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Sexual Frustration: What Is It and How Can You Deal with It?

Sexual Frustration: What Is It and How Can You Deal with It?

Updated on May 27, 2022

Reviewed by Julianne Cantarella, MSW, LSW , Certified Relationship Coach

Sexual Frustration - Definition, Signs, Causes, and How to Deal with It

So, you think you’re experiencing sexual frustration. I know how it feels.

Yet, no matter what, I’m glad you’re doing your part! And you reached the right place… because this think-piece has everything your heart desires.

There are not many medically reviewed facts about sexual frustration. It’s mostly related to emotional health.

Tbh, people simply define the frustration due to inconvenience with sex… and call it sexual frustration. But is that all?

Know a lot more than the obvious of this topic… because it’s not always about just sex!

Impatient? Let’s first head down to…

Sexual Frustration Infographics

Sexual Frustration - Definition, Symptoms & Signs, and Causes
Sexual Frustration – Definition, Symptoms & Signs, and Causes
What To Do in Long Distance Relationship Sexually Frustrated & What To Do When Sexually Frustrated Single
What To Do in Long Distance Relationship Sexually Frustrated & What To Do When Sexually Frustrated Single

Sexual frustration meaning

The normal response of your body to lack of sexual activities or satisfaction is sexual frustration. It’s neither a medical condition nor the same as sexual arousal.

Sexual frustration is your body’s natural reaction to an imbalance in your sex life. It might be sexual dissatisfaction due to lack of sex drive, frequent sex, sexual desires, or even poor sexual health.

Perhaps, you don’t get what you desire, or can’t give what your partner needs. However, the reasons can be different for everyone.

For instance, you have regular sex but you’re dissatisfied because the quality isn’t good enough. Or, the sex is satisfying, but you can’t get enough.

Many misinterpret sexual frustration as horniness – feelings of arousal to have sex; a term to express being turned on. But sexual frustration includes wide negative interpretation.

It’s possible to be horny without feeling sexually frustrated. Contrarily, lack of sexual activity when you’re horny leads to sexual frustration.

You might not find the term sexual frustration in medical records… It’s not a disease, but it’s real. Everyone feels it… if you feel sexually frustrated, know you’re not alone.

Wondering if you or your partner is sexually frustrated? Let’s know from…

Sexually frustrated symptoms and signs

Sexual frustration can be different for everyone. A teenager’s sexual frustration might be different from adults’.

A sexually frustrated man might not behave the same as a woman. However, there’s no concrete distinction either. 

So, let’s find out if you need more sexual attention here…

1. Sex is lower than usual

The basic sign of sexual frustration is a lack of sexual activity in your life. It’s not just about intercourse or reaching orgasm… it’s about the entire feeling.

Don’t give yourself excuses like “Because I don’t have a partner.” You can also help yourself… but do you?

Perhaps the frequency of sexual self-help is too low… which led to pooling pent-up energy and feeling sexually frustrated.

2. Your babe isn’t feeling it

When were the last 5 times you made sexual advances on your partner? How many times did they refuse you?

Sometimes, lack of sexual attention from your partner, or refusal hurts the human ego. You might feel discouraged and avoid sexual advances altogether.

Usually, people wait until their partner makes a move after refusal… when it takes too long or feels forever, the pooling sexual energy results in sexual frustration.

3. You’re too drained for it

Another symptom of sexual frustration is feeling too exhausted and hitting the bed early.

Sometimes sexual frustration consumes your energy – sounds weird? Like, how can excess sexual energy lead to lack of energy?

Sexual frustration is a negative energy pool… while your body is full of negativity, you can’t absorb any positive energy.

This leads to the lack of sexual desire… and perhaps you don’t even wanna jack off.

The feeling of frustration becomes a vicious cycle.

4. Your partner doesn’t approve of your sexual desires

Are there certain sexual activities you can’t explore? For instance, you dream about something that needs more people.

Or, your partner doesn’t feel the same about those sexual activities.

You might experience sexual deprivation when you intensely desire an unachievable sexual action. The feelings of frustration arise from the deprivation.

Perhaps, you get enough attention from other sexual actions… but sometimes you can’t feel sexually satisfied because this one desire is unfulfilled.

5. Your demands are never-ending

Yes, you may ask for too much sex. Do you feel that you make sexual advances too regularly? How frequently does your partner decline you in a month?

