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40 Signs your Ex is Never Coming Back (Learn when to give up!)

40 Signs your Ex is Never Coming Back (Learn when to give up!)

Updated on Sep 07, 2022

Reviewed by Julianne Cantarella, MSW, LSW , Certified Relationship Coach

40 Signs Your Ex is Never Coming Back - Signs He Will Never Come Back

Needless to say, breakups are painful. Especially, if you were in a long-term relationship. Whether you initiated the split or got dumped by your partner, it takes time to move on.

And now if you are wishing you could have dealt with the situation differently, it’s perfectly normal.

There are genuine good signs your ex will eventually come back! But if you want to have a fresh start with your ex you should consider the chances.

What if they are not interested to come back? We are giving here REAL Signs your Ex is Never Coming Back. 

Read this article to know if you have seen any of these red flags. After that, it’s your decision whether you want to wait for your ex or not. ☺

20 Signs He Will Never Come Back
20 Signs He Will Never Come Back
20 Signs She Will Never Come Back
20 Signs She Will Never Come Back

40 Signs your Ex is Never Coming Back

So, you want to be sure if your ex is coming back or not? We will give 40 valid signs, 20 for the girls and 20 for the guys. Check this list to know if your ex is never coming back!

20 Signs He Will Never Come Back (For the girls)

Sometimes couples do come back after a break up forgetting their past mistakes and bond together really well. But sometimes a breakup is a permanent chapter in your life. 

The biggest advice we can give you is to look for signs. If your ex-boyfriend wants to come back he will surely give you the hint!

Here are 20 signs your ex-boyfriend will never come back to you.

1. He doesn’t start a conversation 

Is it you who always initiates a conversation after the breakup? Maybe you are the one who sends a text and he just replies.

This is a pretty good sign that he has moved on. He is not attracted towards you and the faster you realize this, the better for you! 

2. You have been friend-zoned by him

After the breakup sometimes the couples decide to stay in touch and just be friends. This often allows the post-split life to be less traumatic for both partners.

But if it was your ex’s idea in the first place to become friends, he probably gave you a clear signal – he wants to move on.

If you have been friend-zoned by your ex, don’t raise your hopes anymore. In the end, only you will be hurt if you are not reading this sign seriously. 

3. He had started dating without informing you

If you and your ex are on friendly terms, it would be expected that you share what’s going on in your lives.

There’s no reason now why you should hide your dating life! If he is still into you he would talk about his new date to make you feel jealous.

But if you come to know from someone else that your ex is dating it clearly means he is avoiding you.

Your ex-boyfriend wants to hide his love life from you in case you are jealous or offended. He does not want drama and wants to keep his life private. This is a strong sign indeed. 

4. He is not interested if you are seeing someone

If you are on talking terms with your ex, you can inform him that you are seeing someone just to check his reaction.

If he is eager to know about the details maybe because he’s still interested in you and the information made him jealous.

But if he doesn’t care or even worse he congratulates you, take this as a signal that he is never coming back. 

5. You have a strong feeling that he is not into you anymore

Women are said to have a strong gut feeling. If you feel intuitive that he has no feelings for you anymore then most probably it’s true.

Don’t ignore the hunch. The more you will want him to come back the more you will torture yourself emotionally. 

6. He blocks you on social media

Nowadays people can stay in touch no matter what. Even we accept friend requests from complete strangers on social media.

But if your ex has unfollowed or blocked your social media accounts take it as a sign he is never coming back to you. 

7. He has severed all contacts with you

If your ex has not only blocked you on social media but completely severed all contacts with you it means he is least bothered about you.

When you see your ex not replying to your texts, not receiving your calls, and avoiding you at parties it’s a big sign to move on. 

8. He is avoiding your friends and family

When you were a couple you must have known each other’s friends and family members. There is no reason to not keep in touch with them.

But if your family or friends tell you that he is avoiding them deliberately it’s obviously for a reason. He has decided to eliminate you from his life.

Accept this as a sure sign and get busy in your life.  

9. He has asked your mutual friends to not mention you in front of him

If your close mutual friends inform you that your ex has asked them to not mention you, then take it as a serious sign.

He is not interested in you anymore. It’s time for you to find someone else. 

10. He has informed you that he is moving on

If your ex-boyfriend personally informed you he is seeing someone, he just politely made it clear that he has no feelings for you. Yes, that’s right! 

11. He returns all your stuff

You would likely have some of his stuff as he would have some of yours. From gifts to clothes and other stuff you must have each other’s things.

