If “how to stop obsessing over someone” is still a question that has been troubling you, then you cannot find a better answer!
This article is all about recognizing signs that you’re obsessing over someone, finding the root cause, and dealing with the obsession.
Obsession is triggered when you totally pour yourself into someone and expect the same from them.
You feel like you have a right on their time, their relationships, and their life in general. Your mind is occupied with your thoughts 24 x 7.
That’s called obsession.
But with obsession comes compulsiveness. You start compelling the person to spend more time with you, to love you back, to fulfill your expectations, and so on.
Now that’s obviously gonna annoy them if they don’t feel the same for you.
Don’t worry, you won’t deal with it alone. I’m here to help you with this. All you have to do is stay with me till the very end! We’ll fix this together… So, let’s start.
10 Signs you’re obsessing on someone
When you start obsessing over someone, it adversely affects your mental health condition. It is pretty common if you think you’re losing control over your emotional equilibrium.
When you realize you’ve been obsessing over someone, try to calm down and strike a balance. Do not let the emotional turmoil control you.
But how do you know that what you are feeling is obsession? These signs listed below help you know if you are in love, or it’s just another obsession.
Read on to find out what these signs are.
1. You’re fantasizing about them
You’ve isolated yourself from the world while dreaming about them. The person doesn’t even know that you exist, but you have already decided your kids’ name. Isn’t it sad?
You don’t realize love has to be a mutual feeling. Otherwise, it’s just another tragic one-sided romance. Your goals seem even more far-fetched than before, but that doesn’t seem to affect you anymore.
2. You are extremely possessive!
The thought of a third person entering your love life doesn’t go well with you. Not even in the worst nightmares would you want to imagine your beloved with someone else.
The point is: you don’t have the authority to direct someone else’s life. They’re free to fall for whoever they wish for, whenever they wish for.
Just open your eyes and ask yourself, have they ever even looked at you?
3. Their opinions = your opinions
You do not have an opinion about anything anymore, you just blindly rely and trust whatever they say. Their interests are the same as yours.
For instance, you have never been into clubbing, nor do you want to be, but now that you know they love going to clubs, and all of a sudden, club parties are your favorite.
Black has never been your favorite color, but you like it, because you saw them wearing black the whole week.
You’ve lost your individuality just so they could see that you have common interests. But how long can you pretend? Why can’t you let them know and love the real you?
4. You feel protective
Do you know the difference between being protective and being compulsive?
Maybe in the name of protection, by not letting them do what they want to, you are just being manipulative. You don’t want them to associate with anyone else except you.
Sweetheart, you are not worried about their safety, you are just being selfish because behind every action of yours, you have a selfish motive.
5. You are jealous
Obsession kills your ability to be rational. You will always be jealous and that will stop you from being logical.
You don’t want them to mix with other people, not specifically any person of the opposite gender. You dislike every person they meet with.
For example, you guys are walking down the street, and suddenly one of their friends shows up… and when you see them smile and giggle in the conversation with their friend, it makes you jealous.
You silently wish to just drag them away from there. You won’t even care what that person would think of you. Or whether the conversation was important.
6. You can’t accept rejection
You love this person and have conveyed your feelings to them. But sadly, they’ve very politely denied the proposal, because they don’t see you as their partner.
Instead of accepting the fact, you end up making every intensive effort to make that person change their decision. But in the process, you often end up hurting them or yourself.
You just can’t come to terms with the fact that they don’t want you. You ask them if you are not enough.
You are ready to make any changes they might suggest, without as much as a single thought. That’s when you should know that you are becoming obsessive!
7. You reach out to them, always
Even when they have made it quite clear that they don’t want to talk to you, you continue to make efforts to talk to them. You continuously text them, drunk-call them and send them pictures.
Has it ever been the other way round? No, not even once! It’s always you irritating them to an extent, where they just block you. And even after that, you try to make contact with different numbers.
You make fake accounts to keep a track on their social media accounts. Aren’t you getting creepy stalker vibes? Yes, you are turning into one.
8. You can’t see anyone else
For this one specific person, you have compromised your loved ones and your career. You’ve put everything below them on your priority list.
What needed most of your focus and determination has been neglected throughout.
You gave up everything for this person, your interests, joy, inner peace and most importantly your people and work.
Those who always stayed by your side, you walked away from them for this person. Thus, your story would end up with you being lonely.