Compare that to previous times… if they have been declining it more than usual, it might imply you’re asking more regularly.

Don’t blame yourself, because of your higher libido.

A higher libido implies that you’re not sexually satisfied… you might desire better quality sex or more frequent sex.

6. You are experiencing too many changes in your body

Did you notice any changes in your body? Perhaps you take medication for a physical issue… like blood pressure, blood sugar, or other common issues?

Maybe those medications led to dryness in your genitals or lowered libido? Another side effect of medicines is diminished blood flow near the genitals.

These medicines become an obstacle in your sexual life and you feel frustrated. It is one of the common symptoms of sexual frustration in the current world.

7. You always respond negatively

Are you always in a bad mood? Even though nothing is wrong in your life, do you always overreact? 

If you’re sexually dissatisfied, you might seem pessimistic about life in general. Sex boosts the production of feel-good hormones in the human body. 

You might not have enough of those hormones due to a lack of sex.

So, with a low quantity or quality of healthy sex in your life, you might feel sexual frustration at some point.

8. You don’t care anymore

Other signs of sexual frustration are not grooming yourself, ignoring hygiene… and even giving up on the entire thought of having sex.

You might feel that you’ll never get any action. Such feelings might be a result of sexual frustration after a breakup.

Or, a lack of long-term relationships with sexual intimacy can also be an issue.

Try sex toys when you don’t have anyone to help you. You’ll regain your confidence and focus on your hygiene.

9. You enjoy second-hand pleasure

Do you ask your friends about their sex life? Perhaps you release pent-up energy while imagining their sexual stories? If you live vicariously, you’re experiencing sexual frustration.

Sexual dissatisfaction can push you to the edge… you might ask your friends to have more sex so that you can mentally take note of the possibilities.

A vicariously living will never satisfy you completely.

It might feel good initially, but you can’t realize your personal feelings and desires.

10. Your sense of humor has become blunt

When people around you joke, do you react defensively? Perhaps nobody meant to hurt you but you feel attacked whenever they giggle and you don’t.

Lack of sex can impact your social relations. It might make a person feel inferior to their friends… because their friends have better sex lives.

If you can’t focus on your friendship and react sensitively to every sex joke, you’re sexually frustrated.

11. You feel jealous – frequently and unreasonably

Suppose your partner treats their sibling and their spouse heartily… Do you feel jealous?

Even though you know your partner will never cheat on you, everyone poses a threat nowadays.

If this sounds similar, you’re dealing with sexual frustration. Do your fights constantly revolve around your jealousy issues? Then that’s a major red flag right there.

Try talking to your partner about the issue. Further, if you don’t resolve the fights, it might result in breakups too.

12. You picked up binge eating

Any form of attention and affection boosts confidence and optimism in human life. If you desperately desire sexual attention but can’t get any… you might distract yourself by binging on substitutes.

You might eat or drink too much to feel happy. This might result in drastic weight gain or other serious and complicated issues in the body.

From now, before you binge on food or drinks for consecutive days, masturbate. You might be sexually frustrated, not hungry.

13. You are chasing a good-night sleep

How do you feel about your sleep routine? Do you fall asleep within 30 minutes of hitting the hay, or does it take over an hour? Do you get a long continuous sleep, or is it intermittent?

Another underrated sign of sexual frustration is bad sleep quality. You’re physically and emotionally dissatisfied with your sexual life which keeps you up at night.

It’s the feeling when you’re so tired but you can’t fall asleep. You feel frustrated that you can’t sleep even though you want to… Masturbate and you might sleep like a baby.

14. You might suffer from depression

Did you notice any signs of depression lately? Like losing hope, feeling suicidal, or abusing substances? Sometimes depression patients even hurt themselves by overthinking.

Well, there’s a connection between sexual frustration and depression. The lack of feel-good hormones from sex triggers depressive reactions.

Also, if you’re sexually dissatisfied despite having regular sex, you might doubt yourself. Self-doubt might lead to depressive characteristics too.

15. You’re always lost

When your mind is full of thoughts about your dissatisfaction, you might become inattentive in regular conversations.

You become preoccupied with “how to deal with sexual frustration?” and miss the important parts.

Perhaps, you faced difficulties in your personal or professional life due to focus issues.

Have you become more forgetful than usual? Or, did your professional performance spike down? It might be a symptom of sexual frustration.

