So, you’re looking for dating red flags…
You may want to tread carefully so you don’t regret it later…
I’m glad that you’re ready to make a difference in your life… and so thrilled that I can help you on this journey to a wonderful dating life with my think-piece.
Well, most of us make mistakes in our dating lives either because we’re desperate for a partner (don’t deny it!) or because we’re wearing rose-tinted glasses.
This leads to massive embarrassing situations down our dating history.
So, for a better experience, let’s jump right in…
…hope you find the perfect person for you soon.
What is a Dating Red Flag?
Dating red flags are small hints that are a reflection of major issues in the future if you were to enter a serious relationship with someone.
In your quest for a loving romantic relationship, you may come across multiple bad dates. Your date may have some issues and it might still work out. So, don’t get confused about the issues and red flags.
Dating red flags are actually warning signs that your date has serious problems. They might have emotional problems, addictions, serious financial crunches, anger issues, or even violent tendencies.
The problems are so bad that they must either address them instead of dating or way past the point of solving them.
Red flags in your date may pose a threat to your future if you enter a committed relationship with them. These signs show up in many ways like physical, verbal, emotional, or personality issues.
Can’t wait to be careful of dating red flags? Let’s find the common ones here…
Dating Red Flags
Whether you started dating someone completely new or knew your date since childhood but just started dating, some basic signs will always show you whether they’re a good catch or not.
Before you develop any feelings, look out for these…
1. They promote isolation
If your date always prioritizes you over their family and friends, you might get flattered.
However, that’s no less than a red flag as they’re ready to forget about the important people in their life for you – someone they recently met. Even worse, they’ll demand the same from you.
2. They shower insults as jokes
If your date frequently puts you or anyone else down amidst a conversation jokingly… that’s not a good sign.
They’re a toxic person and only want to feel superior to others through such underhanded means.
3. They’re a workaholic
Work is important undoubtedly but if they always cancel dates for work and meetings, it’s a warning of a poor work-life balance.
If you become steady someday in the future, you or your family won’t be their priority. Think again!
4. They withhold affection as they please
You can’t behave lovey-dovey when you’re dissatisfied with your partner.
However, when you do something dissatisfying and your date stops behaving normally or showering love like the usual, instead of verbally saying what’s wrong… that’s a red flag. They’ll always leave you figuring out what’s wrong and manipulate you into pleasing them.
5. Everything MUST BE of their choice
When you plan a date, who chooses the venue or activity? If it’s always your date’s favorite places and yours never get a chance, they’re pretty selfish.
Selfishness is another major red flag for dating.
6. They tiptoe around the important stuff
When you ask your date important life details, do they consistently evade the topics?
For instance, do they bury your questions about their finances and occupation with something that appears to be more important? Or, do they make you feel guilty for asking? That’s a red flag right there.
7. They force you to love them
As soon as you start dating, if they force you to prove your love to them even when you say you didn’t fall in love yet, that’s a major problem.
They don’t care if you feel comfortable or not and even criticize you for not being “open-minded enough”.
8. You gotta update like AI
If a date seems dissatisfied with you and constantly forces you to change your appearance, personality, or any other aspect about yourself… yet they won’t leave you, that’s a huge red flag. They’ll cling and rip off your self-esteem to feel superior.
9. They can’t be respectful to your folks
When you introduce your date to your friends and family or make them spend time together, does your date avoid or insult them?
If they’re rude and disrespectful to a date’s loved ones, it shows they aren’t worth your time.
10. They touch your phone without permission
If a date snoops around your phone to check your texts, emails, or phone records or demands you to show them… another red flag! They have major trust issues and might even believe they own you, can’t respect your personal space, or that it’s normal to behave this way.
11. Your accomplishments are always small
When you succeed in something in life… whether it’s small or big, if your date tells you it’s not important, honey you deserve better.
Nobody has the right to make you feel bad about your accomplishments. If they can’t be happy, they aren’t the ones.
12. They’re obsessed with domination outside the bedroom
If your date can’t fight on fair grounds or tries to gain the upper hand in everything, that’s a major red flag.
This must be your bottom line, so don’t allow such people in your life any longer.
