“I feel like a hopeless romantic stuck in a generation of unread texts and unanswered calls.”
Damn! So Relatable.
Do you also feel your heart skip a beat when similar quotes pop up on your Instagram feed? Me too! *raises hand in excitement*
Well, the love you (or me) want is rare. You want the old-school romance. Late-night conversations. Candle-light date nights. Long walks on the beaches… and the list never ends.
…and no matter what your hard-nosed mates say, you are hell-bent on finding that love.
Then you, my love, are a hopeless romantic.
Believe me, sometimes hopeless romantics do not even realize they are one.
Let us find out what makes you one!
P.S. I am rooting for your fairy-tale kinda love!
Hopeless Romantic Infographic
Hopeless Romantic Meaning
A hopeless romantic is all-about-love. They are selfless and sensitive in love and will stick with you throughout the journey.
For hopeless romantics, love is precious and the most valuable thing in the world. As some people would say, they see the world through rose-colored glasses and hope to experience a dream-like love.
Umm…it is true, to a certain extent.
But here’s a fact that most of you didn’t know: hopeless romantics are aware of the harsh reality of love. They go through the worst heartbreaks because of their soft and kind nature.
But that doesn’t stop them from falling in love again. Right, buddy?! *high five
They know that love is not just about happy moments. It is also about living every part of the journey together.
They may be idealistic, but they are also extremely expressive and wear their heart on sleeves.
Wherever you are in life, your love should be beside you celebrating you, uplifting you, encouraging you.
A hopeless romantic is often the most selfless one in a relationship. They get attached to the smallest gestures their partners do for them and like to reciprocate ten times more than the love they receive.
Long story short, their whole world is centered around just one maxim: Love Conquers All!
Where does Hopeless Romantic come from?
The phrase originated from a novel in 1855, then made its way to articles in the 1920s and 30s. From then, it still continues to have a lasting influence.
The first references to a hopeless romantic can be seen in Marie Price La Touche 1855 novel Lady Willoughby.
In the novel, the mother urges her son not to fall in love with a hopeless romantic, fearing such an attachment will drive him away from his path.
She fears that her son will fall in love with an undeserving woman who will fill his life with despair.
Then, it was mentioned in the British magazine The Nation in 1917. The phrase also seems to be prevalent in literary articles in the 1920s and 30s.
It was used to describe people who fall in love frequently, without thinking about anything else.
Till today, the phrase continues to be on the lips of the modern generation, who tend to idolize this kind of love.
From young writers to global pop singers, hopeless romanticism has been influencing all types of art.
All that is fine. But how would you know that you’re a part of this I-want-all-the-love troupe…
20 Hopeless Romantic Signs
I know it may seem like being a hopeless romantic is bliss, and it is most of the time.
But other times, you are filled with loneliness and despair. But still, you tend to look on the positive side, ALWAYS.
If you are reading this, I feel you.
But if you are still seeking some assurance… Here are some signs that you’re a part of this extra-love ~ extra-romance group!
1. Your romance ignites fast but also burns out quickly.
Let me say it, loud & clear: hopeless romantics fall recklessly in love.
For a hopeless romantic, the love is very intense and passionate at the start. They will always be all about you, you, and only you.
However, the tables may turn very fast… because these people seem to get over it pretty quickly. You are less likely to find them in long-term relationships because their feelings fade away fast.
If one stops feeding on their old-school idea of romance, they will first start feeling despair and eventually fall out of love.
But that doesn’t mean it’s the end of the world for them. Once the misery of the heartbreak subsides, they will fall in love again… and again… and again.
Tip: Go slow and let your love marinate before you dive in.
2. You are often faced with one-sided relationships.
You should know one universal thing about hopeless romantics – they are very kind people. These people give everything in a relationship – physically, mentally, emotionally, time, space, gestures – EVERYTHING.
But, when they do not receive the same kind of love and affection from their partner, they feel they are not doing enough. So, they try to make more grand gestures for their partners.
They think that making grand gestures might make them win back their partner’s love. This often leads them to one-sided relationships where they feel more lonely than ever.
