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How To Stop Being A Control Freak In A Relationship? – 20 Ways To A Healthy Dynamics

How To Stop Being A Control Freak In A Relationship? – 20 Ways To A Healthy Dynamics

Updated on Nov 15, 2023

How To Stop Being A Control Freak In A Relationship - 20 Ways To A Healthy Dynamics

Are you looking for the answer to ‘how to stop being a control freak in a relationship?’ 

If you’re constantly trying to control your partner, it is great that you even looked it up online!

It shows that you want to change for the better. You probably understand how this can affect your relationship to a great extent. 

So, if you’re ready to take on the challenge, let’s get started!

How To Stop Being A Control Freak In A Relationship? – 20 Ways

A controlling nature not only makes your partner feel suffocated in the relationship. It can also distance you from your friends and family. They may even despise you for being the way you are.

Hence, to mend things and lead a healthier life, try to change yourself with these…

1. Get to the root cause of it

Were you always so controlling and toxic? The answer is a big no. There might be some experiences during your life responsible for controlling nature.

It might be an undealt traumatic experience, depression, anxiety, PTSD, or anything triggering your controlling nature. Hence, you must get to the root cause of what made you that way to start fixing yourself.

2. Know it can affect your partner’s behavior

Your partner obviously doesn’t like being controlled in a relationship and becomes rebellious. You can’t blame them for such behavior and should know you are causing it. So, only a change in your actions can improve the situation.

3. Remember, your partner is not your slave

Your partner is your equal and not someone inferior to you. So, know that your partner is not your slave, and you should change your controlling attitude towards them.

4. Stop interfering in your partner’s choices

Your partner can make their own choices and solve their problems. You do not have to go about taking all their burden on your shoulder. When you try to do so, it is natural for your partner to feel controlled.

So, you should stop interfering in every step of their life and allow them to deal with their problems. Instead, you can always offer a little support when they need it.

5. Trust your partner’s decision 

Whenever your partner makes decisions, don’t doubt it. It’s not right to consider them weak or constantly try to change their decision. That only provokes them and causes greater issues.

Instead, learn to trust and support your partner’s decision while altering your controlling nature.

6. Put yourself in their shoe

What would you do if you were the one being controlled? Sounds disturbing, right? 

Well, your partner feels stuck in a similar situation with you dictating the course of their life. If you cannot accept such behavior from your partner, you should not show it too.

7. Let things take its course

The constant effort to make things go your way can destroy your relationship. 

Sure, you might be able to control many aspects of your life. But there are some things you cannot control, including your partner’s emotions. 

Hence, you should let such things take their course.

8. Think before you speak

An important step towards quitting your controlling nature in your relationship is to mind your language around your partner. You should not raise your voice or shout at your partner either. 

9. Stop judging for no reason 

If you judge your partner constantly regarding their lifestyle and habits, you must stop immediately. Remember that your partner wants to feel loved and accepted. So, improve your relationship by being more open-minded.

10. Respect differences of opinions

No two people are alike; the same is true for you and your partner. You’re two different individuals with different personalities and backgrounds. Hence, you should respect the differences instead of making your partner like you.

11. Allow your partner space

When you try to control your partner every time, you invade their privacy and personal space. They feel smothered in the relationship – which isn’t a comfortable feeling. So, let your partner have their own space.

12. Quit threatening your partner

If you threaten your partner to get things done your way, it will further destroy your relationship. It might badly affect their mental health and make them want to leave the relationship. So, quit your threats to improve the situation.

13. Learn the art of patience

Your partner may not be able to handle things as well as you do. But it does not mean they can’t do it altogether. 

Instead of pressuring your partner, you should have patience and be understanding towards your partner.

14. Control your paranoia

Your over-possessive nature may also result from your paranoia. Paranoia makes you go about solving every problem and overburden yourself by controlling the flow of your partner’s life. 

This needs to be stopped right away. If necessary, actively force your mind to overcome the issue.

15. Stop the hunt for perfection

Perfection is a myth, and you should accept it. Your partner need not be perfect in every way, and you definitely must not pressure them. Instead, encourage your partner’s growth and accept them with all their flaws. 

16. Learn to compromise

Compromise is the key to a strong relationship. While you are being a control freak, you are neglecting it altogether. Your partner has an equal say in your relationship, and you should respect it.

17. Get over your insecurities

Insecurities have a big contribution in making you a control freak in your relationship. 

You might have been prey to abuse in your past, making you all tough and dominant to prevent it from happening again. 

One of the important steps is to deal with your insecurities. Don’t hide behind your dictating nature.

18. Stop being manipulative

When controlling exceeds its limit, you may resort to manipulating your partner. But it will only make things worse for your relationship. 

You must work on your manipulating attitude. Just as you don’t want to be manipulated, remind yourself that manipulation is a no-go for your partner.

19. Seek a support group

Search online groups for people who are suffering from controlling nature and want to overcome it. Interact with them to understand their challenges and strategies to embrace the change. You will get better ideas to overcome your demons. 

20. Seek professional help

If nothing works out and you still can’t deal with this issue, seek professional help. Moreover, make sure you talk to your partner about it. Let them support you through the journey. Attend therapy sessions together to make the attempt a surefire success!

A word from ThePleasantRelationship

Now that you know how to bring about this positive change, don’t wait any longer. Fight your intense urge to dominate and control your partner. Practice these ways regularly without fail. 

Remember, it will be hard to get over your issues. You will fail, and you will give in to your urges more than once. But make sure you never stop trying. Your motivation alone will make you win in life!

Are you interested to know more about ‘Signs Your Partner Is Emotionally Immature’ then click here?