Is he the one? Or you’re just overthinking?
Seems you have found a man who ticks all your quality checkboxes, but you want to be double sure before approaching him directly.
Well, it’s always better to verify than to return with embarrassment. And that brings you here on this think-piece… brilliant!
However, life is not simple and so isn’t love. But it’s not difficult either.
There’s no one in the world who can give you a foolproof answer to your lingering question. But I can lay out several common signs that will give you some affirmation.
In fact, if you are looking to tie the knot, these signs can act as your guiding angel. If you relate to most signs listed, he’s the one you should marry!
That gave you butterflies, didn’t it? 😉
So, without any further delay, let’s dig in and find out if he is the one!
Is he the one? (Signs for how to know if he’s the one)
This list has 50+ signs to gauge whether the one you are seeing currently, is your “the one” or not! Read it without any biases and do not let your emotions overrule the reality of the matter.
Ready? Let’s roll!
1. You both expect the same things
What can be more fascinating than having a partner who shares the same ideas as you? For example, both of you agree with the idea that both parents are equally responsible for a child’s upbringing.
No no, I am not talking about all aspects of life. That’s not even humanly possible. As individuals, both of you are built differently.
But when it comes to some important decisions about the relationship, about your future, you always find each other on the same page.
You compromise equally. Your priorities are similar. There is mutual agreement as to how you see your relationship five or ten years down the line.
2. He strikes the right balance
You hardly find men who are able to strike an equilibrium between work and love. To fall in love is easier, but to maintain a healthy love life requires wisdom.
Work is important, but what is also important is to balance all of your responsibilities. He may be busy at work but that doesn’t give him the liberty to be emotionally unavailable for you.
He cannot ignore or dismiss you, time and time again, just because he has “work” to do.
If your partner is going through an important phase of life, it’s your responsibility that you prioritize them first.
Everything that matters the most to them should matter to you too. And the same goes for them!
3. He respects your boundaries
Yes, respecting each other’s boundaries is an important aspect of a relationship. Everyone has a defined private space, where you don’t want any external interference.
Whether it is work or family, a healthy relationship requires both partners to share everything.
But that doesn’t necessarily mean letting them into your private space. The right partner will always acknowledge this and never try to break these walls.
4. You trust him to run your chores when needed
He helps you out when needed, in sickness and in health.
He doesn’t hesitate before preparing breakfast for you when you have menstrual cramps…. he doesn’t mind giving you a nice head massage when you have had an exhausting day.
The right person will take a step back when you’re suffering through tough times. They will understand your needs and tend to them immediately.
5. He’s sincere at taking feedback
He did something that deeply hurt you. You talked to him about this and he understands you and admits his faults.
He apologizes and promises to never let it happen again. Sounds like a dreamy guy, right?
He doesn’t take your feedback lightly.
If you see him making quick and positive changes in his lifestyle, just because you wanted him to do so, is a sign that he takes your feedback sincerely.
6. You fight, but not all the way.
Keeping fights private is one thing, and losing control in public is another. You can’t be the reason for your partner’s humiliation or take your bedroom fights in the public eye.
You have to know where to pour your frustration and where to hold back. If there’s something wrong that happened, make sure you discuss it in a place where there’s only the two of you.
Also, too many fights can drive you apart, until one of you becomes so frustrated that you step out of the relationship.
7. He is not a dominant partner
If your person is focused on becoming better with each passing day and also helps you in the same… that’s when you know, you’ve found your better half.
Whatever decisions you make should be mutual, you should have equal contribution in building the relationship. Your partner should not dominate your decisions and choices in life.
He must be committed to grow together… and pull you back up when you fall down.
This person will never be jealous of your success and make sure you’re always motivated to keep thriving through life’s journey.
8. He doesn’t step in your private life
Freedom is a building block of any healthy relationship. Your partner should understand that and also respect your life as an individual.
He doesn’t snap at you for meeting your friends or follows you everywhere. He says, he doesn’t have to be a part of your social circle, at least not each time.
Instead, he is happy about the fact that you are enjoying your weekends with your girlfriends.
9. You’ve survived a long-distance relationship
Some people say long distance never works. But is it true? It may not work in some cases whereas for some people actually stand by the maxim “distance makes the heart grow fonder”.
