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Why Men Pull Away – 25 Reasons and What You Should Do About it? 

Why Men Pull Away – 25 Reasons and What You Should Do About it? 

Updated on Oct 28, 2022 | Published on Oct 04, 2022

Reviewed by Julianne Cantarella, MSW, LSW , Certified Relationship Coach

Why Men Pull Away – 25 Reasons and What You Should Do About it

Women often wonder why men pull away… especially after their man, who was utterly in love with them changes for good.

Nothing went wrong… you both were comfortably living your relationship just like before, but suddenly there’s no spark anymore.

Your man doesn’t love your cute selfies or react to shared couples stories on Instagram. They reassure you everything is fine but you it’s not!

So, if this is your story, this think-piece has a lot to share.

C’mon, let’s find out whether you have any hope or not…

What is the meaning of men pulling away?

Summary
When a man acts distant and doesn’t devote enough time in a relationship, that’s when you say he’s pulling away. Even when you spend time together, it doesn’t feel right.

“Men pulling away” simply means they are starting to act distant from the relationship. It’s when he won’t spend time with you like before. He may be physically in the same place as you but emotionally, he is not.

He becomes emotionally unavailable and starts making excuses for it. This turns the relationship very toxic. Even when you get physically intimate, your instincts tell you that something is just not right. If you’re facing something similar, then your relationship is definitely at risk.

Pulling away always leads to unanswered questions and shattered expectations. Relationships break harder than they’re supposed to and play with the other partner’s emotions because they don’t know what went wrong.

So, I researched and found some of the many reasons men chose to pull away from a situationship or a relationship. Let’s see what they are:


Why men pull away? – 25 Reasons

You don’t know if they are busy or just ignoring you…whether times are really tough or he is just bluffing. Hell, you don’t even know if it’s worth pushing for answers.

There are a lot of mixed feelings that revolve around when a man pulls away. All of his actions and reactions just feel like something is off, but don’t know what.

So, I am here to help you identify the different reasons, how they feel about it and what changes you can expect in their behavior.

Make sure you stay with me through all because I might just have what you need.

1. He’s afraid of investing too much

What you feel?

You might believe that this is the best relationship you have been in. It’s not perfect, no relationship ever is but you feel blessed that there is finally someone who loves you for you. He is ready to give the efforts you deserve and everything fits perfectly well together.

How he feels?

He probably feels the same. He might be head over heels falling in love with you. But he still pulls away because he is afraid.

As much as men try to deny it, they don’t feel comfortable not being in control. When these feelings of love and emotional attachment get too intense, it starts bothering them.

The further the relationship evolves into a comfortable space, it triggers them to pull away. They get confused and anxious about whether love is something that they can handle.

How to help?

Ask him if he needs time. Give him space and ask what’s wrong. If he shares his actual feelings, guide him to be the man you believe him to be. Be kind and empathetic, I am sure he’ll understand you well.

2. You make him feel not-important

What you feel?

You have always been taught to keep men on the hook and that men often take a step back if you start putting effort. You may also feel that if you prioritize him more than anything else in your life, he will take you for granted. But that’s not how it works every time.

How he feels?

Well, you might be successful in maintaining your worth, but this surely pulls him away. He might feel like you don’t really love him and his efforts don’t matter. This might make him give up because he isn’t sure if his efforts will be reciprocated.

Men have a biological desire to be felt needed. James Buer, a relationship expert, calls it the hero instinct. They are unlikely to be with a woman who doesn’t make them feel seen.

This feeling goes beyond the sexual areas of his life. He definitely appreciates your independence, but all he needs is reciprocation.

How to help?

Stop playing chase and love him with all your might. I know you’re wired otherwise but sometimes, it is worth the risk

3. He is protecting his identity

What you feel?

You love being together. You involve him in your hobbies and constantly find out things you can do as a couple together. You support him in his dreams, attend games with him so he feels supported and that’s all you want.

How he feels?

It’s not that he doesn’t like spending time with you but in the process, he feels he is losing a part of himself.