You couldn’t accept love from the ones who gave it to you, and yours too didn’t get accepted by the one you loved.
9. Too many calls or text messages
If your text messages are insanely long in comparison to theirs, then you need to take note of this point.
Their replies are crisp and to the point, but your texts are crazy lengthy. You narrate stories in your messages. To top this, you call them repeatedly.
So, what if they are not answering your call, you keep calling them until and unless they pick up and answer. All these are signs of obsessive love disorder.
10. You start stalking them
Stalking is just another tell-tale sign of obsession. All thanks to social media, this stalking business has gotten much easier.
You follow them everywhere, to their workplace, while jogging or even to cafes. You just want a romantic story to brew between the two of you. Isn’t it?
Well, that isn’t happening, not if you keep on following them, because they are definitely running in the other direction!
How many signs do you think you possess? Don’t take it lightly, my friend. If you found almost all the signs matching your behavior, then you should take this as a serious warning. It is an obsessive personality disorder.
On the other hand, if you found only a few signs to be in line with your behavior, then that’s a borderline risk of becoming obsessive.
In both cases, just know that you can fix this. We’ll do this together, just as I promised…
But to deal with this, we need to get into the reasons that are the root cause of the problem.
10 Reasons why we obsess over someone
When you tell yourself that you need to stop obsessing over someone, the first step would be to know the exact reason for your obsession.
Your obsession can be a result of any of the various factors given below. But, being able to pinpoint the reason already brings you halfway closer to solving the problem.
Here are 10 reasons to know why you might be obsessing over someone.
1. Attachment disorders
Often the root cause of your obsession lies in the previous pages of your experience. You might not have had a great childhood and that resulted in you growing into an adult who craves attachments.
Your parents or your guardian did not give you the love, care, and support that a child needs to grow.
Now, you long for that love and care. But at the same time, you are also afraid to lose someone who provides you this. It can also make you controlling and manipulative.
2. Past Trauma
Your obsession might have something to do with the fact that you might have lost someone in the past.
Someone who you loved with all your heart. And, now that fear remains in your heart and you do not want to lose this particular person.
Our past holds immense power to affect our present. This is why certain situations or traits in a person that are similar to some of your past experiences might make you obsess over that person.
In some cases, you tend to accept the flaws of your partner and co-operate in an abusive relationship.
3. Delusional disorder
A delusional disorder can also be the flame that ignites your obsession.
Erotomania is the name of one such mental disorder where you tend to get obsessed over a person who doesn’t love you back.
For instance, you are in love with a pop singer, and you are literally obsessed with them but on the other hand, they do not even have the slightest idea that you exist.
Your worlds are poles apart. Your behavior and actions justify the idea of Erotomania.
4. Borderline Personality Disorder
Another reason for obsessive behavior is Borderline Personality Disorder. Here, the person fails to acknowledge the reality. Basically, they are living in a dream.
They do not value themselves enough to know what they are capable of and what qualities they possess as an individual. They see themselves from others’ eyes and lack a sense of individuality.
5. Fear of abandonment
A vital reason behind your obsession with someone can be that you are terrified of them leaving you. This can stem from your past trauma too.
Lack of long-term companions in life can also aggravate the fear of abandonment. Many people are scared of being left by someone they love with all their heart.
Which is why they tend to hold on to that person like glue.
6. Inferiority complex
Inferiority complex is a state of mind where a person feels inferior to the people around him/her. This feeling promotes obsessive behavior in an individual.
Such a person thinks that everyone out there is better than them in one way or another. There is always a constant urge of saving the special person in your life, by putting your best version forward.
You tend to observe them and eventually get obsessed with them so that you can portray your best image in front of them.
Depression or other mental disorders can make a person obsess over someone easily.
When a person goes through depression, they find themselves unworthy of love. They do not feel like interacting with other people.
There is a lack of human connection in most cases. So, when a person behaves pleasantly with someone who possesses mental illness, the victim tends to get obsessed with them.
The kindness-filled gestures seem rare to them and this is why the person might not want to let them go.
8. Wrong perception of the relationship
Some people put their relationship on a pedestal. They overhype their relationship more than it deserves.
This may be because of their preconceived notions about what a relationship should look like. Or their desire to make the relationship something it is not.
