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40+ Signs He Doesn’t Want Anyone Else to Have You

40+ Signs He Doesn’t Want Anyone Else to Have You

Updated on May 27, 2022 | Published on Jan 18, 2022

Reviewed by Julianne Cantarella, MSW, LSW , Certified Relationship Coach

40+ Signs He Doesn't Want Anyone Else to Have You

Have you been seeing some signs he doesn’t want anyone else to have you? But he also doesn’t say that he wants to commit to a long-term relationship with you?

Well, it can be hard to get a man to open up about his feelings.

If you start asking him how he feels about you, he may not give you an instant answer.

Don’t worry! Men’s actions might sometimes speak louder than their words.

Your partner may not tell you that he can’t imagine his life without you, but he will make it clear that he doesn’t want anybody else to have you.

Here are 40+ obvious signs that your partner wants all of you to himself.

40+ Signs He Doesn't Want Anyone Else to Have You
40+ Signs He Doesn’t Want Anyone Else to Have You

40+ Sure Signs He Doesn’t Want Anyone Else to Have You 

Does your boyfriend act weirdly when you are around someone else? 

He makes a fuss but never tells you directly that you are only mine.

Some guys are very restrictive when it comes to expressing their feelings. 

However, there is another way to find out what he actually is by identifying his actions.

Well, well, well!

We have curated more than 40 signs to find out he doesn’t want anyone else to have you. 

So, let’s roll.

1. He treats you like a queen to make you feel special 

At the end of the day, actions speak louder than words.

Instead of saying he wants you, he shows it by his actions.

He may not drop down on one knee and ask you to be his girlfriend but he shows his love in a different way.

He lavishes you with texts, presents, attention, and possibly even time.

If you’re honest with yourself, this can sometimes feel excessive as if he’s love bombing you.

Guys will sometimes turn to be overly nice in the hopes of winning women over.

Perhaps he treats you like a queen out of fear that you’ll turn your head and be carried away by another charming prince.

2. He remembers all the little details about you

What better method to differentiate himself than to make you feel as if he actually understands you?

It’s not always simple to show others how invested we are in what they say.

One way he might show this is by repeating things you’ve said in the past, whether it’s a casual remark or a poignant childhood memory.

Remembering the small details is his way of saying, “Your words have worth to me.”

3. He asks about your previous relationships

Imagine a spy scouting the perimeter.

His interest in your past relationships is most likely motivated by more than just curiosity.

He’s probably doing it because he wants to learn about what you look for in a person in a relationship.

Imagine this: he may lack self-confidence and be worried about how he would fare as a love partner.

Without revealing his cards, he inquires about your previous relationships in order to have a thorough understanding of what you’re searching for in a man.

Hopefully, he’ll be able to piece together enough information to be the man you’re looking for.

4. He is emotionally attached to you

Some men are notoriously tough to open up to.

Men’s love expressions aren’t limited to telling you openly that he likes you.

Maybe he’s still unsure about how he feels, or he just wants to keep his feelings to himself for a little while longer.

Regardless of how he feels, his affection will undoubtedly flow over into other areas.

For example, you may notice that he opens up to you more than he does to others.

He discusses his fears as well as his interests.

You notice a depth in him that most people don’t.

For all you know, this could be his way to draw you in closer.

5. He tries hard in bed to keep you around

Have you ever heard the saying “leave them wanting more?”

All of these great sex moves could be a ploy to keep you around for a longer period of time.

He doesn’t want you to forget him as soon as you leave the bedroom, so he offers you something to think about.

After all, how could you think about someone else when you’re still recovering from a particularly hot session?

He may not appear to be possessive, yet this could be one of the ways he shows you where you belong with him.

6. He always makes new plans with you 

Do you ever have the impression that he is attempting to fill your calendar with nothing but him?

He calls you every time you have a day off from work, a free night or weekend, and asks if you’re available.

Free to go out to eat, see a movie, go hiking or bowling, or do a million other activities.

His desire to be with you is sweet but the fact that he doesn’t treat it like a true date is troubling.

