Wondering if you’re in a one-sided relationship? Feeling lonely even when you share the same bed as your partner and share many moments together? Don’t feel the old passion anymore?
My heart’s shattered that you had to look for this think-piece someday… but happy that you’re ready to take the next step rather than suffering.
You might decide against reading midway through this think-piece because things are good as they are.
But will denial help your circumstances? Obviously not.
Hang on a little longer, and you might receive the best solution for yourself.
Let’s get started without much delay…
One Sided Relationship Infographics
What is a one sided relationship? (One sided relationship meaning)
When you invest too much time, energy, effort, emotion, or finances in a relationship, it’s a one-sided relationship. One-sided relationships lack any meaningful connection or growth.
The term one-sided relationship describes any unbalanced relationship between two people where one person is putting in more effort, time, energy, mental, financial, or even emotional support.
However, the other person doesn’t return similar favors.
One-sided relationships exhaust you because the other party doesn’t reciprocate your feelings.
Unlike healthy relationships, one-sided ones don’t have any important connection or helpful conflicts between the two people that might strengthen the bond.
In a healthy relationship, both sides invest equally to nourish the relationship which is absent in a one-sided relationship.
Anxious if you’re in a one-sided relationship? Verify from these…
Signs of a one sided relationship
The dynamics in a one-sided relationship are always lopsided. There’s always some kind of equal investment, ignoring, and even manipulation in a one-sided relationship.
You might be in a one-sided love right now but denying it… because the truth is always bitter. However, the signs won’t lie.
Let’s quickly investigate if something’s wrong with your relationship…
1. They don’t have your back
If you’re always ready to fight for them, support them, cheer them when they’re down… but can’t expect the same from them, that’s a sign of one-sided love.
A healthy relationship requires both partners’ involvement in the relationship equally.
If they’re only around when they need something, that’s not a healthy dynamic.
2. Your relationship is your responsibility ONLY
A relationship is no child’s play because there’s a lot of work. You give and take equally to keep a healthy momentum in it.
However, if your partner doesn’t pick up any responsibilities in the relationship, they aren’t just lazy… they’re unwilling to invest to grow the relationship, which is another red flag.
3. You’re full of self-doubt
When you pick up most of the responsibilities of your relationship but nothing seems right, you’ll naturally feel insecure.
Questions like “Am I good enough for them? Because why else are they not into the relationship?” pop in your head.
Insecurities don’t stem from thin air. And your one-sided relationship is the reason behind your insecurities.
4. You make excuses for your partner
When your friends, family, or even colleagues ask “Why does your partner seem so out of it? What’s wrong?”… you justify your partner’s behavior with a random excuse.
Perhaps you say it’s work pressure, or they’re not feeling well. You say anything but the truth to people around you… or even to yourself.
You feel that they can turn into a better person, and it’ll all be fine with time. You’re more focused on the possibilities than the present.
5. This relationship doesn’t brighten your life
When you’re all alone sitting idle, you think about your relationship and see nothing good about it. It pulls out all kinds of negative emotions from within.
You feel anxious, guilty, self-hatred, and ashamed that you can’t make your relationship work. The negative feelings overpower the positive ones because your relationship is one-sided.
6. You always reach out first
Another red flag is whenever there’s a conflict and you guys don’t talk for days – whether it’s your fault or not – you always apologize first.
You can’t remember a single time when they resolved a conflict by themselves. It seems as if when you’re apart, only you hurt from a distance, and they don’t care at all.
7. You’re very mindful about their mood
The next sign of a one-sided relationship is excess wariness before beginning honest conversations.
Your partner doesn’t focus on your conversations all the time. So, you watch the moment you can begin one.
For instance, you begin conversations only when you feel loved because you know they’re paying attention at that moment.
Also, you try to sugar-coat even serious topics so that they don’t get angry and distance themselves from you.
8. You’re unaware of their thoughts
You’re always wondering what’s on their mind, how they felt about a certain incident, whether they misunderstood your intentions because they put a very low amount of effort into conversations.
Sometimes, you feel it’s better to suppress your feelings because you’re unsure if you’ll hurt them. You always guess their mood from their actions which is another warning sign.