Such actions can lead a person to obsess over their partner. It is common to romanticize your relationship.
However, one shouldn’t lose touch with reality and provide their partner with adequate personal space as well.
9. Lack of self-love
Obsessing over someone can also stem from a lack of self-love in a person. When someone doesn’t love themselves enough, they tend to find themselves unworthy of love.
And, so they settle for something that might be even lesser than the bare minimum.
Such acts can lead to a person obsessing over someone. This is because they might feel scared about finding someone who would love them like this again. So, they try to hold tight onto what they already have.
10. A need for constant attention
If you are someone who has been constantly pampered by your friends and family, you might find it hard to endure a relationship without constant affection. Such people are habituated to receiving love.
This instinct might act up during their relationship with other people.
They might get obsessed with someone because of their desire for constant love and affection.
This obsession can also stem from the sudden arrival of different types of emotions. Like, finding a pampering partner after already being spoiled by your family and friends.
Having read the causes, we must focus on the main question now: How do you get over this obsession? Don’t worry, I’ve got you covered.
There are many ways to do it, like self-introspection, breathing exercises, keeping yourself busy, and being productive.
These things have to be done on a regular basis. Only then would you be able to overcome this obsession of yours.
So, let’s not waste another moment to see how to stop obsessing over someone!
How to stop obsessing over someone? – 30 Ways
It’s simply no use obsessing over someone. Either a person loves you, or they don’t. You don’t want to annoy your beloved with your obsessive actions. What if they get sick of you, and get interested somewhere else? Maybe in their ex…
It’s a wise decision you’ve made here, of putting a stop to your obsessing behavior. But the question is… Is it possible? Can we switch to being non-obsessive? Well, nothing works overnight.
Of course, you will stop being obsessed over someone once you go through these super easy 30 steps. But that will require some decent amount of determination and consistency. That’s it!
So, let’s quickly begin with the steps.
1. Begin with Self-introspection
Do you deserve a partner who doesn’t love you as much as you love them? I don’t think so. Don’t you want someone who feels the same way about you. Of course, you do!
You don’t deserve this one-sided love story. You don’t have to feel low and inferior all the time. It’s time to rise up. In the process of chasing your love interest who is running away from you, you may lose yourself.
Who knows if there is someone waiting to shower all their love onto you forever? You are truly special, and you deserve your own happy fairy-tale!
2. Understand: Obsessing Is Abnormal
First and the foremost thing to do here is to accept that you are truly obsessed with someone, and that’s abnormal. Acceptance will save you from future troubles.
You have to acknowledge this as early as possible. Remember how it’s said when you recognize a disease at its initial stage. That way, the treatment can be decided upon and also be cured.
Plus, you have ample time in hand for the treatment. I’m not asking you to start panicking about it. Just know that having an obsessive personality is a disorder, and you need to cure it.
3. But also understand it Is natural…
Now, obsessing is abnormal. But it’s not unnatural. It happens. We all get obsessed with someone or something in our life. You’re not the first person to be obsessed, neither are you going to be the last!
It is very natural if you think you fall under this category. There’s nothing to be ashamed of, or feeling guilty about. Don’t start this treatment journey on a negative note.
As I said, we’ll fix this, okay? It’s gonna be 100% fine. So, start your journey with a positive affirmation and mindset.
4. Do not let obsessiveness take a revengeful route
A very important part of fighting obsessiveness is to save yourself from revengeful thoughts.
If you are getting revengeful thoughts about your object of love, know that your obsessiveness has taken a dangerous turn.
You need to take control of your actions as fast as possible. Because once you fall into this ditch, it will be very difficult to come out of it.
When you become obsessed with a person, their rejection can easily turn your feelings of love into feelings of anger or revenge.
You might think of harmful ways to take revenge from the person. You cannot get a surer proof that this was not love but only obsession.
Don’t hate the person just because they rejected you. These negative thoughts will not let you overcome this obsessive behavior.
5. Identify the Root Cause
Find out the core of this issue. Like why can’t you get over this person? Why is this person making you someone who you’re not in reality?
Do you think the dreams and fantasies made you like this, or is it just an urge to love someone and get love in return?
Answering these questions will guide you to the root cause of the issue.
You are in a situation where you feel attached to someone very easily. You have to find out the cause of why you are going out of your way to be with someone, who doesn’t want you back. Are you so desperate?
