurts their feelings. They try to hide their selfish thoughts with confusing ideas.

5. They’re low on emotional intelligence

Emotional intelligence or EQ helps people choose suitable emotional responses in different situations. It’s the ability to apply empathy and choose the best solution.

People with low EQ might face difficulties understanding others’ responses to ghosting. They don’t understand where they went wrong.

6. Their emotions are missing

Mental health conditions like depression and bipolar disorder make a person emotionally unavailable.

They try to create meaningful connections in life… However, they begin withdrawing from all communication when the sickness kicks in.

Such people must seek mental health professionals if they want to fix their emotional unavailability.

7. They fear commitments

Some people are afraid of relationships itself. They might have old scars from an abusive or toxic relationship. Or, simply fear taking responsibility.

Now, you may ask then why do they begin dating at all? Well, they have pure intentions when they begin… but when it’s time for commitment, they can’t stay calm.

They choose to ghost to feel safe and secluded.

8. They lack confidence

Some people simply aren’t confident by nature. They feel nobody likes them… and maybe your partner thinks the same. They think you’re too good for them and they don’t deserve you.

Sometimes people ruin the healthiest relationships with self-esteem issues.

9. It’s an attachment issue

Did your partner experience something traumatic in their childhood? Perhaps they fear being attached with others emotionally. If they have an avoidant attachment style, they might show ghosting behavior.

They basically want to shield themselves from possible threats… like you dumping them and crushing their heart.

10. It’s their personality traits

Some mental health conditions disable a person from understanding emotions. They don’t understand how society works, what’s socially acceptable, or even the right communication skills for it.

Some examples of such mental disorders are

  • Autism spectrum disorder
  • Narcissistic Personality disorder
  • Antisocial Personality disorder
  • Borderline Personality disorder
  • Alexithymia

Wondering if ghosting harms anyone? It does… let’s know them here…

Effects of ghosting someone

Ghosting has effects on both parties. If someone ghosts you, you’ll feel the regular effects of rejection. However, the ghoster might hurt themselves in the long run and be unaware of it.

Depending on that, let’s head forward…

On the ghosted

Being ghosted feels like a slap on your confidence and self-esteem. It feels as if there’s a ball of negativity in your heart… but you can’t express your feelings properly. Let’s know the effects of ghosting relationships on the victims…

1. You sink in self-doubt

When someone ghosts you, you’ll firstly doubt yourself. Since you never had any bad memories with the ghoster… you take the blame on yourself.

You seek answers to questions like “Did I step on a landmine?” “Did I hurt them?” “Where did I go wrong?” You don’t doubt yourself and your worth. It feels like they threw you out after using.

2. It triggers your vulnerabilities

Everyone is full of insecurities and ghosting amplifies the negative feelings.

If you only went on a date, you’ll question “I guess I’m not pretty/handsome…” “It must be because my style sucks.”

If you indulges in sex with them, your mind will be full of “Am I bad in bed?” “Did I turn them off?” “Am I too heavy/lean?”

But you never know the truth because your generous ghoster can’t give you closure.

3. You lose confidence

Ghosting is one of the worst things in modern dating life… people possibly don’t ghost their enemies either. It abruptly sucks away your confidence.

People, after the first time being ghosted, delete their dating accounts. They give up on dating, lose their faith in love and feel unlovable. It’s a lot of negativity at once… to handle.

Some people might even get into depression.

4. You feel like you lost a piece of you

Since there was no proper breakup, if you emotionally engage with the other person too much… ghosting instills feelings of a loved one’s death.

You feel they’re no longer alive in this world… It hurts way more than a normal breakup.

5. You have trust issues

In the long run, being ghosted can instill trust issues in you. You don’t trust others’ intentions easily because of this one-time deep scar.

It’s best to seek medical advice and treatment if you face trouble trusting others.

Next, let’s check the opposite side…

On the ghoster

Ghosters usually never understand how they harm themselves. They focus on the short-term results and try to escape.  

But, they unknowingly harm their maturity in several ways. Let’s know what happens… 

1. You stop your emotional growth

If you’re habituated to ghosting, it stunts your emotional growth. You don’t understand how real relationships work because you don’t give it the chance.