Ugh! Expectations hurt.
3. Your idea of love is OTT!
You have incredible insights into true love, public displays of affection, and relationships. You are someone who becomes happy seeing random strangers fall in love.
Your happy moments include walking under peaceful trees amid lakes and silent cafes because it feels like a replica of your fantasy world. It is almost as if love runs in your veins.
In your eyes, love is a mystical feeling that defies all kinds of negativity in the world.
Love brings people closer. It is the one thing humankind still has faith in…. and, this makes you happy.
4. You ignore all the warning signs.
Do you remember when I told you we like to be positive all the time? Yeah, sometimes that doesn’t work in our favor. Hopeless romantics can be overly optimistic about their relationships.
They form an image of how a relationship should be in their mind. You can always count on your hopeless romantic friends for relationship advice. But, when it is their turn, they suck at it.
Love seems to put a blindfold in front of their eyes. These romantics ignore all red flags that can affect them in the future.
Or even if they do notice it, they try their best to convince themselves that it’s nothing.
5. You’re obsessed with all-things-romance.
If you ask me how you can spot a true hopeless romantic, listen to how they speak about love.
Hopeless romantics are in love with the idea of love itself. Everything seems to have a different meaning for them when connected with love.
They desire fairytale-like romance in real life. It includes watching movies, reading romantic novels, watching romantic comedies, writing poetry, and the list never ends.
They love to stay in their little world of delusion, where love and romance are the most precious things in relationships.
6. You take emotionally-driven decisions.
Hopeless romantics are extremely emotionally-driven people. They take every decision powered by their hearts, not minds.
These people are awfully raw with emotions and wear their hearts on their sleeves. But the sad part is, most times, they don’t receive the same kind of love in return.
When hit with the harsh reality of unmet expectations, these romantics experience a roller coaster ride of feelings.
They start feeling everything deeply, and this becomes emotionally draining for them.
7. You are in love with the idea of the person.
They will ideally want love at first sight or maybe the Disney kind of love where the prince charming meets the princess and falls in love with her, and they live happily after.
As soon as they meet a potential love interest, they start idealizing them as their Disney prince/princess without actually observing who they really are.
They fall in love with the idea of the person, not the actual person.
And this is why most hopeless romantics get stuck in toxic relationships. It takes a lot of time for them to go beyond the spotlight and realize that the light reflecting on them wasn’t the sun but a torch.
All that glitters is not gold, honey.
8. You take pride in being a martyr in relationships.
Yes, the idealized view of hopeless romantics makes them think that being a martyr in the relationship, will keep the relationship alive.
But in reality, that’s not the case.
Hopeless romantics develop this idea that in order to receive love and respect, they must always give and give.
Further, it also makes them frustrated when their partner does not value their sacrifices, least of all making them.
One word for this is they are victims of the White Knight Syndrome.
9. You daydream about “the one”.
If you tell me that hopeless romantics devote their time to watching romantic movies and novels and never daydream about the one. Then you, my friend, are wrong.
Hopeless romantics love daydreaming about scenarios where they are the main character of a Nicholas Sparks movie or the muse of a love song.
In fact, most people do not even realize when they are dreaming about it. Honestly, escaping reality for a while is their favorite thing to do – It makes them feel better.
So naturally, if their real-life relationship does not match their version of love. Then, they go deep into the delusion of dreams where they can escape to a more fantasy-filled romance.
Snap out of those daydreams, mate because in the end, you need to face the reality, however harsh it may be.
10. You are picky with your partner.
If you are a hopeless romantic, you probably had very few relationships in the past. That is because of your high standards and expectations from love.
If you cannot have the strawberry-covered relationship, you wouldn’t settle for a chocolate wafer.
Of Course, you won’t, why would you?
You want a person with whom you can go out on adventures and share an ice cream together, go on long drives at night and also have a deep conversation.
A relationship where you can be goofy and madly in love with each other – both at the same time.
As a sucker for old-school love, you are picky with anyone who wants to be a part of your life.
11. You want to be all-day-every-day with your everyday.
When you are in love with someone, you are all about them.