Come on, seek answers to these questions!
6. Keep a track of your trigger points
It’s good to notice and keep track of your trigger points.
For example, observe the situation which makes you feel obsessed. Also see how you feel at that time, whether you are angry, frustrated, annoyed, sad or secluded.
Whenever you get triggered by these feelings, try to divert your mind. Give your best to pull yourself out of the situation.
Gradually, you’ll develop skills to keep yourself at ease, even if such triggers try to continue to bother you.
7. Fight the Temptation
Close the doors that lead you to the world of temptation. Like if you think this person is the reason for your obsession, then delete that person from your thoughts.
Remember such temptation is nothing but a devil. You need to fight it! Stop feeding your obsessive nature.
I know it’s very tempting to walk to your office from the very route that they take, just so that they can notice you.
But if you don’t fight now, then you will be the one to suffer.
It’s difficult to get over a person all of a sudden. It takes time and lots and lots of consistent effort. But if you really want to do it, I’m sure you will be able to!
8. Love them, don’t live on them
The thought of losing someone is one of the most common root causes of obsession.
You are madly in love with this person. Fortunately, they reciprocate the same feelings. It starts to affect you mentally, and you are afraid of losing them.
Often this condition leads to possessive behavior, where you end up losing your beloved forever.
After losing them, you feel lost. You don’t know where to go, or what to do. You want that person back because you were obsessed with them. It’s like: your life depends on them.
This is terrible, my friend. You have to be your own support system, buddy.
It’s a cycle of getting obsessed with someone else that makes you weak, dependent and hopeless. Don’t worry, you’re not alone. The very next step is going to fix this!
9. Look for a Permanent Source of Happiness
Now, there are a couple of things that I want to tell you. You will never find happiness if you search for it outside. External sources of happiness are temporary. Permanent Happiness comes from within.
You can be the only internal and permanent source of your happiness. Instead of looking for someone else who loves you truly, or keeps you company throughout the thread of life, you should start living on your own…
Enjoy your own company, love yourself, and be self-dependent. God has created us as complete individuals. You don’t need anyone else to complete you.
10. Stay away from the digital bin!
Try to lead your own life. A disciplined life saves you from going off track. For instance, if you think you are too much on the phone, stop it right away.
Staying on the phone longer than required, or talking too much to your love interest is not going to turn things in your favor. Rather, it’s going to spoil you and trap you in the obsessive cycle.
I know it’s easiest to communicate with your beloved when you have so many forms of communication available. But that does not mean you are going to waste all your time in the digital bin.
If you keep talking to them, what magic do you think can take away your obsessiveness? If you want to stop obsessing over someone, stop communicating with them unnecessarily.
11. Speak to your friends and family
Surround yourself with people who love you unconditionally, like your family and friends. Only your loved ones can help you heal over your obsession. Talk about how you feel.
This acts as a good distraction for your mind that constantly used to think about them. They weren’t the last people on Earth. You have genuine people around you, who love you for who you are. Isn’t that more than enough?
Lighten the burden off your heart, in front of them. We often lose our sense to differentiate between what is right and what is wrong.
These people will help you walk through the darkness. They will hold the light of guidance. That’s the reason we call them well-wishers. Right?
12. Own a Diary
You can also pour your heart out in a diary. That way you wouldn’t need any person to lend you shoulders. You will be able to understand yourself through the pages you fill.
Again, a very good way of distracting you from the obsessive thoughts and feelings. The best way to vent out, without the fear of being judged by anyone.
So, it’s just about getting the burden off your heart, the medium can be a person or paper, choice is yours.
13. Look into the future
Imagine you are in the future, and when you retrospect this past self of yours, it is surely embarrassing.
You would think, “Was I this crazy that I wasted so much time of my life running behind and obsessing over a person. Was it really worth it?”
It will also make you feel good about how far you’ve come. You have worked on yourself and made yourself much stronger.
The past will surely make you feel embarrassed but it will also make you laugh out loud.
14. Take this as a Challenge Now…
Take it as a challenge buddy! Challenge yourself… say this loudly: I am not obsessed with anything or anyone in this world.
At every stage of challenge, reward yourself when you pass. For example, challenge yourself that you will not call or stalk that particular person you’re obsessed with for a month.
Now, watch how you perform in the given challenge.
