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Everything You Need to Know to Have a Successful One Night Stand

Everything You Need to Know to Have a Successful One Night Stand

Updated on Jan 15, 2024

Reviewed by Julianne Cantarella, MSW, LSW , Certified Relationship Coach

One Night Stand - Definition, Reasons, Pros and Cons, Tips & More

Curious how a one-night stand works? Want sexual fun without any attachment? And also, don’t wanna see your sexual encounter ever again?

Great! You reached the perfect place because this think-piece is your one-stop solution. Plus, congratulations on finding your heart’s true desires.

Guess you’re a free soul who doesn’t give two cents to society’s stupid cage… and guess what? I find that really sexy!

People who know themselves, are honest, don’t lead others on… we need more of you out here. This world is full of jerks who selfishly play with hearts and have pride in it. They honestly disgust me…

But you really lifted my mood… so allow me to give you a special tour here…

One night stand meaning

Summary
A one-time consensual and casual sex between two sexual partners is a one-night stand. Nobody hopes to stay in touch or emotionally bond in the arrangement.

A one-night stand (ONS) is a one-time consensual sexual encounter between two people. The sexual participants have sex and hope to never see or contact one another again.

There’re sexual activities between the two for once, minus the emotional and commitment factor.

It’s a usual thing for ethical non-monogamist who aren’t into emotional attachment.

For monogamous people, a one-night stand is equally detrimental as any other affair.

Further, if you get laid on the first date, there are added downsides. For the record, you don’t know them as a person, so you risk your safety to an almost stranger.

However, many suggest one-night stands to boost sexual confidence, personal development, and satisfaction.

It’s quite easy and safe to search one-night hook-ups on dating apps. Plus, you have the added chance to know your partner well.

Find it appealing? Let’s find some interesting facts here…


10 Things no one tells you about one night stands

One-night stands have both good and bad sides… However, most people look down on them because they’re too short.

People hardly know the interesting parts about ONS… and tell you all the wrong things.

You might change your mind after knowing these truths about ONS…

1. The moment is too thrilling

In ONS, it’s your first and last time to explore a new body. You check what turns them on in every possible way.

Also, you ditch most of the conceptions about sex. You have one chance, and try everything to heat them up.

It’s also thrilling because your touches make a random person squirm beneath you… which seems quite hot.

2. The thrill is laced with fear

Though thrilling, there’re tons of weird possibilities… the other person might not have similar tastes, they might not like your moves or be a complete psychopath.

Sex on the first date can be quite scary regardless of gender. It’s a complete surprise… and you’re in it knowing nothing at all.

3. Like cuddling? Hop in!

Who doesn’t, but do you like to cuddle? Not everyone craves a bit of skin contact, but ask them if you’re. They might be all up for it, but don’t force them into it.

An ONS doesn’t mean you need to chase the action like a mad dog. Since you’ll never see them again, what stopped you from cuddling? To feel fulfilled, make the best out of every ONS.

4. It’s different but genuine

Many say that an ONS isn’t equal to a long-term relationship. It isn’t real or fulfilling because of the lack of intimacy.

But where’s the point? You decide whether you want a temporary fling or not. 

If you feel fulfilled from the sexual connection alone, don’t listen to such thoughts. Be honest with your needs and ignore others’ thoughts. You only got one life, write your story yourself.

5. The passion is on fire

Sex between two people who don’t know one another… and possibly never see each other… is liberating! There’s no judgment, and even if there is, you won’t stay long to hear them.

You have fun at the moment… feel desirable to a stranger. It feels empowering and boosts your confidence.

In turn, you become sexually hotter… and do things you’ll never do with a serious partner.

The boost brings out the beast from within.

6. They might disappoint you

Though your performance might reach a peak, can’t say the same about your ONS partner. Since you don’t know how they’re in bed, more surprises are on your way!

You don’t have any way to know how good they are until you begin. Well, how they kiss and make out might give you some pointers.

7. There’s no time to fall

As soon as you get the room, you get frisky with your ONS.

There’s no sweet-talking about their looks… not time to waste at all. You kiss, make out, do your thing… there’s hardly any time to know them as a person.

How will you fall if there’s no room for intimacy? You satisfy yourself and leave without expectations.

8. But you might fall in love

However, the cuddling factor might get you a chance to develop feelings. Cuddling after sex helps to secrete feel-good hormones.

They make you feel good about your ONS’s presence beside you.