16. You always turn to porn

Lately, do you watch porn too frequently? Perhaps, it’s disturbing your regular life? For instance, do you rub down there between your work from home?

And afterward can’t focus on work because you want more?

Or, you consume porn so much that you have no energy for your partner?

It implies that your desires are unmet… or, your partner is incapable of fulfilling your fantasies… so you watch porn to the point of addiction.

17. Every argument is about sex

Do you have a lot of fights about sex? It might be the type of sex, the frequency, quality, or certain sexual actions.

When your relationship doesn’t satisfy you, communication is the key.

However, everyone doesn’t possess good communication skills. So your conversation takes weird twists and turns and the last stop becomes the argument.

Though lack of communication skills is normal, don’t ignore your sexual frustration.

18. Your relationship seems dysfunctional, even when it’s not

When you have relationship conflicts, what’s the usual topic? If the topic isn’t about sex directly, are you sure the fuel isn’t sex?

Sometimes a person feels frustrated but doesn’t understand why. You might become intolerant to your partner’s sneezes, or anything in general.

Sexual frustration leads to relationship dissatisfaction… and you come to hate your partner because they can’t make you happy.

Due to sexual frustration, people blame their partners for their unhappiness and breakup to change their life.

19. You lost a virtue – patience

Another alarming sexual frustration sign that goes unnoticed is impatience.

Do you feel fidgety when your partner talks about something? Do you frequently lash out like “Will you come to the point quickly?”

Impatience also hurts your professional and personal growth. Perhaps you give up on your passions very easily.

Or, you don’t follow through with workplace instructions and get in trouble.

Suppressed sexual energy can make you fidgety and lose concentration easily.

20. You desperately seek physical touch

Do you frequently rely on physical touch to feel connected? Perhaps you feel lonely and insecure due to the lack of sex in your relationship.

People who don’t get enough sexual attention from their partners doubt their relationship.

They constantly seek validation with more physical contact. The touches may or may not be sensual.

You beg to connect with your partner intimately as a replacement for sex. This might imply you’re sexually frustrated since your partner lost interest in sex.

Wondering why it happened? Let’s dig into a few…

Causes of sexual frustration

You might not agree that you don’t have enough or desirable sex… Well, that’s possible too. Sometimes your reasons behind sexual frustration might not be straightforward.

When increasing the frequency or quality doesn’t help, don’t give up. Because, there are other ways to fix it, but that’s for later. 

For now, let’s dive into the causes…. 

1. You don’t have anyone

If you don’t have any sexual partner when you’re prepared for it… it’s quite frustrating. Everyone isn’t open to having sex even if you’re in a romantic relationship.

Perhaps, your relationships don’t sustain because of uncertainty about having sex. Or, when you date, you prioritize sex so much that your partners misunderstand you.

Not having partners can physically and emotionally impact you leading to sexual frustrations.

2. You can’t express your desires

Nobody was born a great communicator… so it’s not your fault if you can’t by default. However, lack of communication skills rubs off on your sexual life too.

For instance, if you want to spice things up, don’t expect your partner will without asking.

Tell them calmly… because many people unite the sexual frustration and the discomfort of communicating – and fight!

If you say “I don’t like this position”, your partner won’t understand. Lack of honesty and openness in communication also leads to sexual frustration.

3. You only think of orgasms

If you ignore the physical benefits of sex and focus on having an orgasm too much… satisfaction won’t come easy.

Also, very few women reach orgasm… so being a woman if you think too much about orgasm… or being a man you want to climax mutually… these are dead-set ways to feel sexual frustration.

Sex reduces stress, pain, blood pressure and improves cardiovascular health and even sleep.

You might feel sexual frustration for not focussing on the important part – physical health.

4. You believe sex is physical only

Perhaps, you don’t connect emotionally during sex? Lack of sexual intimacy or emotional bonding during sex drastically pulls down the satisfaction factor.

Sex is a way to bond with partners… so if you don’t, the experience might feel hollow, dissatisfying, pointless, and other negative feelings.

Casual sex or no-strings-attached doesn’t work out for everyone because emotionless sex results in sexual frustration too.

5. You believe sex is your reward

In some cultures, there are gender roles about sex. They might believe “Men are sexual beings, so they must make the first move”… or “I got her a diamond, so she must surprise me in bed”.