When he’s definitely creating plan after plan with you, it’s best to try to help draw out his true feelings; perhaps he doesn’t even realize what he truly feels.

7. He protects you from all negative situation

Men are naturally protective towards women.

According to a study published in the journal Physiology & Behavior, male testosterone helps them feel protective of their partner’s safety and well-being.

Is your man there to protect you? Does he protect you not only from physical injury but also from any negative scenario that may arise?

Congratulations! This is a clear sign that he loves you and does not want you to see anybody else.

There’s a fascinating new concept in relationship psychology that’s gaining a lot of attention right now. It gets to the heart of the riddle of why men fall in love and with whom they fall in love.

8. He asks about is there any new guys in your life

Whenever a new guy enters your life, whether it’s a classmate who asks for your number or a new coworker who invites you out to dine, he’s the first to inquire.

He’s extremely interested in any new guy who emerges on your buddy list or phone contacts and he wants to know everything about him (and of course, how you feel about him).

When he does this, it’s a clear sign that he believes he should already be your boyfriend but doesn’t know how to cross that line for some reasons.

Instead he has to worry that every new guy in your life would assume you’re single and ready to mingle with you.

9. He is always the first to come to your help

There’s no better way to convince someone that you’re their soulmate than to always be the first to help them when they need it.

He knows that because you’re single (and amazing), you’ll have plenty of males eager to help you whenever you need it and he can’t allow that to happen.

As a result, he must always be first.

If he is constantly trying to assist you, it is clear that he does not want anyone else to obtain your approval and attention.

10. He gets bothered when you go out with someone else

So you went on a date with someone else.

You did nothing wrong — you’re single and available, regardless of how much “he” likes you.

And he realizes he can’t say anything terrible because he isn’t technically your boyfriend (even though he acts like it half the time).

However, this does not mean he will be indifferent about it.

When you’re around him, you’ll see him quietly seething, itching to tell you what’s on his mind despite the fact that he has no right to do so.

He’ll try to learn everything he can about the other guy including asking your friends about him but at the end of the day. 

And he realizes that if he wants you to stop dating other people, he has to make a serious move on you for himself.

11. He has been hurt in the past relationships

He acts like a boyfriend, talks like a boyfriend and feels like a boyfriend but you can’t figure out why he won’t take the first step to take the relationship to the next level.

It’s as if he likes you but doesn’t truly like you but he also acts as if no one else has the right to ask you out. So, what exactly is going on?

It’s possible that he’s been hurt by previous girlfriends in the past.

He may have been through something really traumatic and emotionally draining and now he is having difficulty committing to a committed relationship, despite the fact that he desires it.

Walk him through these memories and help him in facing them again.

If you truly feel that he would make a great partner then help him realize you want him to be that man for you.

12. He gets surprised when you make plans without him

When you answer, “I can’t, I have plans,” he’s truly surprised.

There are times when he believes you and him are already a couple.

But you two never got fully official, he’s still taken aback anytime he’s forced to remember that you have a life that has nothing to do with him, and he has no right to inquire about it.

This surprise shows that he wishes there was “more” between you and that he does not want anyone else to have you or your time.

13. He listens to your needs carefully

One clear sign that your partner wants you all to himself is that he listens carefully and listens to your requirements. He makes an effort to look after you and respects your requests.

In casual relationships, we tend to prioritize our own demands while ignoring our partners’ requests and desires.

If the relationship fails, it is not the end of the world for him because he may be dating other women or has them lined up on the sidelines.

If your man values you in his life, he will follow his promises and show up to help and take attention to the things you appreciate and make them a reality.

He will even put some of your wants before his own at times.

If you’re exhausted after a long day at work and need some alone time, he’ll make sure you get it. He’ll show you how much he cares. 

He will remember your tastes and make them a reality, such as running you a bath, giving you your favorite dessert, taking you on your favorite hike, or helping you in relaxing.

14. He reaches out to you after having a fight

Every relationship will have conflicts and fights.

There will be many misunderstandings between you and your man. But if he truly desires you in his life, he would go out of his way to reach out to you and find a solution. And he isn’t going to waste any time in making things right.