Be your own biggest motivator. Don’t let anyone else take over your peace. Work on yourself and see how better you become with each passing day.
15. They can’t be your only priority
You feel that you cannot separate yourself from this “someone”. This person is consuming you from within 24 x 7. Even while you are reading this article, you are still thinking of that person.
The problem isn’t that you think about them, it’s common when you are in love. The problem starts when you make this person your only priority. It just makes your existence pointless.
Your beloved can be one of your top priorities, but they can’t be your only priority. Understand the difference here.
16. Don’t stalk them
No matter how much I tell you to use social media smartly, I know you are not going to do so.
After reading this article, please make a vow that if you are using your internet, you will use it only to watch movies and indulge in good sources of entertainment.
Don’t use Instagram, WhatsApp, Facebook and other communicative applications, where you have any scope of stalking the object of your obsession.
Don’t stalk them, and for god’s sake, don’t upload tragic heartbroken stories. This nonsense is not going to take you anywhere.
Remember our goal is to come out of the obsessive zone, and not get trapped into it forever. To gain something, you have to learn control. Limit the screen time and use it only when necessary.
17. Practice Control over your thoughts
Thinking is an ability that helps you distinguish between right and wrong. You can easily monitor your thoughts and perception if you want to do so.
Take charge of what thoughts should enter your mind, what thoughts should remain in your brain, and what thoughts must be stopped right at the entrance.
Human brain has the ability to process their thoughts and feelings. Sometimes your mind processes a particular thought excessively. That’s called overthinking.
Do you know you can actually stop yourself from overthinking? Just sit down, relax and give yourself some time. Practice mindfulness.
18. Create some distance
Giving personal space to your partner as well as yourself solves most of the problems in a relationship. It is very important to respect someone’s personal space.
Create a wall between you two, never allow yourself to even look at what’s behind the wall and don’t dare try to break down the wall.
If they seem to be agitated with your presence, then have some self-respect buddy. Don’t take a path that leads to them.
If you are supposed to be at the same place, ignore them completely. Do not initiate conversation , give them a chance to do so. It will take time but eventually you will get hold of yourself.
19. Focus on the entire relationship
Get a fuller view of the relationship. Where is this heading? How far are both of your expectations being fulfilled?
If you know that they don’t want to share a romantic relationship with you, then keep repeating the fact to yourself, until and unless your brain is able to process and accept it.
On the other hand, if they want to be with you, then focus on making this a healthy relationship instead of an obsessed one.
Instead of focusing only on your expectations, focus on taking healthier steps to make this entire relationship a beautiful journey.
20. Stop idealizing him/her
Is this person really perfect? Have you ever tried to take note of their imperfections or flaws? If not, then do it right now.
If you truly love them then you will accept them for who they are. Ignoring the imperfections shows that you are only obsessed with their qualities.
Maybe you imagined them to be someone who they are actually not. They are not as special and flawless as you consider them to be. So why do you need to put them in such an elevated position?
That makes you go blind with obsession. They just tend to bluff and you obviously fall for it.
Are they really worth the obsession? In a relationship, both the partners have to invest equal efforts. And if they share an equal position with you, then there is no need of being scared of losing them. If it’s your loss, then it is their loss too.
21. Create a super-tight schedule
Come on, it’s time to utilize your time. Do you think you are productive enough? If not, then this is the time to make things work.
When you want to stop obsessing over someone, there’s nothing like making a new routine for yourself.
Look around if you are neglecting some important responsibilities. Focus at work.
After all, you always want to hear the motivating compliments of your boss… plus who knows if you can manage to get a promotion by the end of this month?
22. Meet new people
When you are planning to distract yourself from the object of obsession, then you are definitely going to feel lonely.
You will crave for that person. But you can tackle all this smartly. Go out, meet new people, make new relationships and spend time with new friends.
You will see that all of a sudden life has become so exciting and thrilling. But that does not mean you become obsessed with these new friends. Don’t repeat the same mistake.
Life offers endless opportunities to you. It depends on you whether you’re good at making them work for you or not.
23. Addiction is a big No
Trust me, this time is going to be very difficult as well. You are going to feel tempted towards drugs, alcohol, and every nasty thing that addicts a person.
Junk food cravings would give you a hard time. But try and understand that this is a trap to a dangerous cycle, worse than death.
The moment you stop the intake of these toxins, you are going to crave for the person even more.