Also, you seek similar short-term relationships repeatedly. You might fear getting serious or think that relationships must always be short and cute without any complications.

2. It harms your soft skills

Being a ghoster, since you always run away from relationship problems… you destroy your existing soft skills like communication and problem-solving abilities.

You might face difficulty facing issues in any area of your life. You’ll always seek an escape route in whatever situations.

3. You feel lonely

When you end potential relationships consecutively, you can’t possibly feel optimistic about it. It might feel great to hit up different people every day and that feels exciting.

However, does it quench your thirst for love and affection? A few months’ relationships can’t support you through your darkest hours.

In the end, you’re on the losing end with loneliness and lack of affection.

4. You attract ghosters

Since you’re into ghosting, you’ll also like other potential ghosters. Because you’ll feel assured without the burdens of commitment or contact for months.

Even when you look for serious commitments, you will attract ghosters and disappoint yourself. It’s not because of karma… rather because you feel attracted towards ghosting characteristics.

5. You’re always second-guessing

Even when you find a perfectly healthy relationship, you’ll always doubt it.

It becomes a relationship pattern and old thoughts resurface in your new relationships. You might feel troubled in long-term relationships and fail to build trust, which is the founding block of a relationship.

Are you a ghoster and want some other way out? Check out these…

Alternatives to Ghosting Someone

If the relationship was healthy and you didn’t feel threatened… then don’t let them feel confused either. Always communicate to end things properly in healthy relationships.

There are different situations based on the type of relationship, like…

1. If it was a short-term casual thing, send them a well-explained text like “Hey xyz, it was a nice time knowing you and I had fun. But I don’t think we’re keeping up well. I hope you find happiness soon.” Don’t give them hope and be direct about your intentions.

2. If it was a long-term serious relationship, choose a place close to their home for face-to-face conversation.

Give them closure and don’t blame them for the breakup. Be gentle and clear during the breakup convo.

In either case, you might get a backlash… unless it’s a life-threatening situation, treat them with kindness and respect.

Wondering how to make a ghost-proof relationship? Here you go…

How to avoid being ghosted?

There’s no hard-and-fast rule to avoid ghosting itself. Instead, look for ways to know your partner’s intentions.

That mostly includes communicating openly and honestly and knowing yourself. Let’s know how…

1. Love yourself

Whether you have a history of being ghosted or you’re just scared of it… remember to love yourself. It doesn’t do anything to prevent ghosting. But it definitely protects you from the aftereffects.

2. Ask questions

Know your partner well but don’t interrogate them. Ask them about their values, boundaries, beliefs regarding relationships.

This information will introduce you to their real self… possibly, more than any direct questionnaire. Make sure you also share your thoughts while knowing theirs to avoid making them uncomfortable.

3. Spill your expectations

Whether you want a short or long-term relationship… whether you want exclusivity or keep it open… communicate your expectations.

Exchange the basic info about your thoughts and emotions. If you guys have mismatching goals and expectations, you dodged a bullet.

4. Learn your attachment styles

Identifying your attachment styles can help you navigate relationship troubles. Your attachment style impacts your relationship and the other person’s responses to you.

If possible, also identify their attachment style for a better evaluation.

5. Plan more dates

If you guys met on social media, move out of the screen. Meet more in person and spend time together.

Though no ghoster gives a clear indication about their intention, they’ll avoid you when they plan to move on. Regular dates also help you keep trust issues at bay.

6. Identify your love language

If you know your love languages, you’ll know exactly how you desire love from them and vice versa. Sometimes, clashing love languages can make you feel unloved and instill doubt.

But when you’re aware, you know their intentions well.

7. Taking slow steps initially

If the relationship is young, don’t expect or plan too far in the future. For instance, if you’re dating for two months, don’t think or talk about marriage yet.

This might scare away your suitor and they might ghost you.

8. Move on from the past

If you’re traumatized from a past relationship or ghosting, try to move on from it. Rekindle your faith in love… but if it’s not possible, seek a therapist. Work out the problems to start afresh.

9. Come clean with issues

Share your past experience with your partner. If they planned to ghost you at all, they might feel bad and confess about their past too.

However, you don’t need pity… share it to bond better with your partner.