If your boyfriend truly desires you in his life, he will not be able to remain distant and silent for long.

Even a few hours will feel overwhelming. Maintaining open communication is important to the relationship’s success. He will not risk losing you.

Following a conflict, he will feel compelled to resolve any concerns that you both share. He will be the one to call or text you to arrange a time to meet and discuss.

He will apologize for any harm caused and will be willing to work with you to make things right.

If he doesn’t want anybody else to have you, he will seek to better understand you and strengthen your relationship.

When he does this, he is suggesting that he is afraid of losing you and does not want to let you go.

15. He gets a little jealous when you are with someone else

Maybe you’d like to test the waters and see where you stand with your man by openly flirting with another man in his company.

A man who is considering ending his relationship with you will not even blink.

If your man desires you in his life, he will wonder and be slightly jealous. He will not want to see you flirting in front of him and will inquire about any other guys in your life, particularly ex-partners.

He’ll be curious to know where he stands with you. When he asks, he may even be a little uncomfortable or awkward.

So, if you find your boyfriend asking questions about any of your exes or male friends and then acting weirdly, it could be because he is comparing himself to them.

He doesn’t want to lose you if he shows signs of jealousy.

Remember to reassure him that he is wanted and loved and that he has nothing to be worried about.

16. He makes time to spend with you often

If your boyfriend is willing to change his plans now and then to be with you, it shows he wants more from you and is eager to commit to you.

A man who wants you all to himself would plan your weekends and ensure that no other prospects try to hit on you or spend time with you.

He will initiate dates more actively and show his desire to spend time with you.

You will never feel like you are suffocating him or violating his personal space because he will express how much he enjoys your time together.

These aren’t questions you’ll be asking yourself.

17. He likes to meet your family and friends

When a man dates you casually, he has no reason to get to know your family and friends.

He is drawn to your physical appearance and personality and he wishes to appreciate you on a limited and specific level.

But if he goes out of his way to get to know your best friends, attend group trips with your friend and wants to meet your family, it’s a clear sign that he wants to be in your life and get to know you better.

If he is willing to go out of his way to get to know and be nice with the people closest to you, he is trying to love all aspects of your life and form a strong long-lasting bond with you. 

He wants you to know that the people who mean something to you mean something to him as well. 

18. He often hangs out with you

A man who wants you completely will make plans to visit you repeatedly. He will arrange your next date and ensure that he is present and involved in your life.

When a man is looking long-term, he will cooperate with you to make plans.

He will encourage you to plan date nights, weekend getaways and travel plans for the future, and he will enjoy discussing them a few months in advance.

He will see you in the future if he wants you in his life. There will be no hesitation or room for doubt.

19. He shares everything with you 

Men aren’t always forthcoming with their emotions. They can be very elusive.

It may take a significant amount of work for them to open up.

You can be certain that your man wants to be close to you if he shows his vulnerable side, expresses painful emotions and lets you see him as he is.

When he isn’t afraid to answer any of your queries, you can typically tell how open he is with you.

He will not try to conceal anything from you. More than anything, he desires to be seen and understood.

If a man feels close to you and good with you, he will believe he has won the game of love. He will not allow anyone else to have you.

20. He feels appreciated by you

Your lover will want to be closer to you if he feels wanted, respected and valued by you. This is usually the difference between him feeling “like” for his spouse and “love” for him.

He will feel like a superhero if you activate his deeply rooted hero instinct. He will be inspired, important, and needed, and he will feel uplifted. 

Any connection he has with you that increases his sense of importance and success as a provider and lover will make him desire you all for himself.

This does not imply that you must play the “damsel in distress.” You can still be a strong and self-sufficient woman.

But he understands that you appreciate it when he steps up and meets a need that only he can meet. It gives him a great sense of satisfaction. 

Instincts are powerful drivers of human behavior and this is especially true for how men approach their relationships.

So, when the hero instinct is triggered, men are more likely to bond and commit to that woman. 