People sometimes pillow-talk during cuddling sesh… which is the cherry for emotional bonding. You’re human and such actions might pull your heartstrings in unknown ways.

9. It might be unforgettable

Your sexual compatibility or the emotional connection might be a bomb. Though you know the ONS rules, you’ll probably never forget them.

You might miss them or experience hard and secretly wish for it again.

It lingers on your mind forever… it feels like a faraway dream you can’t ever reach, and live with it.

10. You might get married

Or, you see them again and again… until you both fall hard in love. Many successful relationships begin with an ONS. It was the fate of those couples… they had to meet one another uniquely.

However, don’t hope that your hot ONS will like you back. Usually, such expectations bite you back later.

But is an ONS that easy? Let’s know from…


Dos and Don’ts for one night stands

Like every other relationship or arrangement, one-night stands have quite a few rules. Though it can be a pain, it’s for your own welfare.

So, before you begin an ONS, you gotta brush up on some ground rules.

Let’s first begin with the

Dos…

1. Come clean about your intentions

Before you pull your date to the bed, never skip the communication. Tell them that you’re looking for a one-time fling, that you’ll probably never meet… and even if you do, you’ll never date them.

Let them grasp the situation well. Don’t pressure them into it. The arrangement is on if they give consent. No point keeping them in the dark for a moment’s fun.

2. Respect them

Respect your ONS, they deserve it! Agreeing to your one-time thing doesn’t allow you to disrespect them. It doesn’t mean that they’re immoral… you both are in the same boat so no judging.

And as long as it’s consensual, nothing’s immoral in it. Respect them like any other date.

3. Respect the boundaries

While you’re still out on the date, discuss your boundaries. If your boundaries clash, negotiate for the best of you both.

Ultimately, stick to your boundaries, no pushing. You can’t have good sex if either of you feels uncomfortable, scared, or resentful.

4. Go for it ONLY when you’re not committed

ONS isn’t a great idea if you’re in a relationship, wooing one, or broke up with an ex. While cheating in a monogamous relationship is obviously bad, curious about the other two?

Well, if your potential partner knows about your ONS, you might give them a bad impression. They’ll suspect you’re playing with them.

Imagine how it’ll feel to find your partner in bed with someone… because you both fought. Yup, it’s a bad choice!

5. Look for common interests

Not your daily hobbies, look for someone with the same sexual palate. If you’re into anal, and they aren’t… What’s the point of the arrangement?

You won’t feel satisfied… it’ll rather feel like a wasted attempt. So, always make sure you have similar choices.

6. Experiment the heat

Unlike a serious partner, your ONS won’t judge you for being a freak in bed. A romantic partner might accuse you of loving their body, and not their soul.

But an ONS is about sexual activities only. So, take advantage of the situation and consensually fulfill your darkest desires.

You never know, without the pressure, you might unleash some great skills.

7. Pick the chance to feel better

If your sexual confidence is low because of your ex’s mean comments, take charge. An ONS can pull your confidence back… and show how desirable you are.

Your sexual encounter will prove that you can please others well and you’re still in the game.

8. Hit the sack when you’re sure

Only try an ONS if you’re aware of how things work. If you’re a romantic person or can’t set your feelings apart from sex… then it’ll hurt you. ONS isn’t your thing if you expect to meet them again.

Some people may fall in love with their ONS, but don’t have such thoughts in your mind. Engage in an ONS only when you honestly accept it.

9. Abide by the law

All ONS experiences are unforgettable in some way… but don’t try anything illegal for the thrill. For instance, public sex is banned in the USA, so don’t try it even for the thrill.

Don’t get yourself or your ONS into unnecessary trouble to scratch the itch.

10. Avoid anything risky

Also, don’t do anything that might hurt either of you physically. If anal is your thing, go ahead, but only use proper toys.

Many people visited the emergency rooms with veggies stuck in their bodies.

Why turn a possibly amazing sexual encounter into a horrendous clinical one?

11. Consider the age

ONS is great but only when you’re ready. Firstly, avoid it if you’re underage… take more time to consider how you want sex to be.

Secondly, is your heart prepared to share your body with someone you’ll never see?

If you’re not ready for either, push your plans for later.

12. Expect a great experience

Hope to have great sex, not mind-blowing sex. Your ONS has no idea about your ero zones, so don’t expect them to hit the right spot.

It’ll be messy and a bit awkward. Tell them where it feels good.

This might turn off the heat for a moment, but that’s fine. People are unique so this is compulsory. Don’t hold the bar too high… it’s just sex.