13. You’re too afraid to speak out
While dating them, if you feel uncomfortable or emotionally drained whenever something goes wrong and avoid working on little issues, a long-term relationship with them will be toxic.
If their lousy behavior scares you in the early stages, there’s no future with them. But even for now, you’ll only close down further.
14. They exhibit controlling behavior
If your date tries to control every part of your life or if there’s even a hint of emotional, verbal, or physical abuse to gain control over your life, this isn’t worth the effort.
There’s a good chance you won’t make it out safe, so break free now.
15. Booze comes first
Pay attention to your date’s alcohol consumption. Is alcohol only an end-of-the-day relaxing routine? Or, do they go overboard and regularly get high?
If it’s the latter, that’s an alarming red flag. Addiction is one of the top reasons behind abuse and broken relationships.
16. They love bomb you
Does your date spoil you with lots of gifts, attention, and love? If it seems too real to be true, trust me that it is.
Your date is love bombing you and this isn’t a healthy dating sign. They definitely have some issues that they must resolve soon.
17. They have too many secrets
Nobody opens up to their date instantly. However, if you’re dating someone for some time but a chunk of their life is still mysterious to you, that’s a definite red flag.
If they can’t tell you about certain parts of their life, they know they’re wrong.
18. They want to get married right away
The journey from dating to relationship and marriage is a long one.
However, if your date skips all of these steps and tells you they can’t wait to get married or demands a committed relationship from you, RED FLAG! Move on!
19. They recently broke up
When did your date break up? If they didn’t even take a month to heal from their past relationship, they’re bad news.
This person is either a serial dater or you’re a rebound for them. They probably want to live their past relationship dreams through you.
20. You hardly get the chance to speak
When you spend time with your date, how much do each of you communicate?
If your date always talks more and leaves you no room to express yourself, that’s not a good sign. They’re so self-centered that they forget to listen to you.
21. They’re financially doomed
If your date admits to having too many debts, asks you to pay for their expenses, or carries too many credit cards, they’re financially wrecked.
They’re a red flag from head to toe… just leave before you’re submerged in debts too.
22. They leech off their parents
If your date uses their parents’ credit cards, lives with their parents, or refuses to work because of their parents’ steady income from their business… that’s a rich brat and they’re not eligible for a real relationship. They might depend on you if their parents go broke.
23. They aren’t aware of social behavior
It’s still okay if people let out their crazy sides in private.
However, it’s important to remember certain social norms like dressing appropriately or talking respectfully, you’re definitely uncomfortable with them. This red flag won’t change for a lifetime, so reconsider your choices.
24. They’re too dramatic for your nerves
Drama is the driving force to live for some people. They believe a day without controversies and emotional turmoil is boring.
These people have red flags written all over them. Forget about relationships, dating with such a person will be no less than hell.
25. They play games for attention
If you’re serious about your life, you can’t invest an exhausting amount of focus just to make your dating scene right.
A person playing hard to get and that doesn’t respect your time isn’t worth your attention. Many don’t even notice this red flag as it seems so innocent initially.
26. Sex turns their mood dark
In the early stages of dating, sex isn’t a good idea.
However, if you’re seeing them for a long time and they don’t refuse to have sex with you or shame you for asking it, that’s a total red flag. You two have completely clashing sexual needs, it’ll become an issue later.
27. They’re too selfish in the bedroom
If your partner asks for sex, asks you to go down on them, but never returns the favor, they don’t respect you at all.
Not to dishearten you, but your date only desires you for happening sex life and nothing more.
28. Your interests are never interesting
When you talk about your life goals, dreams, or hobbies, how does your date behave? Do they seem absent at the moment?
If they hardly say anything about it or say “You must change your interests”, that says enough about their lack of commitment.
29. They hide you from their folks
If you started dating for a while but they make it a point so you never hang out around their friends and family that’s a huge issue.
Perhaps, they won’t invite you even if they need a plus one for an event, they probably don’t have the best intentions for you.
30. They gaslight you
If your date makes you question reality, your memories, and your choices, that’s gaslighting: an emotional abuse form. Any form of abuse is a major red flag, so cut ties before it’s too late.