If you’re truly dedicated to someone, you will remain loyal even if you’re living miles away.
It’s all about loving a person with your whole heart. But the feelings have to be mutual. There will be times when you will have trust issues, and the only solution for this is communication.
Taking time out, especially when you live in different time zones, is also difficult. Making him feel included in your life, with the distance between you is also difficult.
But if you have survived this phase of your life, then what are you waiting for? Just go ahead and put a ring on him, already!
10. He cares about your friends too
He shouldn’t be someone who forces you to cut off from your social circle. Instead, he motivates you to maintain the friendships you’ve built all along.
He never tries to step within your circle and never interferes in your fights. If a friend is dear to you, they naturally become close to him as well.
If he congratulates your friends on their achievements and wishes them on certain special occasions, it says a lot about this man – trust me, he’s a gem, you wouldn’t find a person like him ever.
11. You’re the prettiest (and hottest) girl in the world
Doesn’t matter if you are dressed in rags sweetheart, you’re still the most charming woman to him because he is madly in love with you.
Looks and clothes matter very little when there’s pure love in the heart.
You aren’t worried about your appearance around them. He brings out your inner self without even trying. Do you even need more signs to know if he is the one?
12. Your efforts don’t go to waste
Isn’t it gratifying when someone actually acknowledges your efforts? They notice every little thing you’re doing. You often receive compliments for the way you carry yourself.
Everytime you don a new dress, he never fails to shower you with compliments. That alone, makes all the effort worth it. He notices every single effort that you invest to make him feel better.
He doesn’t get tired of appreciating whenever you do something special, or when you achieve something. Adorable, right?
13. You both are adventurous in bed
Most of us feel shy while sharing our innate fantasies with our partner.
But if you feel that you are absolutely cool while exploring riveting things with your partner, and also conveying every sexual fantasies without hesitation, then you have nothing to be worried about.
You are actually fortunate if you don’t follow the same mechanical routine at bed every night.
Each time you slide in the blanket with him, he wakes you up with a new experience and some thrilling memories that keep you delighted throughout the day!
14. He always brags about you
He has confidence in you, more than you have in yourself, and is always cheering you on to move ahead in life.
Plus, he always brags about your success and doesn’t miss a chance to tell you how proud he is of you.
And when I say he is bragging, I totally mean that he is proud to be your partner. It shows in his behavior and the way he shows you off in his inner circle.
His friends send you congratulatory messages even when you never told them about your success.
15. He sacrifices for you, but doesn’t make noise
Relationships are all about making compromises and not regretting it.
He puts your needs above his own but never goes bragging about it. He makes all the sacrifices in silence.
Yes, it happens when both of you are fighting… you tend to talk about all the disadvantages you’ve borne for them.
It happens to the best of us. But no, not him.
16. He’s chivalrous!
Who’s a chivalrous man? Not the one who’s holding the gate or pulling out the chair ONLY for you… but for all the women out there.
Being chivalrous in the initial days is no big feat. But if he does things exactly as he did in the initial days of the relationship, he is a diamond, sweety!
He cares for tiny-little things that might bother you. He will not be able to see you getting hurt… and so tries all his might to make sure you feel safe and secure.
17. He doesn’t bore you
It’s been years. But you still crave for him… as you did on the first day.
He knows what makes you feel happy and safe. He does not trouble you with his expectations and always takes the lead in making you smile…. he remembers every little thing you’ve said to him. And brings you the happiness you never even expected.
The excitement, adventures, happiness keep the spark alive in a romantic relationship. Boredom makes your relationship dull and dry.
18. He acknowledges the raw YOU!
There’s something about men who don’t want you to change and love you for what you are.
You don’t have to fake your emotions. He doesn’t ask you to behave in a different way in front of his friends and family.
You can cry in front of him without feeling guilty. Infact, even he doesn’t feel any hesitation revealing his vulnerable side In Front of you… the masculine ego doesn’t come in between.
19. He is grateful.
Real men never leave an opportunity to express gratitude to their women. If he showers you with thankyou(s) time and again, girl, he is the ONE!
He doesn’t take you for granted and knows how to respond when you do something for him. He values the love and emotion behind your actions.