10. Check in regularly

It’s a great idea to check in and know one another’s thoughts and feelings. If anyone feels dissatisfied in the relationship, they must speak clearly about it.

Also, plan check-in dates rather than serious conversations.

Even after taking strict steps, the inevitable just happens. Let’s know our next move here…

How to deal with being ghosted?

When the deed is done, you feel the worst, blame and hate yourself for making a fool out of yourself. But was it really your fault?

Unless you have abusive traits, it wasn’t, so love yourselves and prepare to love once again.

Let’s know how to respond to ghosting here…

1. Accept the truth

Since they didn’t give you any valid reason, stop filling in for them. Don’t justify their actions and accept the bitter truth… You’re ghosted.

2. Validate your emotions

And it never feels good because they used you like a rug. If you feel like crying or screaming, then do it. You’re not a sissy or weak for feeling hurt. And if you don’t accept your feelings today, the world will disrespect your feelings every day.

3. Intensify self-love

How do you define love? A tough workout, dancing, singing, painting, or skincare? Whichever feels like your deal, grab it. You need love, so if they can’t give it to you, you can.

4. Avoid reliving past

You possibly had beautiful memories with them. Possibly, you slept together on your bed. These may remind you about the past but don’t let the memories overpower you.

If it’s too much, move in with a friend for a few days to distract yourself.

5. Don’t reach out to them

Want closure? Planning to write a long text about what went wrong? Put this plan aside, because they’ll never bother to reply.

Rather, you’ll feel worse and disrespected more after that.

6. Don’t confine yourself

Many people forget living their life after breakups and ghosting situations. They isolate themselves and fall into a deep depression.

If you have similar thoughts, change and visit the nearest park. Save yourself from this endless dark pit of isolation.

7. Reach out to the right people

Talk to trusted people about what happened. Don’t reach out to blabbermouths… They can only help you spread more rumors about your situation. Talk to trusted loved ones in private places only.

8. Know it’s their fault

Never blame yourself for what happened. It’s their fault to not notify you. You didn’t go wrong anywhere. Whenever your thoughts redirect to self-blame, distract yourself with something.

9. Take professional help

If nothing works out, connect with clinical therapists. Therapy can help you identify any underlying issues like trust issues, self-blaming, or ghosting patterns in your relationship. They can also suggest possible ways to deal with it.

10. Erase them from your memory

You can’t erase them from your mind now, but at least remove them from your devices and accounts. Delete their pictures and chats, unfriend, unfollow, and block them from all sites.

Don’t allow them to reach out to you ever. If they have your house key, change the lock.

Waiting for them to return? Let’s know what happens if it turns into reality here…

What to do if a ghost returns?

When a ghost returns, shed all the emotional baggage on them. If they have proper excuses, consider reconciling (if you both want). But never put your guard down.

When a ghost returns – aka haunting – and demands to reconcile, your decision depends on you. You can try to talk about the hurting feelings, release it from your chest and ask for closure.

State how you felt straight at their face, otherwise they’ll think it’s alright to treat you that way.

If you feel their reasons are justified and want to take them back… go ahead. However, keep an eye out for red flags. Are they around because nobody’s available? Are they still not ready to commit?

If they’re unsure, you’re better off without a ghost. 

Sometimes, ghosting becomes an important step, so let’s learn this art here…

How to ghost someone?

Sometimes, you’re in a pickle and ghosting becomes your last resort. If your life is in trouble, you aren’t answerable to society’s judgment. It might be when you’re in an abusive relationship or feel threatened.

Let’s learn the art here…

1. Confirm your feelings

Remember, you can’t return to old times if you ghost them. This is a one-way route so ponder on it properly. Think about a life without them… are you comfy and happy in that thought?

List out the reasons for ghosting and think a little harder.

2. Pull away slowly

Take your time with distancing… Sudden ghosting may worry others. For instance, stop asking about their day, avoid replying to their texts. Or if they send a chain of texts, respond to one text alone.

If they share posts on social media, don’t respond to those either. They’ll initially think you’re busy and you can smoothly ghost them.

3. Steady your heart

Never respond if you made up your mind… there’s no turning point unless you change your mind. If you want to get away, be consistent.

For instance, if you know they’re sick, hold back from rushing to their side. Prioritize yourself in this situation and hope for a better future.