Before getting into this relationship, he had a different identity as an individual, in all areas of his life. He met his friends, pursued his hobbies alone… and now with your involvement, he feels he is losing himself to this relationship. He wants to preserve his identity, and that’s why he is pulling away.

How to help?

Allow him space. Let him decide if he wants to go together for a few events or not. If he’s an introvert, he’ll really like this gesture.  It’ll also establish that there is mutual respect and individuality in this relationship.

4. It went too fast for him

What you feel?

You believe everything is perfect because you finally have the man of your dreams. You kissed on the first date and now you both are planning to move in. You feel the comfort around him like never before but suddenly he pulls away now.

How he feels?

He feels that the relationship is progressing too fast and he is unable to process them. No, he doesn’t want to break up nor did he fall out of love.

Rather, he feels that certain milestones need time to happen… but if done prematurely they can hamper the relationship altogether. Pulling away is his way of indicating to take things slow.

How to help?

Express that you understand his worries. Communicate about your expectations and plan your next steps accordingly. Tell him you’ll respect his privacy and won’t rush anything here on.

5. He is not into you

What you feel?

You feel good about him initiating contact. His texts give you butterflies, and a few compliments from him is enough to make your day.

But suddenly your potential love interest’s behaviors changed. He is available one minute and disappears the next.

How he feels?

It may break your heart but I have to say the truth – He thinks it was all just a moment of attraction and nothing else.

This happens because most guys aren’t emotionally mature enough to deal with their feelings. They think they like you and in a few days, they find someone more attractive and the love for you wears off.

So, they disappear hoping you will get the message.

How to help?

Don’t do anything to keep him because he has already made up his mind. Seek a closure, and if he still beats around the bush, you are totally better off alone.

6. He is emotionally unavailable

What you feel?

You feel that what you two share is special. You understand him like no other. He is vulnerable with you and that makes you fall for him every day. But when it’s the other way around, he’s always busy.

How he feels?

Understand one thing, men and women are biologically very different. Women’s brains are wired to be in touch with their emotions more deeply than men. So, in situations when you bare your heart open, he stays silent primarily because he doesn’t know how to respond. And so he tries to cope with it by pulling away.

How to help?

Never attempt to fix an emotionally unavailable guy. If he really likes you, you will never have to ask him to take that step to be there when times get tough. You can only move on and be with someone who prioritizes your needs.

7. The relationship is too easy

What you feel?

You believe it’s going really well and it can turn into a committed relationship. You respect, adore, and think about him and see a future with him 24*7. But suddenly, he acts weird when you call him, responds late to your text message, and isn’t even excited to meet you anymore. Sounds familiar?

How he feels?

I hate to say it but it’s because the relationship became too easy for him. Men love challenges especially when it comes to girls.

Women, who do not have a good relationship with themselves, often make their world about a man… and that puts them off.

Yes, you’ve heard it right… Most men love to play catch.

How to help?

If the problem is within you, heal yourself, understand your worth and then come into a relationship. This will change your perspective about life altogether. Trust me!

If he lost interest, move on.

8. He is not feeling the emotional compatibility

What you feel?

You give all of your efforts but still, the relationship doesn’t have the spark. He doesn’t connect with you the same as in the early stages of dating. There are barely any meaningful discussions or soulful love-making sessions.

How he feels?

He doesn’t have that emotional connection with you. And honestly, it has nothing to do with you or any woman whatsoever.

Women think having certain physical attributes makes men stay with them. But that’s not how it works. Men’s psychology works differently. They must experience something emotionally significant to really feel you. 

For him, if his world stops when you smile at him, that sparks an emotional connection.

How to help?

Chances are your man is not even aware of the reasons he pulls away. So, engage in a meaningful conversation. If he is still uncertain, give him space. If your absence leaves him empty, he will return but if he doesn’t, you will have your answers.

9. There’s some hidden stress

What you feel?

You feel like it’s just another phase every couple experiences. You believe it will be over soon because your relationship is strong. But he doesn’t put in the same effort as you. He lashes out at you during difficult conversations and walks out giving vague excuses.