39. Following through isn’t important for them
Do they frequently promise to meet, call, or do other things, but never stick to their word?
This red flag brings major trust and priority issues in your date’s life. They’re immature and don’t care whether you’re hurt.
40. You dislike their friends
“Friends are the family we choose” you probably heard this saying. So, if you get a bad vibe from their friends, remember that they like these people and get a good vibe from them. They’re probably like them too.
41. They cancel without new plans
If your date frequently cancels plans but never tells you when you’ll meet next or forces you to make the next plan, they have no respect for your time and expectations.
This red flag shows that they don’t care even if you’re hurt.
42. They always have sudden “prior commitments”
Your date will normally prioritize their family members and work before you. However, if they’re busy every weekend when they neither told you about any work or family gathering throughout the week, such excuses are fishy.
43. Their stories don’t align
If your date says they went to a brother’s wedding last month and afterward say they don’t have a brother… such contradicting stories show this person is probably a fake.
Tread lightly as this person only wants to take advantage of you. They’re probably pretending throughout.
Online Dating Red Flags
We all have a different online persona… we’re everything that we aspire to be in reality. We seem more assertive, confident and collected and there’s nothing wrong with it.
However, if someone wants to fool or take advantage of you through dating apps or social media, that’s the issue. So, let’s get a better look here…
44. They always need emergency funds
One of the top online dating red flags is when your match asks you for money.
They don’t know you long enough to get your contact number, but they’ll be at an utter disadvantage in a foreign state and seek financial aid from you.
45. They say “I’m trouble”
When someone says that they have issues and aren’t your cup of tea, trust the facts.
Just because you feel they’re a breath of fresh air and want to teach them to love themselves, you might get in major trouble. Think twice before you trap yourself.
46. The “I love you” comes too fast
Another online dating app red flag is when they try to emotionally manipulate their victims to take advantage of them.
They’ll say “You’re the most beautiful person in the world” and “This has to be true love”.
47. They never show their face
Catfishing takes different forms in online dating apps. If you see a dating profile without pictures, swipe left.
If your match looks like a model but doesn’t send you their picture and is never ready to video call, that’s your catfish! Many people fail to notice such red flags.
48. The profile is full of vague answers
Many dating app profiles have particular questions about a person’s interests, profession, and what they want on their date.
If someone only has unclear or short answers, they’re probably confused about their life. RED FLAG ALERT!
49. They always flatter you
On dating sites, you match to know whether you and your date are a good match.
However, if your date only showers a bunch of flattering pickup lines, they aren’t looking for an exclusive relationship anytime soon. This red flag is a no-no for serious or exclusive daters.
50. Their pictures are too bold
On online dating sites, if someone has bold and hot pictures, they’re a walking red flag.
They only want to attract you towards their body because either their personality sucks or they’re a hooker or gold digger. Move past them!
51. They’re always in a different time zone
Whenever you try to call them, do they never receive your calls? Perhaps they say they’re in a different time zone and were busy or sleeping.
If this happens repeatedly but it’s a local dating website, that’s an alarming red flag as they’re lying.
52. There’s someone else in their pictures
If they look quite intimate with another person in some of the pictures, your date isn’t single or is still in an unsure relationship.
They’re snooping behind their partner, looking for a unicorn, or using you as filler while they’re on a break.
53. Their political stances are clashing
If your date’s bio says they support a political party you dislike, unmatch them right that instant.
This might not be a huge red flag, but it has the potential to ruin your relationship later, if you proceed to that phase. It’s the same for other basics like your favorite football team and stuff.
54. They’re nowhere on social media
Everyone looks up their online date at least once on social media platforms like Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram, and Twitter.
If you don’t find their account even on one social media platform, CATFISH ALERT! Don’t let them fool you anymore.
55. They communicate through social media only
If you meet your date through social media, commonly you won’t jump to other forms of communication fast.
However, if it’s been a while but they aren’t ready to call you or meet up, it’s a red flag. You’re probably a catfish victim in this scenario.
Dating a Divorced Person Red Flags
If your date experienced a broken marriage recently, they might have some emotional baggage with them. However, who doesn’t have emotional baggage?