Regardless of what you do, consent is important and sexy. Neither of you is sex toys that you can treat the other, however.

Of course, no need to be serious… stay in the mood and ask whatever you wanna do to them. Also, don’t do anything you don’t want. 

If they do anything without your consent, shove them away.

14. Stick to your morals

Whether cultural or religious beliefs, if you feel any sexual act is immoral, don’t do it. If it’s something you’ll regret later on… it’s not worth the try.

15. Consider their feelings

Your ONS must be someone who isn’t well-acquainted with you. Avoid people like an ex or someone who crushes on you. In the end, sex with them will give them false hopes.

You’ll feel great about getting laid but hurt them emotionally. You might feel guilty for not considering their feelings later.

Such thoughts haunt some forever, so remove such risks.

And now hop into some more crucial Don’ts…

Don’ts

1. Pick a complete stranger

Once again, investigate before you lead someone to the bed. For instance, know if you’re in good hands… don’t be a criminal’s target.

Check their STI reports, don’t skip the condom even if they say they’re on pills. Because there are women who lie about being on contraceptives or have STIs and be unaware.

2. Leave without a heads-up

If you’re staying back, don’t skip the last goodbye. They allowed you to crash over, so the least you can do is show good manners.

Wake up your ONS and tell them you’re leaving.

Also, don’t sneak into their devices to get their contacts

3. Do it to prove anything

Think having sex can make people fall in love? Don’t have an ONS to prove that. ONS satisfies sexual hunger, not emotional ones.

Think you might fall for your ONS? That’s a red flag, don’t do it.

They’ll probably never seek you for sex twice. Also, sex won’t change their thoughts on relationships.

Contrarily, don’t do it to prove that you aren’t clingy. If you fall in love easily… your clingy side will show up every time.

4. Let words fool you

When someone asks you to get frisky on the first date, and you’re not into ONS… don’t give in. Immoral people try to get in others’ pants without spilling their intentions.

They’ll talk sweetly, praise you, and make you believe they’re deeply in love… but don’t give into first-date sex.

5. Expect loneliness to vanish

If you’re feeling lonely or insecure, don’t resort to ONS. An ONS won’t fulfill such deep needs. You’ll get a night’s worth of skin contact, but that won’t feed your emotional hunger.

Further, you’ll only have a dissatisfying sexual encounter. So, seek loved ones or join a new activity to deal with loneliness.

6. Believe you aren’t worth long-terms

Never resort to ONS with pessimistic feelings like “I’m not worth long-term relationships, nobody will love me”. It’ll only feed your depressive thoughts because all ONS’s will leave you.

You deserve a loving relationship… so, wait for the right person to love and be loved. An ONS might hurt you further… you’re still worthy if you don’t try it.

7. Test your desirability

Once again, ONS is about sexual pleasure… so don’t keep ulterior motives for it. If you try ONS to know how good you’re in bed… ask them directly.

However, don’t hope that your ONS will beg you for more. Such hopes imply that you seek approval and validation of your desirability.

Focus on pleasure, instead of treating it like a game.

8. Feed your addiction

A person in deep depression, who feels unlovable and worthless, might be addicted to ONS. They’re ready to compromise for overnight pleasure and attention to make up for their needs.

If this rings a bell, seek a mental health professional.

9. Expect it to help forget an ex

An ONS is a great experience, uplifts your mood, and even helps you regain lost sexual confidence. However, it’s not a replacement for your ex.

You spent quite a long time with your ex… a single night’s experience can’t compensate for your memories in your committed relationship.

10. Do it when you’re high

Whether you’re on drugs or blackout drunk, don’t engage in ONS. You might skip safe sex practices, hurt yourself or them, or do something illegal.

Anything can happen when you’re drunk so avoid it.

Wanna try ONS? Great, but let’s first take a look at…


Reasons why people have a one night stand

Wondering if you must engage in ONS? Well, that’s completely up to you. However, there are some basic reasons for everyone. 

Check below if your reasons match with the common ones or you’re unique…

1. To build connection (minus emotions)

People with traumatic pasts and attachment style issues don’t believe in romance. They’re aware long-term relationships need commitment.

So, ONS is the best way to avoid hurting anyone else… or to avoid the pain of turning down one person’s romantic advances multiple times.

2. To test desirability

Though usually it doesn’t work out… Some people want to test out their desirability factor. They wanna know if the other person will seek them out.

