So, you are looking for the answer to: How to be happy alone?
Before answering your question – here’s my question to you…
Are you alone or do you feel lonely?
Yes, the two aren’t the same at all. Many assume that people without a crowd are lonely but that’s not the case. In Fact many times, people with no one else to support them are perfectly satisfied with their life…
Wondering how they do it? Well, you reached the best possible station for that. This think-piece will take you on a unique ride that will eventually lead you to happy-land… all on your own. Because you are all you have in the end.
But before that… let’s first understand…
Alone vs. lonely
Let me tell you a fact: Staying alone does not imply loneliness. Alone and lonely are quite different in various aspects.
Feelings of loneliness do not always mean you are alone and vice versa. So here are a few points to help you identify the difference…
|You choose to be alone.
|You didn’t choose it. It’s a result of your circumstances.
|It accompanies a feeling of calmness and contentment.
|It accompanies a feeling of abandonment and emptiness.
|You still feel a connection with the world.
|You feel disconnected and isolated.
|You tend to engage with yourself positively.
|You yearn for a companion.
|You indulge in your thoughts.
|Your thoughts wander and fluctuate from one thing to another.
|It gives you a break from the world to engage with yourself.
|It consumes you from within.
So being alone carries a positive air, whereas loneliness is a negative feeling. Alone simply implies you may not be around people but you’re not anti-social.
On the other hand, loneliness strikes when you are around a million people, including people close to you, and still feel disconnected.
Remember, here we aim at finding solace in being alone, which is far from being lonely.
Think you’re alone but not lonely? Wanna find your way to quick happiness? Let’s check from here…
20 Short Term Tips on How to Be Happy Alone
Every achiever is once a beginner. So, before you master the art of being happy alone, you have to start with baby steps.
Here are some short-term tips on how to be happy alone to help you build a strong base.
1. Never compare yourself with others
People around you are immersed in happiness with their large social life. You wonder if you can ever happily lead such a life. However, if you can’t, that must not disturb you.
Everyone is unique in their own way. So, stop comparing yourself with others and their social life. They may roar with laughter publicly… but you never know if they’re actually happy with their so-called friends.
So even if it’s the norm to have millions of friends, it’s your choice to stay alone and focus on yourself.
2. Limit using social media
Though not always, people on social media show you an All-good world. The stories and posts with happy faces and group trips aren’t always real.
Remember why people say cheese before taking a photograph.
To kickstart your alone journey, limit social media consumption. You might feel disheartened and left-back scrolling through those show-offs. Or, feel you are not one of them.
But that mustn’t keep you from choosing to be alone. So, why not deactivate your social media handles for a day or two and feel the peace?
3. Ditch your phone for yourself
Today, the world entirely depends on smartphones. You don’t have to meet someone to know what’s up in their life. This might again distract you from your goal and lead to anxiety and depression.
That notification beeps for the millionth time and unnecessary calls… everything puts you on the spot. You check on people and hardly think about yourself.
So, to have some ‘me’ time, turn off your phone and keep it out of your reach. During this time, unnecessary notifications won’t make your thoughts wander.
Think of alternatives to spend your time alone without your cell phone.
4. Let your mind wander
To truly know and understand yourself, find out how your mind wanders. Where do your thoughts take you when you are alone?
That is where you find your key to being happy alone.
Take a short break doing nothing and set yourself free from everything… be it music, television, books, internet, podcasts, etc.
Your thoughts while doing these may not be real. It might be a manipulated version of what you’re consuming at the time.
So, in the break time, sit or lie down in a silent place, close your eyes, and feel the darkness. You’ll know where your thoughts really belong.
5. Go out on a self-date
Don’t dates excite you and make you happy? Then why not try it with yourself? Sounds weird? Well, people may judge you, but does it matter?
Even if people think you are odd, never care. Remember we want to be happy alone, not with others.
Go on a self-date to make yourself feel special and happy. You don’t need an expensive date to the point of bankruptcy… else you might hate solo dates.
Treat yourself with goodness, love, and care. It can even be a cup of coffee in your favorite coffee shop.