So, it’s not that you can’t date a divorcee, but things might not be so simple when they exhibit subtle red flags like these…
56. Insulting their ex is a ritual
If a divorcee date talks ill about their ex-partner early in the dating scene, you never know when they might say the same about you to their next partner.
They must be pretty obsessed about their ex to say it in the dating phase.
57. They have no complaint about the marriage failure
Contrarily, they hardly have anything to say at all about their failed marriage and family, that pretty much says their ex did the right thing to leave them and they agree.
Divorcees need a balanced amount of complaints about their marriage.
58. They’re sarcastic about everything
Sometimes divorcees become extremely sarcastic and bitter because of their experience.
If their sense of humor bites your skin, they have lots of contempt for them. This red flag can negatively impact your mental health so steer clear of them.
59. They’re still afraid of being hurt
It’s understandable if your date can’t forget the hurtful feelings from their last marriage.
However, if they have trust issues and insecurities because of it, you can’t expect them to commit to you later on. They must seek a therapist instead of dating.
60. They had many spouses
If your date admits that they had multiple spouses or that they divorced multiple times, that’s another red flag.
They don’t take marriage, a holy bond, seriously. There might be serious issues with the way they handled their marriages and that says a lot about their character.
61. They say they’re separated
If a divorced person says they’re separated from their spouse, instead of divorced…
Another red flag, The words aren’t synonymous and it’s a surefire sign they still have their ex-spouse in their heart or the divorce procedure isn’t complete yet. You might get your heart broken big time!
62. They mention their ex after drinking
If your date mentions their ex after drinking or drinks a lot to forget about their ex-spouse, they need immediate attention.
Further, they’re just not fit for dating. They want to use you to overcome the pain… much like a rebound or revenge on their ex.
63. Their relationship with their children isn’t healthy
Children know their parents the best, so if this person’s kids don’t visit them at all after the divorce or the parent-child relationship is on the rocks, that’s a warning sign.
This person probably did wrong to them and they can’t forgive them.
64. Their contact with the ex is excessive
When spouses with children divorce, they stay in touch for co-parenting.
However, if they excessively reach out to their ex-spouse, they’re probably still stuck in the past. If you ever fall in love with them, they may not prioritize you enough.
65. They cheated earlier
If your date says their cheating on their spouse led to the divorce, don’t ever ignore this sign. A cheater never changes their way, so tread mindfully.
This person may not stay true to you either, step away before getting your heart broken.
Dating a Single Parent Red Flags
Whether your date ever got married or not, if they have kids, that’s a hell lot of responsibilities. You’ll probably never get their 100% attention. However, if you’re understanding enough, I’m glad!
But even dating a single parent doesn’t promise you a serious and true partner. So, let’s see how it is here…
66. They’re involved in a dirty divorce
If your date admits they’re stuck in a dirty divorce settlement, they’ll be busy with legal issues for a while.
They don’t have character issues but they’ll keep you hanging for the long run and your dating life will be at a stand-still for a while.
67. Their ex or divorce is a hot topic
Whenever you go out on dates, if they talk about the divorce, their ex’s new partner, or praises them, you’re with the wrong person. They aren’t emotionally available to have a good time with you.
68. You’re more important than their child
A single parent’s first and foremost commitment must be their kids. If your date prioritizes you over their kids’ sports day, it’s so messed up.
They aren’t fit to be a parent at all because their life and fun are more important to them.
69. They wanna do the intro with the kids sooner
Single parents MUST NEVER introduce a casual date to their children. If the kids get attached to the date and the couple splits, they’ll be emotionally traumatized.
If your date rushes you to meet their kid, they reek of red flags and bad parenting.
70. They say you’d be a good parent
In the early stages of dating, if someone says you’ll be a great dad/mom, they’re hunting for a parent for their child, not a partner. Dating a single parent must be no different from dating someone without kids.
71. They need your help with their drama
If a single parent gets involved in a mess with their ex, they must handle it alone. If they seek you to resolve the situation when you’re only dating (not in a serious relationship), that’s boundary-crossing: a major red flag!
72. They’re still immature
Single parents have major responsibilities regarding their kids.