4. Block them from everywhere

Whether it’s social media, your contact list, or your home, block them.

If they know your rented apartment address, move out. If it’s your permanent address, change the locks even if you didn’t get them keys.

5. Brace for retorts

Ghosting is always a bad way to get away from relationships. If your partner was abusive, it’s completely understandable.

However, they’ll be upset and react real hard. So, brace yourself with some answers and safety measures. Try living with your parents or a friend to avoid any physical harm.

Curious when it’s ethical to ghost? Come on, follow me…

When it is OK to ghost someone?

Sometimes, your situation might be too dangerous to stay behind in a relationship… Other times the issue might be too vague.

But if you think it’s time to call it off but can’t go for a normal breakup, it is OK. Here are some of the instances…

1. You never saw one another in real-life

If your tinder date doesn’t ever ask you out or they refuse your invitations, you don’t owe them anything. On dating sites, many people begin talking but never meet up.

It ends there… nobody reaches out… ghosting is fine in this situation because neither cares.  

2. The reasons are too harsh

If you know that you both have no future and share no common grounds… it’s better to be a ghost.

For instance, your taste in music doesn’t match or you don’t vibe well. It’s not particularly a flaw, but if you spell it out… It sounds too harsh.

3. Your intentions were always clear

Sometimes you clearly communicate that you wanna date casually. People accept that initially and then demand exclusivity later. It’s kind of a breach of relationship rules.

You may ghost them, however, it’s better to convey your reasons. After all, ghosting isn’t the best way to end things.

4. They are dishonest

If you found any loophole in the conversation, know that they’re a shady person. You can’t communicate honestly with a deceitful person. They’ll usually gaslight you and try getting away.

Don’t ignore such toxic traits, else you might be an emotional cruelty victim. Ghost them to keep yourself safe and sound.

5. Your instincts are strong

If your instincts say something is off or that they’re not a safe person… it’s best to ghost them for your safety. However, if the other person pleads for another chance… don’t let them.

They had one chance and didn’t cherish it… you can’t expect them to do wonders any more.

6. They’re not serious

If they show inconsistency in their communication patterns, it’s obvious they aren’t interested. Let’s not waste time or hit them up.

Ghost such people and look for better partners online. Fight your urge to ask them to justify themselves.

7. They’re aggressive

If they made you feel unsafe on their watch, that sounds like abusive traits. Don’t allow them any more chances to meet you or contact you. Retreat discreetly and return to safe grounds.

Never argue over their aggressive behaviors because it’s unsafe. In this position, ghosting isn’t cowardly, it’s an empowering and clever move.

8. They won’t let you go

You had the breakup convo, but they still don’t leave you alone? If they can’t take the hint and blow your phone with messages and calls, ghosting is your ideal choice.

Well, what other choice do they leave you anyway?

9. You feel used

If you think this person catches up only when they’re out of cash or company… get rid of that bloodsucker. Respectfully ask them to stay away and not ask you for favors.

However, ghosting is your only choice if they don’t understand your feelings.

10. They’re catfishing

Catfishing is a major thing in dating apps. People steal pictures and other info from real people and pose to be another person.

Usually, a catfish fills their profile with believable facts, however, they’ll never try to meet you in person or video call you. Your relationship stays put in the texting phase.

Immediately ghost them before they harm you in some manner.

But sometimes ghosting isn’t the right choice, because they are the…

Types of people you just can’t ghost

Sometimes you mustn’t ghost some people because they don’t deserve it… or they have better connections. You might end up embarrassing yourself in front of family and friends. Here are a few types…

1. The long-term partner

A serious partner knows everything about your life. You can’t run away from them without a proper closure.

They might have your family’s contacts too… so there are several ways to find out about it. It’s better to have a mature discussion rather than ghosting them.

2. The one with mutual friends

If your partner and you have lots of mutual friends… every mutual friend is their way to find your whereabouts. It’s impossible unless you keep all of your friends out of the loop.

Moreover, once they start enquiring, it will entangle your friends. Your friends will ask you whenever they find you whether it’s a workplace or at the market.

Try to give them closure once you’re away so they don’t entangle your friends.