How he feels?

He might deal with the stress he isn’t ready to let out. Since men aren’t in touch with their emotions like women, they suck at venting out as well.

During stressful times, men suddenly pull away because dealing with a relationship on top of ongoing stress becomes too much.

But, there’s nothing wrong with you or your efforts. He must deal with it on his own.

How to help?

Try to start a conversation about his current life. If he lashes out again, allow him space because when it’s all figured out he will come back to you. Do not ask him to give you time or complain about his unavailability because that will only worsen things.

10. He can feel himself changing

What you feel?

You feel like he was quirky, funny, and smart before becoming exclusive. But now there isn’t enough spark anymore. He doesn’t make those kinds of conversations and takes offense to the smallest jokes.

How he feels?

There’s more feeling involved than an explanation here. He noticed himself changing. His emotional values don’t match with you at that stage and it makes him feel ‘not good enough for you’.

His avoidant attachment style gets triggered in the relationship. 

How to help?

Honestly, there’s nothing to do here because if he feels ‘not good enough for you’, it is probably true. He made up his mind, so have “the” talk and decide what’s best for you both.

11. He is scared of commitment

What you feel?

You believe the relationship can be a long-term one. He listens to you, respects your privacy, and isn’t the ‘spend 24hrs with me boyfriend’. Sure he gets uncomfortable when commitments come into the picture, but other than that he is perfect.

How he feels?

There’s no sugar-coated way to say this but he is scared of commitment. Men are always like that. They will always want to be several girls before they actually decide to settle with one.

He acts weird when those long-term talks happen. And so to avoid it, he slowly wants to fade away from your life without making it too obvious.

How to help?

He has already made up his mind about breaking up with you, so you have nothing to do. Your man mustn’t fear committing to you. Rather, he’ll make big future plans and decide kids’ names before you even imagine. So, don’t settle for less, ladies.

12. He is overwhelmed with his feelings

What you feel?

You feel falling in love with him is easy. He makes sure to check up on you and makes you smile. He appreciates your intelligence and flirts on text messages all the time but when conversations go from making out to love, his wi-fi is suddenly down with no response.

How he feels?

He is very overwhelmed with emotions. He wants things easy and moving too fast scares him. Now, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you.

Feelings are intense, scary, and confusing sometimes. Maybe he wants things slow because moving fast causes unrealistic expectations. So, he is trying to avoid them.

How to help?

Make sure you both are on the same page. Tell him there’s no rush to dive deep in one go. Things can be slow too. Give the relationship a pause, if he really works on these emotions it will be alright soon.

13. He knows he isn’t doing it

What you feel?

You feel like the relationship is okay, but when in bed, you can’t orgasm. You even fake it because you don’t want to hurt his ego. Still, he withdraws after sex. There’s no after play and both of you just doze off.

How he feels?

He probably understands that you fake it and feels he isn’t doing it properly.

Men feel like a ‘man’ only when they can satisfy their partner in the bedroom. If he can’t, he doubts his masculinity. 

But it’s the opposite. Sometimes we don’t enjoy being intimate due to some stress, headache, or overwork. When that stress affects intimacy, his natural male ego gets hurt. He pulls away after sex because he doesn’t know what went wrong.

How to help?

Don’t wait for him to pull away after sex. Instead, talk about it beforehand. Share it if you’re stressed or if you want to try something new. With open communication, sex can be so much more passionate.

14. There’s too much going on for him

What you feel?

Do you ever feel like you’re in a phase where everything is total crap?

You feel nothing is right with your man’s life but you are sure it will be alright. Both of you will come out stronger than before and it’s just ‘a phase’.

How he feels?

He feels like crap because life got too uncomfortable for him. Moreover, a serious relationship is too much. He just wants to leave everything and get away for a while. So, he pulls away.

How to help?

Just be there, give him his space and let him vent out. He isn’t doing this for fun and might actually need your help. Remind him that it will eventually get better if he takes it one day at a time.