20. You get along with his family and friends
A man is known by his company. If you like his friends and family, you’re going to enjoy his company.
Healthy partners will always want you to socialize with their inner circle. Similarly, if you have found your better half, then he should be uncomfortable when you are meeting his family or friends.
You should be able to communicate freely with his circle. He shouldn’t expect you to put up a pretentious act in front of his mother, which makes you feel unaccepted and “not the real you”. You know what I mean, right?
21. He lets you vent, without interruption
On bad days, when you just want someone to vent, he doesn’t take offense and listens to you calmly. He doesn’t get bored of it, doesn’t interrupt or backfire.
A guy who never leaves your side when you’re cranky, and helps you to shrug off the frustration after a long day is absolutely worth it.
He stands right beside you with all the patience in the world, is available at your beck and call and even cuddles to comfort you.
He never passes any comments or judgements, listens to you without any complaints and calms you down.
22. He lights a candle when you’re in darkness
Of course, you wanna hear: all is well, when literally nothing is well in your life. These three words sound even more comforting when whispered by the love of your life.
You are lost, not knowing what to do or where to go… he does everything in his power to spark the light when you are in darkness.
You don’t care what goes on in the outside world, you feel emotionally secure that your man is there to light up your world with lots of hope, happiness and positivity when you need it the most. You know you can ace anything with him by your side.
23. You don’t have secrets
You may keep some dark secrets from the whole world or even with your inner circle but not with this person.
With him, you’re an open book, without a speck of doubt or guilt. Secrets can create rifts among partners later in life… so, if your partner provides you the comfort to be bare open Infront of them… then, why not?
You shouldn’t be afraid to talk about your male best friend, in front of your boyfriend. No matter how hard it is, you know you can share it with him.
24. He’s your go-to person to share a new story
He is the first one that comes to your mind, whenever something significant (or insignificant) happens with you. You feel like if you don’t tell him, you will explode out of excitement.
He, on the other hand, listens to all your tales happily and never lets you feel clingy or silly about it. It may have been your parents or best friend earlier, but now he is the one. Yes, he is THE ONE, baby!
25. He doesn’t try to change you as a person
You may not be ideal for him or you may be just another girl who doesn’t know how to act in a defined way, and that’s fine!
…yet, he doesn’t attempt to change you.
You don’t know something and are not willing to learn, but he doesn’t force you into things.
If he is ready to overlook all your flaws, because he is in love with your inner beauty, then yes, he definitely deserves you and your love.
26. He misses you ALL THE TIME!
Missing someone is one thing, expressing that feeling is another.
One who loves you will not want you to stay apart, even for a few seconds. You know when you’re not giving him the required time or attention, it shows in his behavior.
You are on his mind even when he is miles away from you, enjoying with his friends, or partying hard with his colleagues.
27. You wait for him to return
You’ve grown up in your own space in a room without anyone… but this guy makes you feel something’s missing when he’s not around.
You prefer to stay with him, and you keep longing for him to return. You want the day to end soon just so you get to see him.
These are signs of inseparable love honey!
28. You don’t keep complaining about him
You know the gossip sessions, when all the girls are roasting their boyfriends together. And you’ve simply got nothing to complain about!
You sit quietly, with nothing to contribute to the gossip. I’m not saying that you start bragging about him or something.
You may have a couple of sarcastic jokes to make, but you don’t have any serious grudges because you are blessed with a wonderful and understanding partner.
29. Life with him seems beautiful
Girl, when you think of marrying him, it shouldn’t be all about the wedding day, the ceremonies, the attire, makeup, and the certificate that allows both of you to live together and enjoy physical pleasure without being image conscious.
You want to marry him only because life seems beautiful with him. Spending the rest of your life in his embrace feels as delightful as a day in DisneyLand.
You can’t stop imagining the level of comfort and satisfaction you will enjoy after marrying this gentleman who makes your life blissful from all aspects.
30. He sees the glass half full
When your family, relatives, and others ask you to take note of your “imperfections”, this one man saves you and makes you aware of all the tiny splendors that you are gifted with.
He tells you about your honesty, the purity of your heart, your boldness, and your innocence. He is in love with everything other people think of as flaws.
