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Fake Relationship – Definition, Signs, How to End it, and Everything Else 

Fake Relationship – Definition, Signs, How to End it, and Everything Else 

Updated on Sep 13, 2023

Reviewed by Katina Tarver, MA (Mental Health and Wellness Counseling) , Life & Relationship Coach

Fake Relationship - Definition, Signs, How to End it, and More

You won’t believe it but the happy and cute couple on social media is most probably a fake relationship.

They seem like the very epitome of perfection and romance… but behind the scenes, the cruel picture of constant arguments, bitterness, and lack of understanding prevails!

So, are you worried that you’re also in one?

Don’t worry, with my think-piece, let’s find out the truth here…

What is a fake relationship?

A fake relationship is one that outsiders think is the perfect fairytale union, but inside they’re far from being in love. While one person is there for love, the other only wants comfort and benefits.

In a fake relationship, your partner confesses their undying love to you, but deep inside they’re uncertain about their own feelings.

Outsiders think you’re a happy couple that tries their best to cherish each other. However, in reality, your partner is only pretending to love you.

So, even if you truly love your partner, your partner might not be truly invested in the relationship.

You might not even be aware that you’re in a fake relationship instantly… but with time, you’ll know that something is wrong.

Since the relationship exists to maintain the illusion of a perfect life… or to meet one partner’s desire for money or fame, the relationship gives away the signs of being fake sooner or later.

Wondering how a fake relationship differs from a real one? Let’s know that here…

Real relationship vs Fake relationship

In a real relationship, your partner makes efforts to make you feel cherished. But in a fake relationship, you might feel “loved” only when you’re around others. Otherwise, you feel lonely, anxious, and sad.

In a true relationship, you’ll feel true love and heartfelt romantic gestures. You’ll hold deep conversations. You’ll approach each other even without ulterior motives… just to bond. You feel happy, respected, and satisfied in true love.

Whereas in a fake relationship, you’ll feel a void inside your heart. The entire relationship is to put on a show in front of others. So, in others’ absence, you won’t ever receive the warmth of love.

In a fake relationship, your partner might only appreciate you when you’re in front of others. Fake love is only skin-deep. You never try to know each other deeply. Instead, the relationship stands on only sex, shallow connection, and endless irritation and conflicts.

A fake relationship makes you unhappy, lonely, and insecure. You always tiptoe around the relationship because you don’t want to fight with each other.

Worried if your relationship is fake? Let’s find that out here…

What are the signs of a fake relationship?

Nobody is ready to believe they’re in a fake relationship… even if their instincts say something is off.

After all, finding that your beloved only wants to take advantage of you is the most painful thing ever. But, you need to protect yourself before things get worse. So, read these signs and find out if they seem familiar.

1. Their romanticism is erratic

People might be in fake relationships just for the richer person’s money. So, beware if there’s a huge difference in your and your partner’s finances.

To know if your relationship is fake, notice how and when your partner makes an effort.

When you don’t do anything grand or give a luxurious gift to your partner… if they put effort regardless, don’t worry. But if their efforts are connected with your money… That’s a red flag!

2. You don’t feel heard

In healthy relationships, partners pay attention to each other’s words. They don’t let their mind lose track… unless they’re not interested in you or your life.

So, next time you spend time together, remind them about an old time: “Do you remember about the time…” Don’t mention the entire story and tell them a follow-up incident about that.

If they seem puzzled, those are your tell-tale signs.

3. The conversations are too shallow

In healthy and happy relationships, conversations are usually about a lot of deep things like your expectations, fears, likes, dislikes, and many more deep topics.

However, if your partner only asks about your day, what you’re doing, the weather, and such monotonous and formal things, it’s pretty much a fake relationship.

After all, your spouse isn’t the least bothered about your feelings.

4. They act sweet only if their friends are around you

If your partner usually acts cold towards you but becomes extra caring, kind, and romantic around people, it’s all a farce.

They’re probably jealous of their friends’ fulfilling life and feel insecure about their own. So, they want to use you to pretend to have a great life.

They might show excess PDA but hardly even hold your hand at home. It’s all because you’re a trophy partner to them.

5. They’re never ready for family introductions

If your relationship is only a month or so long, being introduced to their family or introducing them to your loved ones is a bit too hasty.

However, if your relationship is running for almost a year or even longer, the family introduction is a basic must.

So, when your partner goes on a family trip, ask them to include you in it… or, invite them to a party at your place. If they always refuse you, know that they were never serious about you!

6. You guys never cuddle after sex

After having mind-blowing sex, notice your partner’s next move. If they cuddle you, say sweet words, or even hug you to sleep, that’s a sign of true love.

On the other hand, some signs of fake love in this situation are: If it’s their place, they might get busy with their phone or start gaming. Even worse, they might ask to drop you off at your place. If it’s your place, they might leave right away.