15. He has got other options

What you feel?

With him you feel like online dating isn’t so bad. He spends time talking to you, knowing and understanding you. Maybe sometimes he replies late even when he is online. You don’t mind because his presence feels good.

How he feels?

You are on top of his text chain, but not on his mind. If you have met him on a dating site or aren’t exclusive yet, he probably talks to other girls too. He likes spending time with you but nothing beyond that.

How to help?

Don’t do anything here. A high-valued woman like you must be with someone who has eyes for you only. He must prioritize you without you having to seek it. So, if he is playing games let him do that alone.

16. He doesn’t want to get hurt

What you feel?

You feel certain things in your relationship must be mended. You want to communicate about it because your relationship is very important to you. But he just avoids it. He is hypersensitive to issues and wants to stay away instead of solving them.

How he feels?

He probably feels that you are not happy with him. Maybe he experienced several heartbreaks in his life and doesn’t want to repeat that again. Difficult conversations make him feel you would break up so he pulls away.

How to help?

Clear the air first by saying you don’t want to end the relationship. You just want to solve issues in your relationship. Calm him down and let him know that you are in this together. Yet if he doesn’t want to work, let him do his own thing because your mental health is important.

17. He wants his independence

What you feel?

You love the passion of the relationship. You like to spend more time with him because he must feel included in everything. Your world became more about him but you still feel a distance. Why?

How he feels?

He just wants his independence. His life is beyond the relationship and he needs time to live that. He feels bad about neglecting you but doesn’t want to compromise his privacy and that’s why he acts distant now.

How to help?

Some men get uncomfortable because relationships bring change, and you have no role to play in that. But if you also think it’s moving too fast and want to live a life beyond each other, it can surely help to retain that lost connection.

18. He feels unworthy of love

What you feel?

He treats you like a queen and makes you feel on top of the world. Love comes naturally for both of you but when you show love, he becomes emotional and distances himself.

How he feels?

This might be the best relationship for him after years of heartbreaks, getting betrayed, and being ghosted. Due to his past, he believes he’s unworthy of your love.

He doesn’t know how to handle such positivity in a relationship and it makes him uncomfortable. So instead, he decided to pull away as he doesn’t want to jinx what you both share.

How to help?

As a partner, you can only support him through his tough times. Share your love, be there emotionally and make him understand that love is not something to be worried about. He deserves it and you will be there with him through all thick and thin.

19. He is mixing up love and lust

What you feel?

You feel the passion of this relationship to your core.  Every day is exciting and fun with him. You love his attention and he loves touching your lips. You know it’s love yet he never admitted it (or worse, he kisses you to shut you up).

How he feels?

The reason he is with you right now is because you are irresistible to him. A man often confuses lust with love only to regret later.

He feels closer to your body, not your heart. He doesn’t even realize this yet, but this will probably end soon… as soon as he finds someone more attractive.

How to help?

Don’t stay with a man who falls in love with your body and not your soul. Someone out there prays to be with a girl like you, so leave him and find someone who actually wants you more than anything else in this world.

20. He is really busy

What you feel?

Things were going really well in the initial stages but now you don’t understand what’s wrong. He doesn’t answer your texts, doesn’t want to hang out, and there’s hardly any physical intimacy anymore.

How he feels?

There can be two sides to this. Maybe he is at the peak of his life where he needs to work hard. He hates it but he can’t help it.

Or maybe he just uses this as an excuse to get away from you. He has probably made up his mind about breaking you and wants to fade away slowly.

How to help?

Find out if he is actually busy or not. If he has too many things to deal with, give him space and tell him that you’re there. But if it’s the opposite, then you must walk off.

21. He has no tolerance for the emotional stuff

What you feel?

For you, he is the handsome hunk everyone wants to be with, but he only wants you. He loves it when you talk about hanging out or going away for a weekend, but hates it when you get even a tad bit emotional.

How he feels?

He doesn’t like emotional melodrama. Maybe because he has never been in an environment where healthy emotions were a thing. But that doesn’t mean it’s your fault. A relationship is built with emotional intimacy first. This may be new to him, so he lashed out during those conversations.