Such beliefs prevent them from asking what they want. They think sex is a transaction and they’ll get it whenever they help the other out.

If any of this rings a bell, know that you’re depriving yourself of your desires… this resulted in your sexual frustration, not your partner’s ignorance.

6. You’re on meds

If you’re suffering from hormonal imbalance, hypertension, or other common physical issues, you’ll need meds. And some can be the culprit behind your sexual frustration.

The simplest medicines hinder your sexual life… even some allergy meds can cause dryness in the genitals.

Some pills lower your sexual drive, obstruct your arousal, or even your ability to climax. Contraceptive pills have side effects too.

7. You have conflicting tastes

Another issue is when you and your partner have mismatched needs. Perhaps, your partner thinks that there’s too much sex, while you feel it’s too little.

Your definition of sex might be a more rough, intense, and longer sesh… while your partner prefers a conservative style with more delicacy.

Perhaps, your needs are unmet because you don’t wanna impose on them. Sometimes people in love can’t speak their minds to not hurt their lovers.

However, if you express yourself properly, you might find a solution for your sexual frustration.

8. You believe sex is a taboo

Do you believe sex is something bad? Is it because of your culture, or is it because of past sexual trauma or abuse? In both cases, you’ll feel troubled to engage in sex.

You might not get aroused at all because of your beliefs or experiences. Painful memories might wash in front of your eyes.

At some point, you might give up on sex because of the painful feelings.

You might also suffer from sexual frustration as a result.

9. Your life is stressful

Perhaps you’re stressed nowadays? Is a loved one ill? Or, you didn’t crack that big deal? Or, is it a financial issue? Anything can result in stress… be it small or big, all of them affect your life.

During stressful times, sex is the last thing on your mind.

When you need to have sex, but aren’t aware or aren’t in the mood… you might feel sexually frustrated. As complicated as it sounds, it’s possible.

10. Physical intimacy is lacking

Perhaps, you don’t actually crave sex. You want physical intimacy alone. But every time the physical contact results in sex.

Your frustration might not be about sex directly, but about inadequate physical intimacy. You want to bond with your partner in other ways than sex.

But everything leads to sex which results in your dissatisfaction. Your complicated feelings about physical intimacy and sex might stop you from enjoying sex leading to sexual frustration.

11. It’s general existential frustration

You can feel sexually frustrated even if it’s not the sex. Sometimes, you might be frustrated in general with life. It’s not like stress, but dissatisfaction with how things are never on point.

Something might be wrong in other areas of your life… which has no link with your sexual life. You feel your life is slipping out of your grasp and feel frustrated. 

12. You hardly hit it

Another simple reason behind sexual frustration is the lack of enough sex… or its absence.  Sometimes, even good-quality sex isn’t sufficient. The frequency of sex matters to some people more.

If it’s the same for you, there’s nothing wrong. Talk to your partner about it, else it will result in relationship dissatisfaction.  

13. Your partner is too selfish

If your partner only focuses on their pleasure, your sexual frustration is natural. Or, if your partner denies you satisfaction because they’re not into it… that’s also a reason.

When your sexual life is all about your partner, and never about you… it’s normal.

14. You’re in an inevitable phase

Well, if your partner is pregnant, menopause, or suffering from some genital issues, they might not be able to comfort you sexually.

Deal with sexual frustration during pregnancy with masturbation… don’t even think of leaving your wife’s side.

You know they aren’t at fault, but your body can’t take it long either. Sexual frustration during such phases is normal. Help yourself with toys and other sources to release the energy.

15. You’re always aroused

Some people suffer from an unfortunate medical issue named persistent arousal disorder (PAD). Patients always feel aroused or horny.

They want it all the time… which is obviously not possible even with multiple partners. After all, you gotta work for a living and eat to stay alive.

People with PAD always feel sexually frustrated because of their constant horniness.

Now that you know the signs… and the causes, here are a few…

Ways sexual frustration can show up in relationships

As per John Gottman, couples’ resort to poor communication during relationship turmoil.  This psychologist framed a well-known structure to save marriages – The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. 

Sexual frustration is also a rough patch in a relationship. So, you might experience these…

1. Criticism grows exponentially

When you feel sexually frustrated you might resort to criticism. You might attack your partner for not treating you well.

In the name of communication, you diss your partner and blame everything on them. You deeply trust that it’s completely their fault and you must get over the frustration with criticism.

