So, you’re wondering how to get over a crush at work. While staying back late and working together, you started catching feelings for them.
Your heart makes backflips when you see them. But your mind says an office crush/romance will only complicate your job.
If you’re in a similar predicament, keep reading to put an end to these feelings…
How to Get Over a Crush at Work? 20 Tips
If you have a crush on someone at work, it can be so hard to get over them. After all, you spend long hours at work. You see them going about their day looking attractive and capable and making your heart pound.
But not anymore. So, follow these well-rounded tips to move on and stay professional!
1. Understand the downsides of office romances
Check your company policy for strict rules against office romance. If there’s any, it’s not worth acting on your feelings! There may also be legal risks of getting involved in one. This must motivate you enough to give up on your coworker.
Remember your priorities – you worked hard to reach this position. You can’t afford to lose it all and start over elsewhere.
If there’s no such rule, people will gossip about you. If you have a crush on your boss, they’ll say you slept to gain recognition. If it’s a subordinate, they’ll say the same about them. If you’re both in similar positions, people will think you guys don’t work and only flirt.
2. Think what might happen if things don’t work out
Suppose you confess to your crush and get rejected. You’ll be the gossip material of the entire office and things will turn too awkward to focus on your work. people
On the other hand, if you guys hit it off for now but break up later, that’ll also be equally awkward. You’ll also feel emotionally charged when you meet your ex every day. This will slow down the healing process.
3. Identify and assess their negative traits
At work, everyone’s trying to put their best foot forward. So, it’s normal to admire this person and mistake those for romantic feelings.
To snap out of it, you have to focus on their flaws. Try to know their personality beneath the professional mask. You may find something really disturbing and disgusting and know they aren’t a good match at all.
4. Avoid connecting beyond work
Limit contact with your office crush other than work. Make sure all conversations end beyond work hours. Don’t share any details about your personal life and vice versa.
Otherwise, you might find similarities and feel more connected with them. It’ll only make it worse to get over them!
5. Skip the after-work parties for a while
Avoid the after-work events until your emotions fizzle out. Otherwise, the more you spend time in casual settings, the more they seem charming to you. You will make more memories with them and have trouble overcoming these feelings.
Besides, if you get drunk, you might make regrettable mistakes like kissing them, confessing, or sleeping with them.
6. Don’t stalk their social media
When you have a crush, you want to know everything about them. Do they have a partner? Is their relationship bad? How are they in their personal life?
You also get to see so many of their attractive pictures!
But you may fall harder and feed your expectations more this way. So, stop stalking to push them out of your mind.
7. Seek the help of loved ones
Talk to someone you feel safe with about this crush. Tell them you want to get over your feelings. They may help point out your crush’s flaws or even suggest ways to overcome your feelings.
8. Make friends and socialize beyond work
Don’t shut yourself in just because you feel miserable about your feelings. Step out, meet new friends, find people with similar interests, join a club with them, and build a strong social network.
It’ll help you feel less lonely and distract you from your feelings. You might even find someone better for yourself!
9. Let go of the feelings with art
If you’re an introvert and socializing isn’t your forte, then take a chance with art. Pen down a story, compose music, or paint. Embrace art, a form of expression and therapy, to let go of your emotions!
10. Don’t stare at them
If you have a bad crush, you might not even know when you start staring at them. This staring might lead to eye contact, flirting, and a speedy escalation of feelings.
It also makes you daydream and think a lot about them and intensifies feelings. So, be mindful of your actions and remind yourself not to stare.
11. Avoid beating yourself up
Nobody can control their emotions. So don’t judge yourself for growing feelings for the wrong person. Acknowledge that attraction is normal at work and you didn’t do it intentionally.
So, be kind to yourself and shut down your inner critic. While you work on getting over your crush, motivate and cheer yourself for working hard!
12. Never compromise with professionalism
Remind yourself that you can’t act unprofessional to protect your reputation, save your job, and get over them. So follow the below rules when interacting with your crush:
- Don’t make eye contact.
- Avoid physical contact.
- No double-meaning jokes.
- Never try to sneak away with them.
- Don’t compliment them on anything beyond work.
13. Don’t share about it on social media
You find a relatable post on social media about office romance. You share it on your wall. If anyone from work notices it, they’ll gossip about your romantic life. They might even spread rumors about you in the company.
It’ll be hard to push your crush’s thoughts out of your mind. Plus, your reputation might eat dust!
14. Put yourself out on a dating pool
Another tip to kick these feelings out of your heart is to join dating apps. Know that there are plenty of fish in the sea. In fact, you will find people with better looks, backgrounds, and charisma there.
So create a compelling dating profile and start swiping to find the right partner!
15. Understand the traits you like
Set aside time for yourself and think about what you like in your office crush. Is it their looks, style, communication skills, personality, ambition, or something more?
Jot down all the qualities you feel attracted to. Then check for those traits in your dates to create an instant connection. Moreover, once you know that there are more people with such traits, your crush won’t seem that special!
16. Journal your feelings
Probably, your mind is overflowing with thoughts and feelings about your crush. Especially if it leads to sleepless nights, pen your feelings down in a journal. It will calm your noisy mind and put an end to these fantasies.
17. Push them out of the mental picture
When you have a crush, it’s normal to wonder, “What if we didn’t work at the same place?” or even “What if we had kids… what would we name them?”
Get rid of these outrageous and unhealthy fantasies ASAP. You need to fill your mind with better distractions. You can pick up a new hobby or think about spending time with friends and family.
18. Redirect your energy to work
Your work brings food to your table, so remind yourself of its importance and redirect all energy, enthusiasm, and focus on it.
Set goals about your daily work and meet those. Outdo your professional expectations of yourself. Dream of a promotion or salary raise and work your way up. This will help you get rid of the obsession.
19. Don’t hurry the process
The process of getting over feelings is never quick. So, don’t be disappointed if it takes time. Allow yourself to feel your feelings, reflect on them, and slowly move on.
20. Promise yourself to find someone nice
During this journey, you might feel that you’re not worth love. You might think the heavens are punishing you for something by making you fall for a coworker.
Remind yourself that you will eventually find a better person to date and settle down with. Remember that there’s someone better waiting out there for you.
A word from ThePleasantRelationship
With these tips in mind, you’ll eventually outgrow your feelings. But remember, feelings don’t disappear overnight. So, have faith that with time, everything will work out.
Lastly, remember that you have complete control over your actions – if not your emotions. So, take charge of the situation, and you’ll move on!
Surabhi wakes up every day with a drive to craft words that can create a soulful impact. Creatively adventurous, she is always seeking to learn new skills and acquire new experiences. With a hidden soft corner for languages (especially Urdu), she writes poetry occasionally, binges on romantic shows, and LOVES to talk. A hustler, admirer, chaser, Surabhi is just another-someone who refused to give up on her dreams. She says, she is just somebody who’s trying to make herself a writer and for now, she’s just writing...