9. Only YOU notice the relationship cracks
Whenever you talk about relationship issues, how does your partner react? Do they listen to you and try to resolve them? Then that’s a good sign.
However, if they blame you for exaggerating small insignificant issues in the relationship, that’s a warning sign.
Perhaps their words leave you feeling guilty and doubtful about the situation every time.
10. Your second opinion became first
Usually, in a balanced relationship, partners talk to each other first to resolve any conflict or relationship issues.
To ensure they’re on the right track, they might talk to friends and family for a second opinion.
However, if you discuss your relationship issues more with your friends and family than your partner, then it’s a sign of a one-sided relationship.
11. They’re uncomfortable with boundaries
You can nurture a relationship with a complete understanding of each other’s preferences and boundaries – that’s how you begin a balanced relationship.
However, if your partner is reluctant to set boundaries or throws tantrums about your boundaries, that’s not a good sign.
You might feel bad momentarily, but later you’re confused about where it went wrong. This follows up with feeling guilty too.
12. You have mismatched priorities
When it comes to relationship milestones or relationship goals, never matching is a warning sign.
Perhaps you believe in investing in the relationship, but your partner is more interested in anything outside the relationship.
You guys can never talk it out and stick to one goal. Instead, you both tend to have different priorities in your own way.
For instance, you try to spend quality time with them, but they make other engagements.
13. You want to fix them
Another warning sign is that you stay in the relationship because of their potential. You think they’re almost the perfect partner, if you pull some strings they’ll be just fine.
You’re aware this relationship is dysfunctional, but you’re still trying your best to change things. However, you can’t change a person if they don’t want them to.
And they won’t stay either if you force a change.
14. You need rose-tinted glasses before relationship discussions
Sometimes, people in one-sided relationships feel ashamed about their situation. So, they hide the reality from friends and family.
If you admit the truth of your relationship, they’ll suggest you break things off – and you subconsciously support that.
You don’t want that to turn into reality so you spill unreal things to feed their imagination of a perfect relationship.
15. You’re still in square-one
There’s an ominous stagnancy in one-sided relationships. Neither of you takes the next step in your relationship out of some fear.
Perhaps you can’t begin a conversation about a conflict because they get defensive. You think maintaining peace can help you sustain the relationship.
However, there’s no significant development in your union to call it a romantic relationship.
16. You’re the only initiator
Whether it’s a change in your relationship dynamics, major life decisions, or even planning dates… you initiate things all alone.
A relationship is a two-person game, however, you initiate nearly everything in your relationship… starting from what you’ll have in breakfast to what you want in bed.
If you pour your heart out to get nothing in return, that’s a red flag.
17. You’re the sacrificial lamb
If you compromise way more than your partner, there’s literally no equality in your relationship… and that’s an alarming sign.
Perhaps you feel like a babysitter in your relationship caring for your partner’s needs and forgetting your own.
Every day you think if you push through a bit harder, adjust more, things will be better, but it never does.
18. The communication is down
The next concerning sign is poor communication skills. Perhaps you feel communicating doesn’t help your relationship because their mind always wanders.
You spend time with them to connect with them emotionally, to bare your heart out with conversations… but they just don’t get it.
Perhaps, after communicating you feel more frustrated about the situation.
19. Bills are always on your tab
Unequal investment in the relationship is another deal-breaker. Healthy romantic relationships need equal or proportional contributions from both partners.
When either side breaks this untold rule, it’s a mess.
For instance, you spend on date nights, electricity, gas, and all other expenses for joint expenses. However, their expenses only surround themselves like clothes and luxury items.
Unhealthy dependence is a sign of one-sided love.
20. They’re controlling
Another warning sign in a romantic relationship is unequal power distribution. Perhaps, you allow your partner to live their best life, but they demand you to follow certain things.
For instance, they choose your friends, clothes, food, and even etiquette. You feel like a puppet in their hands and you allow it because you love them.
It doesn’t happen in one day but builds up slowly.
21. They ditch you for friends
Perhaps you planned a movie night at home weeks before, but your partner turns down the date for a friends’ outing.
Though you aren’t against their friends, why do they feel comfortable spending time with friends over you?
Why must they bail out from intimate moments for friends?
Maybe you’re the only one investing more time in your relationship… another red flag.