If your ex still longs for you he would want to keep your stuff with him as a fond memory.

In that case, you can think he might be hoping to have you back again. But if he returns your things or asks you to collect them it’s a strong signal he doesn’t want to come back again. 

12. He is cold and indifferent towards you

Men usually show their feelings if they have any. After the break up if he still admires you secretly he would show his emotions through his words and body language.

Instead, if he keeps little or no touch, paying no attention towards you, there’s a good chance he has lost interest in you. 

13. He is moving out of the city

If your ex is distancing himself from you he is doing it on purpose. And if he has moved out of the city don’t wait for him because he has made a conscious decision to go away from you. 

14. He seems to be enjoying his life

Does it seem to you that your ex-boyfriend is enjoying his life after break up? You can wait for a month or two to see if he sulks back to sorrow and despair.

But if you find him continuing the joy ride, going out with friends, traveling, and actively dating women it’s time to forget him. He is never coming back!

15. He is avoiding eye contact

When you were in a relationship you must have had so many unspoken conversations through your eyes. Maybe you could just read his thoughts looking at his eyes.

But if he is avoiding any eye contact now, most probably he is not willing to have that kind of bonding with you again.

He wants to hide his thoughts and he certainly has no feelings for you. In that case, the best advice for you is to forget him!

16. He has not discussed with any mutual friend about you 

If your mutual friends tell you that he never mentions you in front of them it’s most likely he has closed your chapter. Stop trying to win him back. Instead, focus on your wellbeing. 

17. He has told that he never loved you

Wait a sec! Has he confessed after the breakup that he was never into you? Then don’t take his words lightly.

For if he said he never loved you that means exactly so! Don’t try interpreting it in your way. Digest the harsh truth and move forward. 

18. He has refused to get back together

After the break up did he tell you that he will not come back, no matter what! Then he had revealed his true intentions.

Don’t try to patch up with him because that would mean compromising on your self-worth. Please take it as the final word and start searching for a new lover. 

19. He makes silly excuses if you ask him to meet 

If your ex-boyfriend isn’t agreeing to meet you, take it as a crucial sign that he is never coming back. No one can be so busy that they can never make out their time for a meet-up.

If he is making silly excuses and refusing it’s because you are not on his priority list. Simple!

20. He had gone through multiple breakups before you 

If he has been into casual flings and had several breakups in his life before you it just means he is not looking for a serious relationship in the first place.

Don’t try to persuade him. He is the “Casanova” type who has lost his interest in you.  

20 Signs She Will Never Come Back (For the guys)

If you are looking for some of the good signs your girl will come back to you after the breakup, that’s perfectly normal!

But whether she is also interested in you is a BIG question. Isn’t it a good idea to understand her intentions?

Here are 20 signs your ex-girlfriend will never come back to you.

1. She is in a serious love affair

A woman rarely enters a serious love affair halfheartedly. If you find your ex-girlfriend is in a committed relationship with someone else it just means she is serious about him.

Don’t wait for her because she has moved on. Even if she is in touch with you it’s because she considers you nothing more than a friend. She isn’t coming back!

2. She hates you

If a woman hates you she simply hates you. There is no other meaning to her hate story. Don’t try finding one.

The best solution for you is to just RUN away from her. As fast as you can, as far as you can manage!

3. She is making fun of you in public 

So, your ex-girlfriend is making fun of you in front of your mutual friends? Worse still, she is posting hilarious (READ spiteful) messages about you on social media.

Don’t think she is depressed and start feeling sorry for her. She has no interest in you other than sharing memes and cracking jokes about you to pull you down. 

4. She has removed all your photos from her social media

If your ex-girlfriend has removed all those photos of both of you in happier times it is a clear sign she is making space in her life. Certainly not for you, but someone else. 

5. She has blocked you on social media

Now, this doesn’t even need an explanation. Does it? If she has blocked you on social media networks, it simply means she doesn’t want you in her life.

She wants to hide her social media posts on purpose. Maybe she is already seeing someone and she doesn’t want you to pry on her private life.  

6. Her family is cold or even rude towards you

If you shared a good rapport with her family you can check their reaction towards you now. Are they behaving as usual or have they turned cold towards you?

Worse still, have they been rude to you? If that is the situation, undoubtedly your ex has turned her family against you. Give up the hope of her coming back!

7. She likes to change her boyfriends 

Some women like to change their boyfriends fast. If she has replaced someone with you, understandably, she has replaced you with someone.

Don’t wait for her because she has lost interest in you. 

