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25 Unbeatable Bold Tips For Dating A Shy Guy 

25 Unbeatable Bold Tips For Dating A Shy Guy 

Updated on Sep 26, 2023

25 Unbeatable Bold Tips For Dating A Shy Guy 

Are you looking for tips for dating a shy guy? Perhaps you can’t bond well because of his shyness.

Well, for starters, you must build effective communication with him. This will allow you to grow closer and understand him and his emotions.

But that’s not the only way, so let’s get started here!


25 Tips For Dating A Shy Guy

You fell head over heels for this cute, shy guy. But he never makes a move, so you feel undesired. Dating him seems so daunting that you often blame yourself for not understanding him.

If that’s your case, amp up your dating experience with him with these quick and simple tips!

1. Be observant of his interests

Take an interest in his choices. Observe the games he likes to play or the food he likes. 

Later, you can initiate a conversation on this topic, giving him a safe space to open up. He will be more active in the conversation and will want to talk with you.

2. Don’t expect him to become outgoing

Remember, he is shy, so don’t expect him to be extremely open anytime soon. After all, shyness is a part of his personality. 

He might show minute changes after some time. But it will always be a partial shift from his current personality.  You must go slow while dating shy guys as they take time to build relationships.

3. Use common points of interest

If you have common interests, like music or comedy shows, then spend time doing that more often. This will help him connect with you better. 

When you do things together that interest you both, it will allow him to move past that initial phase of extreme shyness.

4. Take time to understand him

If you are more open than your partner, it can be difficult for you to adjust to the situation.  Give yourself some time. It will allow you to understand him. 

Especially try to know what kind of guy he is and what makes him feel more shy. You’ll know how to act accordingly to avoid triggering his shyness.

5. Don’t dictate his feelings

A common mistake you must avoid when dating a shy guy is that you cannot ask him how he should feel. 

Shy guys are usually introverts, so they have a problem opening up. This does not mean that they feel any less. 

If you dictate how he should feel to him, it’ll make him more skeptical and escape the relationship.

6. Ask him open-ended questions

Whenever you ask him anything, use open-ended questions. This gives him much space to answer the question, and he won’t have to overthink. 

He won’t feel pressured to answer a certain way to please you. Thus, it’ll let the relationship blossom.

7. Respect his feelings

It takes a lot of courage and effort for a shy guy to open up and share secrets. Hence, if he has shared anything with you, respect that and don’t tell anyone about it. Otherwise, it will break their trust forever.

8. Give a shot at texting

While dating a shy guy, your ultimate best friend is none other than texting. Most shy guys prefer to share their feelings in texts but can’t communicate one-on-one. 

You may even see a different version of this shy man and be surprised that he has become an amazing texter.

9. Make physical moves but don’t rush him

A shy guy is not only shy when communicating; he’s equally shy regarding physical moves. Hence, it will take him a lot of time to make the first move and come close to you. So, to get intimate, you must make the first move!

10. Learn his body language

A golden tip to date a shy guy is understanding his body language. Notice how he expresses excitement, joy, disappointment, and other emotions with his body language. 

Once you learn it, you will know how to respond appropriately and make him comfortable.

11. Be the speaker if he loves listening

A shy guy may want to be someone other than the speaker in the relationship. He might prefer to follow your lead instead. 

Hence, the best thing to do is to let him be the listener. He will also appreciate this, as it’ll help him organize his thoughts. 

12. Connect with his close friends

Dating a shy guy does not mean that he does not have any friends at all. He probably has a small yet extremely close group of friends. 

They will know everything about him that might be helpful for you. So, try to connect with his friends and understand how he is.

13. Know about his love language

Different people have different languages of love. Some show it with acts of service, and some do it with gifts. There are more ways, so you must study all those and figure out his love language.

Once you know his love language, you’ll know exactly what he does out of love. It will bring you both closer!

14. Consider the root of this issue

Sometimes, being shy is a defensive response, which can come from unresolved traumas from childhood or adolescence. 

Try to understand where this shyness is coming from. Identify if there are more deep-rooted issues like a lack of self-confidence or body image issues.

15. Don’t take all situations personally

A shy guy is quiet and will often not tell you what you want to hear. This is not because he doesn’t like you. So, don’t take it personally and give up hope. Remember, it’s a part of his personality, and he doesn’t want to hurt you knowingly.

16. Acknowledge his wit

Shy men may speak less, but they always give proof of their wits with actions. So, always acknowledge his wit. It will let him know you notice the small things. Further, this will boost his self-confidence and allow him to overcome his shyness.

17. Be prepared for calm and cozy dates

Since he’s shy, he can’t make big gestures or flashy acts of romance for date nights. Instead of a fancy restaurant, he’ll take you on a date night at home with takeout. Don’t be disappointed if he often chooses at-home dates

18. Don’t make fun of him

A very big thing that you should never do is make fun of his shyness. In most cases, a shy guy is already fighting with his withdrawn nature, and he thinks it to be a curse. 

If you start making fun of his shyness in front of others, it will create a lot of self-doubt.

19. Don’t fight over his shyness

Being shy is a personal attribute and is never a setback. So, don’t make it the cause of a fight or make a big scene. Otherwise, it will make him feel guilty and unaccomplished.

20. Use the 10-Second rule 

Discuss the ten-second rule, which is extremely effective. Tell him it takes ten seconds to ask you out, share how it feels, or take up the first move. 

This will calm him down to a great extent and allow him to gather the courage to make a move.

21. Introduce him to new people

Sometimes, the guy is shy because he has never met or talked to new people. So, he has become self-conscious and fears judgments. 

Create that opportunity by introducing him to new people like your friends and family. This might help him overcome his shyness.

22. Allow him space

Shy and introverted men often get exhausted and need time to recharge. So, don’t always force him to spend time with you. Let him take some time away once in a while. Don’t be bitter about it, and your relationship will grow stronger.

23. Change your way of expressing

You don’t always have to express your love verbally. Sitting together, holding hands, or cuddling can deepen the relationship. He’ll feel comfortable and open up easily.

24. Don’t force him if he turns you down

Since he’s shy, he won’t be as firm about things he dislikes. People usually impose more on him because of this. Make sure you don’t force him to do anything he dislikes. Otherwise, he’ll dread spending time with you.

25. Never cancel plans

And finally, make the right decision to cancel plans. It takes a lot of effort for a shy guy to agree with you and go for plans. 

If you cancel the plans, he’ll become more reserved and might reinforce his shy behavior.


A word from ThePleasantRelationship

Getting closer to a shy guy can be challenging. But if you follow the above tips, you will eventually make things work.

Remember to be extremely patient and understand he’s different. Be proud of your partner, and don’t criticize him unnecessarily. 

Once in a while, let them know you still love them and give them ample time. Eventually, he’ll start expressing his feelings, and you’ll hit things off!

Are you interested to know more about ‘Tips For Dating A Shy Guy’ then click here?

Are you interested to know more about ‘How to Tell Someone You Don’t Want to Date Them’ then click here?