2. Contempt in your voice increases

Another way is making yourself seem superior. For instance, you gift your partner something and expect sex in return.

When things don’t happen accordingly, you make them feel guilty for accepting your kindness. You say, “At least I do something to make you happy, what do you do?”

It crushes your partner’s heart immediately.

3. You use Défense to cover for real issues

From high sexual frustration, you might also twist your partner’s words. Perhaps they ask if you can pick the kids from the school… you give into temptation and retort with hurtful words like “Of course, I can.. do you think I don’t care for them?

When your partner says they didn’t mean anything like that, you twist their words again and say “Do you mean I’m dumb?”

Defensiveness is one way to have endless fights in your relationship.

4. Stonewalling becomes your last resort

And lastly, you stop communicating completely. Whenever you’re sexually frustrated, you give them the silent treatment.

Your partner wonders where they went wrong and you never settle things.

Don’t know how to strike up a conversation about it? Well, I’ve got you…

How to talk with your partner about sexual frustration?

Communication can solve many relationship issues but most don’t know how to strike a conversation. After all, it’s not something parents or schools usually teach. 

Contrarily, everyone expects you to be good at communication, to be empathetic… Do you think they expect too much from you? 

Not anymore, when it’s about sexual frustration… you can take some hints from here.

1. Avoid the Apocalyptic Horsemen

Before you begin talking with your partner, avoid Dr. John Gottman’s The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.

If you keep the conversation clean right from the beginning, that’s a good start.

If you feel you’re about to throw a horseman at your partner, reschedule the conversation. 

2. Change your tone

Share your thoughts but also be sensitive and understanding towards your partner’s feelings. If the sex is bland… don’t say “Your taste in sex sucks”.

Say, “I was wondering about trying something new… it caught my eye… wanna give it a shot?”

Change their perception of your thoughts… make it sound thrilling, not attacking.

3. Spill your fantasies

Instead of attacking your partner, introduce what you like, and don’t coerce them. Let them feel free to choose. When you approach your partner respectfully, they’re more inclined to consider it.

Share some sources about what you want. Check the sources before you share them. Don’t send something that might scare them.

4. Dig into their fantasies

Also, while you express yourself… ask them about their opinions on the new ideas. You both might have the same things in mind… perhaps things will work out better than expected.

Or you might get some kinkier idea on the subject. You can’t know everything in this world… your partner might introduce naughtier aspects too.

5. Make it work anyway

However, if your tastes don’t match, don’t give up on sex… try out new ways to find your perfect sexual compatibility.

If you’re into BDSM but they aren’t, try the soft-core ones to see how you both feel. If you want frequent sex but they don’t, ask them to help you out.

Define “sex” your way… remember, there’s no law about right sex.

Now that you know how to talk about it… let’s know about the real deal.

How to deal with sexual frustration?

Dealing with sexual frustration is tricky because you don’t know what might or might not work for you. So, I’ll suggest you try everything possible in your life to deal with it.

However, the phase of your relationship, or its lack, brings in a new twist.  Whether you want to release the sexual energy or ignore it completely… find different ways to solve your issue.

Depending on that, here are different ways to deal with your sexual frustration…

What to do in Long distance relationship sexually frustrated?

If you haven’t ever experienced a long-distance relationship… you’re lucky. We all know how hard it becomes to deal with sexual frustration when your boo is so far apart.

The physical intimacy is down, let alone the sexual one. Isn’t it?

Nope, let’s turn the tables with these…

1. Get frisky on the phone

This is the generation of technology… a generation where we’re blessed to reach out to our partner despite the distance. So pick up your communicating gadget right now!

Send them a risqué picture while they’re at work and hope for steamy virtual sex. Or, fix a virtual sex date and surprise them with your well-groomed body.

Talk dirty on call to set them on fire.

2. Spend time with loved ones

When they’re not around, hang out with friends and family. Sometimes, all you need is a big tight hug. Indulge in nonsexual physical contact to feel human warmth.

Also, sulking about sexual frustration won’t help. Spend time with your sweet grandparents, or your cute nephew/niece.

3. Create couple’s fitness goals

Being in a relationship doesn’t imply you gotta be sexually active together. Whether it’s a cultural thing or your personal feelings, release the suppressed energy in other ways.