For him, you are the most perfect girl to ever exist. He doesn’t let you enter the “not-good-enough” zones.
But you shouldn’t depend on someone else to see the glass half full. Be confident and don’t judge yourself based on what others think about you.
As a matter of fact, people open up their mouths to blabber and judge you on matters they’ve never experienced in life.
31. He supports your dreams
This ideal lover is not one who suppresses your aspirations. A true partner doesn’t question why you want to do something.
Rather, he asks you about the ways in which he can help you achieve your goal. That’s what true love looks like.
He tries to become the catalyst in making you achieve your goal faster. Even if your success requires him to make some sacrifices, he is ready for it.
He doesn’t mind if you can’t give him enough time during your exams. He keeps you physically and mentally motivated to counter all the hardships that come in between you and your goals.
32. He’ll do all that is needed to be with you
He doesn’t leave a chance to spend some moments with you. He pays you unexpected visits even on the busiest days… just to be with you.
So, girl, if he does something unusual, just to spend a few minutes with you, it is a great sign that this man will treat you special throughout life!
33. You are bestest buddies-cum-lovers
Being a lover is easy nowadays, but being a best friend who stands by your side through thick and thin days is extremely valuable.
Finding a best friend in the form of a lover is rare. So, if you have someone who not only shares his heart but also goofs around with you, then he is the one. Keep him locked up because he is rare!
If you can say – who cares if the world is not with me, I have a life partner who is all in one – there’s nothing like it!
34. He is open and honest
Honesty may seem basic but is still rarely found in people. People pretend to be honest only until the honeymoon phase… and when the spark fuzzes, they get back on the ride to find someone else.
If you look close enough, you can easily differentiate between who’s actually honest and who’s just playing around.
No one can pretend 24*7 and there will be a day when they reveal themselves in front of you… and that’s when you need to keep your eyes open.
If you know this person will never, NEVER stab you in the back, he is THE ONE for you!
35. Everything related to you interests him
He wants to know every bit of you. I mean, EVERY TINY BIT. He may have the answers to most questions, but he wants to know more.
Any issue or matter that involves you automatically catches his attention.
He wants to know all about you… your past, present, all the silly things you’ve ever done… everything. This curiosity and interest show that he loves listening to you, and about you!
36. He accepts your past relationships gracefully
A person who is wise will never judge you on the basis of your past relationships. In fact, they will also help you work on your present, instead of staying hooked to your past.
He doesn’t care how close both of you were, he doesn’t ask you about your physical proximity with him and is simply not concerned about your ex’s life.
All he is concerned about is whether or not you’re over it. That’s a man of honor, sweety!
37. He learns your likes and dislikes
He puts in constant effort to do things you like and tries to avoid things you dislike. Maybe you’ve caught him taking notes of your likes and dislikes.
He never fails to ensure that the fridge is stocked with your favorite ice cream flavor and that you’re not around substances that cause you allergy.
Sometimes you find him sacrificing his favorite things, only because you don’t like them. If you have such a man in your life, you have the most valuable gem, honey. Never let him go.
38. He is a source of positivity
It is easy to discuss someone who is trapped in a toxic relationship, but it is really difficult to live with the toxicity and survive the poison in the relationship.
A toxic relationship leaves you with long-term scars. But only good things happen when you are in a positive and encouraging relationship.
You find yourself brimming with positivity and always motivated. That way you see yourself becoming better with each passing day…
39. He knows how to make your heart race
Sex with a person who can understand at a soul level is an experience you’ll never forget. But hey, it’s extremely rare.
He will know all your erogenous zones by heart and knows the acts that make your heart skip a beat.
Intimacy is also an aspect of showing love, trust, and comfort with each other, but when it is done right, it takes you to different heaven on earth!
40. He is not jealous of your male friends
You have both male and female friends. But most boyfriends do not want their partners to socialize with “male” friends.
It’s acceptable if he is protective about you but putting the blame on you is definitely not right. You should be able to spend time with your friends, without worrying about your partner getting upset over it.
So, if you have a guy who trusts you and your actions, and if ever misunderstood, tries to discuss the situation calmly… then it’s time you should plan a proposal for him and take this relationship to the next level.