6. Move your body and break a sweat
Physical activities are great mood boosters and it is scientifically proven.
Exercise fills you with strength and releases endorphins, the feel-good neurotransmitter in your brain to make you feel happy.
Take baby steps if you are new to exercise. Begin with a few minutes of stretching.
Eventually, you’ll gain confidence to hit the gym or try intense physical activities… like weight training, aerobics, and sports.
In this way, also spend time alone and do something beneficial for yourself.
7. Spend time in nature’s lap
Nature is a great healer and a vast reservoir of goodness. It has millions of ways to make you feel happy alone.
Remember the peace you feel while watching a red sunrise with redness? The moon changing phases every night, or the fragrance of those marigold blossoms?
You often ignore nature when you’re busy around people. But spending ‘me’ time with nature as a companion is always a great idea. Even a 30 minutes-walk on your terrace or garden brings you peace.
8. Learn about the advantages of being alone
Staying happy alone is difficult when you’re unaware of the benefits. So why not educate yourself on the benefits first? For instance, you can have your space all to yourself without nosy people.
Another perk is you can be yourself without filters. Dance, sing, paint, or fill your kitchen with trash because no one is watching. But it does not have to be in a negative way.
It provides you ample time to focus on yourself, which you rarely do.
Helping others intentionally or unintentionally always makes one feel happy. So, utilize your ‘me’ time for others.
Opt for volunteering activities like feeding the orphanage or teaching underprivileged children. It will make you feel good about yourself and help them out of their misery… a win-win situation!
Through volunteer opportunities, you feel connected to people besides being alone.
It’s fine if you fail as a volunteer in one task… you always have other opportunities. So, grab random acts of kindness with your paws.
10. Practice gratitude
You may not feel happy being alone, but always be grateful for everything you have. It will make you feel at peace and happy. So next time you’re alone, make gratitude lists of everything you appreciate.
Instead of taking things for granted, be thankful for everything that brings you joy. It can be as simple as the soothing music that makes you want to dance.
So every time you are alone, you will have something to keep you going.
11. Practice self-reflection… be a mirror to yourself
When you are alone, you might judge your past mistakes. But dear, it does not work that way. Good or bad, you are stuck with yourself, and only you can make things right.
So practice self-reflection to find happiness. Notice your positive side and good qualities instead of brooding over your past.
Ignore the demons that kill your self-confidence and happiness. Listen to the good voice calling out to you.
12. Eat healthy, eat fresh
Who does not love good food? At least you do. So why not treat yourself to your favorite meal… or, offer yourself a grand dinner party. Nutritious food isn’t always bland, so look for a delish recipe.
Good food can really settle wars. Forget about take-outs and prepare something yourself. Set the table with your favorite cutleries, play some music, and enjoy your royal dinner.
These small moves will eventually bring you happiness while being alone.
13. Do something creative
Creativity is the perfect key to happiness. Creating something new during alone time always makes you feel optimistic. So, wear the creative hate and let the wizard on your surface.
It can be something you are passionate about but haven’t pursued yet. Or, try something totally new and alien to you.
So even if you never thought of playing the guitar, enroll for guitar lessons. Step out of your comfort zone and practice creativity.
14. Book the weekends for solo outings
Weekend plans keep you moving and struggling through stressful weekdays. So, it can also benefit you while you are alone. Plan solo outings and nearby trips involving your favorite activities.
Mark your calendar with solo and interesting plans and look forward to them.
Visit the local market to fetch some vegetables or shop for clothes. Attending your favorite artist’s concert or an art exhibition will make a great plan.
15. Compliment yourself, because you deserve it
Don’t loathe yourself for being alone. Self-love is really important, so practice even if you don’t like yourself. Compliment yourself with your smallest achievements.
Whether you woke up on time today or finally put on your gym shoes… It is an achievement, so appreciate yourself for it.
Stand before the mirror and say that you did something that looks impossible yesterday. If you compliment yourself for every achievement, you won’t need anyone else.
This is a great step towards finding happiness in solitude. Be someone who you can compliment yourself with every day… even when the entire world stands against you.