For instance, set a fitness goal for each of you and join a gym to realize them. Avoid hard-core exercises from the beginning.

Release endorphins together to feel good in the relationship.

4. Try Edging

But if virtual sex is still on-board… edging is a great way to spice things up. Take each other to the edge of orgasm and deny it until you can’t hold it.

Wonder how when you’re so far apart?

Good communication, proper commands, complete sexual obedience, and trust in each other’s intentions… These four can help you experience virtual edging.

Also, don’t pressurize each other to stop or to have an orgasm… focus on enjoying rather than the definition of edging

5. Go Solo!

Just because you have a partner, you think you can’t touch yourself? Nobody made such rules, so explore all you want by yourself… After all, you know your body better than anyone else in the world.

Pleasure yourself all you want! Bonus: Tell your partner about your dirty deeds during solo sex later and make them jealous.

Don’t have a partner? That’s alright, go along with…

What to do when sexually frustrated single?

Whether you didn’t find your soulmate yet, don’t like emotional attachment, or just don’t want sex… you’ll have your answers here.

Think your sexual partners don’t turn you on? There’s a solution for that too!

Come on, let’s not delay anymore…

1. Use ethical porn content

Masturbation is a must for singlehood. But masturbation from random content might warp your expectations from real sex. Look up ethical porn to avoid that.

Ethical porn might be more favorable for women. But men will learn what to expect from a future partner while they pleasure themselves.

2. Try casual sex

Don’t abduct anyone for casual sex, that’s rape, consent is a priority. Look for people who’re interested in no-strings attachment or friends with benefits.

Or hire a sex worker from a proper organization, make sure they’re not forced. Communicate about your desires to experience the best.

Finally, never compromise with safe sex practices… because your life is valuable.

3. Entertain yourself well

When sex is always on the mind, distract yourself with good music. Make your room your personal karaoke bar. Sing along with your favorite songs to distract yourself.

Your mood will instantly swing with the groovy beats. You’ll feel happy and have control over your bodily desires.

Also, many studies show music can boost positivity in your life.

4. Put down your feelings in a journal

Want to calmly let go of the frustrations? That’s also possible… pick out a journal and pen down your feelings.

Whether you’re angry, sad, confused, or even feel horny. Write down every last word lingering in your mind.

Journalling can help you get rid of sexual frustration without exhausting yourself in or outside the bed.

5. Break a sweat

If you fancy a gym-freak, learn dancing, go jogging, or try other exhaustive exercises.

Pick out an adventurous outdoor activity that requires lots of training. Go out on solo adventures as soon as you fully learn them.

Distract the inner desires, and let some steam out in your dancing/jogging shoes.

But what if you’re legally bound, stay together, and still frustrated? Let’s know…

What to do when sexually frustrated in marriage?

When you’re under the same roof and stuck to the same person day in and day out… you need more strict measures.

Since you love them enough to get married, let’s deal with the sexually frustrated phase with the tips listed here.

1. Set aside time for pure intimacy

If you or your partner can’t set apart intimacy and sex, it’s time for research. Find out the difference between them together… one of you staying ignorant about it won’t work.

Pick a time to indulge in non-sexual intimacy. Be it a conversation, while playing a round of chess, discussing your future plans, or simply cuddling and holding hands.

Set a time when you won’t take things to bed, and listen to each other properly.

2. Talk with good intentions

Don’t hide your frustrations… however, take responsibility for your mouth. Don’t let your mouth run like a wild horse and hurt your partner.

When it’s about your needs in bed, choose your words and phrases sensitively.  Tell them what you prefer, don’t expect miracles instantly.

If you start having sex more frequently, your partner will be tired. Over time, they’ll build stamina, so bear with them… and grow together.

3. Add new elements  

With your partner’s consent, add exotic sex toys and new ways to enjoy sex. Suggest giving them oral and ask them to return the favor. If they’re not into it, don’t force them.

Take things slow and learn more about your bodies on the go. Focus on spicing up roleplays, sexy outfits, or even risqué locations to have sex.

Introduce the new elements slowly, don’t overwhelm or scare your partner.

4. Don’t focus on orgasms

Another mistake that ruins sexual pleasure is “orgasm”. Not orgasm itself, but your mind… Why do you need mutual orgasm? Why does your happiness lie in orgasm alone?