22. You’re always fighting
Suppose you want to solve some issue with communication alone, however, every time your calm conversations turn into a full-blown fight?
That’s because couples in one-sided relationships don’t have aligned goals which leads to conflicting situations. It can also result from a lack of communication or empathy from one side.
23. Their schedule is too hectic
Whenever you need time from them, they’re never available. It’s either work or other priorities in their life. Of course, your partner can’t entertain you at the drop of a hat, but sometimes they can.
If you always reschej and compromise on your schej to spend quality time with your partner, that’s concerning.
Why are you investing more time alone? A healthy relationship needs two to tango.
24. You’re over-passionate
It’s normal to express your passion and interest in your romantic partner. But do they do the same?
Perhaps you label yourself as over-passionate because you feel the lack of passion in your partner is normal.
You allow them to stay unenthusiastic about your relationship because they need space… and you can’t deny them that. However, a healthy couple involves each other in their life.
Lack of passion and enthusiasm is a warning sign.
25. You’re not exclusive
Perhaps, you don’t know what your relationship is. You live together, eat together, even share the same bed… however, they didn’t utter the magical words yet.
You want to run into their arms and greet them with a kiss with an “I love you”… but don’t know if you’re exclusive yet.
If you’re worried your confession will scare them away… that’s a red flag.
26. Your instincts are strong
If you have a strong feeling that this won’t last long, then that’s possibly true. Human instincts are mostly correct when it comes to interpersonal relationships.
Your subconscious sends signals about the fragility of your relationship, but you still hang on to your last drop of hope.
27. You didn’t picture this relationship
What is your dream relationship? Way before you began dating, you had some expectations… but soon after you began compromising.
You understood real life isn’t a fairy-tale and it’s okay to ditch some expectations. But how much is fine?
If you’re simply mentally, emotionally, physically, or even sexually dissatisfied with overall everything about your relationship, something’s wrong.
28. You lost too much already
Perhaps you know that the relationship has no future but stay back because you’re deeply invested.
You’re too tired and emotionally drained to begin a new relationship from scratch.
If you continue a relationship because of fear of singlehood, that tells a lot about your situation.
29. They flirt with others
If your partner openly flirts with others, that’s enough indication about your importance in their life. They take you for granted, like an expendable puppet.
That’s a clear sign of disrespect if you didn’t consent to such behavior. You’re all alone with your feelings for this one-sided relationship.
30. They’re selfish
Another devastating sign is when your partner isn’t around when you need them. However, they have lots of time if it’s about them.
When they need favors from you, they become an entirely different person and you see yourself in a loving relationship.
They are with you for their gains only, they don’t love you.
31. Your dreams are a secret
Well, perhaps you don’t intend to hide your dreams, they never tried to know you well either.
Or, you initiated a conversation about a huge change in your life, but they only said: “sounds nice”. You wanted a deep conversation about it, but they brushed you aside.
If your partner usually behaves like that, it’s a red flag.
32. They avoid emotional attachment
If you ever asked them to be emotionally involved in your relationship, did they say that’s for the weak? Perhaps they refuse to emotionally attach to you because of some insecurity.
If they blatantly refuse to emotionally invest in your relationship, then your feelings are truly one-sided.
33. They bypass future discussions
Whenever you talk about the future, do they lead you to the bed, or even walk out of the room?
Maybe they leave you blaming yourself for bringing up touchy topics and feeling bad about ruining quality time.
However, you’re not at fault… They only want to change the topic because of their lack of affection towards you.
34. They often suggest breakups
Whenever you have disagreements or arguments, how do they react to the situation? Perhaps they frequently say “Things aren’t working, let’s just breakup!”
When they can think of breaking up so easily, there isn’t anything in your relationship. Probably they’re long over you and looking for a chance to end the relationship.
35. You’re in denial
Perhaps you noticed the signs beforehand but still make justifications for them. Mentally justifying your partner’s behavior or actions won’t change their intentions towards this relationship.
You might fool yourself and hang on to them for longer, but in the end, their heart doesn’t belong to you.
One-sided relationships are terrible, yet why do people let them happen? To know what triggers it, read…
What causes one sided relationships?