They stick their confidence to the other person’s actions… and usually feel dejected because they never ever get in touch.

3. To unleash the beast

There’re things you wanna explore… might be a different sex position, a toy, or anything that turns you on most.

Usually, people prefer ONS for the beastly actions because they won’t judge you… after all, you’ll never see them again.

You can show your true self to a stranger without overthinking.

4. To distract yourself

Perhaps some part of your life is in a mess… and you want solace for one night. To forget everything wrong in your life, find peace, and be happy, you reach out for someone’s embrace for a day.

It’s a distraction from the hard truth… and it might help you get some much-needed energy.

5. To enjoy the worldly pleasure

The world is full of lively pleasures you haven’t seen yet. And life is too short to feel all of them. Sex feels wonderful, but if you hardly have time for a relationship… this is it.

Sometimes people only wanna enjoy the superficial connection and live a carefree life.

6. To regain confidence

If someone told you’re too – pale, dark, skinny, fat, or whatever – so your body doesn’t turn them on… you’re a wounded soul.

A one-night stand reminds you that you’re sexy as you are. You don’t need anyone’s opinion for it. After an ONS, people return to the dating apps with full confidence.

7. To avoid deeper issues

People with compulsive avoidance make excuses to avoid real-life issues. They’ll do anything to hide deep concerns behind their actions.

For instance, a person is emotionally unavailable because of their traumatic childhood.

However, instead of seeking therapy, they’ll depend on one-night stands… and give excuses to not form an emotional attachment.

8. To break the dry spell

Perhaps you didn’t have sex for a long time… you were too focused on other aspects of life and ignored your desires.

Also, you might feel undesirable or embarrassed to even discuss it with friends.

People without a constant partner usually break the dry spell with a one-night stand.

9. To avoid the pain of FWB

You want a no-strings-attached arrangement… you’re dead-set on it. Perhaps you tried friends with benefits (FWB) arrangement… and found how messy things become.

To avoid the emotional involvement and expectations, you found ONS as a better alternative to FWB.

10. To forget an ex

Whether it’s a bad breakup or a mutual divorce… a separation inflicts emotional wounds. It leaves you questioning your worth.

If you’re worthy of love or will you be lonely forever… because your ex didn’t have the best impression about you.

People engage in overnight casual flings to forget their past relationships… but it never works.

Wondering if all is good with ONS? Know from here…


Pros and Cons of One night stand

Like any other casual arrangement, there are some pros and cons of ONS. After all, you both are unique and sex is the only common factor. So first let’s dig into the…

Pros

1. Zero emotions haunt you

If you’re too busy for serious relationships, or emotional attachment isn’t your thing, this is the best deal. You focus on the fun, say your goodbyes, and never see them again.

It removes any chance of your ONS falling for you… and troubling your life.

2. You can be straightforward

With a serious partner, you gotta keep in mind what you ask, can’t freak them out… else, they’ll run for the hills.

Also, your desires might make them awkward… because they don’t know or don’t wanna know.

However, it’s all about sex with an ONS… nothing stops you from asking what you want. In the end,  that’s what you both want.

3. Might have the best sex

There’s always the chance of having the best sex of your life in a one night stand. You can really be true to yourself… which you can’t in relationships.

Also, there’s a thrill of doing it with some stranger-like person. The adrenaline pump makes it all the better.

4. You feel desired and liberated

Whether you had a bad relationship, or just don’t feel attractive… a one-night stand helps you feel the freedom of ending a toxic connection… or help you feel like a sex God everyone desires.

5. There’s no pressure of expectations

In relationships, your partner expects you to be a certain model of sex God… not that you aren’t… but your and your partner’s definition of a God or beast in bed might be different.

In ONS, no expectations haunt you. In fact, you’re free to perform without any mental pressure.

And then comes the…

Cons

1. It might destroy your self-worth

If you believe in romanticism, everlasting love, or that only between two people in love must have sex… then a one-night stand can consume your self-worth.

You might hate yourself for receiving such a form of intimacy. People, who don’t believe in ONS, also feel nobody can love them for their actions.

2. You might feel guilty

Do your values, ethics, culture, or religion preaches to practice sex only after marriage? Then a moment of fleeting emotions might leave you with a lifetime’s guilt.

You might feel bad for betraying your values and giving in to carnal desires. The experience, though one-time, leaves behind a lifetime’s worth of shame.

