How to deal with a bitter ex husband can be a difficult question. The answer depends mainly on your particular situation.
Whether he’s trying to manipulate you or just acting bitter because of the circumstances, all of that has a great role. It also takes time to understand and identify his patterns, and more than anything else, you must also be aware of your feelings.
However, you can go by some basic rules to diminish the chances of crossing paths with him and letting him affect you the least.
So, if you’re ready, let’s get started.
How To Deal With A Bitter Ex Husband? 15 Ways
If you divorced recently, it’s quite common for your ex-husband to act bitter and act against you verbally, emotionally, and even physically. All of that can be discouraging, and it will leave you exhausted.
If this is your situation, you must push yourself a bit more and put in the effort to deal with him for long-lasting peace.
Some of the ways that you can use are:
1. Notice Your Part Of The Conflict
It is common to ignore your faults when dealing with a bitter ex-husband. Understand that even if you are hurt, you can’t always be the good one.
Hence, it is time to own up to your part of the conflict and acknowledge it. This will give you a better perspective and allow you to deal better with a bitter ex-husband.
2. Try To Avoid Face To Face Communication
Ensure under all circumstances, you avoid all face-to-face communication with your ex-husband unless it is about the kids. This is one of the better-known ways to handle his bitterness.
If he insists, always give smart excuses and take yourself out of the situation. Face-to-face communication can get extremely bitter, particularly during the initial phase post-divorce.
3. Write Your Thoughts Out
When you are dealing with a negative and bitter ex-husband, you may get all confused and say the wrong things.
To avoid that, write down your thoughts. This will ensure that you can maintain a smooth flow and not get intimidated by him.
4. Agree With A Few Aspects of What Your Ex is Saying
To deal effectively with a bitter ex-husband, you must be extremely tactical under all circumstances.
Hence, if you keep denying everything he says, it will be detrimental. And you might end up with a full-blown long fight.
To avoid that, try to agree with a few things he says. It can be something very trivial, but it will make an impact. He will understand that you are not sitting to judge him.
5. Don’t Foster Negative Feelings For Your Ex In Your Children
This is a common mistake that many women make. When they want to deal with a bitter ex-husband, they foster negative feelings among the children. Avoid this under all circumstances.
You cannot drag your children into this because they will learn these tactics and become twisted human beings. Keep your children out of this and ensure they do not have any ill feelings towards their father.
6. Understand What He Wants
Sometimes, dealing with a bitter ex-husband can be as easy as understanding what he wants.
Much miscommunication arises because you do not understand what he wants. Instead, you often end up misinterpreting.
To ensure this is not the case, if you cannot understand, just ask them. Sometimes, he’s also confused about how he feels, which makes him bitter.
7. Don’t Fight Fire With Fire
While dealing with a bitter ex-husband, in many cases, he may turn dangerous and even pose direct harm. So, refrain from using similar tactics to ensure this does not go out of hand.
Fighting fire with fire will make the situation much bigger than it already is, which you have to avoid.
8. Understand Which One Is A Bait
A bitter ex always tries to get you to meet him face-to-face or react to him with different baits. In most cases, these are not visible to you. Be careful enough to understand which one is bait and how to avoid being trapped by that.
For instance, he might use fake emergencies to gain sympathy and get you to meet him. So learn to counter him on that.
The moment you step forth and take the bait, you will end up with major scars. So, pay attention to what he says and how he says it.
9. Bid Goodbye To Common Hangout Spots
Since you need to stop seeing him in person to avoid his bitterness, bid goodbye to all the common hangout spots unless a few months have passed.
This will help you get rid of the memories and protect yourself from his vicious grasp.
Don’t risk running into any angry ex because you do not know what kind of impact it might have.
10. Have Someone With Whom You Can Confide in
Sometimes, fighting this battle alone can get too much. This is where you need someone to listen to you and understand all your problems.
Find someone completely yours, so you can confide in them everything. They’ll be your trusted partners and will ensure you are heard under all circumstances.
11. Document Everything
A bitter ex is not always emotionally unstable. They are, in most cases, extremely sound and analytical in manipulating you.
Hence, the best way to deal with him is by documenting everything. Try to keep WhatsApp texts, emails, or even text messages as backup so that he cannot use anything against you.
12. Try Avoiding All Kinds of Escalations
Make a conscious effort to avoid any kind of escalations. He may try to escalate the conversation and turn it into a full-blown fight.
Be smart and vigilant enough to ensure that you can avoid all kinds of escalations and not let them go out of hand.
13. Be Transparent On The Expenses Segment
With a bitter ex, it is crucial that you discuss the expenses beforehand, especially if there are kids involved. Ensure everything is clear so that later on, they cannot deny any kind of expenses and put you in trouble.
This should be done right at the beginning, and you should have someone who will be a witness. The best way to deal with this is via legal implications.
14. Talk To Him About Why He Hates You
It is possible that your ex is not bitter, but they have turned bitter due to the instances between you both. Or, perhaps he’s just not coping well with the divorce.
The best way to deal with such cases is to ask him openly why he is so bitter to you and what makes him hate you so much.
If your ex is originally not such a person, then there are high chances that he will open up and things will get better between you two.
15. Break All Connections With Him
If none of the tips we have mentioned work, the best way to deal with a bitter ex is by breaking off all connections with him.
Change your number or block him; do not entertain him if he shows up at your door. And if necessary, bid goodbye to your common friends and relatives. This will be difficult, but you will feel the impact after a certain period.
A word from ThePleasantRelationship
Dealing with a bitter ex is extremely difficult. Particularly if he is violent, the problems are manifold.
Try to deter him with the above ideas. But if you notice that he has started to become aggressive, you need to bring the matter under the purview of authorities at the earliest.
Try to reach out to his friends and family to let them know what he is doing and ask them to make him understand. Keep your children from this complex situation, as it can harm them.
Make wise choices to protect yourself and your loved ones!
Are you interested to know more about ‘How To Know If Your Married Ex Still Loves You’ then click here?
Surabhi wakes up every day with a drive to craft words that can create a soulful impact. Creatively adventurous, she is always seeking to learn new skills and acquire new experiences. With a hidden soft corner for languages (especially Urdu), she writes poetry occasionally, binges on romantic shows, and LOVES to talk. A hustler, admirer, chaser, Surabhi is just another-someone who refused to give up on her dreams. She says, she is just somebody who’s trying to make herself a writer and for now, she’s just writing...