You want to spend your entire day with your beloved… 24*7*365. Besides that, you also want to know everything about their hobbies, interests, and anything that makes them happy.
But while you are at it, you forget to prioritize yourself.
Understand that you are as important as your partner. Stop giving away so much of yourself that you forget to check your own growth.
Spend time with your partner, but pay attention to your needs as well, for it is the one thing that strengthens a relationship for the long term.
12. Romantic movies can make you cry.
A hopeless romantic is a very soft person when appreciating art. They just naturally connect with anything that has a deeper meaning to love. Classic romance movies and novels are close to their heart.
If you are seeing a movie with a hopeless romantic, keep a lot of tissues handy. They may cry a lot because they cannot help but shed tears while witnessing love win over everything else.
I cannot remember a single time when I watched The Notebook, and there haven’t been continuous tears in my eyes seeing Noah and Allie. If you are a bird, I am a bird. Remember?
13. Your heart just melts at cute-little romantic gestures.
As a person, who loves to give everything in a relationship, a hopeless romantic never fails to acknowledge when they are met with the same kind of love. It just melts their hearts if they feel like you care.
Whether you take them out for dinner at a fancy restaurant or just buy them a rose – It will melt their heart just the same. You will see it in their eyes how much they long for your tiniest gestures.
Hopeless romantics are the kind of people who will save a little souvenir every time you feel appreciated. It helps them create a box full of happy and full-of-love memories.
They visit these souvenirs from time to time and relive that moment.
I bet you keep a hidden box of your most treasured memories. 😉
14. You absolutely believe in the fact that “love defies all”.
A hopeless romantic is someone who genuinely believes in the power of love. They have undying strong faith in love. No matter how many times they have been hurt in the past, their view of love never changes.
They are always teased for their idealized definition of love. But in reality, hopeless romantics use love as their sole motivation to work on their relationship.
Love helps them overcome all kinds of obstacles in their way.
Indeed, Love makes you feel like a superhero.
15. You don’t find anyone “good enough”.
In the era of dating apps and hookups, your love feels rare to find. It is like no one is good enough for you or none can match your level of devotion.
Hopeless romantics make their partners feel like the center of the universe. But, their partner does not seem to appreciate it or give back the same energy.
They would feel like they are wasting their time on something that is not worth it. And that is why hopeless romantics start cutting off from everyone that comes on their ‘not good enough’ list.
16. People around you always tell you that you’re hopeless romantic.
I am not surprised by this and, neither should you.
Neither of us realizes this until our whole friends’ group starts calling us hopeless romantics. It is easier to spot a hopeless romantic than to come to the realization that you are the one.
But, it becomes easier once you believe that your faith in love is ironlike.
You know how you see love differs a lot from others, and you must be proud of that.
17. You put in everything you got.
Baking a cake or going out on a date – you give your best in everything.
According to you, each part of a relationship is sacred and must be handled with sincerity. That is why no matter how old your relationship gets; you always want to keep the spark alive.
You don’t mind investing ALL your time and emotions in the relationship because, in the end, all you want is their happiness.
This becomes really exhausting sometimes. But you always seem to find your happiness just by seeing the smile of your significant other.
I am grinning ear-to-ear right now.
18. You’ve had endless disappointments.
Here we go again. I have never met a single hopeless romantic who has not been through disappointment in their life.
It is part and parcel of every relationship. But due to the all-in/all-out nature of these people, they taste disappointment more often than others.
A hopeless romantic does not leave a single chance to make their love life #couplegoals. But sadly, the reality is a lot harsher than they think.
They are always stuck in an endless loop of sadness. They might not be able to keep their emotions in control but still, emerge as the more understanding ones in the relationship.
19. You’ll put yourself out there, AGAIN.
Even after being hurt in the past, suffering, and struggling with toxic relationships, you are not afraid to love again. It is one of the most beautiful traits of a hopeless romantic.
But, it does not mean they do not get hurt. In fact, they are the ones who get hurt the most, but they are never going to blame love for it.