If someone is not receiving equal efforts, love, or respect, why will they stay in a relationship? You feel your relationship is completely fine, however, that might not be the case.
People in one-sided relationships aren’t always aware that they’re in one. Why? Because they compromise for something else, are completely ignorant, or can’t help the situation.
Let’s learn them in more detail here…
1. You suffer from insecurities
When you feel unlovable or insecure about yourself, you compromise with any situation and always bear the disadvantages that come along with it.
Possibly you began this relationship without much thought because of your insecurities. Initially, you felt it’s better to be in a relationship than focussing on the dynamics.
2. You’re short on affection
Perhaps, before you began the relationship, you weren’t in your right mind because of a lack of affection and love. You didn’t know the meaning of a healthy, balanced, and loving relationship.
You settled for any relationship – to satisfy your emotional needs – that came your way because you don’t understand healthy dynamics.
However, you kick-started an emotionally unsatisfying relationship.
3. Their life is a mess
Sometimes, life circumstances jumble up your priorities and emotions. Perhaps, your partner has lots of pressure from work and can’t focus on you.
Or, their loved one is sick and they aren’t in their right mind. You can’t handle how life takes a toll on your relationship leading to mismatched expectations.
4. They grew apart
Sometimes, couples have conflicting goals which becomes a relationship hurdle.
For instance, you both grew up in X city and you plan to live there forever. However, your partner always dreamed of getting a job in B city.
Perhaps you guys settled on one goal, however, something happened in their life which made them change their thoughts.
5. You both have varying expectations
If you’re dating for months, however, you both expect different outcomes from your relationship, things will feel off.
Different expectations followed by disappointments lead to incompatibility in your relationship… it’s natural to feel they don’t love you when you have conflicting desires.
6. You lack soft skills
You’re bound to have relationship issues without good communication skills or listening skills… it might be you, them, or both.
Perhaps, you guys scream, don’t allow the other to talk, or stick to your points leading to more frustration. You guys can’t heal and feel unloved in your relationship.
7. You have attachment issues
If you have anxious attachment styles, you might feel your partner doesn’t have strong feelings towards you. Perhaps your caregiver didn’t attend to your needs and you fear people leaving your side.
Later on, in your romantic relationship, you become clingy while your partner seeks space from you. In such situations, you might become emotionally dependent on your partner.
8. It’s all intentional
Perhaps your partner intentionally refuses to give much into the relationship because they want the gains only. They exhibit passive-aggressive behavior to bail out of responsibilities.
They might also feign ignorance or incapability to leave you tending for yourself and them. For instance, they won’t handle the bills because they can’t get a job.
9. You’re codependent
Codependent people often depend on their partners’ praises to feel good about themselves.
They focus more on their partner and neglect themselves, feel guilty for refusing others, and overall obsess over what others think about them.
You think that if you always treat your partner well, they can’t live without you and hence you’ll become an inseparable portion of their life.
However, when your partner doesn’t react in obvious ways, you feel it’s one-sided love.
10. It’s their learned behavior
Perhaps your partner was brought up in a family where they all mind their own business and practice emotional avoidance.
If caregivers show detachment to children, kids grow up to think that’s the normal way to deal with relationships.
Your partner might be emotionally distant and isn’t aware that’s unnatural.
Before denying your relationship issue, and continuing life as it is, know…
What are the impacts of one sided relationships?
Sometimes, love wins over rationality and logic. You stayed with a person for so long, made the happiest memories, how can you imagine leading a life without them now?
Feel selfish for harboring such thoughts? Well, your thoughts aren’t illogical and you’ll find all the possible reasons here…
1. You feel lonely
In one-sided relationships, you feel lonely despite the presence of another person in your life.
You feel ashamed of your situation – because perhaps it’s your fault – and distance yourself from loved ones.
This leads to further estrangement from people who actually care about your wellness.
2. Stress deteriorates your health
Stress affects both physical and mental health. You might suffer from disturbed sleep patterns, headaches, body aches, depression, anxiety disorders, or even diminished immunity.
There are endless detrimental impacts of stress on the human body.
3. It takes a toll on your confidence
When your romantic relationship continuously disappoints you, you question “Am I not worth it? Am I attractive enough? Do I ask too much? Maybe I’m being a pain?”