How to help?

Ask him if he needs any professional help. If he agrees, take him to a counselor to help him overcome his emotional issues. But if this is a toxic trait and he makes you feel bad about your emotions, he’s not worthy.

22. He doesn’t see a future with you

What you feel?

For you, this is it. You can see a whole future with him. You can see going to jobs together and building a life together. Maybe he isn’t open to the “future” talks now but you’re sure he will be with a little bit more push-and-pull.

How he feels?

He is attracted to you and loves spending time with you but he isn’t sure about a future with you. Men know exactly what they want and you don’t fit right in. So, he doesn’t want to get your hopes up and instead pulls away.

How to help?

You cannot help a man who doesn’t want a future with you. Rather, ask him directly. If he beats around the bush, he doesn’t want you. You really don’t need him, girl. I am sure you will have the brightest future even without him. 

23. He is losing control

What you feel?

You are an emotionally mature person. You like when there’s mutual love and respect in the relationship. You like making future plans, planning new year weekends and everything else. But every time you talk to him he feels anxious and pulls away. Why?

How he feels?

He feels as if he is not in control. Before you came into the picture, he did everything in his own way. But now everything has to go by you and this change is making him uncomfortable.

Men want to be in control of things 24*7. They feel secure in relationships that way. So, they get defensive if things go in the opposite direction.

How to help?

Include him in important discussions. Ask his opinions and let him call the shots on a few aspects of your life. This will make him feel valued in the relationship and eventually he will find his way back to you. But if he wants total control… Girl, that’s a big red flag.

24. He thinks sex is everything

What you feel?

Sex is definitely one of the most important parts of a relationship but not the ONLY part. You get all nasty on the bed but there are also days when you just want to cuddle. But he seems uncomfortable with the latter.

How he feels?

He thinks sex is everything in a relationship and if you’re in the phase where you don’t do it every day, he feels the spark is lost.

Men, who aren’t in touch with their emotional side often find these superficial reasons to end things with their partners.  

How to help?

Tell him how sex is not the only thing in a relationship. If he understands and agrees, you will soon find him on the same page as you but if not, it’s time to call it quits.

25. He wants to work on himself

What you feel?

You are a woman of high standards. You love this man and want him to step up because that’s what a healthy relationship is all about. You like that he works on himself and wants to be the best version of himself with every passing day. But in the process, he becomes distant, why?

How he feels?

He really, truly, wholeheartedly loves you. He wants to be everything you expect him to be. He is maintaining his identity but not at the cost of this relationship.

This is probably the healthiest reason behind a man pulling away. He finally realized it is you who he wants and that’s why he wants to be the best version of him… for you.  

How to help?

Let him have his space. Tell him you will love and support him till the end of the time. I am sure it will motivate him to do more.

So, your man is pulling away but you’re not sure about what you should do next? Don’t worry, and follow me…


What to do when a man pulls away?

When a man pulls away, you’re bound to feel rejected and horrible about yourself. You feel he is trying to play chase but that’s not the case, not always. So, let’s find the best way to approach the situation…  

1. Give him some space

When he withdraws, he might just need some space, so give him that. If you pull him back and insist on more time together, it won’t help. Understand his feelings and try to support him.

This space might also help him realize where he is going wrong and eventually he will return to your life and make things better.

2. No silence

Space doesn’t mean you can’t or won’t communicate. You might not see him but that doesn’t mean you need to shut him out.  

So, find out what kind of space he needs. Maybe he needs space but wouldn’t mind you checking up on him. So, even if it’s difficult for you, keep faith in him to make the right decision.

3. Convince him

When he pulls away, you may feel angry but try to approach him calmly. This won’t be easy. Your feelings are just as valid as his. But if you like him and think he is just wobbling, it won’t do any harm. 

Show him that, despite his internal struggle, you’ll support him. It’ll encourage him to open up about his feelings.

4. Support him

If a man pulls away because he feels you won’t support his life goals, let him know he’s wrong.