They always believe that something else, something rare, something blissful, is out there, waiting for them. And true love is worth the wait.
Take a deep breath and let love find its way to you.
20. You glow up in the relationship.
I know it is a common interpretation that a person glows differently in love. However, this is not the case with hopeless romantics.
Hopeless romantics seem to be totally different when in a relationship and in a good way. They feel more confident, they laugh more, and glow more.
They radiate positive energy that draws everyone to them.
As someone all about love, a hopeless romantic is their best version during a relationship.
Now that we know the signs let us move to the traits of a hopeless romantic.
Characteristic Traits of a Hopeless Romantic.
Some of us adapt to the nature of a hopeless romantic, while some of us are born hopeless romantics.
So, if you want to know if your traits belong to the second group, stay by my side a little more and keep reading.
1. You never shy away from showing your emotions.
The most out-there characteristic of a hopeless romantic is that they do not hesitate to express their feelings, not even once.
Whether they are surrounded by people, peers, or just with their partner, it does not matter – they are not afraid of
If you’re one of them, I’m sure you dare the world to stop you from telling what you want.
2. You have your wedding planned out to the T.
It does not matter if you are single or committed at this moment, if you are a hopeless romantic, you have your whole wedding planned out in your head.
From the venue to season, from outfits to flower pieces, you have every detail planned and scripted.
You might have even imagined how you will walk down the aisle. You know what you are going to say to your to-be husband.
Caution: Do not get disappointed if your friends and partner do not follow the script in your head. Focus on enjoying your big day.
3. You have a dire love for romantic songs and poems.
You have a playlist for every mood, but your top playlist always has new romantic love songs that add up every week.
The music may make you feel closer to your love, but the lyrics are the real deal. The words reassure you that the love that you desire, exists.
And if I am correct, you have tons of romantic oldies in your playlist because you secretly wish you were in those times where love is celebrated like a dream.
*losing my mind over the dreamy 90s romance
4. You believe in the concept of soulmates.
No matter what your friends say, you are a firm believer in soulmates. You believe there is a person made for everyone in this world.
The universe will play its cards and the soulmates will end up together. You believe in the right place, right time kind of thing.
And that is why you wait because you know that person is out there, and you will meet them soon. Your soulmate is on the way.
5. Sex is not the MOST important aspect for you.
For most people, sex is an important parameter to understand their love life. But that is not the case with you. Physical touch might be your love language, but that does not necessarily mean sex.
You love to cuddle with your partner under the blanket and talk to them for hours. You have no problem going for months without sex (pun intended) because you feel more connected to their souls than their bodies.
Validating your feelings through sex is just not your thing. But, if there is just no physical intimacy, you start feeling distant from your partner.
6. Your relationship is your TOP priority.
It is already understood by now: Your relationship is the top priority in life, no questions asked. Now that does not mean you are not ambitious.
It just says you value your relationship more than other things. You are the type of person that finishes their work early because their partner is in a sad mood.
You voluntarily prioritize them because their happiness means everything to you.
7. You celebrate small (smallest) milestones in a relationship.
You are a very kind and selfless person when it comes to relationships… you love to support your partner in everything they do.
Even in your relationship, you love to celebrate every milestone and anniversaries. They become your stepping stones for the future.
You may get laughed at about this, but who cares?
You take these milestones very seriously because every aspect of this relationship means a lot to you…
8. Breakups feel like your world has turned upside-down.
Breakups are pretty hard on you. You forget finding joy in anything and continuously find yourself spiraled in despair and hopelessness.
You feel like you lost a part of yourself in that relationship.
Knowing when to stop asking yourself what went wrong is a more difficult task. You start questioning your own worth.
Moving on is a difficult process because you have a hard time letting go of the past.
9. You feel lonely when not in a relationship.
Although you love to enjoy your own company in art, music, and novels, you hate being single. You know it, your friends know it, everyone knows it.
You are filled with extreme love and, and you have no one to pour it on. Seeing all-happy couples post on social media makes things even more difficult.
That is why the no relationship phase makes you uncomfortable to the core.