However, if they can’t take it seriously and only focus on having fun by themselves with excess spending or illegal; activities, their priorities are out of whack. Such red flags are totally not cool
73. They hardly refuse you
Whenever you ask them out for a date, are they always available? So, they never refuse you for their kids even when they don’t have anyone to depend on.
They probably don’t pay enough attention to their kids… another red flag.
74. You’re paying for their kids
Single parents must provide for their kids by themselves. However, if they depend on you – someone they met recently – that’s an alarming signal. You might have financial issues if you ever commit to them.
75. Their kids are “baggage” to them
If a single parent calls their child “baggage”, that’s the most hurtful thing for a child.
They don’t deserve to be a parent, but they still got custody of their kids (if they’re divorced) or had kids even when they aren’t ready. They aren’t even dating material!
76. They say they need to repair their family
If your date says “I want to complete my family”, they’re clearly stuck in some societal picture of “family”, instead of feeling happy with what they have.
This is a huge red flag because they’ll soon urge you to get married.
77. They say they don’t need a new parent
If your single parent date particularly mentions in their dating bio or in person that they don’t want to date another single parent, that’s a bad sign.
They probably think kids are a burden so they don’t want another person with similar burdens.
78. They don’t have a proper parenting plan
If your date hardly disciplines their kids, they don’t care about their kids’ future or the impact on society.
Further, if you’re a single parent too or might have kids with them ever, their future is also on the line.
Dating a Widow Red Flags
If you plan on dating a widower, first wanna consider how long back they lost their spouse. You mustn’t go for someone that lost their spouse not even a month back.
After all, grieving takes a lot of time. Responsibly choose a date and only then look for red flags like these…
79. They don’t try to heal
After a spouse’s death, the grieving process of a widower is quite important.
However, if your widow date is still not over grieving yet seek dates, that’s a crazy red flag. They won’t take the time to heal at all and make you suffer along with them.
80. They don’t want new memories
Whether it’s a date spot or a room full of memories, if your date won’t allow you to spoil or rewrite their spouse’s memories, that’s not particularly bad.
However, it’s still a red flag because you must always be careful to not anger them by entering forbidden territories.
81. They’re holed up in their home
A widow may stay back home to heal. However, if a widower always asks you for at-home dates, they fear showing others that they’re dating or they want to hide your presence from the world… This is a disrespectful red flag.
82. They can’t love you whatsoever
If a widower refuses to open their heart and uses their spouse’s death as an excuse, why did they even seek you to date? The dating scene seems quite glum and you deserve much better.
83. You’re similar to their deceased spouse
If your date says you resemble their late spouse in looks, personality, or anything else, run. They aren’t interested in you.
They want to connect with their deceased spouse this way. Things will become pretty nasty before they realize you’re not them.
84. They share stories of their dead partner
If a widow brings up their dead spouse all the time, they’re still not over the grief. They’ll always be the widow of Mr/Mrs. XYZ, but if they can’t respect your time and connect with you, they need to heal more.
85. They won’t remove shrines to the late partner
A late partner’s shrine might be their picture, clothes, or anything else.
As per Abel Keogh, a remarried widower and relationship coach, if your date doesn’t remove the shrines when things get more serious, they’re not entirely invested in you.
Dating at 50 Red Flags
If you’re 50 or above, no offense but you’re probably not as updated about modern dating situations. I believe dating is possible even at the age of 90, but you must have enough ideas so that nobody takes advantage of you.
So, here goes how to protect yourself from modern scammers…
86. They ghosted you
Being in your 50s, you might not know about the evils of dating in the current world.
When a date meets you for a while and then disappears for good is called ghosting. If they resurface again like it’s no biggie, block them right away!
87. They can’t stop texting you
If someone only texts you nonstop to make up for zero calls, you might feel flattered.
However, this is a no-brainer red flag because this person is probably not real. They might be a scammer in disguise and probably lied about their gender too.
88. You’re never a priority
If your date has kids and grandkids, they can’t give you enough time. However, if you feel their outings for retirees are much more important than a date with you, that’s another poor red flag.
89. Bad habits from their youth still persist
At such an age, if a date still exhibits poor habits from their youth like smoking, bad routines, etc.
You might feel glad and try to take care of them, but don’t be flattered. Respect yourself and you’re not their caretaker.