No denying that orgasm feels good, I have nothing against it… but, what about the remaining experience? Don’t stress on orgasm… enjoy how every caress, fondle and kiss feels.

Sex isn’t a one-stop journey… immerse in every feeling.

5. Consider opening your marriage

When sex is an important part of your life but your spouse can’t satisfy you, discuss how open marriage sounds to you.

This is not a compulsory step, it’s one of the possible options to consider.

Don’t force an open marriage on your partner… or, make your partner choose between open marriage and divorce.

Find relationship satisfaction together with consent. Further, settle on proper rules and boundaries if you do.

If nothing works out, let’s know…

When should you seek professional help for sexual frustration?

Seek therapists when things don’t improve, it hurts your finances, relationships, or life.

Followed all the possible steps but still feel sexually frustrated? Time to speak with sex therapists and learn the real issue.

A sex therapist can help you cope with trauma or fear from past sexual acts. Find the solution to your sexual impulses to lead a better life.

Other times when you must seek a mental health counselor are when…

  • It impacts your financial condition
  • You mistreat your partner or other loved ones because of it
  • You act impulsively when your feel sexually frustrated… which you usually don’t. For instance, you slack in your work or break your partner’s trust.

Have something more to ask? We aren’t done yet, let’s move on to…


Sexual frustration is a complex topic… It isn’t a medical condition, but it impacts your life in diverse ways. You’re bound to have more questions swarming in your head!

So, let’s find more info here…

1. Can sexual frustration cause health conditions?

Sexual frustration doesn’t hurt health, so don’t fret!

However, sex does help you in quite a few ways. Research shows that physical and sexual intimacy might diminish cortisol (stress hormone) production, boosts serotonin (happy hormone), control heart rate, act as a pain reliever.

Contrarily, you might feel a sense of isolation due to a lack of sex. This leads to physical and emotional health concerns in the long run.

In men, sexual frustration might result in blue balls (epididymal hypertension). During arousal, blood rushes to the male genitals and seems bluish.

It’s when men can’t orgasm even after being aroused. It’s minor discomfort and soon goes away after orgasming.

2. Is it normal to experience sexual frustration?

Totally and entirely!

Despite your gender, you might feel sexually frustrated whenever you don’t have a satisfying sex life. However, sometimes it’s not the lack of quality of sex but our expectations from it.

Media twisted your and my idea of sex with lots of fluid thrown at lightning speed here and there. When you get down to reality, it might not appeal much to you and cause sexual frustration. 

If this sounds similar, engage with ethical porn more.

3. What happens when a woman is sexually frustrated?

Though it’s not that men and women have a distinct reaction to sexual frustration, some women might react differently.

Also, if a man shows similar symptoms, it’s natural.

However, these are more pronounced in women. She might…

– Tell you “I’m fine… don’t worry”
– Deny you sex because you can’t satisfy her, so why should she?
– Fantasize about past lovers and compare with current partner
– Avoid the topic and masturbate for relief
– Seek other virtual or real-life partners

4. Can you get a headache from being sexually frustrated?

Sex boosts the serotonin production in your body. Serotonin is a happy hormone and is connected with depression and headaches.

Contrarily, some people get headaches when they’re close to climax. It sounds funny and embarrassing so many people don’t tell their partners about the issues.

But if you think your headache is due to or lack of sex, it’s time to schedule a check-up.

5. What happens to your body when you’re sexually frustrated?

Though, there are no health issues, sexual frustration or lack of enough sex can do a few things to the human body… which aren’t detrimental (at least for now).

A study showed that rats developed new brain cells after sex. So, you might impact your smartness potential if you’re sexually frustrated.

Also, women might become less sensitive to sexual activities. Lack of sexual activities results in issues with arousal and orgasms.

Over to you…

It’s hard to deal with sexual frustration with social stigma and taboo about the topic. People harmlessly joke about it… without understanding the grave circumstances in the sufferer’s life.

Well, don’t feel ashamed because of the lame jokes. If you figured out you’re sexually frustrated, step up to fix it. Seek professional help when things don’t look reassuring. 

Remember, the stigma attached to sexual frustration won’t save your relationships or life. Your choices will make a difference… so live your life your way.

Though not an illness, sexual frustration is a common issue. If you didn’t spot your reason here, but believe it’s sexual frustration… don’t ignore your intuition!

Are you interested to know more about ‘Sexual Hypnosis’ then click here?