10. You express your love out in the open.
You never fail to express your love for your partner with anyone… and you just need a person to ask you about your relationship and you won’t stop for hours.
And you know what’s the best part, the love will reek through your eyes, words, and even in your appearance.
Hopeless romantics are generally lovers who will write long posts on social media. They send love letters anonymously and hype their partners in every way they can.
You know the signs and the characteristics… and you’re still wondering what’s the “good” in it? Let me tell you.
Why is it Good to be Hopeless Romantic?
I am sure you must have already grazed through your personality and figured that (sadly) you’re one of them.
And now you are wondering, is being a hopeless romantic even worth it? Buddy, just keep reading, I am going to make you fall with who you are.
1. The belief that “it” is there can ultimately help you find it.
They say you are what you attract.
Hopeless romantics are great believers in love. Whether you blame it on romance movies or epic novels of classic love. These people are suckers for romance. They are optimists to the core.
It does not matter if they got hurt in the name of love. They would never stop idealizing their perfect partners. They never doubt their faith in finding their perfect partners.
And this never-ending belief actually helps them find their ‘it’… their perfect partners and their ideal love story.
2. Hopeless romantics tend to revive other’s faith in love.
Hopeless romantics have a totally different outlook towards love. If you ask them, they will describe love as the most beautiful feeling mankind will ever feel.
It is like a faith as strong as a follower has for their religion.
They can find love in the smell of a flower, among droplets of rain while watching a sunset. For them, a person is made with intricate details, just like nature. And it needs love to understand what it really is.
So, how can a person who can describe love like this not influence the idea of love for someone?
3. You prove to be one hell of a romantic partner.
Hopeless romantics prove to be one-of-a-kind partners – as dreamy as it can get. As a diehard lover, leave no opportunity to appreciate their partners in all ways.
Their display of affection knows no bounds. They will tell you how great you look even when you’re in your pajamas… care for you like a guardian… and protect you like the divine, himself.
They help you find the direction when you feel lost. You will get love letters that will make your heart go, awwwwwww.
There will not be a single moment when you will not find the warmth emanating from their love… because that’s how they are.
All these traits make them super adorable and desirable when it comes to relationships.
4. You celebrate love (in the real sense!)
I thought these people (including me) just want hopelessly romantic love, but that is not it. These people celebrate love in the true sense.
They never get jealous of others who find the partner of their dreams. In fact, they cannot stop rooting for them to be with each other, Forever.
They are the cupid that will help someone get the girl or guy they want. The entire group of friends comes to them for all kinds of relationship advice.
If you’re one of them, I know you’re nodding your head right now.
…You are their dating coach. You are their shoulder to cry on if love hurts them. Buddy, know that your support means the world to the one receiving it.
These people become happy when their favorite characters finally kiss, and the story ends into a happily-ever-after.
They take them as the inspiration of how love should look in life and never settle for less.
Oh boy! That pride and prejudice kiss made me swoon.
Even though you have high expectations of love, you never like to settle for less. You do not want to come out as the selfish one. Why? Because you are a natural empath.
You appreciate the efforts of your partner.
This is the reason your relationship satisfaction is higher than other couples. Further, it only keeps on increasing because even if your partner does not turn out to be the classic guy of your fictional novel, he is no less! 😉
Mutual understanding opens new gates for a relationship and you never let go of the key to those gates from your hand.
Why is it bad to be a Hopeless Romantic?
Hopeless romantics live for the kind of love that consumes them. They believe in the idea of destiny, and spending their life with “the one”.
However, tables may turn out pretty quickly, and being a hopeless romantic might not all be a bed of roses as you imagine.
One of the biggest concerns of being a hopeless romantic is that they ignore all the red flags that come with the person. They cannot identify when the relationship has started turning toxic.
Because most of the time, they fall into a delusion where they love the idea of the person, not the person itself.
They prioritize their partner’s happiness above their own. It is not wrong to make your partner happy and make some sacrifices on the way.
But these romantics tend to OVER sacrifice themselves, and this later spirals into their own disturbed emotional health.
Romance should never come at the expense of putting away your happiness in someone else’s hands and letting them control it.