16. Live in the moment, it’ll never return
Stop dwelling on your past or wondering about your future. Live in the present and enjoy every moment to stay happy. You cannot change the past and have no control over the future.
Focus on everything around you currently, whether good or bad.
It’s difficult to stay happy alone if you do not live in the moment. Stop thinking about future relationships. You never know what’s in the future, so why waste time with such thoughts?
17. Educate yourself endlessly
Education is power, so grab onto it tightly. Learn new things, enhance your scope for a better life. When you educate yourself and learn new things, you’ll contribute to your personal development.
So even if you are already working, take courses and learn new skills to get a better job. In this way, rely on yourself and be happy without any fear of being alone.
18. Be your own interior designer
Build a home within yourself while staying alone. But that’s not your cue to mess up your actual home. Decorate your home for a good environment to live and thrive in.
You don’t need a grand renovation. Change the setting of your room, rearrange your furniture to a more comfortable place. Or, put on the forgotten bed sheets and curtains tossed in your cupboard.
Home décor also reflects your creativity and provides you with a new setting that might help you forget your lonely days.
19. Avoid mindless consumption
When you are alone, you have your mind all to yourself. So, utilize it in a positive way rather than wasting it over things you mindlessly consume.
It is fine to watch drama, movies, or surf the web sometimes for entertainment, but avoid doing it quite often.
Instead, utilize your mind to introspect and ask yourself questions… like where you stand and how you can make things better. In this way, you’ll work towards your growth. It will undoubtedly make you happy alone.
20. Pursue an impractical project
Possibly, you worked in group projects and always worried about standing out. Group projects require interdependence but it is not the same in impractical projects.
Impractical projects may include your wildest dreams. Or, something you don’t know how to finish but want to try.
A personal project makes you work for yourself. You realize your capabilities, even if it seems impractical to others. So why not get your hands dirty?
Short-term tips can only hold up for a while. You don’t need strong determination or intense efforts for it. So, if you want to deeply engage with something, try these…
20 Long Term Tips on How to Be Happy Alone
Are you ready to dedicate more to your happiness? Ever pictured yourself 10 years ahead in the future? What kind of person do you wanna be? Work towards some long-term dreams and find your happiness.
Learn to accept yourself for what you are and dig deeper into the ways of being happy alone in the long run here…
21. Shuffle your routine
You try doing things right and find happiness in your solitude. But it somehow starts to degrade. Well, maybe it is time to experience a change, so modify your routine.
Recurring and long-term activities often get boring. It’s the same for your daily routine.
So, when things get dull and uninteresting, spice it up. Perhaps, change your breakfast, start gardening, or dine in a new place.
Steer away from monotonous routines to find your way to happiness.
22. Strengthen your coping skills
Life will never stop throwing bouncers at you. You are destined to face ups and downs in every phase of life. So instead of hating your life or pondering on giving up, strengthen your coping skills.
Each of your tragic past incidents teaches you something. Those life lessons incorporate unique coping skills in your life.
You survived and will survive if you utilize your strength towards betterment. So next time life throws a bouncer, make sure you hit a six.
23. Nurture and nourish relationships
Being alone does not imply complete disconnection from the world. Remember the difference between being alone and being lonely?
So there’s no harm in building meaningful connections and nurturing them over time.
You may not want to socialize or depend on people for your happiness. However, check on people who love and care for you, like your family or a close friend… you will feel good.
Indulge in team outings after work or meet a close friend. How about calling that school friend you didn’t hear from in a while?
24. Practice forgiveness secretly
Forgiveness is an act of kindness that sheds some load off your mind. Some people hurt you too much for forgiveness. But if you still offer it, you put yourself beyond meaningless fights.
It is a great step towards finding peace and happiness.
No need to tell them you forgave them if you don’t talk anymore. Write a forgiveness note and you’ll eventually feel burden-free. Their thoughts won’t ever bother you.
Also, forgive yourself for everything you messed up… because you are over it now.
25. Ensure good health
Do not ever compromise with your health. It is a way of showing self-love. You and your health are precious… it directly affects your mental well-being.
So good physical health eventually adds up to your happiness.