8. She has returned all your gifts 

If she has returned all your gifts it means she is making space for new love. She wants to wipe you out from her memory. Take it as a strong sign and stop waiting for her. 

9. She is partying around

If she is partying around after the breakup you can think she is miserable without you and so wants to forget the pain.

But if she’s having fun even after a month of the breakup means she is happy without you. That’s a hard one to digest! But honestly, there is no way she is coming back!

10. She is dressing even better these days

After the breakup are you in touch with her, at least on social media? Watch how she’s dressing up nowadays.

If she is going places, wearing better clothes than she usually wears, it could mean she has moved on.

Most likely, she has entered the dating zone again. In that case, waiting for her would be only a waste of your time!

11. She has told you not to bother her anymore

After the break up if you are missing her, it’s quite normal for you to expect she would be missing you too! But look for the signs again.

Did she show you the dead-end? If your ex has told you on your face she is never coming back then take it seriously. She won’t because she had told you so!

12. She is focusing on personal growth 

Is she nowadays more inclined towards personal development? She wants to evolve personally, professionally, and maybe spiritually also.

The woman she will evolve into will be a completely different person. Don’t wait for her because she isn’t coming back. 

13. She has adopted a new lifestyle

If your ex-girlfriend has changed her lifestyle she won’t remain the person you knew. If she is quitting her old ways and habits, pretty soon the two of you will be miles apart in your thoughts and behavior.

Wish her well and move on. No point wishing she will come back to you again! 

14. She has moved on with her new boyfriend 

If she is living-in with another man it just means she has replaced you. Don’t think it’s just a rebound relationship to heal her hurt from the breakup.

She could have moved on with this man for sex or because she is in love with him. Don’t even try to find the why. If she is sleeping with another man it’s time to look for a new partner. 

15. She has friend-zoned you

If she has declared you as a friend in public that means she has friend-zoned you. Don’t wait for this girl, she will never come back. 

16. She is not taking your calls or answering your texts 

She isn’t replying to your texts or returning your calls? If she doesn’t want to keep in contact rule out the option of her coming back!

That’s a big sign she is not interested in you. Your girl is never coming back!

17. She is not curious about you

After the breakup have you started seeing someone? Maybe out of boredom or you want to make her feel jealous? See how she reacts to your new dating life.

If she wants to return she will show some form of frustration in front of you or your mutual friends. But if she is showing no signs of curiosity what is the chance that she can return? Probably zero. 

18. She has plainly refused to get back together 

Maybe you have tried the No-contact Rule with her.

But did that help? If she tells you that she isn’t coming back don’t take it lightly. Especially, if she said that seriously. 

Not dramatically right after the breakup! But later when things have cooled down and she flatly refused to come back she really meant it. Don’t wait for a girl who has cleared her intentions.

19. She never cared for you much 

Answer this honestly. Did your ex-girlfriend care for you much when the two of you were a couple?

If she never cared for you then why will she care for you now? She is gone from your life for the better!

20. She has told that she never loved you

This is a sure sign! After the breakup, if she confessed to you that she never loved you she has spilled the truth! Don’t even think she lied to make you sad or angry.

If someone tells you they don’t love you it means they are telling you the truth. Accept it and forget her. You deserve better! 

10 Obvious signs your ex doesn’t want you back 

So, if you have read till this you have got a pretty clear picture of your situation. It’s constant torture to keep thinking if your ex will come back or not.

To help you out we have given you an exhaustive list. But do you still want to be with your ex? We understand it’s a tough situation for you.

But you can’t keep waiting and wasting your life for someone who isn’t coming back. 

Every relationship is different but still we would share 10 obvious signs your ex doesn’t want you back.

Here are 10 sure-shot signs that your ex doesn’t want you back (the two of you will NEVER COME BACK together)

1. They have trust issues

If your ex always suspected you of having an affair with someone else, they have ended the relationship purposely.

If you were innocent still they didn’t believe you, why do you think they will want you back? They feel you are the guilty one and they are happy to dump you from their life! (And seriously, do you want to spend your life with a person with such trust issues? 

2. The spark was gone from your relationship 

Be honest. Did you feel the spark was gone from your relationship? Maybe you were attracted to your ex but did he/she show any special attention to you?

If you were lonely and unloved while in the relationship then the romance died ages ago!  It’s impractical to wait for your ex. THEY DON’T WANT YOU BACK. 

3. It was always about them and not you

When you were a couple was it always about your ex? If your ex always prioritized themselves, you were not important to them.

EVER. If you had always adjusted with this person your relationship was not based on solid ground. They do not want you back for sure. The question is – Do you still want them in your life?