Your confidence goes down the drain in a one-sided relationship because you give away a part of your happiness when you tend to somebody all the time and get nothing in return.
4. You have mood swings
When your relationship’s default setting is ignoring, fending for yourself, no affection or attention, you always feel sad, depressed, and insecure.
The moment your partner gives you a little attention – even if it’s for their own benefits – you’re on cloud nine. You regularly suffer from mood swings that impact your daily life severely.
5. Your productivity reaches rock bottom
Despite saying never mix professional and personal life, your personal life always tends to cross the line.
When you feel depressed, insecure, have mood swings because of your personal life, you lose motivation in your professional life.
Though some can make their profession into an anchor during such phases, most can’t. It impacts your professional performance and ruins everything you have in your life.
If your loved ones are in a one-sided relationship, you’re confused why they torture themselves. Learn their secrets here…
Why do people stay in one sided relationships?
People continue one-sided relationships because they either hope for better times or want to avoid confusion in the family structure because of elders and children in the family.
Sometimes people stay back in one-sided relationships for the sake of old times when you made worthy memories. You experienced good times once so you stay hopeful about them returning.
You believe it’s only a phase and soon will get better. People put a lot of stake on unknown possibilities in this process.
And the other reason is because you fear the void a separation will bring along. Perhaps you have children, or your parents expect you to stay committed to your partner forever.
You know you’ll hurt your family emotionally and physically if you break things off and continue to struggle in your relationship.
If you’re in a one-sided relationship, you might be curious…
Are one sided relationships worth fixing? (Can you fix a one sided relationship)
If your partner puts in the effort, processes the situation without defensiveness, and shows enthusiasm to change the situation, it’s worth fixing.
One-sided relationships are fixable owing to the few circumstances of your relationship. For instance,
How did your relationship become one-sided? Is it an overwhelming life circumstance or a relationship issue? Whether it’s a genuine one-sided relationship or you’re overthinking?
Whether your relationship dynamics changed recently or it’s been like this for a long time, have a conversation about it. Notice if they’re keen on fixing things or explaining the situation.
If it’s due to traumatic relationship experiences, professional aid can improve it.
However, if they refuse a conversation or change their ways, take it at their face value, you can’t fix it.
But what to do if you’re in a one-sided relationship? Let’s find out from…
How to deal with a one sided relationship?
To deal with a one-sided relationship, either try fixing your relationship from the core, or break up and move on.
Compromising with a one-sided relationship is not an option because it has nothing in store for you.
If you continue it, it will only inflict more emotional damage on you.
So, you have two options to deal with a one-sided relationship.
Either fix the relationship or leave the relationship and move on. However, there’s no hard-and-fast rule if you feel unsure. Also, both of them need time, so be patient.
Try fixing your relationship if you still have hope. If things look promising, that’s great. If not, then end it and move on. And depending on your decision, I’ll guide you right through.
Impatient to know how things can get back like old times? Let’s find out…
How to fix a one sided relationship?
A one-sided relationship is painful, but if your partner’s onboard to set out on a new journey to change the situation… that’s great news. Unless both sides agree on similar terms, forcing fixing measures can’t help the relationship.
Nervous about the next page of your life? To find love again, let’s hop right in…
1. Respect begins with you
If you want respect from your partner, then respect yourself. Don’t allow yourself to be their doormat. When you’re not okay with something, be straightforward.
How will anybody know your feelings if you’re not upright? Stick to your grounds when you don’t want something in your relationship.
Strengthen your heart from the beginning to fix the dynamics.
2. Recognize what’s love
How hard is loving? Getting coffee stains off your shirt? Wearing the wrong size undergarment?
You don’t force yourself or someone else to love you. Love is the most natural feeling you can feel for a person.
A person in love feels comfortable in their own skin, loves to care for themselves and their partner because both equally tackle all life issues.
Don’t jumble up a disharmonious unbalanced relationship with love or compromise with your desires.
3. Stop covering for them
Suppose, you’re in a family gathering, your loved ones are looking for your partner. You reach out to them but they reject your phone calls every time.
You justify to your parents that your S.O is busy. Don’t need to spill out your relationship dirt, but stop making excuses all the time.