Early Dating Red Flags
If you just started dating and don’t plan to waste much time on the wrong person, I don’t blame you.
There are too many toxic people ready to take advantage of your time and energy and leave you with an experience that makes you hate dating. So, to prevent that, keep these in mind…
90. They order for you
On a first date, if they insist on ordering for you, that’s a red flag despite how cute you find it. Unless you ask them to choose for you, this shows they have controlling tendencies. They might need therapy instead of dating.
91. They don’t have any opinion
When you communicate with your date, you wanna hold a healthy conversation.
However, if they never have or express their opinions (for instance, they won’t choose their drink), they’re suffering from low self-esteem. They might be codependent and that’s definitely not good news for healthy dating scenes.
92. Your safety isn’t a priority
If your date lets you deal with creeps alone or asks you out to a shady restaurant in an unsafe location, no matter how lit it is, cancel the plans. They have zero awareness of your safety and are immature. Drop this person right now!
93. They say “I’m not like others”
If your date says they aren’t like any men/women and keeps distance from them.
They’re clearly intimidated by others’ carefree nature. This person will make you tend to them all day long like a babysitter because they can’t get along with others.
94. They look right… too much
When someone looks upwards or to the right, as per research, they’re making up lies and not recalling memories. So, if they look a lot towards their right in the early stages, you know they’re hiding something.
95. They have too many regrets or expectations
If they say “I need…” instead of “I want…”, they suffer from low self-worth. If a person uses “I wish I…” or “I feel ashamed that I…” sentences about themselves, they victimize themselves in their stories. They can’t take responsibility for their actions… someday they might blame you for something.
96. They contradict themselves
If they call themselves environmentally conscious and still use plastic cups, they’re a big fat liar. They’re all talk and no work.
They want to deceive you probably because you’re concerned with the environment. You never know how much more they’ll contradict their words.
97. They show off but are pretty cheap
If a date asks you out to a fine dining restaurant but doesn’t comfortably have food themselves, they’re just showing off.
They want to convince you that they can spend a lot on you, so you must date them seriously. Pay for your share and never see them again.
98. They habitually itemize
If they keep scores about who called/texted first, who said what weeks back, or when you ask about their plan more than once, they reply “Didn’t I already tell you this at XXth Month at HH:MM?” That’s a red flag as they can’t take a question or hold a conversation without being annoying.
99. They’re a picky eater
If they consistently criticize the food on dates, they definitely have too high expectations from everything and feel entitled to the best.
Think of an escape plan because they might criticize you next. They may seem sweet now, but the reality is not that far.
100. Their romance is fishy
If they get you an engagement ring within the first few dates, they’re not what they seem.
No sane person does that… they might be an abuser or have a sick mentality. They want you to fall in love and depend on them before they show their true colors.
101. They never have excuses for being late
People can be late to dates because of traffic and work. It’s excusable even if you hate waiting.
However, if they’re late but don’t give you the reasons, do they even care? They’re probably not half as serious and courteous to you.
102. They love what you love… always
How frequently do you hear the “same here” from them? If they pose themselves as your twin with the same taste and choices, they probably stalked you on social media to win you over. They want to manipulate you into thinking they’re your soulmate, so tread lightly.
103. They talk gross on first dates
The human body is gross but a first date doesn’t need to know your coochie smells bad. However, if your date can’t wait until they know you better and say similar stuff to you, that’s a red flag… unless you like that.
104. They focus on their phone but never text you fast
During the dates, do they repeatedly check their phone, text, or call? If they were never as attentive to you when you reached out, it’s all intentional.
They’re impolite and they don’t value your time. They have better things to attend to, so let them.
105. They’re always too friendly too fast
Another red flag is when your date tries to take a duo picture and post it online, sends friend requests to your friends, or sends your mom their favorite flowers, they have zero ideas about boundaries. Who knows, probably they wanna make an ex jealous?
106. They ask too much
A glaring dating red flag is when they discuss childhood trauma in the first few dates or ask you too many sensitive questions.
That’s too heavy for the early dating phase. Probably, they need to work on their issues because they’re so important that they talk about them.