41. He doesn’t fear commitment
The one with clear intentions will also remain prompt in their actions. They will not try to their words when you both are discussing the future.
He’s all in to commit to you for a lifetime, no questions asked. That’s what you call a man of words. You can see his determination in his eyes.
If someone is so determined, then you know you have got someone who won’t back out, no matter how hard the ride gets.
He will talk to you about future goals in the relationship and will stick with you until the end.
42. Your eyes do the talking
Communication with words is common, but have you ever come across someone who understands you even without words?
They know what you’re feeling just by the look of your eyes. Isn’t it magical… how love binds you both?
Your eyes give him the whiff of your current mood and your eyelids spill out all the secrets.
That is what we call chemistry. Love!
43. He is hardworking
He is thinking, planning, and also working hard just to safeguard you and your interests.
Even if you are financially independent, this man does not sit lazy at home.
Little things matter to him. He doesn’t want you to go through discomfort just because he wasn’t supportive of you, financially.
He is working diligently to secure the future life of the coming generation. Plus working hard also defines him as a loyal and disciplined man… worth every ounce of your commitment.
44. He helps you grow as an individual
He never asks you to surrender your own individual personality.
In fact, he knows that you are his girlfriend but he also knows that you are an individual, with her own goals to fulfill and responsibilities to take care of.
He never complains about your irresponsible behavior and makes efforts just so that you don’t get stuck in a mess.
He’ll keep you guarded through all walks of life, and let you grow as an individual everyday.
45. He asks about your day
He never misses out on asking you: ‘How was your day?’ Not because he wants to enquire about something, but because he wants to know how you spend your day. He wants to ensure your good health, both physically and mentally.
And when you start sharing your story, he listens to it carefully, with intent.
If you’ve had a bad day, he knows how to comfort you, or if you’ve had a good day, he knows how to celebrate. That’s when you know he is the ONE, darling!
46. He never gets offended
You cannot live with a partner who gets offended with your honest opinions.
For instance, maybe you told him about the one date night you didn’t like his outfit and instead of taking it in a good spirit, he gets offended.
They start behaving in a scornful or revengeful manner. Instead of healthy feedback, your suggestion just became an offensive comment.
This is the result of having a poor egocentric personality. On the other hand, if your beloved does not get offended by your honest opinions, you feel more comfortable expressing what you think.
He does not backfire and is ready to step back and listen to what you are saying.
47. He’s both serious and funny
An ideal partner should know how to behave in accordance with the circumstances.
For instance, if you both are sitting in a premium dinner and it requires thoughtful discussion… your partner shouldn’t crack silly jokes there.
On the other hand, if you are on a holiday trip, or at a party, he shouldn’t be attending work calls.
He should know how to be serious and goofy both, and have a balanced personality.
48. He’s romantic to the core!
If he is a passionate love maker, then gal, you got a catch!
Like, all those passionate and unstoppable kisses, teasing, the cuddling, you really got your match! It feels so giggly when he just grabs you by your waist and plants a kiss on your forehead.
It’s simply a treat to watch him lose control when you are around him, when he just cannot stop touching you.
And it’s not only physical love, he fills you emotionally too. You are treated like a lady, with care and caution. You feel sexier than you are. I mean, that already makes him so desirable and worth the catch!
49. He checks upon your health
Health is wealth. If he is your true match, he can never ignore your health. He doesn’t let you take contraceptive pills because he really loves you and doesn’t want you to get into health-related troubles.
Even if he is busy in a meeting, he doesn’t forget to remind you about your medicine. Long story short, your health is his first priority.
50. He surprises you with gifts
Who doesn’t want to be bombarded with luxurious gifts and surprises? But your husband or your lover should not be offering you gifts that lack sentimental value.
One can compromise with expensive gifts but one cannot accept gifts that lack emotions.
You never know what’s going to be the next surprise because he is such an unpredictable lover. Nothing in excess, but just enough to keep you happy and brighten your day with a smile on your face.
51. He cancels his plans for you
He is ready to drop everything else the moment you are in need. If you are stuck in a horrible situation, he is always there at your rescue.
Now that doesn’t mean that you should expect him to be 24×7 at your service, saying: “I’m ready to obey whatever you say, your highness.”
That’s not how a relationship works.