3. You might get STD’s

In one-night stands, there are high chances of getting STDs… more so if it’s a complete stranger. Before engaging in sexual relationships, you must discuss safe sex practices.

Sexual desires may sometimes overpower you, fog your mind and forget condoms at home.

4. They don’t know your turn-ons

This person you know for a few hours hardly knows any of your turn-ons. They don’t know where it feels the best. You guide them throughout the sesh to work it out.

Though, it puts a damper on the entire experience.

5. You might fall for them

The ultimate con is catching feelings… you don’t want it but it still happens. Possibly you fall for their face, body, or how they perform in bed. Or it’s because of their relatable childhood stories.

Whichever it is, your eyes will always seek them in a crowd… but there’s no chance of seeing them ever, let alone a romantic connection.

So, you’ve made up your mind to embark on an ONS? Let me help you do that… starting with women.


How to have a successful one-night stand for women?

Though the world speaks ill of straightforward women, I love cheering you on. When a woman knows what she wants, she becomes irresistibly hot!

However, we gotta step forward carefully… and here’s how you do it…

1. Mind the attraction factor and creep radar

You’ll definitely fall for the hottest one, that’s fine… but if your instincts say they’re bad news, don’t ignore that. Pay attention to their sex appeal and your feelings towards this person.

Indulge in small-talk to peek inside their character. Choose someone you know but possibly not ever see again.

For instance, your friend’s co-worker is a better choice than your co-worker.

2. Pave the way with optimism

Break the ice with confidence and positivity. If you’re in a club, maintain eye contact with them, smile, and look away. Approach them with a relaxed look, hope your voice doesn’t crack.

Laugh a bit to cover up the awkwardness. Get in their personal space to test the water. If they return the gesture, begin flirting.

3. Give heads up to friends

Always stay connected to a friend. Whether you hit on that person, go bar-hopping with them, or head straight to business, update a friend for much-needed safety.

Send them their name, the meeting location, your destination, and ask them to call you in the morning.

4. Say yes to protection

Some men just want to go raw for no reason, so carry both male and female condoms.

If they insist on ditching protection, use your own. You can compromise with the dry spell, but not an STI.

Also, choose birth control – pills or IUD – because condoms aren’t always 100% effective.

5. Say no to substances

Intoxication and casual sex are the worst combos.

People don’t usually make good choices when they’re high, so you risk your safety. Also, the hangover the next morning might strip off the charm of your experience.

Either avoid substances when you plan to hit it off or postpone the plans if you’re high.

6. Choose a safe place

Never agree to go to their place… you’re still not sure if they aren’t a creep.

Bring them over if you wanna avoid the walk of shame next morning. You’ll be in a safe place and comfortably enjoy it.

However, if showing your place is risky or you live with family, choose a hotel near your place.

7. Talk before the dirty talk

Before you lead them to the bed, tell them it’s a one-time fling, what you like in bed, what you wanna try today. Also, tell them if you’re uncomfortable with any sexual activity.

Urge them to share what they like to create a magical experience. If you’ll do anything risky, settle on safe words.

And when the action begins, guide them on how to please you… it’ll heighten your sensations.

8. Lower your expectations

If you expect them to love you back, it’s time to back off. Seriously, this is a hook-up, not a scene cut from romance movies.

Accept that they’ll never look for you again. Heck, they’ll hook up with another woman the next night.

9. Snuggle up

Love or no love, you can always snuggle up and feel the warmth of physical intimacy. If you’re not into commitment, ONS might be your only chance to snuggle.

Ask them if they’re comfy and bundle up in some post-coital joy.

10. Split respectfully

Whether you’re in your place or at a hotel, shrink up their morning stay. Make an excuse like “I’ve some prior plans” and leave as fast as you can. Don’t treat them like trash.

Though, if they paid for the room, politely get yourself out with some excuse.

Wait, we’ve something for men out there as well.


How to have a successful one night stand for men?

A woman out of a crowd approaches you… boosts your ego, doesn’t it? However, are you sure they’ll not miss you?

There are too many competitions, so you gotta stand out… interested? Here’s how…

1. Clean your abode

Clean up your place before leaving. If you bring them home, imagine their horror/disgust.

No woman/man wanna hit the sack in an unhygienic place. It’s a huge turn-off for most.

Either clean or lose your mating call for the night.

2. Put in more efforts 

When you find the hottie for your ONS, contain your excitement. Be a gentleman, don’t hover over them. Show them a good time, talk about interesting stuff, and humor them.

