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How To Tell Your Boyfriend You Need More Attention? – 20 Actionable Ways To Get What You Need

How To Tell Your Boyfriend You Need More Attention? – 20 Actionable Ways To Get What You Need

Published on Sep 14, 2023

How To Tell Your Boyfriend You Need More Attention - 20 Actionable Ways To Get What You Need

So, you’re wondering how to tell your boyfriend you need more attention. You want some princess treatment in your relationship but don’t know how to make that happen.

The desire for increased attention from your partner is a normal aspect of human connection. So, firstly, don’t feel ashamed. Even if anyone tells, remember this isn’t clinginess!

Now, to save your relationship and make sure that you feel satisfied, keep reading!

How To Tell Your Boyfriend You Need More Attention? – 20 Ways

Whether you’ve been together for a short time or many years, plenty of effort and attention is necessary to maintain a healthy and satisfying relationship. But if your man can’t give you enough attention, it can be strenuous for your relationship. 

So, to fix this matter, let’s follow these following ways… 

1. Flirt with him

Flirt to highlight what you enjoy about him and your relationship. Compliment his qualities or reminisce about memorable moments you’ve shared.

As the flirting continues, gently transition into more direct communication about your need for attention. 

For example, say, “I love when we have these flirty moments. It makes me feel even closer to you. I’d really appreciate more of these.”

2. Don’t overthink 

Trust your feelings and emotions. Understand that wanting more attention from your man is okay.

Recognize and understand your feelings before discussing them with your boyfriend. Know what you need, and it will help you express yourself more clearly. 

Clarify why you feel like you need more attention. The underlying reasons can help your boyfriend empathize with you better.

3. Understand your boyfriend’s perspective 

Consider your boyfriend’s feelings and perspective. Try to understand his point of view and recognize that he may have reasons for his behavior in the relationship.

Approach the conversation with empathy. This can create a more open and supportive environment for discussing your need for more attention in the relationship.

4. Offer him space 

Space allows your boyfriend to adjust at his own pace. It reduces potential pressure or discomfort. 

So, give him time to express affection in his own way. Pay attention to how he interacts with you and the relationship over time. He might be showing you attention in his own way.

5. Avoid the role of second mother 

Instead of taking on a motherly role, encourage him to take initiative and be responsible for his actions and decisions.

It helps to maintain a sense of equality and partnership. This prevents potential resentment or dependency, and thus, he’ll know that you also have needs.

6. Ask him if he’s satisfied 

Ask how he’s feeling in the relationship and whether his needs are being met. After listening to him, tell him how you’d try to meet his needs. Show that you value his satisfaction and are willing to work together to strengthen the relationship. 

Then, he’d ask about you to share your own feelings and needs. That’s when you must express yourself.

7. Confess how bad you feel about a specific situation 

Identify particular situations or instances where you felt your need for attention was not met. Mention that and describe why it matters so much to you. 

You can say, “When I feel neglected, it affects my overall happiness in the relationship, and I want us to be closer.”

8. Prefer writing if you’re not pro in expressing 

Writing can be a therapeutic way to clarify your own thoughts and emotions.

It reduces the potential for misunderstandings during verbal communication. This is because sometimes partners don’t listen to each other completely and imagine the rest of the matter. 

So, take your time to articulate your thoughts and feelings in writing. You can suggest discussing the matter further in person at the end of the note.

9. Be thankful for what he does

Mention particular actions or gestures that you appreciate. It could be as simple as thanking him for a thoughtful message or a special date night.

This will help him understand what you like and do those and things alike more.

10. Give him more attention to receive attention 

It’s essential to maintain a balance in the relationship. So, pay him more attention to receive it in return.

Your actions can serve as an example and inspire him to be more attentive. Show physical affection, like hugs, kisses, and cuddling, to express your love and desire for closeness.

11. Ask him to stay in contact  

Be straightforward and ask for more calls or texts. Mention if you’d like daily check-ins, occasional messages throughout the day, or longer phone conversations.

This will address your need for attention in a clear and actionable way. Clearly state what you’re looking for. 

12. Mark your presence on his social media platforms 

Like and comment on his social media posts when you genuinely appreciate or relate to the content. Use this as an opportunity to connect over shared interests.

Occasionally post about your activities together or special moments you’ve shared. It can indirectly make him pay more attention to you.

13. Ask him for his time and attention directly

Tell him directly that you want to spend quality time together. Express why spending more time together matters, whether to deepen your bond, strengthen your connection, or enjoy each other’s company. 

Be specific to help your boyfriend understand what you’re looking for and how he can fulfill your need for more attention.

14. Plan a getaway 

Actively plan dates or getaways to create opportunities for quality bonding time. This will fulfill your need for more attention and build a stronger relationship.

Share the ideas that seem most enjoyable for both of you. Be thoughtful and considerate of his interests. 

15. Play hard to get

If giving him more attention or being upfront doesn’t work, give him a taste of his own medicine. 

Get so busy that he hardly gets any time from you. Once he understands the value of paying attention, he’ll know what he’s done!

If he cares enough about you, he’ll also fix his actions and be more attentive to you.

16. Ask him for help

Ask your boyfriend for help to indirectly express your need for attention. Especially if this task involves spending time together or engaging in bonding activities, it’ll be great!

It’ll create an opportunity for both of you to work together to improve the relationship. This will also show that you value his input in your life.

17. Send him lovely messages 

This is a sweet and affectionate way to communicate your need for more attention in the relationship. 

Send these messages at times when they will have the most impact, such as when he’s at work, after a significant conversation, or when you’re apart.

18. Don’t force him

Avoid pressuring him to provide more attention immediately. Understand that changes may take time, and be patient with the process.

This will help you respect his autonomy, and he won’t feel forced or overwhelmed.

19. Express the excitement to meet him

Show genuine excitement and enthusiasm when you make plans to see him. Let him know how much you’re looking forward to spending time together.

When you make seeing him a big deal, your enthusiasm and commitment to him becomes obvious.

It indirectly shows you need more attention by prioritizing quality time together and creating memorable experiences. 

20. Remember, he can’t read your mind

Nobody is a mind-reader, so don’t expect him to understand the issue on his own. Don’t show passive aggression, as that will never help in such situations. 

In fact, he might not have any idea at all about your needs. He might also be willing to make you happy in any possible way. So, guide him instead of silently expecting things. 

A word from ThePleasantRelationship

Remember that every relationship is unique. Finding the right balance of attention that works for you and your boyfriend may take time. 

Open and honest communication, patience, and a willingness to work together are key to resolving this issue and maintaining a healthy relationship.

But if he still doesn’t pay you enough attention, consider seeking professional help.