21. He shows his real side in front of you

If a man feels at ease and honest around you, you can be sure he appreciates having you in his life. There is nothing he can pretend to be and no pressure on him to behave in a certain way.

If you notice that he behaves differently around his friends and family than he does around you, this could be a warning flag.

He may be attempting to conceal something from you or acting in a certain manner in order to acquire something from you.

If he trusts you and feels at ease around you and you get to see the real him, he is more likely to want to keep you near.

If he is willing to inform you about any element of his life, even the difficult moments then it’s likely that he is genuine about his feelings for you.

22. He will be there when you need him

When your man understands you need him, he will drop everything to be there for you when you need him the most. He’s not going to make excuses. It’s not going to be a question.

He’ll be there if you need him.

He will not later complain or make you feel bad about it.

It will be clear that he wishes to take on this unique role in your life. That he wants to give you his all.

He’ll be able to identify when anything upsets you and ask you what’s wrong. He will want to help you feel better and will not be afraid to show you how.

He’ll show you that he notices you and cares about you.

23. He gives you consistent attention

If a man starts conversation with you on a regular basis, he most likely wants you in his life.

Interest equals consistency.

Think about anything that you value. You will make time to participate in such activities or persons, no matter what, in comparison to others that are less significant.

If someone is significant to us, we will keep in touch with them on a regular basis so that we are aware of what is going on in their lives.

If you’re important to him, he must be interested in you!

24. He is thoughtful and engaged in you

If you’re talking to a man and his responses are short, vague, and unimaginative, he’s probably not interested in you.

When a man desires to get close to you, he will pay attention to how he interacts with you. He will carefully consider his responses and what he tells you.

The quality of his conversations and texts reveals a great deal about how he thinks about you.

25. He expresses himself openly to you

One clear sign that your man is into you and wants you to feel the same way is when he boasted about what a wonderful, devoted and loving partner he will be.

He will talk about how he will treat a woman properly and then follow through on it.

He will tell you about his best qualities and show them to you.

He will point out how other men act like jerks, liars, cheats, douchebags and narcissists and urge them to act better.

When he tries to show you how he is different and separates himself from “those men,” he is expressing his desire for you.

26. He is kind to you in all areas of life

Does your man insist on paying for everything? 

Will he politely decline your offer to pay for dinner, take him to the movies, or take him out for coffee?

When he is generous with not just his financial resources, but also with his time, attention, and care, it is a clear sign that he is serious about you and does not want anybody else to jump in.

He will go out of his way to impress and indulge you on a regular basis. He will take you to unique locations, experiences, and moments.

It will be a pleasure for him to share what he is capable of.

27. He doesn’t want to commit but he doesn’t want to change the relationship

On the one hand, no matter how many times you ask, he refuses to commit. On the other side, he wants to continue seeing you, meeting up with you on a regular basis, and sleeping with you.

And you’re stuck in the center, helpless and trapped.

Your emotions are clear: you are dissatisfied and desire more. At the same time, you’re afraid of even taking a break from the relationship since he’s a good guy and you don’t want to lose him forever.

If this sounds familiar, you’re in a dangerous situation. It’s possible he’s aware of your situation and is keeping you there so he may continue to reap the benefits of your relationship with minimal effort.

28. He asks about your interest in other guys

Is he trying to change the subject when you start the “exclusive talk”? Or, does he become agitated?

If he does, it shows he isn’t ready or eager to even discuss a relationship. That much is clear.

Is he also asking if you’re still seeing other guys? It gets even worse when you reply “No” and he accuses you of lying.

In any case, you’re in the perilous position of being trapped in a non-committal relationship with a possessive and controlling man.

29. He gets nervous when he heard about your male friends

Have you noticed any negative reaction on his part when you mention your male friends? Is he starting to look nervous, angry, or playing the victim?

If he does, it’s clear that he doesn’t want anyone else to have you. And it’s an odd desire to hear from a man who refuses to commit.

We hope you recognize the poor bargain he’s making you right now, and how he stands to benefit more than you do.

30. He says he is afraid of being alone

This is when he says things like, “I don’t want to be alone,” “I don’t want to lose you,” and other repeated statements of love.