One more issue that hopeless romantics go through is their escape strategies. It is not uncommon for them to think that they will spend their lives with the “one”.
But this attitude often results in hasty decisions and they try to escape their present relationship whenever a minor inconvenience happens.
Instead of sorting things out, they think it is better to end it, as they do not believe that (s)he is the one anymore.
By doing this, hopeless romantics sabotage their own relationships with their own hands.
So, instead why not be a hopeful romantic?
What is that… and how is it better than hopeless romantics – I will answer all your questions. Just keep reading.
Definition of Hopeful Romantic – Why are hopeful romantics better than hopeless romantics?
If you still are one of those who really want to stop being a hopeless romantic, I know what will come of help. It does not require you to change who you are, just the perception of it.
There is an opposite version of a hopeless romantic known as hopeful romantics. No, they are not realists who do not believe in love. They are also all-about-love, just like you.
But as the name suggests, they are not hope-less, they are hope-ful.
A hopeful romantic chases love but are pragmatic as well. They also get lost in the beautiful world of love, but they know that reality is different from the world of art.
A hopeful romantic is an optimist in a relationship.
Hopeful romantics may also seek assurance like you but, they do not attach their worth only to that assurance.
Just like hopeless romantics, hopeful romantics also crave ideal love. They are equally romantic and love to pour it out on their partners.
But unlike hopeless romantics, they don’t carry a not-good-enough attitude about their partners. Instead, they love them for who they are.
Where a hopeless romantic loses interest the minute anything goes wrong, a hopeful romantic takes it as a challenge to overcome.
They believe in working in a relationship rather than just relying on destiny.
Hopeful romantics have a growth mindset. They sure put on their rose-colored glasses when it comes to love but they know when they should take it off, and that is why hopeful romantics are a lot better than all of us hopeless romantics.
If you still need more validation, here’s a clear distinction between the two.
Hopeful Romantics vs Hopeless Romantics
The definition above may make you feel overwhelmed.
So, here I’ve tried to make a clear distinction between the two… so that you know the shortcomings of hopeless romantics and can improve on it wholeheartedly.
|Hopeful Romantics||Hopeless Romantics|
|Hopeful romantics have an optimistic perception of love. They know hardships are a part of relationships and will take mutual efforts to work on it.||Hopeless romantics are also optimistic in love. But when it comes to hardships and making efforts, they leave everything to destiny, making the relationship struggle before ultimately ending it.|
|Hopeful romantics give a lot of importance to small gestures, besides the grand ones. Gestures like calling them and asking how they are doing or texting them when you reach home might not make a difference for hopeless romantics. But for hopeful romantics, it just melts their heart.||Hopeless romantics are all about grand declarations of love. Reading novels has such a profound impact on their ideology of love. They are no less than a romantic don. This leads to suffocation most of the time because nothing is ever enough to fulfill their idea of a “perfect” love.|
|When a relationship is new, it is exciting. It feels great to be with your partner all the time, knowing what they like and dislike. But, once that phase is over, it is natural for things to slow down for a bit. A hopeful romantic understands that. They understand slowing down does not mean that love is over. They take it as a good sign that the relationship has entered a new stage and look forward to it.||Hopeless romantics love the honeymoon phase. They love the passion and intensity of a new relationship. But, when that phase is over, it irks the hopeless romantics a lot. They get bored and sad once the spark is over. Nothing interests them after that. It takes a lot of constant assurance for them to keep believing in the relationship|
|Hopeful romantics know what they need in a relationship. They also look for an ideal partner but not someone straight out of a romantic movie. They want a partner they can count on during their highs and lows – one who supports them no matter what.||Hopeless romantics have a long list of traits they want in their partner. From their looks to their emotions, hopeless romantics decide everything.|
|They fall in love with “the” person – in and out. The best and the worst phases, they love it all.||They fall in love with the idea of the person or the projected version of the person in their minds.|
|Hopeful Romantic don’t try to change themselves for the sake of a relationship, instead, seek ways to find a common ground.||They let themselves slide into toxicity and push the relationship into something it cannot be.|
Don’t be disheartened, my love.