Reassure him that you will support him in all his decisions. You will stand as his biggest cheerleader and you both together can achieve anything. I’m sure this will make him feel better and he will come right back into your arms.

5. Keep things between you

When a man pulls away, maybe he doesn’t want you to involve others in the matter. So, don’t do that.

Instead, show him warmth like never before and there are chances that he will retreat.

6. Trigger the hero instinct in him

When your man pulls away, make him realize that being with him is better than anything. Trigger something deep inside him… something he craves more than love or sex.

Make him realize that his presence makes you smile and with his arm around you, you feel protected. If he feels that he has your admiration and respect, the ‘hero instinct’ will only bring you closer.

7. Just ask him

When he pulls away without any reason, ask him. Don’t pretend that everything is fine… it won’t end well. Most people grow apart from each other because it hurts to know the reason. But, you must calmly approach him.

It might be difficult for you but act maturely and understand that his answers don’t determine your worth. Ask him what’s wrong and if he wants to go away…. my dear, let him.

8. Reassure him

If he is scared of commitment or feels that things are going too fast, reassure him. Ask him to take a step back and calm down.

This will help him realize that getting overwhelmed is okay but it isn’t right to end the relationship.

Let him know that you really like him and care about him. I hope that helps to get over his ‘fear’.

9. Accept the reality

When a man pulls away, it hurts. But sometimes, there is nothing you could have done. He’ll break up with you anyway. So, just accept it. Don’t let it affect your worth. Don’t keep a scared commitment phobic man in your life.  

Believe that you loved him but he never did and there is nothing that can make him come back. Be strong, because that is who you are. I know it will be tough but you got this.

 10. Find yourself again

If a man does not appreciate you in his life and pulls away, just move on dear. No calls, no follow-ups, no conversations. I know you are hurt and lost.

Healing is never easy, sometimes you will relive those memories and break apart. But this shall pass. It’s time to focus on yourself and do things that make you feel alive. Cherish your relationship with yourself before anyone, and make sure that you’re alright, happy, and thriving. Okay? okay!

But wait, if you want to dive deeper into his reasons for pulling away, here’s what science says…


The psychology behind why men pull away

Summary
Men are raised to sacrifice their emotions from birth. But when a romantic relationship revives it, they feel scared and pull away. Alternatively, it might be because they don’t want to lose control over themselves and their lives.

Most men deal with societal pressure to act masculine. Patriarchy tells them to hide their emotions, be manly and be in control. Men are fed that idea from such an early age that even they can’t change it willingly.

And when a healthy partner enters their life and exposes their vulnerable and emotional side, it makes them uncomfortable. They get too scared to handle the emotional stuff and that’s why they pull away.

Again, some men pull away from deep connections because their ‘stud’ image is threatened. They celebrate the narcissistic personality traits of men and thus pull away when they feel they are losing control.

Either way, it prevents them from having healthy relationships, and takes a lot of time (rather, a lot of girls) to realize that they need to change.

But if you have more doubts, head right in…


FAQs about why men pull away

When a man pulls away it genuinely triggers all the insecurities that exist in the world. It’s normal to have many questions based on your unique situation, so let’s hunt for some answers…

1. Why do men pull away when they like you?

Most men pull away when they like you because they fear getting hurt. Pulling away works as a defense mechanism for them. And they think they’re protecting themselves from heartbreaks. If only that was true!

Most times, it’s not their fault. Probably, they encountered similar situations in their past, and going in too strong has really hurt them. So, now they try to avoid repeating past mistakes.

Some men also pull away when they like you because they don’t want to scare you away.

Relationships are very delicate, one person may be very committed to you while the other might only want something casual.

So, men pull a casual act to make you stay interested in them. This act isn’t really for the wrong intentions, however, it doesn’t always bring the desired results.

So, just speak up, be flirty and tell your potential love interest that you like them.

2. Why do men come on strong and then pull away?

So, he was the one interested in you first and now you are chasing him?
Sounds like he is pulling away.