It all sounds lovely, except for the fact that he has yet to commit to you. If that thought makes you angry, you have reason to be.

It’s a good idea to take whatever he says with a grain of salt. It’s possible that he’s saying whatever it takes to keep you around.

Except for the words you’re looking for: To begin an exclusive official relationship.

31. He tries to convince you that our relationship status is correct

Has he ever tried to talk you out of getting exclusive, such as by:

Telling you horror stories about “people he knew” whose marriages were ruined.

Saying “this is better” means that casual and open relationships, such as yours, are better than committed ones.

Using cute cliches such as “Marriage is only a piece of paper” or “Marriage is simply a tool to control us.”

If he has, he is clearly attempting to make the point that committed relationships are harmful and that staying single is good.

He understands what you want but he’s determined to convince you otherwise.

32. He can’t understand why are you so important to him

You just can’t seem to get through to him, no matter how much you tell him about your feelings. It’s as if his huge skull can’t handle the nuance of “I want us to be formal,” and it’s driving you crazy.

There are two possibilities when he doesn’t understand why you value commitment so much.

The first is the best-case scenario: he has no idea why it’s significant. Committing to only one person is an odd concept to him.

The worst-case scenario is that he actually does understand but he’s pretending he doesn’t so you didn’t trouble him about it.

You can’t win either way, and it would be best to start planning your exit strategy now, before it’s too late.

33. He says he doesn’t know what he wants

This is when he makes vague, useless explanations like “I don’t know what I want,” “I simply need time to work things out,” or other obvious delay tactics.

It’s all in an attempt to stop the conversation and get you off his case.

Again, he has no idea what he wants at best. It’s also conceivable that he’s had bad experiences in previous relationships and needs to work things out. It’s understandable if that’s the case.

However, it places you in the same awkward situation. Do you really want to wait years, if not forever while he “works things out?”

34. He is neglectful except when he senses another guy wants you

For lengthy spans of time, you receive no texts or phone calls from him. The majority of the time, you are the one who initiates communication.

Meanwhile, he fails to do his fair share of the work required to keep the relationship strong and pleasant.

That is, until he realizes another guy is interested in you.

Perhaps you mentioned a specific male friend twice a week. Suddenly, he’s messaging and calling again, setting updates and inviting you to meet up.

It’s never a good sign if your partner only pays attention when he thinks he’s about to lose you. That’s a classic sign of a womanizer and I doubt you’d accept it.

35. He pays for the date only when he thinks you’re slipping away

Let’s get started on your dates. When you go out to eat, who normally pays? Is it usually you (or do you split the bill)?

Then if he thinks you’re losing interest in the relationship (or that you’re slipping away), he begins paying for supper.

Not only that but he’s also purchasing you small gifts. And you’ve noticed that he’s only sweet like this after you’ve argued.

If you have the impression that he is attempting to entice you back in, this could be the case. Then, when he realizes you’re “in love with him again,” he begins to ease off.

If you ask me, this is not a nice cycle to be in.

36. You both do not show love at the same time

He does not react to signs of emotion. And it is only when you stop displaying affection that he begins to perform his part. It’s like a repetitive dance that never improves.

As you might expect, it’s yet another sign that he’s unwilling to commit. He’s doing just enough to keep you from leaving him for someone else.

And you will never achieve the level of commitment you desire at this rate.

37. He is very attractive until you are in love with him

When you become angry, he becomes extremely attentive. Every time you blow your top, he might even spoil you rotten. Moments like these show that he does not want to lose you.

Unfortunately, as soon as he’s back in your good graces, he resumes his neglect of you. It’s simply another sign that he’s doing just enough to keep you from breaking up with him.

38. He is only your hero when he is about to lose you

He acts like a true boyfriend at times. You may have even seen him exhibit a few “good husband” traits in the past.

What’s the catch? He only shows these wonderful heroic attributes when he is ready to lose you.

It’s like something he “breaks out in case of emergency,” like when you threaten to break up with him or start seeing someone else.