If they don’t try to emotionally connect with you afterward, you know it’s not worth it!

7. You feel there’s a lot left to know about them

Another red flag of a fake relationship is the feeling… that you don’t know them. You talk to them a lot… but then you realize that you don’t know them even a bit.

It’s often because your partner hardly opens up to you. It’s always you pouring your heart out in the conversations.

You might know about your common likes and dislikes… but nothing about the differences or uniqueness.

8. The relationship lacks sweet gestures

Sweet gestures like flowers, chocolates, ice cream, or even cards on special occasions make a person feel loved. But romance doesn’t always have to be bought with money.

It can be as simple as cooking breakfast for your partner. They might take you out when you’re low… and remind you you’re the best and they can’t stand it when you’re sad.

However, if nothing like that happens, you might be in a fake relationship.

9. They never mention the future

Partners that are truly invested in each other will talk about the future at some point in the relationship.

If you guys are together only for a few months or so, future talks will go like: “Keep your Christmas Eve free. We’ll go…” even before it’s Halloween.

If you’re in a long-term relationship, future talks are more about the next step in your career, settling down, marriage, house, car, kids, etc.  

If none of that happens… that’s another warning sign!

10. So much conflict yet no resolution

In a fake relationship, you guys don’t know each other, so you both will slip up and get on each other’s nerves frequently. There will be lots of fights.

However, it doesn’t end there. If your partner doesn’t love you at all, they won’t care about how you feel after the fight. They’ll never take steps to resolve the issues.

Instead, they’ll continuously ignore you and won’t even mind if you don’t talk to each other for days.

11. Your crisis gets ignored

When you express your worries to your partner, if they make efforts to reassure and support you through difficulties, that’s a great sign of a harmonious relationship. A loving partner will always validate you and make you feel safe.

But, if your partner never comforts you during tough times and even seems indifferent to you… that’s not a good sign. If they don’t even console you or reach out on your bad days and you’re left to fend for yourself, that’s a huge red flag.

12. They never take your plans seriously

In happy relationships, couples take every chance to bond and spend time with each other. They get excited over the date nights and trips… and plan a lot for that.

So, when you ask your partner out, take note of their reaction. If they never respect the time you spend on the plans, make fun of the preparations, find fault with your planning… or even stand you up, that’s a toxic fake relationship, hun!

13. They always forget everything about you

You asked your partner to call or text you once they reach home. You asked them to pick up the laundry on their way back. You give them a list of the grocery stores.

If you often hear “I’m sorry… I forgot to…”, you feel frustrated. Forgetfulness is normal but if that happens ritually, they hardly care about the relationship. They can be so unreliable only because it’s a fake relationship.

14. You heard too much about their ex

A rebound relationship also falls under the category of fake relationships.

So, beware if your partner often says “You’re so much hotter than Rebecca!” “Jake was never so sweet to me!” “My ex was a total disappointment… I’m so glad to have a reliable person beside me.”

These might seem like compliments… but look at how it’s always a comparison with their ex. It’s clear that they’re not over them. Instead, they want to use you as a rebound to feel better about themselves.

15. There are white lies… but too many of them

White lies are so common and harmless that nobody will take them offensively… that’s what everyone thought. Well, they don’t stay harmless anymore if it’s used to deceive you and not spend time with you.

So, if bae tells you they’ll be busy with work on the weekend but then someone posts a picture of them partying together… it’ll hurt a lot. If this happens often, that’s one of the major signs of a fake relationship.

16. They only want a relationship… not you

One way to understand whether your relationship is real or fake is to know their motives. Notice if your partner only wants the tag of “being taken”, “dating a hot gal”, or “dating a rich man”.

This means they’re not in love with you… instead, they’ll be happy as long as they have a partner of preferred aesthetics, popularity, or with enough cash on them. They see you as a package… not a person.

17. Only you change for them

It’s hard to find a lover that’s completely like you. So, even though couples have differences, they try to compromise equally in a healthy relationship.

But, between you guys, if you’re the only one making compromises and changing… that’s no good. If your partner can’t ever be on the same page as you… it’ll be frustrating.

Moreover, if you unknowingly compromise most of the time, that’s the proof it’s fake.  After all, your partner doesn’t even notice your problem and only wants to be pleased.

18. Nothing happens unless you initiate it

Who plans the dates? Who chooses the venue? Who initiates texts and calls? Who sends the “I miss you” first? Who sends surprises more often?

If it’s always you, there’s no better sign of a one-sided and fake relationship.

If your partner liked you even a bit, they’d try their best to make you feel special. But if they can’t even text or call you… they don’t hold you dear… it’s nothing but a fake.