Men are notorious and their emotionally impulsive behavior makes a woman feel not good enough.

Probably, he pulled away because his emotions are too strong to handle.

It might also be that he is guilty of his past relationship. Maybe he made some kind of mistake and he doesn’t want to repeat that with you.

Another ugly and honest truth about this is he lost interest in you. Some men love the intensity of the honeymoon stage. When that settles in, they fear the commitment and blame it on the lost spark.

3. Why do men pull away in early stages?

Most guys pull away in the early stages because they get intimidated by a woman’s attractiveness and high sense of emotional maturity. They don’t want to seem desperate or too strong. So, they play the distant act to keep things interesting.

Understand that sometimes it’s not their fault. It might have happened that they were the “nice guy” before who texted all the time, cared about their partners and made plans for the future. But then they got played. So, they create a wall to not feel that kind of hurt again.

Men also pull away because they don’t want to get emotionally attached too soon. Maybe they fear commitment or have some other goals to pursue.

4. Why men pull away after getting close?

A man pulls away after getting close because he craves more independence and space. This often happens when the relationship becomes demanding in the later stages of a relationship and partners have high expectations from each other.

The relationship doesn’t feel passionate anymore and the fire is fizzing off.  
Due to attraction, the relationship might seem passionate and romantic at first but since there is no exchange of morals, values, and ideas, this becomes uncomfortable after some time.

This makes him feel like he’s settling and might have no options out of this relationship.

He might adopt narcissistic personality traits where he points out things you must change about yourself or blame the lost relationship spark on you.

5. Why men pull away and then come back?

To be honest, this is one of the worst things guys do. When they suddenly pull away, it leaves a bad impact on the girls’ heart but to cope with it, she begins her healing journey.

When they return without the intention of staying, it interrupts the healing process, refills her hopes and breaks it yet again – this time the hurt is worse than before.

This happens primarily because most men are afraid of commitment. They want freedom and space… and also wish to enjoy all the perks of being in a relationship.

It is also possible that they still have feelings for you and want to work on this relationship but don’t know how to.

That is making them all ‘hot-n-cold’ towards you.

6. How long do guys pull away for?

A guy who genuinely likes you and is troubled because of his past relationships will pull away for a few days to only a few weeks.

After that, he realizes nothing is better without you. So, he returns promising to be better and prove it.

But if he pulls away for more than a week, it means he is already seeing someone else. Maybe it’s not exclusive yet, but he isn’t as serious about this situationship as you.

If he pulls away for very long, don’t pursue the relationship because they aren’t seeking anything long-term with you.

7. Will a man come back after pulling away?

This answer usually varies from one man to another. It also depends on why the guy pulled away in the first place.

If he was never interested in more than sex or a casual relationship, consider it the end. But if he really likes you then he will come back when he finally comes face-to-face with the gap that you leave behind.

But sometimes, it also happens that he might come back but he isn’t emotionally mature yet. He has returned to get a dose of the relationship high he experienced.

When he gets it, he will pull back once again. This toxic cycle will keep going on because the root problems aren’t solved. In the end, you will end up heartbroken. So, be mindful if you want to allow this in your life or not.

8. When he pulls away, should I do the same?

Well, it really depends.

If you love that person and it’s visible that he tries hard to be mature enough for you, don’t pull away.

Give him time and space. Trust and help him to figure out solutions to his problems. He might only need some help to fight his demons.

However, if his actions hurt you and he causes more pain than happiness and leaves you feeling worthless… pull away from him because there’s no point waiting for a man who isn’t ready to work on himself.

Always know your worth and find a man who treats you the way you deserve.

A word from ThePleasantRelationship

Relationships are delicate… if both partners are not ready to work together, it will end sooner than you think.

A man pulling away doesn’t have to do anything with a woman. But still, as partners, you must help him but only if he is willing to help himself.

If he isn’t… Why are you wasting your time at all?

It may be difficult but this is a lesson for you to find yourself again and someone who matches your emotional maturity because that is what a healthy relationship is all about.