This doesn’t mean that you’re all bad. You can always transition yourself from a hopeless romantic to a hopeful one… in just a few tweaks.
How to stop being a hopeless romantic and instead be a hopeful romantic?
A hopeful romantic was once a hardcore hopeless romantic don. Trust me. Been there, done that.
What you need right now is: change in perception. And that is where I am going to help you. I am going to help you to stop being a hopeless romantic and be a hopeful one.
1. Never, NEVER let the faith die.
I have not met a single romantic person who has ever doubted their share of love. This includes both hopeless and hopeful ones.
I know it is hard to keep up with that faith every time. And that too in a world that moves too fast to believe in these thoughts.
But you need to hold it tight.
Keep believing in it, meet new people, go on dates, get to know each other. Give time to the relationship… and let it bloom. Do not rush it. If the person is not as interested as you are, it is okay.
Love has its fair share of bumps and bruises, but it has its highs too. You cannot let the negativity pull you down.
And you never know, your undying faith in true love will actually lead to the most perfect relationship when you were not even expecting it.
2. Don’t rush your happy ending.
We all want a perfect relationship… and a hopeless romantic knows it more than anyone else.
Hopeless romantics have already scripted their love life to look like fairytales and they would do anything to find that.
In that rush, you often forget to prioritize your own needs and wants in the relationship. But as a hopeful romantic, you should not try to make a relationship what it is not.
Ask yourself, are you able to grow in this relationship? Does this relationship bring you mental peace and security even when you are not together?
If you do not find these answers, then stop trying to change the person how you want them to be. Because the longer you cling to a failed relationship, the longer you will have to wait to get what you are supposed to.
Find a person that makes you grow, supports you, stays true to themselves, and makes you happy! That is worth more than loving a mirage of a person.
3. Believe that love is not only the “fantasy” in your head.
Hopeless romantics create a world of fantasy in their heads where everything is as rosy as it can get. But the reality is, you cannot have everything the way you want.
Understand that love is more than just a fantasy. Sure, it is not wrong to keep expectations. You should never lower your standards and settle for less.
But, you need to let go of the fantasy that is creating turbulence in your relationship.
Hopeful romantics would not mind receiving love letters, flowers, or grand gestures of love on a random day. But they feel happier if there is stability in the relationship.
And, they need someone who can say, I am there with you on their not-so-good days.
But you need to understand that a healthy relationship is when you find a balance between fantasy and real life.
What I mean is, love is not always supposed to be in the honeymoon phase. It should be more than that.
But, if you feel like you need a bit more romance, that is totally okay as well.
Communicate with your partner and express your desire for it, and at the same time give them space to express themselves too.
4. If you want it, you need to put in the effort.
As hopeless romantics, you might think, love is easy. You just need to fall in, and the stars align themselves in the universe to make that relationship work for you, no matter what.
But real life doesn’t work like that.
You may not like what I am saying, but it is the truth.
Sure, sometimes love finds people during the most unexpected times. Maybe in a bar or in a small cafe at the end of the street. But, for most people, it does not happen like that.
You cannot expect love to fall in your lap without even trying. Just like you cannot expect anything else in life.
So instead, make efforts.
Tell your partner how you feel, go for dates, accompany them to something they like even if you do not feel like it.
That is how your love will grow and multiply.
5. Don’t lose yourself.
Hopeless romantics are extremely vulnerable when it comes to relationships. They do not mind losing their identity in a relationship.
And that, my friend, is a big no-no.
If you are a romantic person, you are passionate, expressive, and sensitive. You love commitment, and that is beautiful.
If someone is not putting in as much as you, do not try to lower your self-respect and do extra work yourself.
That being said, of course, such a relationship will fade away. But, at least, you will know your worth. That mistake will make you realize what you want in a relationship besides romance.
Believe me, somewhere, someone is praying to God to meet someone exactly like you.
You deserve all the love that you give in a relationship. Hold onto that feeling. You will get it.