4. Your ex has told they don’t find you sexy enough

Physical attraction is a strong parameter in romantic relationships. It’s not all emotions and feelings. If your ex has mentioned they don’t find you attractive enough they meant that.

Now that you have had a breakup they have no reasons to want you back.

Do you want to compromise with your self-respect and wait for them?

5. Your ex misbehaved with you all the time

If your ex was mean towards you while you were a couple there is no point raising hopes for them. First of all, you don’t matter to them! But most importantly, it’s not a healthy relationship at all! 

6. Your ex has decided to get married

If you’ve heard your ex is getting married don’t you think this is an obvious sign? Albeit, they have moved ahead!

Or are you still raising your hopes that at the last moment they will dump their partner and come running to you? Like we see in Hollywood movies! But it never happens in real life. Get a grip!

7. Your ex was the one who wanted the breakup 

Who initiated the breakup – you or your ex? If it was them who wanted the breakup there is every reason they have planned it ages ago.

Your ex had decided a life without you and that’s why they wanted the breakup!

8. Your ex has told you many times to move on 

After the breakup, if your ex has insisted you many times to move on, it means they have been serious.

If your ex keeps telling you should not wait for them there is no reason why you should! 

9. Your ex is bad-mouthing about you

Breakups are hard and can bring out the ugly side of a person. But there is a limit! If your ex continuously insults you in public, calling names, lying about you, and spreading hate, it’s not a good sign.

Forget getting them back, think how you can save your neck! For they can easily destroy your image and make you project as the “bad guy” in front of everyone.

Don’t mistake their aggressiveness as passionate love. Is it worth accepting such a toxic person?

10. You have been trying to get back your ex-boyfriend/ ex-girlfriend for a long time

Honestly, there is no time limit on when your ex can come back. A lot of people keep waiting for their ex for a huge amount of time. But do you want to keep waiting forever?

Exes do reunite sometimes in a few weeks, months, or even years. But you have to notice any positive signal from your ex.

If you have been waiting a long-long time for your ex, be more practical. Look for any reasons why they can come back. Just hoping and wishing never helped anyone!

If you have already waited for a considerable time, ponder if anything positive is growing between the two of you. If not, you have already wasted a lot of your time. Your ex doesn’t want you back. 

What to do when you know your ex is not coming back

It’s difficult but when you are sure your ex isn’t coming back, you must move on because life doesn’t wait for anyone! Do these steps to move fast when you know they are not coming back to you.

1. Tackle your life

It’s your life after all! You can’t allow someone to mess it up for a long time. Yes, it’s tough to forget true love but time heals almost everything.

Don’t fall into the trap of misery and victimhood. Instead, organize your life.

Set goals, take action, prioritize everything in your life. As your energy will be consumed in organizing stuff going on in your life, you will get less time to moan over your ex. Simply put, keep busy!

2. Try new things

It’s your time now to explore the world! Go to places, try out different food, attend different kinds of events, join a yoga class, wear that sexy outfit, learn a language or make new friends.

As you do new things you will be amazed to see a change in your attitude. Your heartache will go away even faster than you could have imagined!

3. Talk with friends

Don’t keep your emotions to yourself. Share it with your friends so that they can help you heal. Spend time with your loved ones. After a period of time, you will heal mentally and emotionally.

Honestly, time heals even the deepest wounds! Eventually, you will forget your ex and make a fresh start.

4. Take professional help 

If you can’t forget and continuously think about your ex, it is time to take advice from a relationship expert. Book a therapy session if you must. It’s wrong to keep the hurt within you.

If your friends and family have not been successful to make you forget your ex, don’t hesitate to visit a therapist.

5. Realize that they aren’t coming back

Instead of holding the faint hope of your ex returning to you, convince your mind that they are not coming back. The best person to counsel you is you.

Stop dreaming about your ex and analyze the reality of your situation. Holding a false hope however comforting will bring more pain.

Forget the chapter by thinking whatever has happened is for your good. Forgive your ex. Do not keep any grudges.

Parting Thoughts

Always take a positive lesson from every bad chapter of your life! Even if your ex isn’t coming back there must be something good that person has taught you!

Maybe from now on, you will be more careful choosing your partner. Or perhaps you have identified your faults. It could be that you need to change your attitude or temper or your controlling nature!

Reflect on your past relationship and learn the lessons. It’s only human to feel sad or angry even.

But don’t dwell in these negative emotions for long! Take responsibility for your life and let go of what cannot be changed.

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