Are you wondering how divorce changes a man? Or whether it affects a man at all?
Divorce is a traumatic experience. It not only changes the woman but, at the same time, takes a toll on the man as well.
The most classic way a man changes after a divorce is by completely withdrawing from social activities, whether going out or attending parties.
But there are many other ways, so let’s keep reading to know more…
16 Ways How Divorce Changes A Man
Men often feel many emotions after a divorce but find it extremely hard to express. They also start self-blaming and thinking that it is only because of their activities and probably negligence that the relationship fell apart.
C’mon, let’s know all the changes and struggles a man faces post-divorce here…
1. He suppresses his emotions
Society instills in guys’ minds that they are not supposed to express their emotions or cry. Even after a divorce, most men try to suppress their emotions.
Even if a man is pretty expressive, he retreats to his cocoon. He believes that sharing emotions will not do any good but only complicate the process.
2. He spends more time outside
After a divorce, a divorced man does not want to return home as he feels lonely. This is often referred to as “empty nest syndrome.”
Since he feels that his home is empty, there is nothing he can return to. In such times, you notice a man wants to spend more time outside.
This can worsen the situation, as sometimes, most divorced guys do not return to their house for days.
3. He becomes financially unstable
A divorce can get expensive as men often have to spend more money on alimony and child care.
This puts the divorced guy under much financial insecurity. He changes his work and often gets involved in double shifts to make money.
He needs a lot of time and effort to solve these financial insecurities. Consequently, it takes a toll on the man.
4. He fears restarting life
A man might be originally optimistic and believe in giving life a second chance.
But after a divorce, it is common for any man to get completely skeptical about restarting. It is because he does not know if he can give another person a chance.
The fear sometimes gets so severe that most divorced guys do not go for a second relationship.
5. He finds difficulting to adapt to situations
Things change after a divorce. The guy has to manage everything independently, which often takes a toll. It becomes extremely difficult for the divorced guy to adapt.
Also, to effectively manage everything, a man needs some time. After all, usually, men depend on their wives for a lot of things.
This sudden shift in responsibility changes a man’s attitude and also the way he perceives the world.
He might become responsible and realize how his wife kept things together.
6. He faces a loss of identity
It is a common change noted after any divorce. Irrespective of why the divorce happened, most men tend to face a loss of identity.
This usually stems because a divorced man loses a big part of his family – his wife and kids.
After the divorce, he wonders about the meaning of his existence and purpose in life. Because until he was married, his motivation was protecting and providing for the family.
He ends up with questions like ” Why am I working?” or “Who will I take care of?”
A divorced man often questions why he should continue to function every day when his wife and children are not there with him
7. He loses interest in work
In most cases, a divorced man loses his motivation to work. Since he has nobody to feed, provide shelter, or buy necessities for, he just doesn’t find any meaning to his job.
The quality of work declines, as there is no desire to achieve more things. He might even feel that it’s okay if he gets paid less or gets demoted.
8. His health is compromised
The health of a divorced man often deteriorates drastically, and there are quite a few reasons behind this.
One of the most common reasons is that the wife, in most cases, takes much care of the husband and ensures that his diet and medications are not compromised.
However, after the divorce, men often can’t focus both on work and healthy meals. He develops a poor lifestyle, and this affects his health.
Furthermore, since he’s less likely to return home, he also has a higher chance of eating junk or instant food than something nutritious.
A man might also develop heart problems due to high stress. Some studies have pointed out that divorced men are more likely to develop cancer. They are also more susceptible to weight changes and prone to losing their immunity.
9. He develops anxiety
It’s not only about the physical health of a man. Even the emotional health of a divorced man completely changes.
He often develops serious cases of anxiety and depression. He feels anxious about how he will restart life on his own or what the future holds.
Depression usually starts from the feelings of not being able to spend time together again as a family. Sometimes, divorced men are socially isolated as well. This brings them closer to depression.
10. Some opt for rebound relationships
After a divorce, a man can’t accept that his desire to build a family is crushed. This makes him inclined toward a rebound relationship.
The only purpose behind this relationship is to feel good about themselves again. He might go further down this path and spoil his chances of building a family again.
11. He develops toxic habits
This might be things like incessant drinking, smoking, or even worse habits like drug use and gambling.
Some men do it in moderation. However, there are others who often make it a pattern of life.
Since they have nothing to lose in life and don’t know how to cope with the issue, these addictions seem like a pretty good distraction.
12. He gets trust issues
A divorced man often becomes too shaky to commit or confess his love to anyone else. It is because he started developing trust issues.
It usually happens if he gets cheated on by his partner. Or if the divorce happens due to sudden and unanticipated issues.
If not addressed at the right time, the trust issues can get deep and alter the man’s personality.
This changes the relationship dynamics of all of his future prospective connections for the worse.
13. He blames himself
When a divorced man realizes his life is devastated in a number of ways, he starts blaming himself. He believes he’s the reason behind everything.
He regrets not giving his wife enough time. Further, he feels ashamed that he couldn’t be good enough for his family.
Of course, this effect doesn’t show up in all men. It happens only to the ones who actually regret their actions or deeply loved their families.
14. He doesn’t feel interested in socializing
A divorced man also stops meeting friends and family. Earlier, he used to show up with his wife and/or kids to places. He always felt complete around other buddies who also have a thriving family life.
But now, he just feels ashamed and less than others because he’s alone. He doesn’t want to stick out like a sore thumb with no partner and feel awkward. It’s also because he doesn’t have much in common with his friends who would talk about their marriage.
15. He gets estranged from his children
After a divorce, the guy’s relationship with the child completely changes. In most cases, the fathers are not given the child’s custody. Hence, it might strain the relationship where the father cannot see the child regularly or even have an uninterrupted conversation.
His child doesn’t see him frequently. So, if the child is not old enough, they think their father left them and becomes cold to them.
16. He struggles as a single dad
On the other hand, even if the father gets the child’s custody, it changes the relationship. This is because the father has to do everything and often takes on the mother’s responsibilities.
As a single dad can’t give equal priority to both work and children – because everything is so new, he feels inadequate. Young children might even throw tantrums about wanting their mother. The entire situation becomes too much for a man.
A word from ThePleasantRelationship
Being a divorced man is challenging. This is because men aren’t emotionally expressive and often don’t get the support a divorced woman gets. It changes a man’s self-perception and often damages his social reputation.
So, if you know a male divorcee, don’t forget to help him grieve and let it all out. Don’t look down on him if he cries and lend him a shoulder instead!
Surabhi wakes up every day with a drive to craft words that can create a soulful impact. Creatively adventurous, she is always seeking to learn new skills and acquire new experiences. With a hidden soft corner for languages (especially Urdu), she writes poetry occasionally, binges on romantic shows, and LOVES to talk. A hustler, admirer, chaser, Surabhi is just another-someone who refused to give up on her dreams. She says, she is just somebody who’s trying to make herself a writer and for now, she’s just writing...