Listen, I know being a hopeful romantic is better but do not feel sad about what you are. Most people in the world are hopeless romantics and, I can prove it to you…. with this list of FAQs.
Trust me the questions asked are so common all over the globe, that it is proof enough about its popularity.
Let us check it out.
FAQs about Hopeless Romantic
As I said, Hopeless Romantics are not all bad. But I’m sure you still have some questions lurking in your minds. So, here are your answers.
The opposite of a hopeless romantic is a Realist.
Hopeless romantics are preachers and believers in love but realists believe in stability and level-headedness. They look at life beyond the fireworks.
But beware, it may sound practical and efficient for a while; too much realism drives out the intensity of the relationships. Their too-forward approach can be a bit of a killjoy, which their partner may not be comfortable with.
In simple words, a relationship cannot thrive on too much realism.
Passion and Stability, Love-led discussions and life-led conversations, Romance and work – you need to have both if you want to achieve the balance.
It does not hurt to have a romantic relationship with a flavor of realistic approach attached to it.
Because at the end of the day, you cannot let yourself suffer in despair in order to preserve your idea of a fairy tale.
Honestly, you can create boundaries and have opinions and still be crazy about each other.
If given a choice, hopeless romantics would be totally okay with abandoning reality while living in a world of storybooks and musicals. Their ideas and notions control them.
When they come into a relationship, they become fragile. The emotions of a hopeless romantic are heightened, whether it is on a simple date night or a huge fight.
In other words, if you forget to reciprocate their feelings even once, they will get extremely emotional and disheartened.
They have difficulty giving space to their partners because they always want to be around them. This way, the relationship may become very frustrating because it is ultimately preventing growth.
If you’re a hopeless romantic yourself, let me tell you, this will in the end, turn against you and your happy ending. You will rather come off as undesired and unhealthy for a real relationship.
Having romantic fantasies is not a bad thing. But, it becomes counterproductive when too many romantic inclinations start impacting their relationships.
Excessive romantic inclinations make hopeless romantics exaggerate everything about their partner and relationship. It convinces them that the relationship is still working when in reality it’s dead.
You cannot pull down a hopeless romantic by one-sided relationships. They actually see it as a way to put in extra efforts hoping it will bring them rewards in the future.
That bandage is so tightly fixed on their eyes that they even dismiss the ones who are willing to help them.
To prevent toxicity from entering their life, hopeless romantics must maintain caution. They should never let their fantasy world take over their emotional health and identity in real life.
No dear! All hopeless romantics are not bad people. They are believers in love just like me and you and other people in this world. But sometimes, they let their fantasy world take over their mind and emotions.
Their feelings take control of their relationships and situations. Due to this, they often dismiss meaningful relationships and instead keep hanging onto toxic relationships.
What they really need is to focus on themselves for a bit.
Hopeless romantics should also focus on what they want and their ambitions… because the best relationship you can ever have is with yourself.
A word from ThePleasantRelationship…
Being a hopeless romantic is not easy. Your feelings, your thoughts, your ideals are doubted at every stage. Just like two sides of a coin, there are a lot of perks and bad things associated with it.
You are like a dating coach who is hell-bent on finding dreamlike love but isn’t sure if you ever will. Love is something that makes you alive and dead – both at the same time.
But hey, nothing in life will ever come as easy. Being a hopeless romantic is bliss, only when you can control yourself and your emotions… and eventually, emerge as a hopeful romantic.
Celebrate love and in the process, celebrate yourself too. This is what it is all about. Let yourself be free, and love will get to you. It is just a matter of time.
Finally, remember one last thing, love is beautiful and, so are you.
Do not let anything make you believe otherwise, not even you.
Surabhi wakes up every day with a drive to craft words that can create a soulful impact. Creatively adventurous, she is always seeking to learn new skills and acquire new experiences. With a hidden soft corner for languages (especially Urdu), she writes poetry occasionally, binges on romantic shows, and LOVES to talk. A hustler, admirer, chaser, Surabhi is just another-someone who refused to give up on her dreams. She says, she is just somebody who’s trying to make herself a writer and for now, she’s just writing...