Attract them with patient charms, or else they’ll lose interest. Also, a rushing man gives off creepy vibes.

3. Don’t intoxicate yourself

If you’re already chatting, skip any intoxicating substances. Alcohol can delay erection, so save yourself some face.

Further, if you’re not in your right mind, you might forget protection and get STDs and STIs. You don’t wanna throw up or faint from too much alcohol either.

4. Spill the intentions

Before you take them to your room, tell them that you’ll probably never meet again… at least not willingly. Be very straightforward about what you want.

5. Protection is a necessity!

If you go out with the thought, “Imma get laid” then you better get protection. It saves you from STIs and STDs, it prevents unwanted pregnancy.

Unless you wanna pay for child support too badly, cover up your tool!

6. Balance the kink

Of course, the highlight of ONS is sex so tell them about all of your fetishes and what arouses you. Find out their comfort zone and negotiate. Take consent beforehand, choose a safe word.

However, don’t include sharp objects or small animals in your kink.

7. Never show unnecessary emotions

Never sympathize with your ONS partner… they know it’s fake but it kinda gives them hope… and gets you in trouble. Be true to your promise… keep it a sex-only situation.

If you entangle your emotions, they’ll track you for a while.

8. Don’t be a jerk

There are jerks out there who share one-night stand’s nudes, contacts, or even addresses with their friends. Whether you had fun or not, you don’t have such rights.

She might not even know what you did, but remember, you’ve a human conscience that knows it all.

9. Just stay over

If you stayed over at theirs, stay the night back when you’re tired after satisfying rounds. Don’t abandon a woman the moment you’re done… it eats away at their self-esteem.

Also, why risk getting home at 3 in the morning? You’ll risk your life if you drive drowsily. Unless your partner asks you to leave directly, take permission and sleepover.

If they’re yours, offer them a pillow.

10. Don’t outstay your welcome

If you crashed at theirs, bid goodbye, and leave ASAP in the morning. The next morning is too awkward after a one-night stand, so do them a favor. Also, leave on a good note if you had fun.

Tell them if you had fun, or if you hope to see them again. Don’t give them hope if you don’t mean it.

But what if it brings shocking news? Let’s know…


How to announce pregnancy to a one night stand?

Are you nauseous in the morning? Or, hate your favorite food? Did you miss your period? Yikes… but hey, we’ll work it out! Trust me, it’ll get better… take a deep breath and go through this…

1. Verify the truth

If you’re getting early symptoms of pregnancy, don’t panic and wait until you miss your period. Don’t share the word until you’re sure.

Take a pregnancy test after missing the period. To confirm better, get a blood test or urine test done.

2. Gather your feelings

After confirmation, your feelings might scatter all over the place. This isn’t the right time to confront the baby’s father. Take time to settle how you feel about it.

You’re definitely shocked, so seek a trusted friend that won’t spread gossip. Wait until you calm your emotions to think about the next step.

3. Ponder on the possibilities

Depending on your feelings, you can proceed with several steps. If you don’t want the baby, consider abortion or putting them up for adoption.

If you want it, ask the baby’s father to co-parent, or be a single mom. Think which can work better… but don’t take any actions yet.

4. Prepare the dialogue

Whatever you choose, consider talking to the baby’s father. But before that, know what to say. Choose your communication route well. You need an all-inclusive short dialogue like

“I’m pregnant… I know it’s yours. I know/don’t know what to do… but/so I reached out for your thoughts. I think you must know about it.”

Depending on your decision, choose your convenient conversation mode and practice. Try saying it out aloud with confidence.

5. Make an appointment

If you have their contact, call them and set up your meeting location. Tell them you have something important to discuss. They’ll probably behave coldly, so don’t mind that.

If they refuse, break the work over call.

6. Don’t beat around the bush

Be very straightforward, don’t waste their time with unnecessary small-talk. He probably doesn’t even want to listen and will give you a silent treatment.

Don’t cower at their reaction, state your mind and wait.

7. Don’t have high hopes

Nobody wants to become a father out of the blue. Similar to you, he’ll also feel confused and overwhelmed.

He might deny responsibility, or ask for time. For the latter, fix on a date instead of being unsure. If they’re open to discussion, talk about your next actions.

If they never show up or deny, it’s your body and your call.

8. Relieve the stress

Stress is a threat to pregnant women, so find ways to deal with it. Regardless of your decision, take care of your emotional state.