Yes, it’s all in the hopes that you’ll stay. As with all the previous signals, you can expect him to return to his old ways as soon as he believes he has regained you.

39. He only reaches out after a period of contact

You may have found that giving him the silent treatment is the most effective approach to get him to pay attention to you.

Or you decide to keep him off the grid for a few days and he reaches you in a panic asking whether you’ve been meeting anyone new.

It appears like the more frequently you communicate with him, the more he takes you for granted.

It’s another clue that he’s only interested in doing the absolute minimum to keep you around, and he only reaches out when he suspects you’re doing things behind his back.

40. He doesn’t let the other people meet you

This is one of the most dangerous signs you might ever see. Because yours is an open relationship, he meets other women on a regular basis.

And yet, when you meet other men, he goes crazy and will go to any length to prevent you from doing so:

He begins blackmailing you.

He curses at you in an attempt to scare you, and he threatens to end your relationship.

This is clearly a one-sided relationship, and being in one is never a good thing. No, it will not change on its own. It’s better if you can find the strength to let go of the control freak as soon as possible.

41. The more you love him, the more he hurts you

By the way, this includes affection and attention. The more you put into your relationship with him in terms of time, money and energy, the more he hurts you by neglecting you and taking you for granted.

As a result, the relationship appears to be stuck in a loop. It never gets better, therefore the only way out is down.

What is my advice? It’s best to get off before it goes down.

42. He says he has everything he wants

Finally, he has the audacity to claim that he is happy where he is or that he has all he desires in life. That includes his zero-commitment connection with you.

He’s attempting to trick you into thinking this is the end. You have a non-committal relationship, that’s all he wants and that’s as good as it gets. 

And if you tried to meet your wants by demanding something more committed and exclusive, you’d be the terrible guy for ruining his perfect life.

43. He tells you he doesn’t want a relationship

If you go on a date with a guy and he tells you that he doesn’t want to be in a relationship, it’s important to understand that he actually doesn’t. 

If you continue to date him and look forward to things, you are doing the wrong thing since it will only damage you in the end.

When he refuses to enter into a relationship, you should simply walk away.

44. He often flirts with you 

If a man goes out of his way to flirt with you and continues to give you flirting feelings but does not ask you out, you should simply walk on.

You should be aware that there is something holding him back and that he is not the right person for you.

45. He says he has never been in love

Women are sometimes drawn to a man who claims he has never been in love. Women believe that if they show him love, he would fall in love with them.

But this isn’t correct. This will simply make you look silly and stupid in his presence after he breaks your heart.

46. He often texts you 

There’s a chance that the early texts you get from him go to a lot of other girls as well.

If he’s only texting you but doesn’t have time to see you or make an effort to meet you in person, it’s time to realize he’s simply playing with you.

47. He wants to see where things are going

If a man says he isn’t looking for anything serious but just wants to see where this relationship goes, it’s time to walk away.

You must understand that he may not invest his emotions in you and as a result, you will end up giving him the most which will eventually hurt you.

48. He organizes the date at your or his place

This is a classic sign of a man who does not want to be seen with you in public. He wants to go on dates but only to your home.

This indicates that he is terrified of being caught in public simply because he is influencing the emotions of multiple women at the same time.

49. He always put efforts 

If he never initiates anything, it could be a sign that he is no longer interested in you. Most likely, he’s just having fun with you and joking about passing the time.

This is the biggest turnoff for a woman and a warning sign that the guy isn’t worth it.

The final words

It’s important that you never waste a guy’s time, you deserve to be treated nicely. 

If he doesn’t seem to be putting in much effort with you or trying hard to show you his feelings, he’s probably not that interested and he’s just trying to keep you around for a variety of reasons. 

There’s nothing wrong with casually dating around to see who you connect with and how deep that connection may be.

However, if he’s only occasionally interested in you then he’s probably just looking to keep you around for his own gain.

Take the charge in your hand and decide if you want to be in a relationship with him for long or not.

Sometimes getting confused about women’s desires is natural. If you particularly wish to know what women want from men, then follow the link to know the tips.

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