Moreover, you can drunk-dial, stalk them on social media, and do all kinds of nonsense that you are trying so hard not to do!
24. Understand their point of view
When you love someone truly it is natural for you to go off limits and beyond your comfort zone, to show love.
But it totally depends on how the other person feels. Whether they appreciate your efforts or not, if they find you creepy or romantic.
It is here that you need to understand their feelings. Do they really appreciate your obsessiveness or are they afraid of your behavior?
Are you looking too desperate or needy in their eyes? I don’t think that makes you a better lover.
When you are already putting in so much effort in the relationship, why not invest in the right way, know their perspective and take your steps accordingly.
Once they understand your love, they won’t feel awkward with your behavior.
25. Focus on personal growth
You cannot even imagine the number of people who are dealing with such obsessive feelings.
Should that stop you from living your life? You have a life of your own. Why not take this time and improve the quality of your living!
Eat right, complete your sleep cycle, meditate, and exercise. Get into a proper routine, so that you are fit physically as well as mentally.
You start feeling better as an individual, and it will help you become self-sufficient. And you will eventually become a better person, who is loved by all.
That is gonna be the happiest dawn of realization, my friend!
26. Don’t let them judge you
Hey pal, you very well know that people are going to judge you. No matter what you do, people will always have something to say.
When you love someone deeply or when you are obsessed with them, you get affected by their words. Their thoughts trigger you; their opinions make a change in your life.
But not everybody should affect you with their opinion. Some people intentionally try to hurt you, that shouldn’t change your way of living.
Don’t end up being a victim of these judgments. I know these judgments are super sensitive, but if you react to them, you are going to be a bigger fool. It’s best if you can listen to them and forget!
27. Practice self-affirmation!
The mantras of self-affirmation work wonders!
They make a strong emotional base to shape your behavior. Feeding your brain with positive affirmations automatically directs your actions positively.
Make sure you tell yourself: I am perfect! I am happy. I am self-sufficient. I don’t need an external source of happiness. I don’t depend on others for my pleasure.
I know you don’t believe me but just try it out for yourself. Chant these sentences to yourself before going to bed, and every morning you’ll witness a big difference over time.
28. What’s your hobby?
Has the situation made you so sad that you don’t even enjoy your hobby anymore? When was the last time that you spent more than half an hour with your hobby?
Make sure you’re spending as much time with your hobby as possible.
In fact, indulging in your hobby is the best way to distract yourself from these useless affairs. You get to spend time with yourself. Most importantly this gives you happiness, and that’s all you need to get over the sorrow!
29. Go on a trip!
This is one of the best ways to heal yourself when you are going through such a difficult period in your life.
When you are on your way to detach yourself from someone you are so obsessed with, there’s nothing like a vacation! Trust me, you’ll feel good.
When you are on a vacation you meet new people and take charge of yourself. It develops a sense of independence within you.
You learn to live by yourself and find a different type of happiness by visiting new places. This makes it all the more easier for you to fight obsessiveness.
30. Talk to a professional
As a human, you deal with different aspects of your life. Whenever one of the aspects gets complicated to tackle, you can always seek professional help.
You just need a moment of courage to step out and face your problems.
A health professional will listen to your problems, understand your opinion without judgment, and help you overcome them.
That way you can lead a healthy life with friends and family. You can divert your focus into working upon yourself. You no longer will need some outer source to provide you with peace and happiness.
A word from ThePleasantRelationship
As said earlier, nothing works overnight. Some days, you’ll find yourself too good with the process. Somedays, you’ll drop.
Everything you’ve been doing would seem like a futile effort. Probably, you may end up drunk-dialing them. But don’t let these setbacks discourage you.
Never give up. That’s the worst thing you’ll ever do to yourself. Keep moving, these things are sensitive to deal with, but you’ll eventually rise above the situation.
And always remember: where there’s a will, there is a way!
Surabhi wakes up every day with a drive to craft words that can create a soulful impact. Creatively adventurous, she is always seeking to learn new skills and acquire new experiences. With a hidden soft corner for languages (especially Urdu), she writes poetry occasionally, binges on romantic shows, and LOVES to talk. A hustler, admirer, chaser, Surabhi is just another-someone who refused to give up on her dreams. She says, she is just somebody who’s trying to make herself a writer and for now, she’s just writing...