Try anything that calms your mind. Or, seek an expert to know healthy ways to cope with pregnancy stress. Your body also needs nourishment and sleep.

9. Settle what you want

With a calm mind, ponder on the options (point 3). There’s no pressure, do what you see fit.

Decide if you really want to be a mother. If yes, can you take its complete responsibility even without its father?

If you can’t, then think about the other two options… can you put them up for abortion? Are you emotionally ready for that?

It’s your life, you get to choose.

10. Seek an Ob/GYN

Found your route? Now time to consult an expert about your steps. They can lead you through abortion, or help you give birth to a healthy child.

An OB/GYN will help you through important steps and follow-ups too.

Fall in love too soon? Let’s know…


How to avoid falling for a one night stand?

Do you easily catch feelings? Have a hard time separating feelings from sex? Sucks to be the only one having unrealistic expectations… while they have another ONS. 

Wanna have ONS without falling for them? Follow me!

1. Interrogate your intentions

First up, ask yourself, what do you really want? Brush off any thoughts of marrying your ONS. Discuss your intentions with a friend.

Don’t hope they’ll beg for another hook-up. Look up the list of Do’s and Don’ts to make sure you don’t expect too much from it.

2. Remind yourself of the aim

Before you flirt or get into bed with them, always remember what you want. To avoid falling in love, stick to your word… chant it like a mantra, “I wanted to have fun, not find a groom/bride”.

It’s not that you won’t have other sexual encounters. Don’t let their thoughts invade your mind.

3. Share the idea

When you find one, ask them how they feel about one-night stands, or tell them you only want a night’s excitement. Also, be aloof, don’t talk about your parents or your dog.

Don’t talk about mutual interest unless it’s about sex. Pick someone with very little mutual nonsexual interests with you.

4. Skip the night stay

Unless you’re drunk, drowsy, sick, or it’s too late to be outside, leave immediately. You don’t really owe them a cuddle sesh for nice sex.

If you’re one to catch feelings too soon, add a no-cuddle rule.

If they’re over at yours, book them a cab, drop them at their place, or say you’ll be busy with something. Send them off respectfully.

5. Or, leave soon in the morning

If you stay over, mention that you have plans early in the morning. Then they won’t expect to see you when they wake up. If they urge you to stay back, tell them “it was a nice experience but leave”.

If they’re at your place, tell them you’ll leave within 30 minutes of them waking… they’ll get the hint.

6. Don’t connect online

Don’t exchange phone numbers… that’s where the drama begins.

Also, don’t look them up online. Social media pictures might get your heart in a twist. Further, if they send you requests to add, decline.

To be polite, add the message “I had a great time, but that’s all I needed”.

7. Stick to the definition

The name says ONE-night stand… so don’t hope for seconds even if it was delish. Don’t ask them to hook up or agree if they ask you again. Play by the rules to keep emotions at bay.

Don’t give yourself the “One last time won’t hurt”… because it will hurt too hard.

8. It was all casual

Whenever you remember how good it felt, remind yourself of the aim again. You were hungry for something so you had it… but that can’t be in your daily diet.

If you miss sex, hook up with someone new. Also, if you love their personality, note it down in your mind. Apply it when you’re ready for commitments.

9. Focus on the mismatches

Another way to distract them from their thoughts: Magnify the mismatches.

Remember how unkempt they were downstairs… how sloppy their pickup line was… or how your friends say you guys don’t match. Ponder more on the negatives to quickly get over them.

10. Ditch ONS

If you can’t help but fall for them, simply ditch this lifestyle. Don’t seek one-night stands anymore. Look for serious relationships, go out on dates, and don’t have sex on first dates.

Take your time to know others well. Update your profile in dating apps with “into commitments/serious relationships”. Go out with friends and family to find your perfect match.

Had a fun night? Thinking about how to deal with the next morning? Let’s know…


What to do in the morning after a one night stand?

The following mornings of ONS are always full of awkward silence. You don’t know where you are, where your clothes went, what’s with the stinky breath on your face… you’re at a total loss!

So follow these to deal with it…

1. Don’t waste time on the bed

Whether it’s a hangover or your friend’s text about your hot date… get off the bed. It’s not yours, vacate the bed… they possibly wanna clean up after you leave.

Also, don’t backbitch in front of them. Even stable partners hate it when their partner stays in bed too long.

2. Make an early run for it

The moment you hear the crows caw or the sun shines at you, gotta leave. Make it early, and fast, that’s what you both want. 

They’re not the lover you might snuggle up to.