3. The ill-tempered one

This kind of person might go to extremely uncomfortable lengths. They might harm you or your loved ones to know about your whereabouts.

They won’t even listen to you, so it’s better to get away to a safe place before you talk to them.

4. The possessive one

Possessive partners are usually jealous and have hyperactive instincts. The moment you begin the slow withdrawal, they’ll instantly notice you.

They will hunt you before you successfully ghost them. So just break the word directly rather than beating around the bush.

5. The argumentative one

If your partner easily gets angry at the slightest thing, ghosting will trigger their impulsiveness. They’ll get angry and do something worse impulsively.

To avoid it, send them an apologetic breakup text and take the blame. Don’t get into details because it’ll worsen the situation.

Since ghosting isn’t the best thing to do to anyone, follow these…

Dos and Don’ts for ghosting someone

Even when you ghost someone, follow some rules. Some that will help you prevent hurting others and yourself. It’s not that you owe them anything, however, if it’s possible, why not end on a good note?

Follow these for smooth ghosting…

1. Don’t delay the process

If this is a short-term thing… like you know them for a few weeks… make it quick. The more you delay it, the more they’ll feel being led on.

When you know it won’t work, don’t even force it… and it’s okay to be quick.

2. Communicate suitably depending on the relationship

If you were consistently in touch, it’s best you clarify things. For instance, if it was more than a month, come clean over texts.

And if you dated them more than four months, you owe them a respectful breakup and closure. Talk to them in person and be kind because it’s a huge blow.

3. Be honest, gentle, and quick

Keep the conversation honest, gentle, and quite short. Avoid the details because there are landmines everywhere. Definitely, never hurt them intentionally.

Of course, the other person won’t take it lightly. Of course, they’ll react but you don’t get back at them meanly.

4. Fence up properly

Set some boundaries beforehand like… never reach out to them. Whether they’re sick or you’re in trouble, never text or call them. Don’t ask them to be friends or expect them to catch up.

Such gestures will make them feel anxious. They’ll wait for when you’ll change your mind and hope for a chance (breadcrumbing). Don’t reply if they reach out either.

5. Lie but don’t be outrageous

If you don’t want to hurt their feelings, you may lie. Take the blame on yourself like you got back with your ex or your parents fixed your engagement.

However, don’t lie outrageously… like your own or a loved one’s death. They might never get over your death, so keep the lies believable.

This might not be enough to answer your thoughts… so, let’s check some…


Ghosting is a relatively touchy topic… Some feel it’s the worst possible thing in dating…. Others can’t help but do it because of their circumstances. To clear the buzz about ghosting in your mind, find more info over here…

1. Why does ghosting happen so often in the dating world?

In the past, people usually dated with marriage in mind. But nowadays, dating trends have changed drastically. There are many types of relationships – serious and casual ones.

Different people have different thoughts about commitment. Many people date to get rid of boredom and many want to socialize only.

Also, ghosting online doesn’t have many consequences. So, people do it more frequently when they only want to play around.

Plus, some people have difficulties choosing from so many people available on dating apps. So, whenever a relationship doesn’t work favorably, people move on to the next one.

2. What personality traits cause people to ghost others?

None honestly!

There are no specific personality traits of ghosters. Even a decent person ghosts others because communication and confrontation are hard.

It’s based more on a person’s communication capabilities and perception of socially acceptable actions.

3. Can being ghosted activate the same pathways in your brain as physical pain?

Both physical and emotional pain triggers the same nerves in the brain. Medically reviewed research shows that rejection and bodily pain are equivalent to the human body.

This is because it triggers the same brain portion. Many studies showed that painkillers can help heal emotional pain too.

A word from ThePleasantRelationship

Ghosting is the easiest way to retreat from a relationship. People take advantage of the modern dating idea quite regularly. However, unless you’re stuck and in danger, don’t opt for ghosting. 

It hurts both you and your partner. Take deep breaths and think again, do people deserve it? Do you deserve it? Use honest communication to convey your opinion on your relationship. 

However, if you were ghosted, remember that it was never your fault. Though it is against what I mentioned above, only for your own peace, reach out to communicate that this is the end and that you won’t wait for them anymore.

They might not give you closure, but at least, you’ll get it off your mind.