19. Your instincts say that it’s the end

Your instincts never lie to you. Because it picks on the signs that your conscious mind doesn’t notice and comes to the conclusion.

So, if you feel the days of your relationship are numbered… or that your partner might soon get fed up and leave you… something is definitely wrong in the relationship.

Every time you fight, if you feel you’ll get a “Let’s end this” text, that relationship has no foundation! It’s a fake, to say the least.

20. There’s zero intimacy!

A romantic relationship is all about depth. How deeply you know each other… how much you’re ready to dive to understand each other. Perhaps, you try your best and still feel something is missing.

So, if your partner hardly tries to bond with you or that only you try to grow intimate in the relationship… and they only want you for partying and gifts, it’s undoubtedly a fake relationship.

21. The “sweet talks” are absolutely hollow

When they want to ask you for favors… whether for sex, to seek financial help, gifts, or even to show you off to others… your partner in a fake relationship will know exactly what to say.

They’ll say the sweetest and most heart-melting words… they’ll make you believe that you’re the love of their life and they truly cherish you. But when you give them what they want and the night’s over, things return to square one!

22. Everything makes to the social media

Observe how your partner portrays your relationship on social media. If they become extra lovey-dovey and add a flood of posts about you only if… you give them a gift, they gift you something, or you guys have a grand date… that’s fishy.

Moreover, if they force you into doing the same… nothing screams more “fake” than that.

They only want you for the online clout from showing off that they have a perfect life.

23. They only want to be right during fights

When couples fight, they must remember that they’re on the same team… and the fight is against the issue and not themselves.

However, during your fights, if your partner plays dirty just to win and have the upper hand over the relationship, they don’t truly love you.

Instead, they’re in love with victory, fame, and glory. Perhaps they’re in a relationship with you exactly for that.

24. There’s no space for communication

True love feels so soothing because partners communicate everything to each other. The satisfaction level rises with the transparency in the relationship. They even work on their communication skills to make the relationship healthier.

However, when someone pretends to be in love, they don’t want anything with communication, transparency, or satisfaction. After all, they only want favors from you or wish to use you… and they have their own tactics for that.

25. They’re never excited to meet you

In a healthy and happy relationship, couples feel supper excited around each other. They feel ecstatic to plan for their next dates, scroll through different date ideas, build a couples bucket list, and so much more.

However, if your partner seems too bored during these mini plans… no matter how far-fetched or impossible the plan seems… that’s a red flag. They’re just not keen on making memories with you.

26. Sex is the only good part

Another glaring sign of a fake relationship is the addiction to sex. You both can bond in many ways in the relationship. You can talk, partake in each other’s interests, enjoy thrilling activities, and more.

However, if all of your dates are about having sex… that’s all there to it. You’re only sexually compatible… and only that keeps you together. Remove that from the equation and the façade will collapse.

27. They’re excessively worried about your looks

Decking up for date nights and social outings may appear great, but you might not always be in the mood. Someday you want to look more casual, comfortable, and confident in your own skin.

However, if your partner gets angry when you don’t put on makeup or groom yourself like a Greek God… or even refuses to take you to the party, they only treat you as a trophy partner. They keep you beside them to show you off.

If you didn’t look as hot and attractive, they probably would have chosen someone else.

28. You feel you’re growing apart

Every passing day, if you feel that you’re growing apart instead of knowing each other, that’s a sign of a lack of emotional intimacy.

In your relationship, if you feel an unnatural distance between you guys but can’t really understand what’s wrong… then this is your first time in a fake relationship. You’re used to being in real relationships, so you’re confused with the situation.

29. You never spend quality time

If you guys live together, you probably spend a lot of time together. But, even after staying together for long hours, if you both hardly talk or pay attention to each other, that’s a worrisome sign.

If they’re always busy with their phone or something else… if they even turn down your offers to read or watch something together, they simply don’t want to spend quality time with you! That’s an alarming sign of a fake relationship.

30. They strictly asked you to not share relationship issues with others

Troubles and conflicts are normal in relationships. So, to make a relationship work beyond these issues, people often ask around their friends or family for help and guidance. 

However, if your partner doesn’t want you to talk about it to others… something’s off. They probably want to maintain the illusion of being head over heels for each other.

Probably, he wants to show off to his friends that you’re the perfect couple… and if you share that with your people, it might spoil the game.

31. Despite your attempts, you just can’t connect

During the first few dates, couples hesitate to express themselves as they always worry about showing their best side to each other. However, that hesitation vanishes with time, and couples can engage in effortless conversations.

However, even after a long time, if the conversations are still not smooth and you run into dead ends and awkward silences, that means your partner just doesn’t get you… or maybe they don’t plan to get you because this isn’t a real relationship.