3. Don’t touch their things

You’re in a new place, there’ll be interesting objects around. But resist the urge to touch things because you’re “not” welcome. You might find something unsightly so leave on a good note.

4. Switch on a distraction

If the hangover’s too hard, you’ll have a tough time waking up. Plugin your earphones and turn on upbeat music.

You’ll feel energized and less awkward about your morning breath.

5. Don’t scatter your clothes

Usually, hardly anybody can do this. In the heat of the moment, you throw your undies at god-knows-where.

However, the morning scavenger hunt for clothes while nude is too painful… and shameful. Rather place them in a bag or a desk.

6. Be realistic

Whether you exchange contacts or they say “See you”, don’t expect anything more from them. Wish them the best before leaving and don’t ask them when you’ll meet next.

It probably won’t be anytime soon, or ever. If it’s in your fate, you might… but don’t hold on to expectations.

7. Don’t go on dates

Breakfast or brunch dates are a big NO! It instills feelings in you both, isn’t that foul play? Dates after hook-ups reek of feelings… if you’re not serious about one another, go to Starbucks alone.

8. Don’t borrow stuff

Whether it’s the girl’s father’s shirt or the boy’s hoodie… don’t ever borrow anything. If you’re out of cash, ask your friend.

ONS partners don’t like lending stuff… they know they won’t see you anymore. Rather, they won’t try to see you anymore, not even for their stuff.

9. Expect a drop

If you hook up with a woman, she’ll at least show you to the gates… If it’s a man, he must drop you out of the complex… somewhere you can get a commute.

That’s basic manners you can expect. If they don’t, know you are hooked with a selfish jerk.

10. Join the fun

While you return in your haggard state the next morning, people will make fun of your walk of shame… and that’s alright!

The world loves making fun of others, don’t take it to heart… instead, join them. After all, you have every reason to be happy after the previous night.

Wondering what happens on a one-night stand? Let’s peep…


Awkward things you may face in a one night stand

What do you expect from hooking up with a random Joe/Jenny? Think you’ll have grand treatment? Contrarily it’s worse because they’ll never see you again. Let’s know how…

1. While traveling to theirs, you’ll do awkward small-talk… pretend to show interest in their life. But in reality, you hardly care.

2. If you visit their place directly, you’ll have a friendly conversation with their flatmates. But you’re aware that they’re checking out their mate’s taste.

3. You gingerly enter their room, and sit at the corner of the bed. You’ll try hitting a convo about their posters. But fail miserably because you hardly know what’s that about… and later find out they’re too passionate about it.

4. Though you know your business, you still play cool checking their Netflix.

5. You go in for a cuddle within moments of knowing each other.

6. You have a mini-argument over the contraceptive type. Many men try to skip the condom because “they won’t fit”… but they’re just stubborn and drunk.

7. After finishing you gotta wait until they get you a towel… because you don’t know where things are.

8. Since you can’t find your clothes, you wear theirs and run for a quick pee… because you gotta show them you’re manly/lady-like. But it becomes the longest pee or worse dump of your life.

9. You return to the room hoping for a night stay offer, which they unwillingly give. But you gotta beg for pillows and clean sheets… because there are obvious stains on their dark sheets.

10. When you ask them for water, they’ll get it – but in a brittle glass.

11. When the lights go off, you awkwardly wait for a snore or an arm around you. But if it’s a small bed, you cuddle to hold on to dear life. While they’re out like a baby, you count sheep and contemplate your worst choices.

12. The following morning they either ask you to stay back or kick you out. Or, if it was at your place, you walk them out and hope nobody catches you.

13. They see you off while you ponder long on how to bid adieu… then settle for a clumsy hug.

14. Though you know you’ll never see one another, you exchange contacts.

15. While you return, conservative people’s judgmental stare makes you hate yourself. However, you know you loved it and repeat it once more.

A word from ThePleasantRelationship

One-night stands are great if you’re honest with yourself. Without any hopes for emotional attachment, you’ll have many great once-in-a-lifetime experiences.

Since this is not for everyone, tread on this path very carefully. Know what you truly want and take your partner’s consent.

It’s a wonderful thing if both sides fulfill their expectations mutually.

However, hopes for commitments makes their entire experience bitter. So, hold on strongly to your heart and try your best to suppress any emotions.

If you seem to fail miserably, know ONS isn’t for you… and that’s fine. Look forth to serious long-term relationships instead, and find your kind of happiness.