While you cover for your partner’s behavior, they feel more entitled and natural to act that way. Only facing reality will help them understand the situation.
4. Make a virtual scoreboard
Though keeping scores of relationship mistakes is bad, keep scores of your favors. Make a separate journal if you think you can’t keep count. However, never play the blame game with the list.
Write down the good and bad sides of your relationship. If you suspect you overthink, then seek a trusted friend to discuss the relationship matters.
5. Hunt your weaknesses
If the one-sidedness was around for a long time, then there are certain reasons on your part. For instance,
Why did you tolerate their selfishness for so long? Why were you fine until now but can’t bear it anymore?
How did this relationship satisfy you before and not now? You might suffer from some mental health conditions yourself as you clung to such unhealthy dynamics.
6. Attend therapy
Go for individual therapy if you feel something was/is wrong with you. Otherwise, relationship coaches suggest couples therapy for your partner.
Learn why you accepted the unhealthy dynamics till now, while your partner learns useful skills to fix the dysfunctional relationship.
Build healthy communication patterns together, or even unlearn codependent traits.
7. You’re all you need
Lower your expectations from your partner to feel less disappointed in the process. Though, you can’t help expecting from your partner, remember that you’re much more capable than them.
You know what you need, so fulfill those dreams all by yourself. If your partner refuses to take you out on the weekends, treat yourself.
Tell them you’re gonna make yourself happy, so they can fend for themselves for the night.
8. Build invincible fences
To make any relationship work, set boundaries. Your partner isn’t aware of your likes and dislikes? Make a list and hand it over.
If they throw a tantrum over boundaries, tell them how important it is to continue the relationship. Despite their threats of leaving your side, stand your ground if you need healthy dynamics.
If they leave, you save yourself more hassle… but that’s not the goal.
9. Talk, a lot
Communicate whenever things seem unsteady. Think something is unfair? Let them know that you don’t like it. However, don’t spit out words at them and expect them to understand.
Sit down with a clear mind and share what’s on your mind, respectfully. Also, you both must actively listen to each other and not draw conclusions from a few words.
10. Drown in self-love
Your definition of self-love is different from mine or your friend’s. This is about doing whatever you love.
Passionate about art? Get some colors, brushes, and canvas.
Like jogging? Wake up early to kick into your jogging shoes.
Want to write? Indulge in journaling.
Do whatever that gets your heart… be happy in your own way. Your partner needn’t be the only reason for your happiness.
If things still don’t seem too bright, break up. So, learn the process to calmly end everything here…
How to end a one sided relationship?
Ending a relationship doesn’t involve the best feelings… in fact, it’s even harder if they didn’t find anything wrong with the lopsided relationship dynamics.
They might blame you for the breakup, but know that you’re more precious than their false belief of normalcy.
Also, they might manipulate you against the breakup if they have lots to lose.
Follow through each step over here with utmost confidence to break free…
1. Create a time frame
You can’t set a rigid deadline when it comes to heart matters. However, there must be an end to your tolerance. You can’t give away your time, energy, and affection without receiving anything.
So pick an average time until your relationship might get back on track. If you’re consulting a mental health expert, talk about how long it usually takes to make your time frame.
2. Stick to dual recovery
While your partner replaces unhealthy dynamics with healthy ones, you might be coping with the impacts of your one-sided relationship and unreturned feelings.
Before you decide to completely break things off, heal your heart the most to make the best decisions for your life.
Process your feelings well before you begin the breakup conversation.
3. Don’t hide the issues
While breaking up, don’t hide any facts. Explain what you expected from the relationship and where you are currently. Explain what you wanted in the relationship and didn’t receive.
If you need equal distribution of power or responsibility and that didn’t happen, admit it. Give proper closure to end things.
4. Use respectful words
During the breakup conversation, you’ll feel emotional, want to hurt them, but don’t. Don’t emphasize what they weren’t capable of giving in the relationship.
Cursing or blaming will give you momentary relief, it won’t help you heal through your situations. Make it all about you, and leave feeling generous.
5. Forgive to minimize the damage
Tell them that the separation is for the best for both parties, that you don’t hold any grudge over them for whatever happened.
At some point, you did love your partner, thought you’ll grow in the same manner, but it didn’t happen. Respect the old times, and soothe the blow before breaking things.