Eat a balanced diet, maintain a healthy sleep cycle, and indulge in regular physical activities. Also, schedule an annual doctor’s appointment and go for routine check-ups.
Be physically fit enough to stay happy alone… you’ll never need anyone to take care of you.
26. Picture your future self
Long-term future plans are important to stay rooted. Living in the present and working for the future simultaneously is the key to happiness.
Don’t forget to note down your goals and aims to lead you to where you want to see yourself in 5 or 10 years.
Create a solid plan for the future and push yourself every day towards it. Find less time to brood over the fact that you are alone, and concentrate on your dreams.
Also, keep a regular check on your goals and examine how closely you are approaching them.
27. Follow your passion
No matter what you do for a living, never forget about your passion. Your passion makes you feel alive, powerful, and unique.
Even build your own business using your skills and passion.
It will not only provide you relaxation from a stressed-out professional life but also give you financial security in the long run.
Your passion will never make you tired of life, and eventually, you’ll find happiness in solitude.
28. Nurture and cherish yourself
Being alone implies you have your own company. Then why not enjoy it rather than brooding over it? Do everything that makes you feel happy… take good care of yourself.
Self-love is the first step in being happy alone. Enjoy your own company and love yourself. You won’t need others to love or appreciate yourself.
Appreciate yourself for finding the courage to stay alone… everyone doesn’t have the guts, so feel proud.
29. Value your opinions
Be least dependent on others and their advice… and you’ll find true happiness in your life. You might doubt your opinions and feel that others have better ideas. But that is not always true.
Your opinions matter, so trust yourself with your decisions. Approach a problem or situation yourself and feel stronger and more confident about your strengths.
You’ll become an independent person, and also stay out of reach from others’ manipulation.
30. Observe things around you
Observe the little things around you… perhaps it doesn’t have much meaning or connection with you. But you’ll get an idea of how the world functions around you.
So even though you are alone, observe others’ activities and feel connected.
Don’t be a stalker, but an observer. Watch from the sidelines, like it’s a television drama. Sit in a park and watch people enjoy themselves.
No, you won’t feel bad but it’ll provide you an opportunity to understand people. If it makes you happy, you know where to head.
31. Listen to silence like its sweet music
Silence is the medicine to your ears bleeding from noisy life. Be grateful to experience it as you are alone. Immerse in silence whenever possible because it’s your escape from the busy world.
No need to sit in a soundproof basement for it. Simply turn off artificial worldly lights and sit in a dark room… close your eyes to enjoy.
Introspect and dig deeper into your soul with silence. It’ll provide you with the key to your happiness.
32. Normalize talking to yourself
It is not as crazy as it sounds, and it won’t make you a psycho. Self-talk is an important aspect of life. Question or answer yourself about your life happenings.
When you are alone and don’t have anyone to talk to, feel blessed as you can finally hear your inner voice.
We usually bury our inner voice… mostly because we’re busy talking with others all day. But when you talk to yourself, you silence every other voice.
Focus on your own thoughts and find how miraculous you are. Inner voices are not always positive and might disturb you, but eventually, you know which one to catch.
33. Figure out what makes you truly happy
You put lots of effort into your career, passion, and life. Now, figure out when you were the happiest among those. What made you feel alive? Even if you get nothing for an answer, don’t fret.
Imagine what you’ll do in life if you had nothing to lose… or if you had an infinite amount of money. Many believe the key to happiness is money-making, that’s a mistake.
Note down everything that comes to your mind. Know what’s important for you and not just the world.
34. Start fresh and never give up
A strict routine doesn’t harm you… but at the end of the day, it’s only a part of your life and not your entire life.
So, it’s fine to grow and evolve with it and not just follow it blindly. But if you don’t find any difference between your life then and now, dude, it is time to start fresh.
Don’t quit your job or flee to another country. Start with small modifications in your surroundings to strike things off your bucket list.
Go hiking, learn rock climbing… There are lots to do and too little time.
35. Jump out of your comfort zone
Be open to new opportunities and challenges in your life. Step out of your comfort zone instead of waiting for a miraculous change.