107. They never let you pay
Initially, you’re unsure about dating someone steadily. You don’t wanna be called a gold digger or opportunist so you wanna pay your share.
However, if they don’t let you, they don’t respect your wishes and views. Don’t ignore this red flag as they might demand more in no time.
108. You got a pet name too fast
A compliment or two on the early dating scenes is really cool. However, if they regularly tell you stuff like that, they’re probably habituated to it and treat any other person similarly. It’s a red flag about their character.
109. They ordered water!
Your date asks you on a coffee date, you ordered a grande because you’re interested in having a nice chat… but if they order water only, they’re least interested in spending time with you. They’ll possibly go for a bathroom break and disappear in no time.
110. Their priorities are all over the place
Suppose it’s their friend’s marriage this weekend and you unknowingly ask them out. You probably had only one date with them.
If they offer to ditch the wedding for you, they’re super clingy. Perhaps, they also hope you’ll leave your sick parents for their date.
111. They lack commitment
If they brag about their past physical appearance and say they’re no longer as attractive because of work, they have poor self-esteem and can’t commit to their own fitness. How will this person commit to your well-being if they can’t love themselves?
112. Every topic becomes about themselves
No matter what you talk about, if your date can steal your thunder in every conversation, big red flag! They only want to feel good about themselves and don’t mind if you stop talking. They probably don’t even want to listen to you.
113. They complained about prices on the first date
Early dating scenarios must always be about knowing one another, not knowing the prices and daily expenses.
If the date put a toll on their finances, why did they choose the venue? If you didn’t force them to take you out for fancy steak, that’s a red flag.
114. They crossed their arms the whole time
Body language can be a savior in dating stories. If your date looked closed off with crossed arms, lack of eye contact, frowned brows or facing anywhere but you, that’s a red flag. They probably can’t be more transparent to show they aren’t interested.
115. They’re into negging
Negging is when someone gives you backhanded compliments like “You’re too beautiful to be 30” or “You look fabulous, but you’ll look sexy in a suit”. When someone exhibits such red flags, you’re better off without them. They want you to feel inferior and self-conscious.
116. They talk about sex too fast
If a date asks for sex too fast or forces you to accompany them to a hotel room, get away and block them. They can bring up this topic because they don’t care about your comfort at all. You deserve better than an inconsiderate person.
117. They’re jealous of you
During early dating, nobody has real romantic feelings and nobody owns the other.
However, if during the date your phone rings and your date becomes extra curious or throws a tantrum about having “backup” partners, that’s a red flag. They’ll make your life a living hell even without a serious relationship.
118. They can’t handle differences
Meeting people with different perspectives is normal while dating. However, if they can’t accept diverse opinions, that’s a major red flag.
They won’t accept the bigger picture and be particularly bad with confrontations and compromises. This is a tell-tale sign that every date thereafter will be a nightmare.
119. Everything becomes a joke
When you talk about serious matters, if your new date laughs it off, they don’t care about your emotions.
This is a red flag because they might be emotionally unavailable or fear intimacy. They use humor to innocently brush off any attachment.
120. They said they ghosted
If someone admitted to ghosting others on the first few dates, even if they sound apologetic, steer clear of this tell-tale red flag.
They secretly feel proud of it and plan to choose this cowardly method when they had enough fun with you.
121. Their eyes say you’re boring
If they seem sleepy, distracted, or seem to feel you’re a headache… they send off signals “I can’t treat you respectfully on the first date, do you think I’ll ever listen? DREAM ON!” Never give second chances when you encounter such red flags.
122. They said “I don’t want anything serious”
When someone says that phrase and you want to settle down at some point soon, a surefire red flag for you, honey! If you prefer a casual connection like FWB or NSA, this isn’t a red flag for you.
123. They go without contact after the first date
If your date doesn’t bother to catch up after the first date and doesn’t even ask if you reached home safely, that’s a living and breathing red flag for you.
You deserve much more than their half-hearted efforts to date you.
124. Drinks near their place get preference over other options
Instead of dinner, if they go for drinks, they don’t wanna put any effort even for the sake of pretense.
Further, if the bars are always near their place, they only wanna get laid. They can blame it on the booze later and tell you it was a mistake.