Also, holding grudges won’t help the situation.
Since, the breakup is a greater toll on you because of greater investment in the relationship, forgive them for disappointing you, and yourself for allowing such incidents.
Read on to the next portion if you’re pondering over a breakup but aren’t sure…
When to end your one sided relationship?
If it’s a long-term relationship, you might be unsure about “when it’s time to end.” People usually invest more than a healthy duration due to their weakness towards the relationship.
However, that hurts you mentally and leaves you disappointed in the end. So, pick onto these clear signs about irreparable situations…
1. You emotionally burn out
At some point, you’ll reach your limit, feel guilty, anxious, ashamed, and angry for allowing your partner in your life. Clinical psychology states that these feelings lead to emotional burnouts.
There’s no point in dragging on the relationship that brings no joy in your life… despite trying everything in your capabilities.
2. They aren’t up for negotiations
If they blatantly refuse to change the relationship dynamics when you talk about boundaries, therapy, or even during a calm conversation, know there’s nothing left.
They distanced themselves from you long before, and you realized it late. They won’t make any efforts for your relationship, it’s already broken.
3. There’s no change
Despite undergoing therapy and taking all possible remedies, if it still doesn’t work out, you can give it more time.
However, follow your time frame… Perhaps your compatibility quotient really went down if fixing it takes too much time, energy, and effort.
Despite initiating the breakup yourself, it’s still a loss. So, learn to cope up with…
How to move on from a one sided relationship?
Some might say “You wanted the breakup yourself, your partner didn’t… so what’s there to heal for you?”
Well, a lot more than they can imagine. You’re heartbroken, disappointed, guilty, ashamed… more than a hundred negative emotions are smothering you at the moment.
You need healing, despite what others say… so, let’s learn how to heal here…
1. Combat the guilt
Moving on from a one-sided relationship is no different from a regular one. However, you’ll feel guilty for unknown reasons and blame yourself for destroying what you had… and that’s normal.
Remind yourself repeatedly, that your mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual health is far more important than a burdensome relationship. You can’t destroy an already-broken relationship.
2. Learn basic skills
Whenever you drown in self-blame and guilt, distract yourself with some useful skills. Perhaps, fix your communication skills, or attachment styles.
Resume therapy if you feel that you have other unresolved mental issues.
3. Confide in a journal
Keep a journal where you pour out all the heavy emotions. Write down whatever comes to your mind. If you want to curse your ex-partner, write it down.
If you regret not doing something for your relationship, put it on paper. The paper might not console you, but it can soak in some of your sadness.
4. Learn healthy relationship dynamics
Some people get attracted to similar relationships and create a pattern of one-sided relationships. Before beginning a new one, learn how healthy relationships work.
Know that you don’t always balance out each other’s efforts, but you feel comfortable despite any momentary imbalance.
5. Reach out to loved ones
Isolated yourself to cover for your dysfunctional relationship? Not anymore, time to reconnect with the lost loved ones.
Spend more time with them now, plan vacations with friends and family. Go bar hopping to drown your sorrows together.
You possibly missed out a lot about their life. Exchange your ears and shoulders for each other.
A word from ThePleasantRelationship
Whether you want to sustain the relationship or end things, it’s your life so decide for yourself. Don’t let your parents’, children’s or the world’s thoughts bother you when it comes to yourself.
After all, at the end of the day, you’ll live on with it. Find out how much happiness you have left in your relationship.
Know how much your partner cares about this relationship and if it’s genuine.
If you plan to revive the extinguished flames of your relationship, know that it takes time. It’s not a miracle, you gotta hold tight to your seat.
However, if you plan to end things, healing needs time too. Self-hatred is the easiest escape when things don’t seem right. So, whenever you lose hope, reach out to a therapist.
Surabhi wakes up every day with a drive to craft words that can create a soulful impact. Creatively adventurous, she is always seeking to learn new skills and acquire new experiences. With a hidden soft corner for languages (especially Urdu), she writes poetry occasionally, binges on romantic shows, and LOVES to talk. A hustler, admirer, chaser, Surabhi is just another-someone who refused to give up on her dreams. She says, she is just somebody who’s trying to make herself a writer and for now, she’s just writing...