Start small if you are too shy at it, like smiling back when someone smiles at you.
Explore life in a different way out of your comfort zone. Don’t be afraid of falling back or regretting if something doesn’t work out.
Meet new friends and form a meaningful connection. Remember, you don’t “need” a romantic partner to stay happy.
36. Find beauty in the ordinary
Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder. It’s not as simple as it sounds… because beauty lies in everything around us. We only need a different perspective.
So, to be happy alone, find beauty in ordinary things. It might not be a grand waterfall or mountain.
Little things in nature can fill you with immense joy… chirping birds flying in the blue sky, those tiny brinjals growing in your garden, or leaves falling off that grand oak tree. It’s there; just look harder.
17. Shut the noisy thoughts
Your thoughts are your driver. So, you might either reach a beautiful destination or fall into a pit when your thoughts drive you.
When you are alone, you experience more noisy and negative thoughts. It might be about how you ended up in your current state.
Tell your thoughts that it was your choice. It does not imply you’re unworthy of being loved or befriended.
That’s how you guide your thoughts towards a positive direction. Set aside your demons that induce negative energy.
Understand the deep connection between the mind and the body. A healthy mind is a home for good vibes and enhances self-awareness.
Practice mindfulness and meditation to begin this soothing journey.
Scientific research shows Meditation enhances the gray matter in your brain. It is a key to good mental health and critical thinking.
So steal a few minutes out of your busy life to meditate and focus on your inner self. It will add to your happiness despite being alone and connect you with nature.
39. Learn something new
It is always good to keep learning new things in life despite your age. Learn new things to keep yourself engaged and exercise your brain.
Your brain might become dull with time if you don’t feed it new information.
New hobbies will never leave you in a state of nothingness. You’ll always have something to do at hand.
Your new learning field can either be a part of your profession or passion. It works fine both ways and fills you with new opportunities.
So start with learning a new language, singing, dancing, or even astrology.
40. Adopt a pet
A furry friend is a great companion for life. At least they are better than humans, who change colors faster than the sky.
So adopt a pet to fill your life with a purpose and bring yourself unconditional joy, laughter, and challenges. Pets easily become your family members.
A pet accompanies you in your daily walks and gives you a reason to get out of your bed. Else who will take care of them? Remember you are home alone?
Foster a new relationship with your four-legged friend because happiness never pauses when you are around four paws.
It’s a way to mold your journey towards being happy alone. So why not take a step towards turning your solitude into serenity?
However, if you feel helpless or the tips don’t work, let’s know…
When is the right time to ask for professional help?
Whenever you notice the signs of anxiety or depression, always reach out for help to improve your mental health.
You went through a long list of short-term and long-term tips to stay alone.
But sometimes it may not work despite the efforts like self-love, gratitude lists, physical and mental wellness, but don’t fret.
After all, these are a few tips and don’t govern human happiness.
Seek professional help and undergo therapy if you face a hard time staying alone. Don’t wait for a disaster to take you there, or for a loved one to notice it.
Some symptoms pointing towards professional help are feelings of anxiety, depression, or stress in your daily life.
Share your issues with your therapist, and implement their offered solutions. And you’ll soon be good to go.
A word from ThePleasantRelatiosnhip
Staying alone is not a challenge so don’t consider it one. Happiness is all over in the air, so take a whiff buddy!
The day you understand solitude is a gift and not a curse, it won’t be hazy anymore, and you’ll eventually find yourself in a happy place.
Implement as many tips as you can in your daily life. If it doesn’t work out, therapy is right there for you.
Don’t forget what we started with; find happiness in being alone, and loneliness will never strike. So have a great time exploring yourself because in the end… you are your own coach!
Surabhi wakes up every day with a drive to craft words that can create a soulful impact. Creatively adventurous, she is always seeking to learn new skills and acquire new experiences. With a hidden soft corner for languages (especially Urdu), she writes poetry occasionally, binges on romantic shows, and LOVES to talk. A hustler, admirer, chaser, Surabhi is just another-someone who refused to give up on her dreams. She says, she is just somebody who’s trying to make herself a writer and for now, she’s just writing...