But he makes sure, you’re never second on his list, always, I repeat, ALWAYS first!
Bonus: He apologizes!
To err is human… He is a human too and can make mistakes. But then he must also be willing to apologize later.
You’ll often come across men who have a very dominant personality and never admit to their mistakes.
Saying sorry feels like their life is ruined, it hurts their ego, and they feel disrespected. Gone are the days when such men were acceptable by society.
If you are lucky enough to have a man who plans his apology romantically, so that you forgive him without thinking twice, then you are in the right hands, baby.
He cares for your emotions, and loves you much more than his ego. He knows how to make amends. What else would you want?
So, these were a few signs that your THE ONE will show… but remember, he is not bound to necessarily comply with ALL… they might comply to a few but still be your perfect match.
Remember, the strongest sign is still when your intuition tells you: he is the one.
If your gut tells you, you’ve found your perfect match, then no matter if he complies to every single point mentioned in the list above or not, you can always give him a chance.
If you are still confused, better take up the quiz right here to reach a conclusion.
Is he the one quiz
Wondering if this quiz is gonna help? Of course, it will… but you need to take it to believe it.
Go through the questions, choose your options, and the answers will take you to the “final” answer!
1. Are you still thinking about your ex?
A. Absolutely not!
C. Sometimes I do.
2. Do you feel a magical connection with this person?
A. Yes, very strongly.
3. Does he make you feel inferior?
4. Is he supportive?
A. Yes. He’s very supportive.
B. No… never.
C. Sometimes. When our decisions match.
5. Do you feel special when you are with him?
C. Mostly, yes…
6. Does he dominate you?
C. Yes. Sometimes.
7. Can you imagine a future with him?
A. Yes, why not?
B. Not really.
8. Does he apologize for his mistakes?
C. Mostly, yes
9. Does your relationship feel boring?
C. Yes. Sometimes.
10. Do you feel secure with him?
A. Yes, the safest.
C. Not always, but yes.
11. Can you trust him with your secrets?
C. No. Not all.
12. Are your efforts being paid back?
B. Not at all.
C. Some only.
13. Do your family and friends like him?
C. Don’t know.
14. Do you feel free to express your emotions?
15. Is he possessive?
16. Does he bring gifts for you?
17. Is he honest with you?
C. Don’t know.
18. Does he compare you with other girls?
19. Does he listen to you, patiently?
20. Is he concerned about your health?
If your answer is mostly A
Voila! The king of romance, your prince charming, seems to be a very close fit for you.
Since he doesn’t dominate you, and lets you enjoy your independent life without negative influence, you can expect a beautiful and happy future with him.
But before you make a commitment, I advise you to take some time for observation, because you never know what destiny has in store.
If your answer is mostly B
If you have answered B mostly, then dear, I’m sorry to say that your relationship boat may or may not survive the waves.
Honestly, you shouldn’t even think of giving it a chance because there is a strong possibility that it is going to be a disastrous experience for you.
If your answer is mostly C
Now this is a dilemma. You are not sure about some crucial aspects of a relationship; I cannot give you a concrete answer.
All I will say is, take a few more days for observation and give one more attempt at the quiz. Spend time with him, try to get to know him better.
If some of your answers start moving to A, then you get a green signal. And if it is B, it’s better you forget him, darling!
A word from ThePleasantRelationship
Now that you know the signs, it’s time for some action.
But before that, remember, if he is the one written in your stars, then he will find his way to you, sooner or later.
But if not, don’t lose hope and keep faith. Don’t commit just because you can’t wait to have a partner.
Don’t let wrong people enter your life and disturb your inner peace. Make fair and just decisions for yourself.
And most importantly, hope for the best and keep yourself prepared for the worst. Don’t let unfavorable circumstances affect the beautiful person that you are!
Surabhi wakes up every day with a drive to craft words that can create a soulful impact. Creatively adventurous, she is always seeking to learn new skills and acquire new experiences. With a hidden soft corner for languages (especially Urdu), she writes poetry occasionally, binges on romantic shows, and LOVES to talk. A hustler, admirer, chaser, Surabhi is just another-someone who refused to give up on her dreams. She says, she is just somebody who’s trying to make herself a writer and for now, she’s just writing...