Are you wondering why would a man hide his relationship?
His secretive behavior probably makes you question his feelings for you.
Well, in this age of modern dating, men have a lot of reasons – both positive and negative – to keep their relationships under wraps.
That’s why it won’t be the best idea to judge your man too soon. So, dive right in and get all the answers!
Why Would A Man Hide His Relationship? – 20+ Reasons
Perhaps, at the beginning of your relationship, you both agreed to keep it a secret. You wanted to enjoy the thrill all on your own.
However, it’s been some time, but your boyfriend isn’t allowing you to reveal it. You want to know why, but you’re uncomfortable questioning his decision.
Well, you don’t need to guess anymore. Find out all the possible reasons here.
1. He is not sure about his feelings for you
Going public about a relationship often comes with expectations. So, he hides the relationship probably because he doesn’t want to raise your expectations. This is because he feels uncertain about his feelings being genuine or just a passing phase.
2. He is not ready for commitment
Sometimes, a man will hide the relationship just because he’s not emotionally prepared to invest in a committed relationship.
He might lack clarity about what commitment means to him or fear commitment. So, he wants a hidden relationship to buy time for introspection.
3. He’s worried you might reject him
If a man has low self-esteem or doubts his worthiness, he might fear that you will reject him once you discover his vulnerabilities.
The fear of rejection makes him pretend that he doesn’t care about feminine things – like making a relationship public.
4. The relationship is still new
Some men keep it low, especially in the early stages of a relationship.
So, he probably wants to build a deeper connection with you before involving external factors like friends and family.
He also wants to make sure that both of your feelings are genuine. After all, if things don’t work out, you both have to explain a lot to others about the breakup.
5. He fears his social circle will like you or not
Notice if there are significant differences between you and his social circle regarding background, interests, or other factors. If yes, he might fear his social circle won’t be accepted by you or vice versa.
He might also be concerned about how well you mesh with his friends and family.
6. He wants to avoid complications
If you guys are coworkers and office romance is strictly banned, revealing a relationship can lead to workplace complications.
On the other hand, if he dated your best friend, people would judge you guys if you made the relationship public.
If there are such complications, he might keep it low because of that.
7. He’s in an on-off repeat relationship with his ex
Sometimes, a man might keep his relationship with you low because he’s still involved with an ex. Perhaps it’s not steady and just another on-and-off relationship.
He may not want to hide anything from you. But he’s confused and uncertain about it.
8. His friends fought with his exes
Find out if his friends and exes ever got into serious disagreements or tensions. If yes, he hesitates because he doesn’t want to repeat those experiences.
Perhaps he believes his friends will repeat the same things and push you away.
9. He likes it when others flirt with you
Some men find it exciting when their partners get hit on. This is because it adds an element of excitement and competition to the relationship.
He enjoys it when others give you attention, but you never cheat on him.
He’s confident in your feelings and feels a sense of validation or pride because you’re his in body and mind.
10. He keeps you as the other woman
So what’s the “other woman”?
It means your man is involved in another committed relationship, marriage, or even kids. And you’re in a secretive or non-primary role.
He can’t damage his partner’s/family’s trust or cause emotional pain.
So, he keeps things low with you to use you for emotional support, validation, or companionship.
11. He is benching you
Being “benched” in a dating context is when someone keeps you on the sidelines. So, he’s stringing you along without committing to a serious or exclusive relationship.
This means that he might be looking for potential romantic interests while keeping you around.
He fears settling down in a relationship that might not meet all his needs or desires. He might desire to experience different relationships before he actually chooses one of them.
12. He is addicted to sex
If he’s addicted to sex, he might seek sexual gratification outside of the relationship. He’s treating you as an object to satiate his sex drive.
So, he can’t commit and go public because he can’t stay monogamous.
He fears publicizing it because of his fear of being exposed and facing the need for treatment.
13. He is not planning the future with you
Another reason is that he only enjoys the relationship for now. But he isn’t considering it as serious or long-term.
He likes the intimacy from you but doesn’t want to commit at all.
14. He is lying about his feelings
Some individuals enjoy the power they feel when they keep others in a state of uncertainty. They lie about their feelings, make false promises, and get involved with multiple people.
So, this man might also hide the relationship for the same. He wants all the benefits but won’t take responsibility for his actions.
15. He’s ashamed of you
He might also hide the relationship because he’s concerned about your appearance or background.
Further, he wants someone who meets certain standards – according to beauty, brains, and status. He wants to feel validated for getting a “good catch,”
16. He’s afraid of you being labeled rebound
If he broke up recently, he might be concerned that others will perceive his new relationship as a rebound. This may lead to judgments or skepticism. He wants to avoid hurting you as you may get insulted as a replacement.
17. He doesn’t like to share
This is the most common reason. He might have possessive tendencies. So, he wants to keep you to himself by hiding the relationship.
He fears that if you get to know his loved ones, you’ll try to please them and share your attention or affection with them.
18. He’s not over the past relationship
If he is still emotionally attached to his past partner, it will be difficult to fully commit to a new relationship.
He might be comparing you to his past one, leading to hesitation in fully embracing the new relationship.
Maybe he is dealing with guilt about moving on from his past partner and entering a new relationship, which restricts him from introducing you to his circle.
19. He fears the judgment of being a taboo
A relationship with a huge age gap or between former student and teacher – all of that is taboo.
So, if yours is also considered taboo in your culture or religion, that might be it.
He’s worried about societal norms, stigma, or discrimination, fearing that his relationship doesn’t conform to those standards.
He’s concerned about being the subject of gossip or rumors if his relationship becomes public.
20. He thinks he deserves better
He might have certain expectations about what a relationship should provide. And if those aren’t met, he might believe he deserves better.
21. He is avoiding unwanted drama
Some men value peace and stability. And they also believe all the drama begins on social media platforms or online communities.
He believes keeping the relationship hidden will protect it from external influences or conflicts.
A word from ThePleasantRelationship
By now, you know that there can be lots of possibilities behind his choices. He might have a genuine concern for you and the relationship. Or, he might be seriously playing with your feelings.
However, you can’t tell what’s his scenario, so don’t jump to conclusions. Instead, communicate with him and ask him to be honest.
If he doesn’t give you a satisfactory answer and still keeps things hidden, know your worth and move on!
Are you interested to know more about ‘Soul Gazing’ then click here?
Are you interested to know more about ‘Concerning Flaws In A Relationship’ then click here?
Surabhi wakes up every day with a drive to craft words that can create a soulful impact. Creatively adventurous, she is always seeking to learn new skills and acquire new experiences. With a hidden soft corner for languages (especially Urdu), she writes poetry occasionally, binges on romantic shows, and LOVES to talk. A hustler, admirer, chaser, Surabhi is just another-someone who refused to give up on her dreams. She says, she is just somebody who’s trying to make herself a writer and for now, she’s just writing...