32. You feel confused almost about everything

Whenever you’re alone, your thoughts about your relationship can tell a lot about it. If you usually reminisce about your dates, your partner’s antics, and all other fun and sweet times, that’s a good sign of a healthy relationship.

But it’s a bad sign if your thoughts are full of confusion and you frequently think about…

What are we? Do they love me? How much do they love me?

These questions only mean that your partner never conveyed that they love you… it’s probably because they don’t truly love you.

33. You don’t have any sweet memories

In true love, every moment you spend becomes memorable. You might even want to frame every day of it. So, go ahead and take a minute to remember all the memorable things you did.

If you can’t remember anything memorable… if nothing makes you smile about your relationship so far… if your mind is filled with depressive memories of the past, you got your answer, right?

You don’t deserve to suffer like this, so think if it’s really worth staying.

34. There’s an issue about professional status

If you can’t grab a promotion or lose a major project or business ally, you’ll be the most disappointed. In this situation, you return home and tell your partner about the situation.

A loving partner will normally console you. But, if they start biting you with mean words and hurt you by saying you’re worthless, aren’t serious, or are a disappointment.

They’re clearly obsessed with your potential and the money you might earn. Everything about it is fake.

35. They act cold when it’s just you guys

Lovey-dovey couples tell each other about everything they’re passionate about. They pour out all their emotions and energy and expect them to reciprocate the feelings and get encouraged.

But if you express yourself but your partner doesn’t show any emotions… instead they zone out in the middle of the conversation or tell you they’ll talk later but never do, they don’t care about you at all.

They’re in the relationship only for the benefits!

Did lots of signs match your relationship? If yes, brush away those tears, and scroll down.

How to end a fake relationship

After finding out your partner’s intentions, you might want to get revenge on them or do something that’ll hurt them equally. But revenge never allows you to heal. Choose peace and be kind towards yourself. C’mon, let’s move on towards a better life here…

1. Communicate with a fresh mind

Before you jump to conclusions and attack them for faking love, calm down. This person played with your heart and manipulated your mind into believing that they loved you for so long.

If you don’t prepare yourself, you might not be able to convey your thoughts and feelings well. So, write down everything, and think about how you’ll approach them.

Especially, jot down all the signs that showed it’s a fake relationship. Tell them you want to change those areas of your relationship. If they refuse, it’s the end.

Make sure you have a face-to-face conversation only. This will help you understand their emotions through their expressions.

2. Don’t let the excuses fool you

When you tell them you won’t stand a relationship with such dynamics, they’ll be afraid of losing you. But it’s not because they love you. Rather, because they don’t have a backup plan.

So, whether they were with you for your money, looks, or status… they’ll look like a sore loser if you leave them suddenly. They’ll try to beg you back in the relationship.

They’ll remind you of non-existent sweet memories, promise to change, and remind you of the times you promised to stay with them and guilt trip you. Whatever they do, stand your ground and break up.

3. Never accept their plea to stay friends

If they can’t have you beside them as their partner, they’ll still try to bargain their chances. They’ll ask you to stay friends. That’s their way to stay in your life and influence you to patch up.

And even if you don’t fall for their tricks, they can still show off by posting pictures with you on the gram… after all, nobody will know that you guys broke up and are just friends.

On the other hand, if they’re with you for your money, they can easily manipulate you for gifts and favors like old times because you’re a friend.

4. Get rid of them and heal yourself

Break up for good and cut off contact with them. This will be hard if they’re a part of your professional, academic, or social life. Avoid them unless you don’t have any choice.

After the breakup, don’t jump into another relationship. Let your wounds heal before you return to the dating scene. Meanwhile, think about where you went wrong in the relationship. 

Understand what you truly deserve from a relationship. And most of all try to forget and move on. Forgive yourself for letting that good-for-nothing fool you.

5. Focus on life

The pain of being betrayed and used is too much to bear. Some people close their hearts toward love and romance permanently after such experiences. However, don’t take such drastic measures. If you can’t stop thinking about the past, keep yourself busy.

Go clubbing with your friends, help out your parents, and play with your nephews and nieces. Work hard in your academic and/or professional life, learn new skills, and increase your qualifications. Or, pick up new hobbies like dancing, singing, or cooking.

Do what you like to divert your mind and fill it with positivity. Remember that all human beings aren’t the same. But, if you can’t cope with the pain, seek a mental health professional.

A word from ThePleasantRelationship

In your fake relationship, you devoted everything you have to your partner… only to find out about their true nature now. You’re probably depressed about it… but be glad that you got rid of them!

That person was toxic and didn’t deserve you… so, even if it’s late, look at the brighter side. Even if you’re struggling after the breakup, don’t forget about the great possibilities ahead of you.

Take care of yourself, don’t entertain your ex anymore, and make yourself happy and proud. The right person will show up once you regain your confidence. And you’ll soon find true happiness!