125. They went tipsy on the first date
Everyone wants to give their best impression on their first date. But if your date gets high instead, they have really low respect and consideration for you.
Or, they just can’t control their alcoholism. This is a serious issue both for dating and love relationships.
126. Service workers aren’t human to them
When you go out on a first date with someone, this is a thumb rule. Notice how they treat the servers. If they behave like an entitled brat, that person isn’t ready to date. They must return to preschool and learn their manners.
127. They hardly respect your boundaries
Nobody wants to stay out late or drink until they’re wasted with their new date. If you’re the same but your date can’t respect such boundaries… imagine how you might wreck your life if you enter a committed relationship with them.
They’ll always push your boundaries! They won’t stop even if you’ll casually date.
Red Flags When Dating an Older Person
Dating an older person sounds really glamorous because potential dates of your age might not be as mature.
Of course, you can’t forget that they’re much more knowledgeable about how modern life works… you get a mentor for free! However, never sidestep these red flags just for the perks…
128. Your life goals differ
An older person knows their shit much better than you. They have picture-perfect ideas of what they want in the end.
However, if you only wanna have fun in life and they plan to settle down soon, that’s a troublesome red flag.
129. Your values are too distant
If you think having a Snapchat marathon with your BFFs proves your closeness while they think social media is a waste of time, it’s not surprising. Your upbringing and values are different, but if they’re clashing, this is a total red flag… you might get into serious issues later.
130. You guys can’t compromise
When dating with huge age gaps, you need compromise and empathy.
If either or both of you stick to your ideas, that means your dating experience will be pretty poor… even if both of your ideas are equally good. The difference isn’t bad but you’ll hardly have fun together.
Dating a Narcissist Red Flags
At some point in our life, we all become a narcissist in someone’s eyes because we don’t allow others to walk all over us.
However, when you date a real narcissist, things become much worse than what people might imagine. So, let’s make sure you don’t fall prey to one here…
131. They hope you’ll worship them
If your date feels glad to spend time with you only if you compare them with Greek Gods and define them as the epitome of perfection and hope you’ll accept them like that forever, that’s a warning sign of narcissism in them.
132. They glorify them in their stories
Another red flag of a narcissist is that in their stories, they speak so highly of them and shun others.
If it’s something about their past relationship, they’ll paint their ex as evil witches/warlocks. If it’s about a date with you, they’ll recite it as if you weren’t a part of it.
133. They share an impossible secret
A conspicuous red flag of a narcissist that tells you to run for the hills is their wild secrets.
They’ll tell you they achieved something envious and they only share it with you because you’re special… they expect you to believe something so random… you better leave before you get fooled.
134. They smile with contempt
If your date smirks contemptuously as if they’re much better and worthier than you, don’t ignore it.
They don’t say it now, but they’ll make you feel inferior and less deserved in no time. That’s what narcissists thrive on… they think they can control you.
135. They want you to stick to your phone
If your date thinks they’re so important that you must answer their calls and texts instantly, that’s undoubtedly a red flag of being a narcissist.
However, narcissists show such traits only after you’re a little attached to them or you dated them for over 1-2 months.
A word from ThePleasantRelationship
So many red flags probably overwhelmed you. You might now think nobody on Earth will be as perfect to exhibit no red flag.
Well, that’s where you’re mistaken! A single red flag doesn’t make a person bad. If your date exhibits one narcissistic trait, wait for a while to check for more.
It’s even possible your date takes you to drink wine but only has water because they’re sick. So, every person is unique and their behavior is based on their life situations.
So, don’t judge them too fast and wait to think about possible reasons and their proof. Don’t assume they’re goody-two-shoes either, otherwise, you’ll ruin your experience.
Surabhi wakes up every day with a drive to craft words that can create a soulful impact. Creatively adventurous, she is always seeking to learn new skills and acquire new experiences. With a hidden soft corner for languages (especially Urdu), she writes poetry occasionally, binges on romantic shows, and LOVES to talk. A hustler, admirer, chaser, Surabhi is just another-someone who refused to give up on her dreams. She says, she is just somebody who’s trying to make herself a writer and for now, she’s just writing...